Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Contagious Separation Anxiety
Meyou 04:49 AM 05-22-2013
I have a couple of 2 year olds that are (IMO) manipulating their parents at dropoff. It doesn't happen every day or on a predictable pattern (like Mondays) which is why I think it's manipulation vs real separation anxiety.
Both children have parents that do the right thing...quick goodbye, tell them they'll be back etc etc and they leave quickly but both show visible signs of distress and I feel this may be prolonging this "stage".
So my first question is how do I put an end to this random screaming in the morning? Both children have been here for over a year and both recover INSTANTLY they know they haven't "won" and their parents have left. One even stops as she turns the corner to the playroom while Mom is still here. Hysterical screaming to nothing in 2 seconds flat.
My first thought was to talk to both sets of parents and put a plan in place that crying at the door means the parents pass off and leave right away. We tend to chat for 5 min each day.
My other problem is that two other children are now copying this behavior when they see it. I had 3 of them screaming this morning and 2 didn't have a parent here.
But once the first one started "Mommy, mommy, mommy" the other two did the same thing.
It's driving me a little bananas since it's obviously NOT separation anxiety but Nannyde's Bye Bye Outside method seems a little like overkill (this happens maybe one day per week) so I'm looking for options. lol
Both children have parents that do the right thing...quick goodbye, tell them they'll be back etc etc and they leave quickly but both show visible signs of distress and I feel this may be prolonging this "stage".
So my first question is how do I put an end to this random screaming in the morning? Both children have been here for over a year and both recover INSTANTLY they know they haven't "won" and their parents have left. One even stops as she turns the corner to the playroom while Mom is still here. Hysterical screaming to nothing in 2 seconds flat.
My first thought was to talk to both sets of parents and put a plan in place that crying at the door means the parents pass off and leave right away. We tend to chat for 5 min each day.
My other problem is that two other children are now copying this behavior when they see it. I had 3 of them screaming this morning and 2 didn't have a parent here.
But once the first one started "Mommy, mommy, mommy" the other two did the same thing.It's driving me a little bananas since it's obviously NOT separation anxiety but Nannyde's Bye Bye Outside method seems a little like overkill (this happens maybe one day per week) so I'm looking for options. lol
Cradle2crayons 04:55 AM 05-22-2013
Well it may be overkill with the two... But if you don't stop this you are going to end up with a whole house full of upset kids even if these offenders STOP doing this behavior.
Nip it in the bud now before it becomes a huge problem for either them or the other kids who feed off of them.
Why exactly is bye bye outside overkill?? They simply say their goodbyes outside and the kid comes in without the parent.
Which means more to you?? Chatting with the parents or a house full of crying kids every morning?? Lol
Nip it in the bud now before it becomes a huge problem for either them or the other kids who feed off of them.
Why exactly is bye bye outside overkill?? They simply say their goodbyes outside and the kid comes in without the parent.
Which means more to you?? Chatting with the parents or a house full of crying kids every morning?? Lol
coolconfidentme 05:48 AM 05-22-2013
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
Which means more to you?? Chatting with the parents or a house full of crying kids every morning?? Lol
This was my first thought. My second thought was it's been happening over a year?!? Why let it go that long?Which means more to you?? Chatting with the parents or a house full of crying kids every morning?? Lol
Meyou 08:02 AM 05-22-2013
Originally Posted by coolconfidentme:
This was my first thought. My second thought was it's been happening over a year?!? Why let it go that long?
This has only been happening for a few weeks. I was just pointing out both children had been here for a year so this was not a new place or routine. This was my first thought. My second thought was it's been happening over a year?!? Why let it go that long?
I think saying goodbye outside the house for one incident per week or so is overkill because we would have to change the entire structure of our "goodbye" routine for the whole daycare. They all arrive at about the same time so it would have to be for all the kids or it wouldn't work.
I can do that if I have to but I was looking for alternatives.
