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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Did I Do The Right Thing?
awestbrook713 03:31 PM 11-11-2011
Found out one of my families is going to leave me as soon as they find alternative care but how I found out isn't something I can tell her because I don't want my source to get into trouble.
So I have a family wanting to fill this position with the same schedule and will be the same money but heres the kicker grandma who was watching the child is leaving a week from this coming monday so mom was asking if I had the spot or not. Do I have it for sure no, until other mom tells me I won't count my chickens.
I did however txt mom and tell her the last few times we talked I got the definate feeling that she was going to decide to leave and that I know I had told her I would give her until december 1st but I currently have another family interested and I don't want to lose out if shes just gonna leave. I told her I want to watch her son if she wants me to but I also need to keep my spots filled since I am barely making it as it is in this business. I also told her I hope this txt doesn't upset her and that i hope she understands why I had to send it. I also told her to disregard it if my feeling was wrong.
Was I wrong in sending this txt, should I have just pasted on this other family and let things happen the way they should and have two slots unfilled? I have been holding this position for the baby for over 6 months and now for her to just use me for a few weeks while she looks for someone else just kinda bothers me and makes me feel if she can look out for herself then I should be able to look out for me.
Still waiting on answer from mom, my heart is beating so hard and I think my blood pressure is rising I don't like to have people mad at me but it seems to be my newest hobby.
So I have a family wanting to fill this position with the same schedule and will be the same money but heres the kicker grandma who was watching the child is leaving a week from this coming monday so mom was asking if I had the spot or not. Do I have it for sure no, until other mom tells me I won't count my chickens.
I did however txt mom and tell her the last few times we talked I got the definate feeling that she was going to decide to leave and that I know I had told her I would give her until december 1st but I currently have another family interested and I don't want to lose out if shes just gonna leave. I told her I want to watch her son if she wants me to but I also need to keep my spots filled since I am barely making it as it is in this business. I also told her I hope this txt doesn't upset her and that i hope she understands why I had to send it. I also told her to disregard it if my feeling was wrong.
Was I wrong in sending this txt, should I have just pasted on this other family and let things happen the way they should and have two slots unfilled? I have been holding this position for the baby for over 6 months and now for her to just use me for a few weeks while she looks for someone else just kinda bothers me and makes me feel if she can look out for herself then I should be able to look out for me.
Still waiting on answer from mom, my heart is beating so hard and I think my blood pressure is rising I don't like to have people mad at me but it seems to be my newest hobby.
Ariana 03:45 PM 11-11-2011
I personally don't text my clients. If I had an issue I'd address it face to face. However I think you need to honor your contract in this situation. What does your contract say?
I persoanlly wouldn't get mixed up in "drama" but it seems like that ship has already sailed with the text. She's not going to tell you if she doesn't want to tell you.
I persoanlly wouldn't get mixed up in "drama" but it seems like that ship has already sailed with the text. She's not going to tell you if she doesn't want to tell you.
youretooloud 06:19 PM 11-11-2011
I don't text either.
I'd have probably found out if this new mom is planning to keep bringing him, or if this is just temporary. If she was planning to stay, I'd have taken this new one, and let the temporary kid go.
When I get a "fill in, until I find the right place" kind of kids, they ALWAYS tell me, it's just for X amount of time until (insert reason) so I don't get offended by that, because I agree to do it for however many weeks or months they need it.
If I had someone who was just staying until something more convenient came up, I'd probably fill the spot and tell them "sorry".
I'd have probably found out if this new mom is planning to keep bringing him, or if this is just temporary. If she was planning to stay, I'd have taken this new one, and let the temporary kid go.
When I get a "fill in, until I find the right place" kind of kids, they ALWAYS tell me, it's just for X amount of time until (insert reason) so I don't get offended by that, because I agree to do it for however many weeks or months they need it.
If I had someone who was just staying until something more convenient came up, I'd probably fill the spot and tell them "sorry".
awestbrook713 05:30 AM 11-13-2011
I require two weeks notice according to my contract. I feel the txt I sent was completely drama free, it was just a question that I think any provider on here would want answered if they think they are going to be left. And also I feel she told my sister because she figured she would do her dirty work for her by telling me then she wouldn't feel as bad or hoped I would term her and make myself look bad. I haven't said I won't watch your child or do this or else, I am just asking her is something going on that I should know about. If she has definately decided to leave why can't she tell me so I can start looking with the understanding that my current family has the spot until they find new care. As long as she gives me the 2 week notice then I can give the new family two week notice and all should be right work out.
awestbrook713 05:33 AM 11-13-2011
oh and in addition I have held this spot open for her for over 6 months for no charge so for her to use me while she looks for new care just to leave me before my new rates kick in does get under my skin a bit. How can I not feel used.
This other family has wanted a spot for almost as long and I had to tell them I couldn't but now to find out I can but just not in time bothers me. I hate what ifs and I seem to be swimming in them.
This other family has wanted a spot for almost as long and I had to tell them I couldn't but now to find out I can but just not in time bothers me. I hate what ifs and I seem to be swimming in them.
jen 09:12 AM 11-13-2011
Originally Posted by awestbrook713:
Found out one of my families is going to leave me as soon as they find alternative care but how I found out isn't something I can tell her because I don't want my source to get into trouble.
So I have a family wanting to fill this position with the same schedule and will be the same money but heres the kicker grandma who was watching the child is leaving a week from this coming monday so mom was asking if I had the spot or not. Do I have it for sure no, until other mom tells me I won't count my chickens.
I did however txt mom and tell her the last few times we talked I got the definate feeling that she was going to decide to leave and that I know I had told her I would give her until december 1st but I currently have another family interested and I don't want to lose out if shes just gonna leave. I told her I want to watch her son if she wants me to but I also need to keep my spots filled since I am barely making it as it is in this business. I also told her I hope this txt doesn't upset her and that i hope she understands why I had to send it. I also told her to disregard it if my feeling was wrong.
