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  #1  
Old 04-07-2009, 08:21 PM
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Default Confidentiality

Today when I arrived at my daycare to pick up my child, there was an ambulance there. My daugther went in to pick him up and when they got in the car I asked if someone was sick, his response was there was a "dead body". I called the daycare to make sure everything was alright and was told the information was confidential. I told the employee to have the owner to contact me. When the owner finally contacted me, she stated the same thing...the information was confidential. I told her that I had a right to know if my child's health was in jeopardy and she had an obligation to assure me of that by explaining why an ambulance was there. She demanded that I apologize to the employees that I spoke with earlier and when I asked why, she became very irritated and kicked my child out of the daycare. As a parent, do I have a right to know why an ambulance was at the daycare, especially after the comment that my child made about a dead body?
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  #2  
Old 04-08-2009, 06:07 PM
Ms.Sue Ms.Sue is offline
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Default you won't like my answer

it's YOUR job to go inside and retrieve your child - not your daughters. Maybe if you took the time to walk in there you would be more informed.

And, yes, if it doesn't concern your child- then it is confidential. I can only assume that the center will send out a statement explaining what happened so that you can address it at home.
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  #3  
Old 04-09-2009, 05:33 AM
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Thumbs down Hmm...

If it was something your child could catch that was some deadly disease you would know about it already. Since i'm sure something like a rampid plague of ebola hasn't happened in your daycare, do you really feel it is your business? People have the right to their privacy, especially the person in the ambulance and the family of the person in the ambulance. I honestly don't think it was any of your business and there will probably be a notice sent home to let the parents know what they need to know (what they NEED to know, not what they WANT to know).
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Old 04-09-2009, 01:46 PM
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If it had anything to do with your child you would have been the second person they called (1st being 911) Other then that no you do not have the right to know what was going on since it had nothing to do with your child at the time & to pursue it was rude & inconsiderate on your part. The Center had more things to worry about then answering your questions (the children in care & the family of the "dead body" (which may have been a child or not)) Centers & in home providers all must follow the confidentiality rule when it comes to the children in care & their business. How would you like it if a center gave out information to another parent about your child?
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  #5  
Old 04-09-2009, 08:47 PM
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Default Wow

Don't you think we are being a little hard on this poor women. She is just worried about her child (Grandchild) WE ARE DAYCARE PROVIDERS. YES WE KNOW THE RULES. BUT LETS NOT ATTACK THIS POOR WOMEN. She probably doesn't know we can't give out information if its not her child. I know you are worried about your child as any of us would. But we have to follow rules in this industry. Trust me I have been in some centers where I have left because the teachers were horriable to the children and the stupid director had her head up her -ss. Places like that should be closed down. I'm working on one right now!!!! I'm sure your child will be fine. They will issue some kind of statement.
I'm a Grandmother too.
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  #6  
Old 04-11-2009, 11:34 PM
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Default ?

I apologize if I seemed like I was being too aggressive, that wasn't my intention. Just my opinion as a daycare provider and a mom. Just to clarify though I was under the impression the original writer with the concern was the mother of the child in daycare, not a grandmother, just that she sent her older daughter in to pick up her child for her...
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  #7  
Old 04-15-2009, 12:20 PM
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Angry Wow!

As a parent, I believe that SOME sort of explaination was due to this mother. If I were in this situation, I would not have taken my children back to this daycare. PERIOD.

There would be no need to give out confidential information in order to give an explaination to a parent. All that need be said is that a person (a child, a worker, a family member, the specifics are not necessary) was hurt or had an incident or SOMETHING. To completely refuse to give ANY information gives me the impression that they were at fault or negligent in some way. Children DO get abused and neglected at daycare... it's sad and nobody wants to think of it happening, but as a parent, this is what we are concerned about. Not only that, but this poor child was under the impression that there was a dead body at daycare. Why not give the mother a little bit of information so that she could explain it to the child at home and deal with any emotional issues?

This forum is making me a little ill--it really seems like it's parents against providers.
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  #8  
Old 04-16-2009, 04:17 AM
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Unhappy The rock and the hard place

OK. I'm a mother of 4 and i've been a provider and i'm in the medical field now. I can say as a parent, i'd be concerned, of course. But as the provider it's a no-win situation. Child care providers, like many other businesses nowadays, have to deal with a lot more fears than people give credit for. This is a sue-happy society. If I was the director of a child care facility and something like this happened, I would be absolutely terrified. If I give out information, I could be sued for breach of confidentiality by the person in the ambulance or the family of the person in the ambulance. If I don't give out the details to parents, i'd end up facing the threats of lawsuits by parents thinking it must've been abuse or negligence, or the threats of them telling me they're going to take their children out if I don't give up information I cannot legally give to them. It's not so cut and dry as just telling them a little, because I can't know how much information is going to be too much information in the opinion of the person in the ambulance.

