I am a mom to twins that are 8 years old. Both of my boys are natural athletes. They are good at every sport that we've ever had them in (baseball, soccer and basketball so far). They don't get it from me that's for sure but anyway...the reason I'm posting is because over the weekend we had a difficult situation and I want opinions on how you would deal with this as I know I will probably have to deal with it many times in the future.

My boys are both on the same baseball team. Both two of the better players on the team...and really in the league. I know I'm biased but to prove it, they were the first kids drafted out of the whole league *(about 100 kids) and had 3 coaches fight over them so I know they are pretty good. They each average at least one home run a game knocking in 2-3 other runs each bat and are good in the field too. Anyway, a few weeks ago our coach comes up to me and asks if I've thought about them being on the all star team. I told him I would love that but I was worried that one or the other may not make it and then there would be hurt feelings and I'm not ready to deal with that yet. Anyway, he assured me that both would almost positively make the team. He couldn't see them not making the team. I said ok then...let's do it. So both boys had try-outs and both didn't do that great. No one did actually for several different reasons. One being that they are all used to hitting off of a coach as it is coach pitch and the other reason is because they were all kinda antsy from sitting an hour and waiting to bat and field.


Well, one made it and one didn't. At first I told the coach nevermind...neither one would play and I just wasn't going to say anything to either of them. Then I had second thoughts and realized I didn't want to take away one's glory just to spare hurt feelings for the other. I told the one who didn't make it first. He already knew he had a bad tryout. He cried and cried and I cried with him. Then I let him tell his brother that he made the team. I tried to build up brother and how we would support brother even though he didn't make the team. Brother cried cause he didn't want to play without his twin. It was a sad day for all of us! Anyway, we talked it up to brother and he got excited about the all start team and us traveling together for the tournaments. There's still some hurt feelings for my other twin son and I'm not sure how to deal with it. I keep telling him I know he had a bad tryout and it's not fair but that's the way it is sometimes. Life isn't fair.

It's really hard for me to deal with too because they both play so good and one really isn't that much better than the other. In fact I was more worried about the one who did make it not making it because he plays outfield more and doesn't see a lot of action out there most games.

Anyway, sorry this is so long. Does anyone have twins or siblings close in age that this has happened to? Or just any advice on how to deal with this. ALl stars will last most of June and so I know it will be hard for my twin who didn't make it to have to sit at practices and not be able to be on the team.
Any advice is appreciated. What would you do? What can I still do to help them? And what's somethign I can do in hte future as I know this will probably happen again one day.

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