Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hi,
FTM here and new to daycare in general. This was my child’s first week at an in home daycare. The main area is in the basement of a home. The provider always meets me at the door and doesn’t invite me down to the basement. I asked to go down and she said to text her ahead of time and that I could only go there for a few minutes. She also told me if I visited at lunch, I could not nurse my baby down in the basement but would have to stay upstairs. This bothered me and I called local child care licensing to ask if this was normal or not. They said it wasn’t and encouraged me to file a complaint. The same day, I went to pick up my child and the provider pulled me aside to apologize and explained her reasoning but said I could go downstairs at any time.
Long story short, I felt we had a misunderstanding about the whole thing and felt better after we talked. I immediately emailed the licensing people and said I made a mistake regarding the complaint. Will they be able to “cancel” it? I don’t want them pursing it especially since I feel bad for not being clearer with her and also, I don’t want her upset with me (it was anonymous but she’ll know it was from me I am sure )
I wish I had just communicated better with her rather than calling them for advice and getting persuaded into making a complaint
Sorry this was so long- this daycare thing mixed with new Mom anxiety is making trouble for me 
I have learned that every daycare operate so differently, and they all have such different set-ups, so their policies generally reflect rules to make their job go as smoothly as possible. In this case, you believed you had access to the basement at all times and she put conditions on that access, so you went above her head. When you spoke next, you cleared up the misinformation, but imo, the damage is done. Now every time she tells you no, she has to fear that you're going to call licensing on her. You would be a risky client for me, so I would most definitely terminate care.
It's very frustrating as a provider that every rule we have is questioned as though we have something to hide. Maybe she got new carpet on her stairs and didn't want people coming in and out. Maybe someone recently fell on the stairs and she's freaked out by having parents up and down them. Maybe when you come down into the basement, it squeaks the floorboards and the babies who are napping will wake up. There can be so many reasons other than she's hiding something. A simple conversation cleared up the issue. So if you liked her and felt good about her care and this was just a single issue that bothered you, have the conversation first, and if it still feels upsetting or uncomfortable, then find new care. Calling licensing was an over reaction imo, since it seems like a simple conversation cleared it up. If you truly felt she was hiding something or providing unsafe care, then I would pull my child and make the call for sure, but this doesn't appear to be the case. Anyway, best of luck in your childcare search and just remember to keep open communication with your provider!
