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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Potential DCM Contacting Other Families on FB
mommyneedsadayoff 07:46 AM 07-28-2015
I interviewed a daycare mom last week and she seemed really nice and we talked for quite awhile. I offered her the spot and she said she would talk to her husband and let me know this week. I told her that if she would like my references, I could get her them, and she said that was nice, but she felt good about me and didn't need them. On Sunday, my current dcm texted me and said some woman named **** contacted her on FB to ask about how she likes me for daycare. I told her I had interviewed this mom, but she didn't have you name or contact info, so how did she know who you are? I guess we have mutual FB friends and she had recognized her son in a picture and messaged her. It is not that big of deal, but I felt kind of weird about it. I offered to give her contact info of my current and past families for references, but she didn't want it. If she had, I would have given my families a heads up that she may call to ask about their experience. Since she didn't want it, they got no heads up and didn't even know I was interviewing someone else. Dcm was fine with it and gave me a great review, but did say that the mom seemed a bit uptight Have you ever had potential clients facebook stalk someone to find info about you and should that make me weary of this mom?
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Baby Beluga 08:02 AM 07-28-2015
Originally Posted by mommyneedsadayoff:
I interviewed a daycare mom last week and she seemed really nice and we talked for quite awhile. I offered her the spot and she said she would talk to her husband and let me know this week. I told her that if she would like my references, I could get her them, and she said that was nice, but she felt good about me and didn't need them. On Sunday, my current dcm texted me and said some woman named **** contacted her on FB to ask about how she likes me for daycare. I told her I had interviewed this mom, but she didn't have you name or contact info, so how did she know who you are? I guess we have mutual FB friends and she had recognized her son in a picture and messaged her. It is not that big of deal, but I felt kind of weird about it. I offered to give her contact info of my current and past families for references, but she didn't want it. If she had, I would have given my families a heads up that she may call to ask about their experience. Since she didn't want it, they got no heads up and didn't even know I was interviewing someone else. Dcm was fine with it and gave me a great review, but did say that the mom seemed a bit uptight Have you ever had potential clients facebook stalk someone to find info about you and should that make me weary of this mom?
If she is contacting other families through FB prior to enrolling I think that is very good indicator that she is uptight...and possibly a little sneaky. I would be a little leery.
Now, if she said "Hey current DCM - I recognized we have a mutual friend and my child is enrolling in ABC daycare. I'm excited to get to know you!" That would be a little different, imo.
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crazydaycarelady 08:09 AM 07-28-2015
I think fb stalking is pretty common these days and her contacting dcm is not really any different than two aquaintances realizing they have a mutual interest and talking. She probably didn't want the references but when she realized she had a common friend just decided to ask. If you liked them otherwise I would'nt let this change your mind.
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Heidi 08:11 AM 07-28-2015
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
I think fb stalking is pretty common these days and her contacting dcm is not really any different than two aquaintances realizing they have a mutual interest and talking. She probably didn't want the references but when she realized she had a common friend just decided to ask. If you liked them otherwise I would'nt let this change your mind.


I agree.
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Unregistered 08:28 AM 07-28-2015
From a client perspective she is getting an honest opinion from another client. People don't ususally give prospective clients referrences if they know that that person is going to say something negative. As the daycare owner you pretty much know the people you use as references are going to say positive things. She probably is looking for random people that are your clients to hear the "truth".
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mommyneedsadayoff 09:38 AM 07-28-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
From a client perspective she is getting an honest opinion from another client. People don't usually give prospective clients references if they know that that person is going to say something negative. As the daycare owner you pretty much know the people you use as references are going to say positive things. She probably is looking for random people that are your clients to hear the "truth".
Thank you all for the input. I know it is more common to check people out on FB nowadays, but I guess it just threw me off a bit. My current dcm was fine with it, but sort of just like, "some random lady contacted me...what is going on?" They have mutual friends, but do not know each other. And I guess I don't see why she didn't want their contact info, yet still contacted them anyway through fb. I don't have a clue what people will say about me in private, but I imagine if they continue bringing their kid here, they must like me, so this was not a random person, but rather a person using my services for the last year. It's not a big deal, but just felt funny I guess.
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renodeb 10:16 AM 07-28-2015
Can't say that, that's happened to me (yet anyways). I always give references out to each prospective parent. Weather they call it's up to them. My dc parents know that there on my ref. list but I don't give a heads up. ( I asked tem if I could give there name and number out to prospective clients ahead of time. I guess it's not totally weird, after all places of employment check social media when they are looking to fill job openings. I guess you gotta be ready for anything in this field.
Deb
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Shell 10:24 AM 07-28-2015
I don't know, I guess it's ok. I've done the reverse and asked mutual friends if they know anything about a potential client.

Go with your gut. I had one dcm contact me and I can't quite explain it, but something felt off. I passed on the family- I just got this vibe that she was intense and would be a pita.

Anyway, about two years later, I found out this dcm is opening her own dc and parents are describing her as "weird" after the interview and passing. Guess my intuition was right?!

I would be watching for any other behaviors, but on its own, I think it's ok.
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e.j. 11:28 AM 07-28-2015
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
I think fb stalking is pretty common these days and her contacting dcm is not really any different than two aquaintances realizing they have a mutual interest and talking. She probably didn't want the references but when she realized she had a common friend just decided to ask. If you liked them otherwise I would'nt let this change your mind.
This is exactly what I was thinking. I just wouldn't have been able to phrase it as well as crazydclady did!
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284878 04:40 PM 07-29-2015
Ha ha something similar happened to me.
During the interview, they found out that we knew some of the same peoPle. They didn't ask for any references. But at church one guy that is friends with my dh, came to him and said, no worries I gave you a good reference. We were both surprised. The man had never meet me before and he gave my dh a good referance for my daycare. oh well, they signed
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