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Old 07-29-2010, 11:38 AM
Aya477 Aya477 is offline Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 40

I do not subscribe to pawning my child off to anyone else for any reason other than work but that is because I was fortunate enough to be raised in a stay at home mom family. And I wholeheartedly believe that has made the difference in how I parent vs what you describe as modern parenting.

The fact of the matter is that a shift in society has been brewing for decades that has created what ProMom described: parents who elect to devote time to activities for themselves. Go back to the 1800's or even early 1900's where we have cold hard documented evidence of family dynamics. Did the mom stay at home? Yeah, she was at home but she was busy tending to the garden or doing house chores. A nanny raised the children. My father was born in 1938 and he was raised by a live-in nanny. His mom was responsible for keeping up the massive garden which provided food for the family of 8 (plus live-in helpers) along with doing all of the household duties. My Dad's father held down the job. This really was very common during this era. Then society changed again where jobs became open to women and women were encouraged to get out in the workplace. Women wanted to work to liberate themselves. Then ultimately it became a necessity for women to work to provide dual income so that family's could achieve the ridiculous idea of The American Dream. Now, take that on thru to the early 90's where the American Dream lifestyle spanned out to include self luxuries like pedicures, spa treatments, mental days, etc. The younger generation of women were born into all of this ideology that society has perpetuated for as long as their parents have been alive. So, really what do you expect modern-age parents to do? This is how majority society has encouraged women to live.

Do not look for short term change in this way of life either. In fact, expect it to get worse because more people will find the need for dual family incomes as the cost of living continues to increase and their families expand. Americans are encouraged to spend to maintain the USA economy and world economy. Americans will continue to want to have everything because having everything in society's perception signifies that you have achieved something great. This cycle will perpetuate for longer than you or I will live.

Here's a funny story--my son attended a locally owned daycare center. The owner of this daycare told me that her center was successful and that I could see how successful the center has been because she drove an 80k Mercedes. This coming from a middle-aged woman......who gave her the idea that success is determined by your possessions? SOCIETY.

So sit back and be thankful that women are going to work and placing their children in your care. You being the childcare provider has income because of this. And if you believe that studies prove that children who have absent parents suffer, then look at yourself as the hero....these children care for YOU and the time you are giving them. Perhaps you can make a difference in a child's life.
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