Just before I was forced to retire (heart attack)I was feeling the same way.I at some level wished for an easy way out.That was not actually easy but it was a way out.I was devastated at first missing "my babies"and the business of the days.It took about 6 months to get myself used to the difference in my daily life.I was lucky that my husband had just gone back to work and we were covered by insurance.I eventually went on disability as I am on a lot of medications to regulate my heart. I miss the children and some parts of the days.I would tell you to do what makes your days happy.More play,routine and pick days for meals and activities just like other posters said.If you can Josie why not plan on retiring soon.Maybe then you could enjoy retiring sooner than later.Good luck.

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