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Parents and Guardians Forum>Am I Being Too Critical?
Unregistered 09:54 AM 05-18-2012
I need some advice from other parents and childcare providers about my situation.
My daughter recently started at a 5 star at-home daycare, after searching for the "perfect fit" for many months. However, she has only been there a couple of months and I've picked up on some things that are nagging at me, but I'm not sure if I'm being too critical.
My issue is, the front door to the school/classroom is always unlocked. Anyone can walk in and any child could walk out. On a couple of occasions I've seen some lo's trying to leave, but one of the teachers stopped them.
Second, the classroom is supposed to have 3 teachers and that is how it was when I toured and observed on multiple occasions. However, once my lo starting going there, on most days (90% of time when I drop off or pick up) there are only 2 teachers in the classroom.
Another issue I have is about their lack of supplies. My LO is potty trained but she still needs help wiping (especially after a BM). So, after she has a BW we use the flushable wipes to get her nice and clean. I told the owner this, and she said bring some in and we will use them. Well, after only a couple of days when I was at the school and was helping my LO in the bathroom I noticed all of her wipes were gone. I assumed they just used them on other kids (some of the kids are still in diapers) and would use others for her, which I was okay with. However, twice this week when I helped her go to the bathroom when I as dropping her off, they were completely out of all wipes. One of the teachers said they were planning to run to the store to get some, but I thought how can a daycare run out of wipes. They are a necessity.
They also never have Kleenex around, even though many of the kids have snooty noses. The teachers resort to using toilet paper. I noticed this during my daughter's first week at school, so I brought in 3 boxes of Kleenex, but even still they never had them out for the kids or teachers to use. Have no idea why. I had to ask to the teacher is they had some and she got one of the boxes I brought in out of the closet. I've also seen the teachers wipe kids noses and then not wash their hands. Maybe that is why there are so many snooty noses.
I know that no school is going to be perfect, but I'm wondering if these are things that I should be worried/concerned about or things that might be signs of bigger problems. There are some really positive aspects about the school too, so I'm trying to take everything into consideration.
Thanks for any advice!
My daughter recently started at a 5 star at-home daycare, after searching for the "perfect fit" for many months. However, she has only been there a couple of months and I've picked up on some things that are nagging at me, but I'm not sure if I'm being too critical.
My issue is, the front door to the school/classroom is always unlocked. Anyone can walk in and any child could walk out. On a couple of occasions I've seen some lo's trying to leave, but one of the teachers stopped them.
Second, the classroom is supposed to have 3 teachers and that is how it was when I toured and observed on multiple occasions. However, once my lo starting going there, on most days (90% of time when I drop off or pick up) there are only 2 teachers in the classroom.
Another issue I have is about their lack of supplies. My LO is potty trained but she still needs help wiping (especially after a BM). So, after she has a BW we use the flushable wipes to get her nice and clean. I told the owner this, and she said bring some in and we will use them. Well, after only a couple of days when I was at the school and was helping my LO in the bathroom I noticed all of her wipes were gone. I assumed they just used them on other kids (some of the kids are still in diapers) and would use others for her, which I was okay with. However, twice this week when I helped her go to the bathroom when I as dropping her off, they were completely out of all wipes. One of the teachers said they were planning to run to the store to get some, but I thought how can a daycare run out of wipes. They are a necessity.
They also never have Kleenex around, even though many of the kids have snooty noses. The teachers resort to using toilet paper. I noticed this during my daughter's first week at school, so I brought in 3 boxes of Kleenex, but even still they never had them out for the kids or teachers to use. Have no idea why. I had to ask to the teacher is they had some and she got one of the boxes I brought in out of the closet. I've also seen the teachers wipe kids noses and then not wash their hands. Maybe that is why there are so many snooty noses.
I know that no school is going to be perfect, but I'm wondering if these are things that I should be worried/concerned about or things that might be signs of bigger problems. There are some really positive aspects about the school too, so I'm trying to take everything into consideration.
Thanks for any advice!
Michael 10:12 AM 05-18-2012
Great post. Please consider registering.
butterflybaby 10:22 AM 05-18-2012
Sorry, I actually have registered, but didn't realize that I hadn't logged in before my post above.
Heidi 10:27 AM 05-18-2012
hmmmm...
