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  #1  
Old 02-15-2016, 06:12 PM
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Default Unsanitary Family

I send my child to a daycare. I don't mean to sound mean, but there is one family that really grosses me out. They have a baby and an older child who is in the same room as my child. They always seems of body odor and feces and urine. Not like a freshly dirty diaper. Like an embedded filthy smell. It really upsets me, but I have my own life. Well, the older child got stomach flu and passed to the baby and it has passed to my child. I talked to the ladies who work there and nothing was done. I spoke to the owner. They were dismissive of me. I am currently looking for a new daycare, but I don't think it's fair this dirty family is hurting their own kids and other kids. Could I call anyone on them? I don't know who to call. I feel this is some sort of abuse.
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Old 02-15-2016, 07:36 PM
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I think the best thing to do is to find new care as you have stated. I don't think you are in a position to report anything about that family. The owner or Caregiver that has direct contact with the family should be the ones to report them. They might feel the same as you do and already reported (but they do not need to report that to you) or they may not feel the same as you do because they have contact with the family. Kids who are clean also get the stomach flu and it is up to the daycare to send them home but you cannot know 100% that they are the reason your child got sick. Don't assume that since the director was passive that she didn't do anything. If she is a professional she noted your concern but did not share her feelings or any information about the other family and is either keeping an eye on it or has it handled. You did your part.
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Old 02-16-2016, 01:51 AM
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Completely agree. It sounds like a new daycare is needed. You really have no clue what's going on with the dcf. And it's so easy to pass germs no matter how sanitary the place and children are unless everybody is in their own little bubble.
Good luck with your search!
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  #4  
Old 02-16-2016, 05:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
I send my child to a daycare. I don't mean to sound mean, but there is one family that really grosses me out. They have a baby and an older child who is in the same room as my child. They always seems of body odor and feces and urine. Not like a freshly dirty diaper. Like an embedded filthy smell. It really upsets me, but I have my own life. Well, the older child got stomach flu and passed to the baby and it has passed to my child. I talked to the ladies who work there and nothing was done. I spoke to the owner. They were dismissive of me. I am currently looking for a new daycare, but I don't think it's fair this dirty family is hurting their own kids and other kids. Could I call anyone on them? I don't know who to call. I feel this is some sort of abuse.
If your child is in good health, gets plenty of good sleep and lots of outdoor time/exercise and eats a healthy well balanced diet then the likelihood of your child catching anything from someone else is pretty minimal.

Assuming your child caught an illness from one specific child or family is silly. Unless your child (as well as you and anyone your child comes into contact with) never goes anywhere and never has any contact with other humans it is IMPOSSIBLE to pinpoint where an illness originated.

Im also curious what you thought the owner was suppose to do? Were they suppose to terminate care for the family that supposedly passed the illness around?

I am thinking they were dismissive to you because in all my years of being a child care provider, I'd MUCH prefer to deal with a family that struggles with basic needs such as cleanliness than deal with a family that is as judgmental as your post.

Parents who actually think illnesses are directly related to ONE person/child or parents that feel their child is "better" or somehow more deserving than another are clients I try to weed out and not enroll in my program. It's an attitude I simply can't deal with.

If you are unhappy with the program YOU enrolled YOUR child in and with the way the staff runs that program YOU have a choice: Find other care.
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Old 02-16-2016, 05:30 AM
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If you are in a center that MAY be part of the issue. As others have said they may be trying to do something but can only do so much. Also some centers (not all), will keep children and let sick children come just because they are paying customers. But many times the employees at the center level are powerless. I agree that I would find other care. Maybe a small, locally owned center or a home daycare. In those situations, we are the owners and have full power to deal with things. That being said if we did call and make a report, or if we were working with the family on something, we still couldn't tell you that.
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Old 02-16-2016, 06:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
If your child is in good health, gets plenty of good sleep and lots of outdoor time/exercise and eats a healthy well balanced diet then the likelihood of your child catching anything from someone else is pretty minimal.

Assuming your child caught an illness from one specific child or family is silly. Unless your child (as well as you and anyone your child comes into contact with) never goes anywhere and never has any contact with other humans it is IMPOSSIBLE to pinpoint where an illness originated.

Im also curious what you thought the owner was suppose to do? Were they suppose to terminate care for the family that supposedly passed the illness around?

I am thinking they were dismissive to you because in all my years of being a child care provider, I'd MUCH prefer to deal with a family that struggles with basic needs such as cleanliness than deal with a family that is as judgmental as your post.

Parents who actually think illnesses are directly related to ONE person/child or parents that feel their child is "better" or somehow more deserving than another are clients I try to weed out and not enroll in my program. It's an attitude I simply can't deal with.

