I Resigned From My Position and Feel Guilty. Advice?

[bunny]

Hi, this is my first time posting and I am new here.

I’ve been working at my current center for about nine months, and I put in my resignation on Friday. I feel guilty and would like some advice. I put in my notice because I feel like I was under-appreciated, wasn’t given enough training or help, and I was underpaid. I started at a co-teacher in the three’s classroom, and then during the start of COVID I moved to the infant room as the lead and only teacher. I was taking care of 4 infants with very little training beyond don’t let them die, while only making minimum wage. It took my resigning to even get my director to show more interest in my room, and now I have multiple coworkers telling me that I should stay, my director telling me to stay and suggesting going part time or taking a leave, and then she’s telling me the room might close because there’s no one they can find to replace me. All of this is making me feel really guilty for leaving and has me rethinking. Should I stay?

[Cat Herder]

Generally, training is your own responsibility. There are many training sites online. I use Pro-solutions, myself.

Child care is not like most professions with starting requirements unless you are opening your own. Many do require your obtaining a CDA, degree or TCC before the end of your first two years. It is also generally expected you do that on your own time and money.

Most child care workers are unappreciated and underpaid. It is sort of the expectation for our profession. Notice how they protected public school teachers by sending them home paid while asking us to take extra children, work longer hours and give parents discounts during COVID-19?

It really is just the field, entirely.

[e.j.]

I agree with everything CH said; she's definitely not wrong about child care providers being unappreciated and underpaid.

As far as your question, "Should I stay?"... I would say, "Only if you want to and only if you're doing it because it makes you happy - not out of a sense of guilt." The fact that they can't find a replacement and may have to close the infant room is not your problem or your responsibility. If you want to stay and a raise in pay would help you feel better about it, maybe now's the time to ask for more money. Otherwise, you have the right to walk away from a job that makes you unhappy and not feel guilty about it.

[Michael]

Welcome to the forum!

[AmyKidsCo]

Welcome!

I love Tom Copeland's Three Choices in Life. He writes about conflict with a parent, but they apply to almost every circumstance.

1) I am happy – Let the parent do whatever they want concerning the issue in dispute and be happy with it. Life is too short to worry about every problem you face.

2) I am not happy – Tell the parent what they must do to make you happy. If the parent refuses to follow your rules, end your agreement and let the parent go.

3) I quit – If you are unhappy and unable to confront the parent to resolve the conflict, go out of business. This work is too stressful for you and you will be better off doing a different job.

In your case the center would be the parent, so basically you 1. decide you're happy the way things are, 2. tell the center what needs to change so you will be happy and be prepared to quit if they don't agree, or 3. just quit and find another job.

[PB&J]

Originally Posted by AmyKidsCo

Welcome!

I love Tom Copeland's Three Choices in Life. He writes about conflict with a parent, but they apply to almost every circumstance.

1) I am happy – Let the parent do whatever they want concerning the issue in dispute and be happy with it. Life is too short to worry about every problem you face.

2) I am not happy – Tell the parent what they must do to make you happy. If the parent refuses to follow your rules, end your agreement and let the parent go.

3) I quit – If you are unhappy and unable to confront the parent to resolve the conflict, go out of business. This work is too stressful for you and you will be better off doing a different job.

In your case the center would be the parent, so basically you 1. decide you're happy the way things are, 2. tell the center what needs to change so you will be happy and be prepared to quit if they don't agree, or 3. just quit and find another job.

I am so glad you posted this. Thank you.

[Star’s Mommy]

Great advice!

[Daycareaid]

I just quit also, Friday was my last day. I worked with 2 and a half your olds who are horrific to just me. The teacher wasn't there and they set out to torture me even though I treat them so well and tried to make the day fun. As soon as someone else walked in the room they would stop what they were doing and act like angels without the person saying a word. I have never met such disrespectful children in my life. They are well behaved for the teacher its literally just me who they think its funny to be as bad as possible to. I've been in there since mid August so I've been there a few months. The teacher always told me I need to be more stern and don't give them options like "do you want me to put away the book or do you want to"? like I read what you are supposed to do so I am just dumbfounded. She kept telling me to yell with more of a bass in my voice and not be so sweet. I guess she was right because they treat her well and to me they think of as a joke. My own children listen to me so I just don't understand. I'm done working with other people's children.

[Michael]

Welcome to the forum. We are now at https://forum.daycare.com