I don't know what state you are in or what the process was for getting 5 stars, but that doesn't sound 5 star to me.
I would say in regard to the 2/3 teacher thing, maybe once some of the children leave, so does one teacher?
The other stuff is adding up in my mind to NOT being 5 star. Ok, so once running out of kleenex...fine. Running out of wipes?
That's kind of scary!
I personally do NOT wipe bumms. It's part of self-help to me, and once children are potty trained, I expect them to be self-sufficient. But, I would have explained my position, not made empty promises.
I don't know what state you are in or what the process was for getting 5 stars, but that doesn't sound 5 star to me.
I would say in regard to the 2/3 teacher thing, maybe once some of the children leave, so does one teacher?
The other stuff is adding up in my mind to NOT being 5 star. Ok, so once running out of kleenex...fine. Running out of wipes?
That's kind of scary!I personally do NOT wipe bumms. It's part of self-help to me, and once children are potty trained, I expect them to be self-sufficient. But, I would have explained my position, not made empty promises.
butterflybaby 11:05 AM 05-18-2012
I actually posted the original post but forgot to login.
Regarding the 2/3 teacher thing, it doesn't depend on the number of kids. I don't drop my lo off until after 9:00 and by that time all of the kids are already there and there are still only 2 teachers. I think the other (lead teacher/owner) gets in the classroom around 10 or 11 and then stays until the end of the day and the other 2 teachers leave sometime after nap. I'm not positive of exact time, but I know they aren't there when our lo is picked up. Instead, the owner's mother comes over to help out. That is also something that I was not aware of before my lo started. I was told that the mother helped out as a substitute when needed. But, she is there every afternoon.
Some good things about the school are they've had the same staff for more than 5 years, they have a really nice outside space and spend a lot of time outdoors, smallish group (12 kids) for a daycare, and my lo can stay with the same kids/teachers until she goes to kindy.
Regarding the 2/3 teacher thing, it doesn't depend on the number of kids. I don't drop my lo off until after 9:00 and by that time all of the kids are already there and there are still only 2 teachers. I think the other (lead teacher/owner) gets in the classroom around 10 or 11 and then stays until the end of the day and the other 2 teachers leave sometime after nap. I'm not positive of exact time, but I know they aren't there when our lo is picked up. Instead, the owner's mother comes over to help out. That is also something that I was not aware of before my lo started. I was told that the mother helped out as a substitute when needed. But, she is there every afternoon.
Some good things about the school are they've had the same staff for more than 5 years, they have a really nice outside space and spend a lot of time outdoors, smallish group (12 kids) for a daycare, and my lo can stay with the same kids/teachers until she goes to kindy.
Blackcat31 11:35 AM 05-18-2012
Originally Posted by butterflybaby:
Sorry, I actually have registered, but didn't realize that I hadn't logged in before my post above.
Welcome to the forum! Sorry, I actually have registered, but didn't realize that I hadn't logged in before my post above.
Your status has been upgraded so you can post freely
JustAMom 11:57 AM 05-18-2012
Have you tried voicing your concerns? Honestly, it doesn't matter if you're being too critical or not. What matters is that you are not happy with the care you're paying for. I learned the hard way that you have to go with your gut! People told me I was nuts for not being happy with our first daycare. But things just kept getting worse there and I am now SO happy that we switched and found a daycare that we love. You are right that no place is going to be perfect. I think you have to weigh the good and the bad and see what is most important to you.
cheerfuldom 07:16 PM 05-18-2012
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I need some advice from other parents and childcare providers about my situation.
My daughter recently started at a 5 star at-home daycare, after searching for the "perfect fit" for many months. However, she has only been there a couple of months and I've picked up on some things that are nagging at me, but I'm not sure if I'm being too critical.
My issue is, the front door to the school/classroom is always unlocked. Anyone can walk in and any child could walk out. On a couple of occasions I've seen some lo's trying to leave, but one of the teachers stopped them.
Second, the classroom is supposed to have 3 teachers and that is how it was when I toured and observed on multiple occasions. However, once my lo starting going there, on most days (90% of time when I drop off or pick up) there are only 2 teachers in the classroom.