Was I wrong in sending this txt, should I have just pasted on this other family and let things happen the way they should and have two slots unfilled? I have been holding this position for the baby for over 6 months and now for her to just use me for a few weeks while she looks for someone else just kinda bothers me and makes me feel if she can look out for herself then I should be able to look out for me.
Still waiting on answer from mom, my heart is beating so hard and I think my blood pressure is rising I don't like to have people mad at me but it seems to be my newest hobby.
I wouldn't say you were "wrong" for texting, but I think the situation would have been better handled face to face. Or, if you really are certain that she is leaving, you could simply have given her notice and taken on the other family. Found out one of my families is going to leave me as soon as they find alternative care but how I found out isn't something I can tell her because I don't want my source to get into trouble.
So I have a family wanting to fill this position with the same schedule and will be the same money but heres the kicker grandma who was watching the child is leaving a week from this coming monday so mom was asking if I had the spot or not. Do I have it for sure no, until other mom tells me I won't count my chickens.
I did however txt mom and tell her the last few times we talked I got the definate feeling that she was going to decide to leave and that I know I had told her I would give her until december 1st but I currently have another family interested and I don't want to lose out if shes just gonna leave. I told her I want to watch her son if she wants me to but I also need to keep my spots filled since I am barely making it as it is in this business. I also told her I hope this txt doesn't upset her and that i hope she understands why I had to send it. I also told her to disregard it if my feeling was wrong.
Was I wrong in sending this txt, should I have just pasted on this other family and let things happen the way they should and have two slots unfilled? I have been holding this position for the baby for over 6 months and now for her to just use me for a few weeks while she looks for someone else just kinda bothers me and makes me feel if she can look out for herself then I should be able to look out for me.
Still waiting on answer from mom, my heart is beating so hard and I think my blood pressure is rising I don't like to have people mad at me but it seems to be my newest hobby.
You mentioned that in her last few conversations you got the impression she was leaving? Is she unhappy with care? How were those situations resolved?
Ariana 12:06 PM 11-13-2011
Originally Posted by awestbrook713:
I require two weeks notice according to my contract. I feel the txt I sent was completely drama free, it was just a question that I think any provider on here would want answered if they think they are going to be left. And also I feel she told my sister because she figured she would do her dirty work for her by telling me then she wouldn't feel as bad or hoped I would term her and make myself look bad. I haven't said I won't watch your child or do this or else, I am just asking her is something going on that I should know about. If she has definately decided to leave why can't she tell me so I can start looking with the understanding that my current family has the spot until they find new care. As long as she gives me the 2 week notice then I can give the new family two week notice and all should be right work out.
I think the text in and of itself is what creates the drama not the question kwim? I feel that when you deal with people face to face they are much less likely to ignore you, lie to you and evade the question. She can do anything with this text and most likely she'll ignore it. If you asked her face to face and she acted all "weird" then you'd "know" your answer and have more information.I require two weeks notice according to my contract. I feel the txt I sent was completely drama free, it was just a question that I think any provider on here would want answered if they think they are going to be left. And also I feel she told my sister because she figured she would do her dirty work for her by telling me then she wouldn't feel as bad or hoped I would term her and make myself look bad. I haven't said I won't watch your child or do this or else, I am just asking her is something going on that I should know about. If she has definately decided to leave why can't she tell me so I can start looking with the understanding that my current family has the spot until they find new care. As long as she gives me the 2 week notice then I can give the new family two week notice and all should be right work out.
The person you're dealing with is not a rational person clearly. She is treating you with total disrespect that's why she's not going to tell you...she could care less about your business or handling this in a mature way. I'm sorry you're going through this but you need to confront the issue by asking her point blank face to face.
awestbrook713 12:34 PM 11-13-2011
Shes not unhappy with care, I am the first of many providers that have been able to handle her daughter. I originally started caring for her daughter before I was registered. Mom is very unorganized and before I was registered and as full as I am now she would call 5 minutes before her daughter was supposed to be here to cancel or tell me she was coming for a day she didn't normally come for. She has had two of her friends watch her daughter in the past and both had to tell her they couldn't do it any more. I watch their children and they tell me they don't know how I do it. I just say every kid is different and we have worked out our issues and now she is one of my best kids. I haven't watched the baby. I haven't watched the daughter since august but have held the spots (my own stupidity).
I will handle this face to face on tuesday since mom has decided to ignore the txt like it doesn't exist, but I will give her a chance when she gets here to acknowledge it. Maybe she just feels funny txting back to me and telling me she is going to leave.
Other mom that I have interested in this spot messaged me today on fb and told me her mom has decided to stay for the thanksgiving holiday but she will probably need someone by december. I told her I will let her know as soon as I know anything, thats all I can do at this moment.
At this point I would love my current mom to respect me enough to tell me shes not staying and start looking for alternate care asap if shes not already. I am afraid there may not be many people left for her to choose from. If I can't take on the other family I will be upset but I just can't bring myself to just term her.
I will handle this face to face on tuesday since mom has decided to ignore the txt like it doesn't exist, but I will give her a chance when she gets here to acknowledge it. Maybe she just feels funny txting back to me and telling me she is going to leave.
Other mom that I have interested in this spot messaged me today on fb and told me her mom has decided to stay for the thanksgiving holiday but she will probably need someone by december. I told her I will let her know as soon as I know anything, thats all I can do at this moment.
At this point I would love my current mom to respect me enough to tell me shes not staying and start looking for alternate care asap if shes not already. I am afraid there may not be many people left for her to choose from. If I can't take on the other family I will be upset but I just can't bring myself to just term her.