Originally Posted by Ariana:
We have the exact same 20 month old! I asked a similar question and most people said it is not a big deal that they cannot ask for what they want. I disagree to some extent.
I honestly think that any behavior that sticks out to where you make a post is abnormal behaviour. Having worked with hundreds of kids I cannot remember a child behaving like this except for one I suspected to be on the autism spectrum. Most kids by this time ask for more and can nod yes and no. My current 14 month old can nod yes annd no and whines and points. Getting their needs met is extremely important and although it could be a case of the parents just doing everything I can’t fathom a child never ever having to ask for their needs to be met.
Long story short, are there other things that seem off about him? The kid I had with ASD never once asked for anything ever in the year or so he was with me. I suspected ASD from the first day but waited until he was 2.5 before saying something because everyone said wait and see. If everything else seems fine then maybe he just needs some extra work in coommunicating. The 20 month old I have communicates mostly through Echolallia so just repeats what I have said.
Thanks for weighing in. He does seem off to me but I also watched his older sister since she was a baby and she is now in school. She also seemed off as a toddler but is a pretty typical kid now with maybe just some weird quirks here and there so I was chalking up his "offness" to their parenting style. But his lack of communication is become more apparent as he is getting older. He doesn't play with toys, but rather sits and fiddles with them or plays with his fingers. When he is done playing in an area, I have to move him because he won't move himself despite his ability to walk or he will cry in frustration. It takes him a long time to respond to directions. He doesn't get excited about things that most toddlers get excited about like doing movement songs and refuses to dance or copy my movements. I'm friends with his mom and have seen how he interacts at his house. He does initiate there with sometimes pointing, but mostly just yelling or these gibberish sentences he puts together that has the sound of a sentence but no actual words. I have brought it up to mom and she says he's just being shy with me but I have watched him since he was a little baby. I asked for a list of words he says spontaneously at home and she gave me 4. Mama, ball, milk, done. I have worked specifically on those words with him here except mama. Mom is not worried. I honestly can't tell if it's a mix of parenting style/stubborness/and having some weird quirks, or if it's a more serious problem, or he's just not developmentally there yet.