Another issue I have is about their lack of supplies. My LO is potty trained but she still needs help wiping (especially after a BM). So, after she has a BW we use the flushable wipes to get her nice and clean. I told the owner this, and she said bring some in and we will use them. Well, after only a couple of days when I was at the school and was helping my LO in the bathroom I noticed all of her wipes were gone. I assumed they just used them on other kids (some of the kids are still in diapers) and would use others for her, which I was okay with. However, twice this week when I helped her go to the bathroom when I as dropping her off, they were completely out of all wipes. One of the teachers said they were planning to run to the store to get some, but I thought how can a daycare run out of wipes. They are a necessity.
They also never have Kleenex around, even though many of the kids have snooty noses. The teachers resort to using toilet paper. I noticed this during my daughter's first week at school, so I brought in 3 boxes of Kleenex, but even still they never had them out for the kids or teachers to use. Have no idea why. I had to ask to the teacher is they had some and she got one of the boxes I brought in out of the closet. I've also seen the teachers wipe kids noses and then not wash their hands. Maybe that is why there are so many snooty noses.
I know that no school is going to be perfect, but I'm wondering if these are things that I should be worried/concerned about or things that might be signs of bigger problems. There are some really positive aspects about the school too, so I'm trying to take everything into consideration.
Thanks for any advice!
I would absolutely voice your concerns. Sometimes daycares have very odd rules that the teachers have no control over. They might be regulated to always have an "open door policy" and are not allowed to put locks on the doors. The teachers may be coming and going when you are not there at drop off and pickup. Again, you can ask, but there might be simple explanation. Perhaps they are just under the ratio to have 3 teachers, perhaps the 3rd teacher is only used during mid day or to give the other breaks, something like that. As for the wipes, the best thing you can do is to teach your daughter how to clean herself, period. Doesn't matter if a daycare is 5 star, people run out of supplies and likewise, cannot keep track of one kids special flushable wipes. In this case, I think there is something you can do to solve this issue, teach your daughter to wipe thoroughly. As for Kleenex, there could be a good reason it is not out all the time. Thats probably because 99% of kids love to pull out tissue from boxes. And kids at daycare have runny noses. Its just the nature of a lot of young ones being together all the time. There is constantly something going around amongst the kids. The teachers should be cleaning appropriately but I would be surprised if you found any daycare where there wasnt a few runny noses at any given time. Now if there is constant nasty illnesses going on, I would absolutely have an issue with that. I need some advice from other parents and childcare providers about my situation.
My daughter recently started at a 5 star at-home daycare, after searching for the "perfect fit" for many months. However, she has only been there a couple of months and I've picked up on some things that are nagging at me, but I'm not sure if I'm being too critical.
My issue is, the front door to the school/classroom is always unlocked. Anyone can walk in and any child could walk out. On a couple of occasions I've seen some lo's trying to leave, but one of the teachers stopped them.
Second, the classroom is supposed to have 3 teachers and that is how it was when I toured and observed on multiple occasions. However, once my lo starting going there, on most days (90% of time when I drop off or pick up) there are only 2 teachers in the classroom.
Another issue I have is about their lack of supplies. My LO is potty trained but she still needs help wiping (especially after a BM). So, after she has a BW we use the flushable wipes to get her nice and clean. I told the owner this, and she said bring some in and we will use them. Well, after only a couple of days when I was at the school and was helping my LO in the bathroom I noticed all of her wipes were gone. I assumed they just used them on other kids (some of the kids are still in diapers) and would use others for her, which I was okay with. However, twice this week when I helped her go to the bathroom when I as dropping her off, they were completely out of all wipes. One of the teachers said they were planning to run to the store to get some, but I thought how can a daycare run out of wipes. They are a necessity.
They also never have Kleenex around, even though many of the kids have snooty noses. The teachers resort to using toilet paper. I noticed this during my daughter's first week at school, so I brought in 3 boxes of Kleenex, but even still they never had them out for the kids or teachers to use. Have no idea why. I had to ask to the teacher is they had some and she got one of the boxes I brought in out of the closet. I've also seen the teachers wipe kids noses and then not wash their hands. Maybe that is why there are so many snooty noses.
I know that no school is going to be perfect, but I'm wondering if these are things that I should be worried/concerned about or things that might be signs of bigger problems. There are some really positive aspects about the school too, so I'm trying to take everything into consideration.
Thanks for any advice!
There is nothing wrong with respectfully asking for clarification though. Its your right as a mom to feel comfortable with where your child is all day.
