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grandmom 01:20 PM 04-13-2010
There could be some underlying behavior or developmental issues here that are not being acknowledged. You've reminded me of a child I had many years ago. My employee's #1 job was to find something to praise the girl for because our day was constantly reprimanding her for something. She was diagnosed after I pretty much demanded the parents let me seek help.

I'd make two suggestions. Both will require mom's permission. First, call your elementary school. In my area it's called "Child Find". It's an early assessment of children, not yet in school. School official does this, they are trained. The school receptionist will know what you are asking for.

Second, call your public health nurse through your county public health department. They also can do assessments.

Both are free in my area.

You need to enlist the mom into this. Here's a possible statement to her: I am beginning to feel that I need some help in working with your son. I'm not feeling that I am providing the kind of care I want to for him, nor am I meeting his needs. I've done some research, and have found ____ that can offer some help. I'm sure I'll need some written permission to get much more than a phone consultation, but with your permission, I'd like to make the initial call....I'll let you know what we need to do next.

She needs to be helped to understand that this boy will go into the public school system in a few short months. These behaviors must be addressed now. Good for you for seeking help now.

If she doesn't get on board, start looking for a replacement child. As he gets bigger and smarter, he will continue on this behavior. You will be not only setting yourself up for trouble with the other parents, but will be draining all your energies with this child.

Good luck.
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