You say children get abused and neglected in daycare, and that's true. It's not that it's often - it's that when it does happen it makes the headlines. You don't hear about daycares doing good jobs. That's not news. And it's actually more likely that a child be abused in the home by someone they know than it is for them to be abused in a daycare setting. You also say no one wants to think about it and that is absolutely not true. People think it, parents think it, they play it in their heads, every scenario, every possibility, every fear...it is always on people's minds. It's a parents worst nightmare. It's a society's worst nightmare. That's why it festers so much. So when a parent hears their child say something, instead of questioning it or investigating it a little more, they jump straight to the worst possible scenario - someone hurting a child. Their child. Kind of like you did when you said they didn't give any information which made you assume it must've been abuse or neglect.

Being a parent and a former provider, i'm on both sides of the coin. I've had trouble finding good childcare, i've found great childcare, i've dealt with bad parents, and i've had great parents too. I'm not "against" anyone on this forum board and I actually think it's a good thing that people can passionately (sp?) express their opinions on a forum board so maybe people will be able to see things from someone else's point of view.
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  #9  
Old 04-16-2009, 08:42 AM
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Angry Wow!!

First I just want to say the attitudes of these daycare providers who are responding is unbelievable and proves why there is so much wrong doing going on in the daycares. This woman was concerned for her child, what part of that dont you understand. I do understand that the other family has a right to privacy but could you explain your side without attitude. The daycare could have taken time to explain to her that either A) i promise that this incident will not harm your child in anyway or B) explain that if it was due to an illness that is contaigous then the mother has every right to know if her child has been exposed. I do not believe they should have kicked their child out of the center. That is ridiculous. I hope to the people who responded from daycares with attitudes that their centers are being ran right. I witnessed something horrible in a daycare here in Wheaton, Illinois to teachers grabbing children by their arm (off the ground) and being screamed at. Infact we hired an investigator who took pictures. When another teacher reported this to the director the teacher got fired for "yelling at the teacher about grabbing the child by their arm". This teacher never even talked to that teacher she went right to the office. The day this happened the teacher went to report is the director went home early and the assistant director was off on maternity leave so there was no one in charge of the center. This teacher had to wait for the next day to report it. This proves the attitudes of the directors and teachers are putting our children at risk for abuse and they dont even care!!! Just so everyone knows if you live around Wheaton, Illinois do not put your children in Chesterbrook Academy. This is the second time in three months they are under investigation with DCFS for child abuse!!! Pam the director is doing everything she can to cover up these incidetns by firing teachers who are witnessing this abuse and calling them out!!
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  #10  
Old 04-17-2009, 03:43 AM
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Thumbs down Interesting...

First - it's easy to misinterpret someone's "attitude" on chat board. You can't hear tones, there's no voice, no real contact. Providers and parents alike can seem to have "attitude" without actually intending to send that vibe.

Second - Personally, I can see where she'd be concerned (like i've said) but I responded the way I did because I know I am only getting one side of the story. And i'm not saying the orginal poster was lying i'm saying she may have a completely different perspective of what happened at the daycare. Maybe what she thought was harmless inquiries about what happened came across as aggressive to the providers or maybe the teachers didn't know how to respond to her and she took it as them hiding something. How overwhelmed would a teacher be if another teacher dropped dead in front of them and then they had a hoard of parents on them?! Providers are only human, they probably had a devastating day that day and didn't know how to react. And there might be more than just this incident that led to her child being dropped from the daycare. I'M NOT SAYING THIS TO BE RUDE, i'm just saying there is probably much more to this story than we know but as it is, the director is most likely obligated to keep the medical information confidential. And like Ms. Sue said there will most likely be notification to the parents about what happened.

And finally - The original post was about confidentiality. And peepers, you have used it to talk about child abuse in a daycare that by my count you have already posted warnings about in 4 seperate posts in this and other discussions. It's starting to sound more and more like a personal problem you have with the daycare than it is an actual founded complaint.
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  #11  
Old 04-23-2009, 04:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ConcernedMotherof2 View Post
As a parent, I believe that SOME sort of explaination was due to this mother. If I were in this situation, I would not have taken my children back to this daycare. PERIOD.