Countrygal 06:58 AM 05-19-2012
Originally Posted by Heidi:
hmmmm...
I don't know what state you are in or what the process was for getting 5 stars, but that doesn't sound 5 star to me.
I would say in regard to the 2/3 teacher thing, maybe once some of the children leave, so does one teacher?
The other stuff is adding up in my mind to NOT being 5 star. Ok, so once running out of kleenex...fine. Running out of wipes? That's kind of scary!
I personally do NOT wipe bumms. It's part of self-sufficient. But, I would have explained my position, not made empty promises.
These were my thoughts. For one thing, tissues are required in our state for certification. NOT toilet paper. Well, of course toilet paper is required, you know what I mean.... hmmmm...
I don't know what state you are in or what the process was for getting 5 stars, but that doesn't sound 5 star to me.
I would say in regard to the 2/3 teacher thing, maybe once some of the children leave, so does one teacher?
The other stuff is adding up in my mind to NOT being 5 star. Ok, so once running out of kleenex...fine. Running out of wipes?
That's kind of scary!I personally do NOT wipe bumms. It's part of self-sufficient. But, I would have explained my position, not made empty promises.
Short-staffed would be a big NO-NO IF they are above numbers. That's easy to tell - just look up your state regs. I was thinking perhaps one teacher quit and they are in the process of hiring....
Whatever the problems are, I would attempt to talk to the director in a friendly manner with the approach that you are basically happy there, but there are a few things that you have noticed that concern you greatly.... Maybe if they know someone is watching, they might be more regular about "picking up the wipes" and kleenex. I'm always one to go to the source and speak to them. That is always the first big step. Be honest about your concerns and approach it from the angle that you want to work them out to everyone's satisfaction.
Good luck!
butterflybaby 07:54 AM 05-19-2012
They are not technically over the state regs for ratio, but I picked this place because they owner told me that they have 12 kids and 3 teachers, 1 to 4 ratio. So, I feel like I was mislead.
This is an at-home daycare so the director is the owner and the lead teacher. So, she is actually the one that is not maintaining the ratio and not keeping up with supplies. I have voiced some other concerns to her, but afterwards I felt like I got the cold shoulder from the other teachers. I'm trying not to be labeled as "one of those parents".
I'm not concerned that my lo wipes were used, I'm concerned that they have run completely out of all wipes, even though they have kids who are in diapers. This is a mix age group (18months - 4 years). It just makes me think that if such a simple thing is neglected, what else might be.
Also, it bothers me that they said they would help her wipe, but don't seem to be doing that. My lo is 2 1/2. In my opinion, most kids that age can't wipe adequately after a BM and need some assistance until they have the ability to do so.
After being able to get all of this off my chest, I think I've come to the conclusion that I need to find somewhere else that I'm more comfortable with. Probably a very small home daycare or a SAHM who has a similar age child. A nanny would be great, but is out of my budget. My lo stayed home with my husband and I until she recently started school, so I think my expectations are a bit higher than some.
This is an at-home daycare so the director is the owner and the lead teacher. So, she is actually the one that is not maintaining the ratio and not keeping up with supplies. I have voiced some other concerns to her, but afterwards I felt like I got the cold shoulder from the other teachers. I'm trying not to be labeled as "one of those parents".
I'm not concerned that my lo wipes were used, I'm concerned that they have run completely out of all wipes, even though they have kids who are in diapers. This is a mix age group (18months - 4 years). It just makes me think that if such a simple thing is neglected, what else might be.
Also, it bothers me that they said they would help her wipe, but don't seem to be doing that. My lo is 2 1/2. In my opinion, most kids that age can't wipe adequately after a BM and need some assistance until they have the ability to do so.
After being able to get all of this off my chest, I think I've come to the conclusion that I need to find somewhere else that I'm more comfortable with. Probably a very small home daycare or a SAHM who has a similar age child. A nanny would be great, but is out of my budget. My lo stayed home with my husband and I until she recently started school, so I think my expectations are a bit higher than some.
Kaddidle Care 08:34 AM 05-19-2012
I agree that at 2 1/2 she needs help in that department. Many children are still in diapers at that age. And there are occasions where even 5 year olds need some assistance if they have an especially messy one. (Just helped one out this week myself because when I saw the state of the toilet after she went, I knew she was a mess.)
