Originally Posted by Unregistered:
4 years old and not potty trained with aggression? Hmmm is there any way you can suggest to the parents that the child be seen by ESD? I personaly refuse to change a 4 yr olds diaper unless its due to a medical condition, the ONLY time iv ever had an issue with a child that old not being fully potty trained was with a set of twin boys who have aspergers(sp?), You're in the first week of care and he is exhibiting this much aggression, not normal. Also if you are feeling this frustrated with the way he acts how do you think your daughter and other children (who are the ones being yelled at and hit) feel? I do think it sounds like he has something going on but you are a childcare provider not a therapist, talk to dcm and tell her flat out that his behavior is not normal in your experiance and his anger and lashing out is unsafe for the other kids in your care. Ask her to have him evaluated, not for you, not for her but for him.
I'd let her know too that his staying in your care is not a garuntee even if the child does have some kind of mental delay or disorder that is diagnosed as you are not equiped to deal with a child like that while providing a safe environment for the other children in your care..Ohh and I also have it in my policies that if child is not fully potty trained by 4 their weekly fee will be more..I'd also like to know what the previous provider has to say ONLY as i would like to know how long she kept him and how cooperative the parents are, sady (from my experiance) some parents refuse to get help for their child because they wont consider the fact that their precious offspring may not be up to the normal standards of society (who is perfectly normal anyway?). So I guess if it was me I would give mom a written notice stating that they are on a (do you have a two week clause in your contract) week or two week probation notice due to the violent behavior of the child. If the behvior has not improved drastically their last day of care will be ***x, unless above mentioned behavior becomes to unsafe for the other children at which time the childcare contract would be terminated immidiately..
Or something like that, I'm still concerned that the other provider terminated without notice, I know some providers dont handle themselves proffessionaly but most of us give them two weeks or more unless theirs a major issue kwim??? good luck and please update..
My son is overly agressive and has so many trying moments, so I can somewhat empathise with the mother of this little boy. You definitely need to have a talk with his mother and try to *gently* explain to her that, while he may be a bright little boy, if she doesn't get a handle on him, he's going to have life-long problems. Depending on how much you think you can handle, I think the 30 day probationary period sounds like a good idea. You may want to help this child, but ultimately it is his mother who is going to need to take the lead on his development and get him help if needed.
And no--it is NOT normal for a 4 year old to not be potty trained. Either he has developmental issues or his mother just doesn't do what she needs to with him at home. Good luck to you
and please keep us updated.