There would be no need to give out confidential information in order to give an explaination to a parent. All that need be said is that a person (a child, a worker, a family member, the specifics are not necessary) was hurt or had an incident or SOMETHING. To completely refuse to give ANY information gives me the impression that they were at fault or negligent in some way. Children DO get abused and neglected at daycare... it's sad and nobody wants to think of it happening, but as a parent, this is what we are concerned about. Not only that, but this poor child was under the impression that there was a dead body at daycare. Why not give the mother a little bit of information so that she could explain it to the child at home and deal with any emotional issues?

This forum is making me a little ill--it really seems like it's parents against providers.
VERY WELL SAID, I agree, some type of statement was warranted. I know I wouldn't take my child back until I knew some of the details, not names, but basic statement just so I knew it would be ok to return.
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  #12  
Old 07-15-2009, 08:19 AM
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lilbiddapopcorn, you have excellent points. The only thing I was trying to get across is that a small bit of information is due to the parents. I understand confidentiality and that DC providers need to protect their business, as any business. However, this concerns our children, the most important people in our lives. It is a sticky situation for everyone involved, but shouldn't every business have a plan when it comes to emergencies?

Yes, there are going to be parents who storm the gates when such events happen and I am not backing up their methods. I understand their feelings, as you've stated that you do as well, but mutual respect should always exist.

My comment about it seeming like it was providers against parents still stands. I'm all for passionate expression of opinion. However, it is my whole-hearted belief that we should all be working together for the good of the children. We are not dealing with products or usual business services here, we are dealing with CHILDREN. You seem to understand that and I am not trying to attack you (as a matter of fact, you seem like just the sort of provider I would want taking care of my children). I am aware that not all parents care and that way too many people complain and not enough people sing the praises of the good providers. (please excuse my half-thoughts... I'm writing this from work)
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  #13  
Old 08-20-2009, 03:01 PM
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Default can i sue daycare???

i need major help! im having problems with my daughter's father. and basically hes a dead beat. his mother is crazy...and i mean litterally crazy. and i feel she is a danger to have near my daughter. well see, i have a new boyfriend now and i moved in here with him, and choose not to have any contact with my child's father or his mother anymore. i dont want him to know where i live or what daycare i put my daughter in, because im afraid that his mom and him will try to pick her up and kidnap her. so i didnt let him know my address, or what daycare i was putting my daughter in. but the thing is..today i found out that a friend of my child's father is the girl thats been watching my daughter at the daycare!!!!!! not only that but she gave him private information on what daycare shes in,what transportation i use to get there, and what time i pick her up. for all i know, she probabally gave my address as well!!! i tried to confront the daycare, but they said they dismissed her a while now. what do i do???? i feel like suing the daycare! its their responcibility to keep private information concealed. im so lucky that his mother didnt pick her up and try to kidnap her since she knew where my daughter was during the day. and to top that off, one day i went to pick my daughter up and they told me they moved her to a different room, so when i went to get her, the lady that was watching my daughter, tried to pawn 3 kids off to me saying it was my child when it wasent.she didnt even ask for i.d she was just eager to get rid of any child and to whom whoever! then when i confronted them for not only having the employee give private info out but to also say how the lady watching kids tried to pawn them off.her own responce was that she dismissed "both" of them a while ago. i think i have a case. do I????
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Old 08-21-2009, 06:28 AM
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Unhappy law suit

Quote:
Originally Posted by ladymom123 View Post
i need major help! im having problems with my daughter's father. and basically hes a dead beat. his mother is crazy...and i mean litterally crazy. and i feel she is a danger to have near my daughter. well see, i have a new boyfriend now and i moved in here with him, and choose not to have any contact with my child's father or his mother anymore. i dont want him to know where i live or what daycare i put my daughter in, because im afraid that his mom and him will try to pick her up and kidnap her. so i didnt let him know my address, or what daycare i was putting my daughter in. but the thing is..today i found out that a friend of my child's father is the girl thats been watching my daughter at the daycare!!!!!! not only that but she gave him private information on what daycare shes in,what transportation i use to get there, and what time i pick her up. for all i know, she probabally gave my address as well!!! i tried to confront the daycare, but they said they dismissed her a while now. what do i do???? i feel like suing the daycare! its their responcibility to keep private information concealed. im so lucky that his mother didnt pick her up and try to kidnap her since she knew where my daughter was during the day. and to top that off, one day i went to pick my daughter up and they told me they moved her to a different room, so when i went to get her, the lady that was watching my daughter, tried to pawn 3 kids off to me saying it was my child when it wasent.she didnt even ask for i.d she was just eager to get rid of any child and to whom whoever! then when i confronted them for not only having the employee give private info out but to also say how the lady watching kids tried to pawn them off.her own responce was that she dismissed "both" of them a while ago. i think i have a case. do I????