Running out of wipes - this does happen - especially when the parents are required to provide them. They should not be using your daughter's wipes unless they are in dire straights. I personally feel centers should keep at least one spare package at all times - just in case.
This does need to be discussed with the owner - especially the teacher/student ratio that was "sold" to you. It may very well be that one of the Teachers is ill - it happens.
I find the fact that the Teachers are blowing noses and not washing hands or at least using hand sanitizer totally unacceptable. This needs to be addressed immediately. At 2 1/2 the tissues don't need to be exactly at her reach, but available. Not locked in a closet. Yes, the littles sometimes go hog wild with tissues so sometimes we have to hand them to them.
The open/unlocked door policy is State to State. We participate in Safe Sanctuaries so our doors are locked on the outside but easily opened from inside.
As far as that place being 5 star - I would double check that. She may have told you that she is 5 star but I'd look it up.
Running out of wipes - this does happen - especially when the parents are required to provide them. They should not be using your daughter's wipes unless they are in dire straights. I personally feel centers should keep at least one spare package at all times - just in case.
This does need to be discussed with the owner - especially the teacher/student ratio that was "sold" to you. It may very well be that one of the Teachers is ill - it happens.
I find the fact that the Teachers are blowing noses and not washing hands or at least using hand sanitizer totally unacceptable. This needs to be addressed immediately. At 2 1/2 the tissues don't need to be exactly at her reach, but available. Not locked in a closet. Yes, the littles sometimes go hog wild with tissues so sometimes we have to hand them to them.
The open/unlocked door policy is State to State. We participate in Safe Sanctuaries so our doors are locked on the outside but easily opened from inside.
As far as that place being 5 star - I would double check that. She may have told you that she is 5 star but I'd look it up.
itlw8 10:18 AM 05-19-2012
unlocked door. well required in some places. with enough staff the children are supervised and will not escape.
no tissues.... what is wrong with TP it is the same stuff. as long as it is not the one hanging by the toilet and is a fresh roll.
Not washing hands that is a biggie.
Staff can only work 8 hours and then overtime is needed so staff usually oerlaps during the day
Out of wipes... everyone runs out of things and with extra staff they can go get some but I know of no rule requiring wipes. wet paper towels will do in a pinch.
None of these are issues that wold affect the star rating in my opinion.
Truthfully I would never use flushable wipes they clog the sewer.But I would tell the parent that.
If the rest of the program is great I would let them know you notice they do not wash after wiping noses and could they do that or wear gloves?
You will have a hard time finding a place that neer runs out of supplies at some time.
no tissues.... what is wrong with TP it is the same stuff. as long as it is not the one hanging by the toilet and is a fresh roll.
Not washing hands that is a biggie.
Staff can only work 8 hours and then overtime is needed so staff usually oerlaps during the day
Out of wipes... everyone runs out of things and with extra staff they can go get some but I know of no rule requiring wipes. wet paper towels will do in a pinch.
None of these are issues that wold affect the star rating in my opinion.
Truthfully I would never use flushable wipes they clog the sewer.But I would tell the parent that.
If the rest of the program is great I would let them know you notice they do not wash after wiping noses and could they do that or wear gloves?
You will have a hard time finding a place that neer runs out of supplies at some time.
abcdaycaremom 08:10 AM 07-23-2012
First of all in my opinion the so called star rating is a bunch of bull! In my state the star rating is s et up for more education which does not make your day care better. It only helps you become a preschool teacher or director. Education child development, education and experience is whats make a quality daycare. I am a licensed daycare provider for over 9 years I have a quality daycare and am sought after more then the 5 start daycare here. Picking a day care providers should come from common sense of what you expect for your child and your heart. You need to make a connection with your provider.
Regarding the wipes, these should be provided by the parents. So if you going through them then of course they are being used for everyone else's butts, hands, and face. Maybe start teaching your child to wipe better so you do not have to provide them. Kleenex , daycare doesn't wish to buy them, if they want to use toilet paper so be it. The point being missed is children walking around with running noses not what they use to wipe it.
Schedule of teacher count, if you feel that there should be more teachers ask to see there schedule and plann a staff to child ratios for the time period your child is there. Maybe at a different time of day they are coming in. But not every daycare at every hour needs to be over staffed.