If you are unhappy with the program YOU enrolled YOUR child in and with the way the staff runs that program YOU have a choice: Find other care.
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Old 02-16-2016, 04:48 PM
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Originally Posted by Thriftylady View Post
If you are in a center that MAY be part of the issue. As others have said they may be trying to do something but can only do so much. Also some centers (not all), will keep children and let sick children come just because they are paying customers. But many times the employees at the center level are powerless. I agree that I would find other care. Maybe a small, locally owned center or a home daycare. In those situations, we are the owners and have full power to deal with things. That being said if we did call and make a report, or if we were working with the family on something, we still couldn't tell you that.
I'm actually thinking of just hiring a babysitter at this point, because this seems to be an issue with all of the outside options I've been looking into. To everyone who thinks I'm just making it up, these children have been very sick often. They're there from like opening until closing. I was picking my child up when I heard them calling the parents to pick up and it sounded like it was falling on deaf ears. Like I said, I know what the situation is and they are often sick. My child will say the older child throw up in the room. I know what is going on. I am trying to help these children. Everyone here seems to think it's ok to be dirty. I know kids get dirty, but they shouldn't smell of feces and urine. For everyone saying poverty, maybe they're being sexually abused. I knew one girl when I was a teenager who stunk of urine, because she was being abused. The case was, due to being abused she couldn't control her bladder. I guess if the person who called the authorities on her family, it was her uncle!, wasn't judgmental, she could continue being abused.
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Old 02-16-2016, 05:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
I'm actually thinking of just hiring a babysitter at this point, because this seems to be an issue with all of the outside options I've been looking into. To everyone who thinks I'm just making it up, these children have been very sick often. They're there from like opening until closing. I was picking my child up when I heard them calling the parents to pick up and it sounded like it was falling on deaf ears. Like I said, I know what the situation is and they are often sick. My child will say the older child throw up in the room. I know what is going on. I am trying to help these children. Everyone here seems to think it's ok to be dirty. I know kids get dirty, but they shouldn't smell of feces and urine. For everyone saying poverty, maybe they're being sexually abused. I knew one girl when I was a teenager who stunk of urine, because she was being abused. The case was, due to being abused she couldn't control her bladder. I guess if the person who called the authorities on her family, it was her uncle!, wasn't judgmental, she could continue being abused.
No one here is saying it is okay to have filthy kids. But what we are saying is you don't know, the center may have already called social services. There may be an open investigation. Your calling won't really do much. Do you know their full names? Do you know the address? Those are just the first two things that are required to make a report.

I also agree with BC, that you can't KNOW why a child got sick. They can be exposed anywhere. Is the only place the child is at home and at daycare? Are they NEVER around family or the public? Do you not go out to eat, go grocery shopping as a family or go to church?

At the end of the day if you are not happy with where your child is, please DO move your child! I tell all DCP's to use their eyes, ears and all other senses when finding daycare. You should never leave your child another day or another hour where you have concerns. But the other children, the center can't talk to you about them due to privacy laws. Also know that no matter where you find childcare, your kiddo will be exposed to sick kids. There are many things that we don't see signs of until days after they are contagious. Meaning, that the whole daycare is exposed before anyone knows the first child is sick.
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  #9  
Old 02-16-2016, 07:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
I'm actually thinking of just hiring a babysitter at this point, because this seems to be an issue with all of the outside options I've been looking into. To everyone who thinks I'm just making it up, these children have been very sick often. They're there from like opening until closing. I was picking my child up when I heard them calling the parents to pick up and it sounded like it was falling on deaf ears. Like I said, I know what the situation is and they are often sick. My child will say the older child throw up in the room. I know what is going on. I am trying to help these children. Everyone here seems to think it's ok to be dirty. I know kids get dirty, but they shouldn't smell of feces and urine. For everyone saying poverty, maybe they're being sexually abused. I knew one girl when I was a teenager who stunk of urine, because she was being abused. The case was, due to being abused she couldn't control her bladder. I guess if the person who called the authorities on her family, it was her uncle!, wasn't judgmental, she could continue being abused.
I apologize if my post offended you. I stand by what I said but I also acknowledge that I do not know all the details and know only what your original post said.

What state are you in? I am sure we can help find the proper contact info for your area so that you can report this to DHS and/or CPS.

ANYONE has a right (and in my honest opinion, a moral obligation) to report any suspected abuse or neglect of a child to the proper authorities.

You don't need the support or assistance of any of the staff or workers at the child care.
The authorities will question everyone necessary and investigate further if needed.

If you are concerned, call.
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  #10  
Old 02-17-2016, 05:22 AM
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I, too, have a family with questionable hygiene practices. And I often worry about what other clients may think as well as the health of my home. I've spoken to the mother multiple times and it does no good. She is simply too lazy to make sure her kids are clean. I feel sad for the kids but short of bathing them myself, and I do bathe the baby occasionally when it gets really bad, there's not a whole lot else to be done. While I think it's neglectful to allow your children to wallow in urine and feces and your preteen to go unwashed and wear the same clothing to school day after day, the state often times sees it differently. Unless there is a history or suspicion of drug abuse CPS usually won't do anything about it. There aren't enough foster parents available to remove children because their parents are lazy.
The kids I speak of are also often sick, but I think it has more to do with the fact that they don't get enough rest and live off "snacks" and fast food than hygiene. If it bothers you that much I would see about placing my children elsewhere. Honestly though, you may find that this "problem" wherever you go. It's more common than you think.
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