renlenfel 10:01 AM 01-14-2014
At drop off this morning DD told me that this Saturday was the DM's birthday. He asked me to do a craft with DG for a present. DG is 5 months old. I already did hand prints at Christmas. Does anyone have any ideas for a crafty gift I can make with a baby at short notice? I'll have to use what ever craft stuff I happen to have on hand.
Unregistered 10:03 AM 01-14-2014
Laurel 10:06 AM 01-14-2014
Originally Posted by renlenfel:
At drop off this morning DD told me that this Saturday was the DM's birthday. He asked me to do a craft with DG for a present. DG is 5 months old. I already did hand prints at Christmas. Does anyone have any ideas for a crafty gift I can make with a baby at short notice? I'll have to use what ever craft stuff I happen to have on hand.
Personally I wouldn't do it. That should be dad's job. But that is not what you asked. I can't think of anything really except more hand or foot prints.
Laurel
SilverSabre25 10:06 AM 01-14-2014
I would say, ""Um....no, sorry, that's your job."
or "If I do that for one, I have to do it for all and that's not something i'm going to take on."
or laugh at him and tell him it's a funny joke.
or just smile and say, "I think it would be more meaningful coming from you"
renlenfel 10:06 AM 01-14-2014
Oh thank you! I like the foot print butterfly.
Blackcat31 10:07 AM 01-14-2014
Originally Posted by renlenfel:
At drop off this morning DD told me that this Saturday was the DM's birthday. He asked me to do a craft with DG for a present. DG is 5 months old. I already did hand prints at Christmas. Does anyone have any ideas for a crafty gift I can make with a baby at short notice? I'll have to use what ever craft stuff I happen to have on hand.
Ok, I'm sorry I don't mean to be cynical or unfeeling but I would be really offended if a parent asked me to do something like that.
Why doesn't that dad do or make something WITH his child for the mom?
To place that responsibility on you is asking above and beyond and not something I would agree to.
I'm sure a heartfelt craft that dad did WITH his child would mean so much more than something made while at daycare....kwim?
TheGoodLife 10:08 AM 01-14-2014
Honestly, I wouldn't do it- Id let DCD know that you probably won't have time to add that in, but you can give him some ideas for things he can do at home himself. Why should be assume YOU need to do it? I think that's a little overboard!
littlemissmuffet 10:19 AM 01-14-2014
Also wouldn't do it. F that. Totally, absolutely, unequivocally not your responsibility - and completely outrageous that he even asked.
caregiver 10:32 AM 01-14-2014
Originally Posted by Mama2Bella:
Honestly, I wouldn't do it- Id let DCD know that you probably won't have time to add that in, but you can give him some ideas for things he can do at home himself. Why should be assume YOU need to do it? I think that's a little overboard!
I totally agree, it is a lot of nerve to ask you to do this and yes, it is the dad's job,not yours! The child is only 5 months old for heavens sake, why does he need you to do a craft with a child that young anyway.
Josiegirl 10:33 AM 01-14-2014
I would probably feel 'put out' as soon as dcd asked me but really, how long does it take to make a quick craft? Dcd probably feels inadequate as far as doing a craft with a 5 month old. There are still dads out there that get nervous just holding a baby. OP has showed her true crafty colors by already doing some at Christmas.
I can see why dcd would ask...never hurts to ask, right? By the way, that butterfly page is adorable. Any one of those projects is going to be a winner!
Oh, come on.... give him (and OP) a break.
He's probably just a clueless new dad. He saw that she had the kids do a craft for Christmas, and thought it would be cool to give something similar to mom for her birthday. He probably didn't come in
demanding her to make one, he probably just assumes that that's the kind of stuff that goes on in daycares. (That's the clueless part lol). I'm sure it was just conversation saying something like, "Hey, Wifey's birthday is coming up. If you're gonna do something like those handprint thingies you did for Christmas, could you set it aside for me? That would be an awesome gift for her".
