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Old 02-07-2018, 06:44 AM
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Default Saying Look at me! All.Day.Long

I have a dcg4 who wants me to recognize and acknowledge e try single thing she does. ‘Look, I’m standing’, ‘look I’m feeding myself’. I don’t know how to reply without sounding rude. I keep saying ‘go play’. Today I asked her why she was showing me how she is standing, when I see he stand ALLday and she says ‘I don’t know, but look at me!’

Please give me ideas of what to say to get her to stop asking for acknowledgment of every single small task
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Old 02-07-2018, 06:49 AM
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Similar threads dealing with attention seeking behaviors
https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.p...ention+seeking
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Old 02-07-2018, 06:57 AM
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Thanks BC!
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Old 02-07-2018, 07:52 AM
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I have the "Miss lostmymarbles, l did it" kid. Allllllllll dang day long. I can relate and feel your pain.
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Old 02-07-2018, 08:25 AM
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I had a little girl that did that. Her name is Delilah. After about two weeks of me saying, "Hey, you know this isn't the Delilah show." , it stopped.
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Old 02-07-2018, 09:46 AM
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I always say “what do you think about what you did? Are you proud of yourself?”. Then I explain that it really doesn’t matter what I thought they should do things for themselves, they don’t need me to approve and look at them. I have no idea why but it actually worked. I probably said it a few times before it took.
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Old 02-07-2018, 11:40 AM
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I just say "Yep" or "You sure are ____(standing, walking, breathing)" in a dull voice without looking up. They stop bothering after a while.

For actual praise-able actions (completing work correctly, following complex directions, being extra kind, etc) I always praise enthusiastically to let them know that THIS is the type of thing you get praise/attention for.

I don't have praise junkies right now though - I have question-holics.

If I says its time to clean up, cue 8 voices "is it time to clean up?" "it's time to clean up??" "did you say its time to clean up?"

Along with just general "What are you doing? Why? Why are you wearing a sweater? What is he dong in the potty? Why did you cough?" ad nauseum all day, every kid. They don't even wait for the answer, they just ask another question.

It started just with a coping mechanism for my little anxiety-prone guy but now its a habit for all of them.
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Old 02-07-2018, 12:04 PM
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Extinction. I had a dcg like this, but maybe not quite as bad.
I still have the girl but she doesn't do it anymore. I had to just start not looking at her or hearing her. I still gave her +ve feedback, but more for behaviors that I valued in her and just a little bit for her performing arts.

My dcg is three years, since yours if four, maybe give her an explanation/warning that you can't always watch every single thing she does. Sometimes you have to watch other things. Then ease into the extinction and give reminders at times. I think the explanation and reminders help her know that you don't love her less, you just can't give as much attention as she's wanting.

Even better, as she gets older, explain that it can be annoying to lots of people, and she should just ask for attention a few times not all the time.
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