And after all that if you feel something is not right contact the license agency and let them do a surprise inspection to see if the daycare is following regulations and safety standards. You do not have to give them your name either
Regarding the wipes, these should be provided by the parents. So if you going through them then of course they are being used for everyone else's butts, hands, and face. Maybe start teaching your child to wipe better so you do not have to provide them. Kleenex , daycare doesn't wish to buy them, if they want to use toilet paper so be it. The point being missed is children walking around with running noses not what they use to wipe it.
Schedule of teacher count, if you feel that there should be more teachers ask to see there schedule and plann a staff to child ratios for the time period your child is there. Maybe at a different time of day they are coming in. But not every daycare at every hour needs to be over staffed.
And after all that if you feel something is not right contact the license agency and let them do a surprise inspection to see if the daycare is following regulations and safety standards. You do not have to give them your name either
youretooloud 01:32 PM 07-23-2012
The unlocked door, and the two teachers wouldn't upset me really.
But, the complete lack of supplies would. Especially since there are no wipes. I have run out of wipes before too, and had to use paper towels or other things. You can bet I got myself to the store to buy more.
No tissues? I'd get myself to the store for that too. We NEED to keep tissues in nearly every room of the house.
The special toilet wipes, I think nobody really assumes they are just for one kid. Especially with that many kids. I would stop bringing those, and assume she will be fine with toilet paper. Having a soft wet wipey for her bum isn't really necessary, and obviously they got used up on everybody else.
But, the complete lack of supplies would. Especially since there are no wipes. I have run out of wipes before too, and had to use paper towels or other things. You can bet I got myself to the store to buy more.
No tissues? I'd get myself to the store for that too. We NEED to keep tissues in nearly every room of the house.
The special toilet wipes, I think nobody really assumes they are just for one kid. Especially with that many kids. I would stop bringing those, and assume she will be fine with toilet paper. Having a soft wet wipey for her bum isn't really necessary, and obviously they got used up on everybody else.
Heidi 06:26 AM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by abcdaycaremom:
First of all in my opinion the so called star rating is a bunch of bull! In my state the star rating is s et up for more education which does not make your day care better. It only helps you become a preschool teacher or director. Education child development, education and experience is whats make a quality daycare. I am a licensed daycare provider for over 9 years I have a quality daycare and am sought after more then the 5 start daycare here. Picking a day care providers should come from common sense of what you expect for your child and your heart. You need to make a connection with your provider.
Regarding the wipes, these should be provided by the parents. So if you going through them then of course they are being used for everyone else's butts, hands, and face. Maybe start teaching your child to wipe better so you do not have to provide them. Kleenex , daycare doesn't wish to buy them, if they want to use toilet paper so be it. The point being missed is children walking around with running noses not what they use to wipe it.
Schedule of teacher count, if you feel that there should be more teachers ask to see there schedule and plann a staff to child ratios for the time period your child is there. Maybe at a different time of day they are coming in. But not every daycare at every hour needs to be over staffed.
And after all that if you feel something is not right contact the license agency and let them do a surprise inspection to see if the daycare is following regulations and safety standards. You do not have to give them your name either
Welcome! I am in WI too, and I agree that while the principle of Youngstar may be fine, they've certainly got some bugs to work out!First of all in my opinion the so called star rating is a bunch of bull! In my state the star rating is s et up for more education which does not make your day care better. It only helps you become a preschool teacher or director. Education child development, education and experience is whats make a quality daycare. I am a licensed daycare provider for over 9 years I have a quality daycare and am sought after more then the 5 start daycare here. Picking a day care providers should come from common sense of what you expect for your child and your heart. You need to make a connection with your provider.
Regarding the wipes, these should be provided by the parents. So if you going through them then of course they are being used for everyone else's butts, hands, and face. Maybe start teaching your child to wipe better so you do not have to provide them. Kleenex , daycare doesn't wish to buy them, if they want to use toilet paper so be it. The point being missed is children walking around with running noses not what they use to wipe it.
Schedule of teacher count, if you feel that there should be more teachers ask to see there schedule and plann a staff to child ratios for the time period your child is there. Maybe at a different time of day they are coming in. But not every daycare at every hour needs to be over staffed.
And after all that if you feel something is not right contact the license agency and let them do a surprise inspection to see if the daycare is following regulations and safety standards. You do not have to give them your name either