On the privacy issue, you only have a case if you have an order of protection (or PFA or whatever your state calls it) against your child's father and/or his mother. I don't know what state you're in, but in every state I've been in, the father has as much right to the child as the mother. As far as the dc trying to give you children that were not yours and not asking for ID, you shouldn't be using that dc anymore--I know I would have taken my kids and ran. That is a major issue and you have to wonder about the safety of your child in their care. I don't know if you have a case for a law suit, you'd have to ask a lawyer about that, but you definitely have cause to report the dc to DCS. I hope this works out for you--keep us posted.
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Old 08-21-2009, 07:39 AM
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Thumbs down I agree

Quote:
Originally Posted by ConcernedMotherof2 View Post
As a parent, I believe that SOME sort of explaination was due to this mother. If I were in this situation, I would not have taken my children back to this daycare. PERIOD.

There would be no need to give out confidential information in order to give an explaination to a parent. All that need be said is that a person (a child, a worker, a family member, the specifics are not necessary) was hurt or had an incident or SOMETHING. To completely refuse to give ANY information gives me the impression that they were at fault or negligent in some way. Children DO get abused and neglected at daycare... it's sad and nobody wants to think of it happening, but as a parent, this is what we are concerned about. Not only that, but this poor child was under the impression that there was a dead body at daycare. Why not give the mother a little bit of information so that she could explain it to the child at home and deal with any emotional issues?

This forum is making me a little ill--it really seems like it's parents against providers.

I agree that some explanation was due to the parent, and the reaction of the owner of the daycare was VERY uncalled for. You're right, it really does make it appear that the facility was at fault. I'm a mom and a provider, so this is coming from both sides.

When something happens in my daycare - a child is sick or injured or whatever - the parents are notified of the necessary information. Is the illness contagious, will the child be returning. I don't give specifics about which child it was, or anything confidential. Just what the parents need to know. They have the right to know! They're child MAY be at risk of catching something now. How is a parent supposed to know unless we tell them?

Personally, to the mom who wrote this, I think you're better off finding another daycare anyway, based solely on the responses you received.
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Old 01-31-2012, 08:09 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ConcernedMotherof2 View Post
On the privacy issue, you only have a case if you have an order of protection (or PFA or whatever your state calls it) against your child's father and/or his mother. I don't know what state you're in, but in every state I've been in, the father has as much right to the child as the mother. As far as the dc trying to give you children that were not yours and not asking for ID, you shouldn't be using that dc anymore--I know I would have taken my kids and ran. That is a major issue and you have to wonder about the safety of your child in their care. I don't know if you have a case for a law suit, you'd have to ask a lawyer about that, but you definitely have cause to report the dc to DCS. I hope this works out for you--keep us posted.
The father does have just as much right to the child as you do if there is no court order what so ever. The grandmother, however, does not. The worker does need to be punished and you need to talk to the social worker or the supervisor, or hell go higher. If they have a main office go there! Confidentiality is very important because they do not know if the individual picking up that child has or could harm the child. I do however think that you need to figure out what is going on in that situation for the health of your children. Just because you have a new boyfriend does not mean that they don't have a father. He deserves his children especially if he has been in their lives before!!!!!
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Old 01-31-2012, 01:03 PM
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You realize this thread is close to 3 years old, right?
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  #18  
Old 02-03-2012, 09:16 AM
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Originally Posted by mac60 View Post
VERY WELL SAID, I agree, some type of statement was warranted. I know I wouldn't take my child back until I knew some of the details, not names, but basic statement just so I knew it would be ok to return.
I agree. As a mother I would absolutely want some sort of explanation. Names aren't necessary maybe just someone fell or got hurt or maybe it was an asthma attack or something. I too would be worried that maybe this affected my child in some way, not only health wise. I can only imagine that seeing someone get hurt or have an attack or something bad enough to call 911 would have some sort of impact on my child and/or leave them with questions. I would expect some sort of explanation not only to ease my mind, but also to know how to handle the situation at home.
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Old 06-08-2017, 05:50 PM
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Angry

Yes, there could have been a damn standoff between an employee and the police. Wouldn't you want to know if your child was in a daycare such as this?? I would have busted in there. I
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Old 06-08-2017, 06:00 PM
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