Daycare.com Forum - View Single Post - Times Are Changing

Originally Posted by nanglgrl:
I'm so happy for you too! I'm glad it only took you a year. I wish it hadn't taken me so long.
I think one of my biggest downfalls was my sympathy towards single parents and students with children. I tended to believe every sob story and to change my program to meet their needs. When I started watching the second shifter the mom called and asked if I did second shift. I told her no and she started crying. She asked me if I knew anyone that did and I told her no but to call our local referral place and if she couldn't find anyone to give me a call back. A few days later she called back because she wasn't able to find anyone and I agreed to do it on a temporary basis. It ended up being 2 years because felt I just couldn't make her life more stressful. Then I realized that yes I was making her life easier but I was suffering, my children were suffering. Ug, why did it take me 2 years?

I confess I've never charged a late fee although I should have at least a thousand times. Don't cyber smack me yet! Lately I've been waiting for someone to show up late so I can charge them. Not that I want to work late or charge extra but because I WANT to use my backbone!
I also have gotten really good at saying, " I'll think about it and let you know" when I'm put on the spot. All because of this forum.

Recently I had one of my parents call and say she was going to be 15 minutes late because she was caught on a call and I responded with, "thank you for letting me know! I won't charge you a late fee this time but that only applies to THIS instance" (I would have charged if she was late a lot but this was the first time and I have NO problems with her). In the past I would have just said "o.k" and never mentioned a late charge even if the parent was a habitual offender.

I realize I wasn't using my backbone because I didn't want to anger anyone. I thought I would lose business that way. Then I read about how providers on here enforce their policies when needed but rarely if ever does the parent respond negatively and how the parent rarely makes the same mistake twice. These providers also seem to be the most appreciated by their clients, better paid and sought after for daycare services in their communities.

I think most of the people on this board are probably great with the part of the job that consist of nurturing and teaching children but it seems where these providers differ is they demand respect. They have their policies and expect them to be followed. They value themselves and their services and in turn so do the parents.

Like you I'm growing! Yeah for us! The more I do what I want the better clients I seem to attract. Right now I have a parent paying to hold a spot for 3 months while her husband is laid off. I've never had someone pay to hold a spot! I never even had the courage to ask or give that as an option. I also have a client that comes from 8-12 every day and pays for full time care.

I felt bad charging her for full time at first but then I thought what a pain in the butt it was going to be for me to have someone leave right before nap and how I would never find someone to fill the remainder of the day so I would be limiting my income. I couldn't believe she agreed to it but she is my best parent. She never breaks policies and shows/tells me how she appreciates me all of the time. I took off 3 days for paid holidays Christmas week and 2 the following week and her child wasn't here the other days because dad was off work. I felt bad charging her the full rate for those 2 weeks and came close to offering her a discount but I held strong and didn't. She obviously didn't think twice about paying her regular rate for 2 weeks because she added a Christmas bonus on top of it!

You have written such a nice post and I am glad that you did! I too am like you, I tend to feel bad for people and believe every story! I also have learned a lot since joining this forum. I haven't opened yet, but am in a couple of weeks and from reading this (your) post and others, I have realized that I'm going to HAVE to have a backbone in order for families to respect me. I keep going through different scenerios (sp?) in my head of difficulties that may arise and what I would do or say to respond to them. I would always think "well I could fudge the rules just for that", but not now! Thank you for writing such an inspiring post and making me realize that you can actually be "too" nice!