I could easily see several of the dads I've dealt with saying that. Now, it wouldn't make it any easier for me to WANT to do it!!! I'd probably be rolling my eyes behind his back! I might even drop strong hints that we might not have time to do it, or maybe I'd say "oh, that was just a one-time thing for Christmas", but I certainly wouldn't think badly of him for asking. Guys just don't have a clue when it comes to Daycare, or gifts, or appropriateness of what to ask for, or much of anything to be quite honest!!! Especially if he's a young guy and this is his first kid.
Blackcat31 11:02 AM 01-14-2014
Originally Posted by Lucy:
Oh, come on.... give him (and OP) a break.
He's probably just a clueless new dad. He saw that she had the kids do a craft for Christmas, and thought it would be cool to give something similar to mom for her birthday. He probably didn't come in demanding her to make one, he probably just assumes that that's the kind of stuff that goes on in daycares. (That's the clueless part lol). I'm sure it was just conversation saying something like, "Hey, Wifey's birthday is coming up. If you're gonna do something like those handprint thingies you did for Christmas, could you set it aside for me? That would be an awesome gift for her".
I could easily see several of the dads I've dealt with saying that. Now, it wouldn't make it any easier for me to WANT to do it!!! I'd probably be rolling my eyes behind his back! I might even drop strong hints that we might not have time to do it, or maybe I'd say "oh, that was just a one-time thing for Christmas", but I certainly wouldn't think badly of him for asking. Guys just don't have a clue when it comes to Daycare, or gifts, or appropriateness of what to ask for, or much of anything to be quite honest!!! Especially if he's a young guy and this is his first kid.
....and THAT is EXACTLY why some dad's don't have a clue.
Because too many times women and mothers simply excuse their behavior as them "just not knowing any better".
Well, it's high time this dad learn what DOES happen at daycare and what is a parental duty and what can be sloughed on to the daycare provider.
I would NOT be rude about it but I would make darn sure he understood what I am saying.
It's the 21st century......Dads are EQUAL parents now days. I treat them as such.
(Lucy~ I don't mean this toward you personally...... just commenting on the words.
)
MotherNature 11:04 AM 01-14-2014
yup, wouldn't do it either. Maybe if she's your only kid... It's not your responsibility to make mom a gift.
Childminder 01:54 PM 01-14-2014
Op, if it doesn't matter to you go for it! I would be doing something with them anyway with the kid just make it a little more special than usual. The butterfly is nice or I like the heart with hands. Go on Pinterest and do a search for infant crafts or hand prints. If you do the print thing put it on paper and hand it to dad and suggest he take it from there by getting a frame or something.
AcornMama 02:29 PM 01-14-2014
If it were me, I'd probably keep it friendly with dcd but say something like, "You know, I try to make sure I remember each kiddo's birthday with a little something. There's no way I can keep up with all the parents' birthdays as well."
Because little requests just seem like little requests, until you multiply them out by everybody.
Meeko 03:35 PM 01-14-2014
I would bite my tongue and politely say no.
His request this time, will be an EXPECTATION the same time next year if they are still with you and as soon as other parents see it or get wind of it, you could be swamped with similar requests. You could end up doing crafts for birthdays, anniversaries...etc.
Once you start doing special....the requests become expectations and it becomes even more difficult to say no.
Naptime yet? 04:08 PM 01-14-2014
My first thought was maybe mom was around all the time, so dad couldn't sneak the craft in. Then I thought, maybe dad asked op because we're "experts" at this kind of stuff & could do it better than him. Then I remembered how hard it can be to do arts/crafts with infants & dad was intimidated (hence asking op to do it).
If you want to help, help, if not, don't.
blandino 05:18 PM 01-14-2014
I actually get offended with questions like that. I always say something like "Oh yes, in between caring for 12 children, changing diapers, executing activities, cleaning, cooking & serving meals for 12 children - I think it just might be easier for you to find time for it at home".
It always bugs me... Let me ask you, who is caring for multiple children, to do something that I can't do when I am at home caring for 1. I have a DCG who eats special food and her parents will send the chicken breast whole. So in addition to making the 11 meals for the other children, I need to stop and dice the chicken breast for your daughter - because you didn't want to take the two minutes to do it this morning. By all means, pass the buck.
Sorry, but that is a serious pet peeve of mine.