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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Hit and Run.... I'm Shocked!
SunshineMama 06:24 AM 10-19-2012
Apparently yesterday, dcm of a new part timer who has been coming for the past 3-4 weeks was in such a hurry to get home that she rear ended the mirror of one of my other dcp's cars on her way out of the driveway....and then just kept on driving!
I'm very surprised and would never have ever thought that would happen (she seems like a very nice and kind person)- the only thing I can think of is that she hit it with her van and didn't realize it??? Although, I am unsure how someone can knock off someone's whole mirror and not notice.
What am I supposed to do? Am I even allowed to give out contact information to the victim (any privacy issues)? They are being really nice about it and said they will just probably replace it, but I don't think that is very fair to them to have to pay for a new car part. I just don't know what to do.
I talked to a family member who said its none of my business and its between them, I just don't know. Thoughts?
I'm very surprised and would never have ever thought that would happen (she seems like a very nice and kind person)- the only thing I can think of is that she hit it with her van and didn't realize it??? Although, I am unsure how someone can knock off someone's whole mirror and not notice.
What am I supposed to do? Am I even allowed to give out contact information to the victim (any privacy issues)? They are being really nice about it and said they will just probably replace it, but I don't think that is very fair to them to have to pay for a new car part. I just don't know what to do.
I talked to a family member who said its none of my business and its between them, I just don't know. Thoughts?
EchoMom 06:39 AM 10-19-2012
Unfortunately this kind of think happens all the time. If it had been in a parking lot or street no one would know. Too bad for her she got caught because you saw it and you know the parties involved. That's tough... I don't know what I'd do either!
I'd like to say I'd talk to the offender and say I'm sorry but I saw the accident you had and I know you didnt' mean it, but I saw and I think you need to offer to pay for the repair. However, I agree that would be hard to do...
It just seems that especially since these parents have kids in your daycare together, they hsould really be respectful of one another...
I'm sure she probably just doesn't want anyone to be mad at her, and I'm sure like everyone else she'd say money's tight and is worried about insurance or having to pay for it.
I'd like to say I'd talk to the offender and say I'm sorry but I saw the accident you had and I know you didnt' mean it, but I saw and I think you need to offer to pay for the repair. However, I agree that would be hard to do...
It just seems that especially since these parents have kids in your daycare together, they hsould really be respectful of one another...
I'm sure she probably just doesn't want anyone to be mad at her, and I'm sure like everyone else she'd say money's tight and is worried about insurance or having to pay for it.
SunshineMama 06:53 AM 10-19-2012
Originally Posted by glenechogirl:
Unfortunately this kind of think happens all the time. If it had been in a parking lot or street no one would know. Too bad for her she got caught because you saw it and you know the parties involved. That's tough... I don't know what I'd do either!
I'd like to say I'd talk to the offender and say I'm sorry but I saw the accident you had and I know you didnt' mean it, but I saw and I think you need to offer to pay for the repair. However, I agree that would be hard to do...
It just seems that especially since these parents have kids in your daycare together, they hsould really be respectful of one another...
I'm sure she probably just doesn't want anyone to be mad at her, and I'm sure like everyone else she'd say money's tight and is worried about insurance or having to pay for it.
I was not the one who saw it- the next day, dcm came in and asked if p/t dcg came every day and I said no, and then she told me what happened. I told dcm that I have no problem sending an e-mail to her. I really want to give the p/t dcm the benefit of the doubt- but on the other side, I dont want a client who would knowingly hit another persons car in my driveway and just drive away. That's just bad character. ughUnfortunately this kind of think happens all the time. If it had been in a parking lot or street no one would know. Too bad for her she got caught because you saw it and you know the parties involved. That's tough... I don't know what I'd do either!
I'd like to say I'd talk to the offender and say I'm sorry but I saw the accident you had and I know you didnt' mean it, but I saw and I think you need to offer to pay for the repair. However, I agree that would be hard to do...
It just seems that especially since these parents have kids in your daycare together, they hsould really be respectful of one another...
I'm sure she probably just doesn't want anyone to be mad at her, and I'm sure like everyone else she'd say money's tight and is worried about insurance or having to pay for it.
Blackcat31 06:54 AM 10-19-2012
Last winter one of my daycare moms ran into my garage! Knocked the garage door right in and off it's track.
I have a video camera and saw her do it. I was kind of shocked but was even more shocked that when she came in to drop off her child, she never said anything about it!
I didn't say anything to her at the time because honestly, I was seriously shocked!!! I told my DH later when he came in at lunch time and he went out and surveyed the damage....which was more than I originally thought as she not only caved the door in but ruined the entire metal track it goes up and down on AND pushed the garage off its foundation!
There was NO WAY she didn't realize she hit the garage. (Plus her DS-age 4 told me they did) I think she just figured no one would say anything...I dunno her reasons.
I did say something to her and told her I saw the whole thing. I didn't expect her to pay for any of the damages (garage was already slated to be replaced) but wanted her to undrstand that I was most upset by the fact that she just didn't say anything. That is just respectful, honest and the right thing to do....kwim?
~ SunshineMama, I think you need to say something to her because if she truly didn't realize she hit another car, then she isn;t a very observant driver and what if it was a child instead?!
I also wonder about the effect this could have on you since the accident happened on your property. I wonder how responsible they could potentially hold you?
I disagree with your family member and feel this is your business and you do have an obligation to say something.
I have a video camera and saw her do it. I was kind of shocked but was even more shocked that when she came in to drop off her child, she never said anything about it!
I didn't say anything to her at the time because honestly, I was seriously shocked!!! I told my DH later when he came in at lunch time and he went out and surveyed the damage....which was more than I originally thought as she not only caved the door in but ruined the entire metal track it goes up and down on AND pushed the garage off its foundation!
There was NO WAY she didn't realize she hit the garage. (Plus her DS-age 4 told me they did) I think she just figured no one would say anything...I dunno her reasons.
I did say something to her and told her I saw the whole thing. I didn't expect her to pay for any of the damages (garage was already slated to be replaced) but wanted her to undrstand that I was most upset by the fact that she just didn't say anything. That is just respectful, honest and the right thing to do....kwim?
~ SunshineMama, I think you need to say something to her because if she truly didn't realize she hit another car, then she isn;t a very observant driver and what if it was a child instead?!
I also wonder about the effect this could have on you since the accident happened on your property. I wonder how responsible they could potentially hold you?
I disagree with your family member and feel this is your business and you do have an obligation to say something.
Willow 07:05 AM 10-19-2012
It happened in your driveway, on your property, so of course it's your business.
I'd have an issue with the character thing too.....
I'd definitely say something, but in person not in email so I could gauge her reaction as opposed to letting her think up a response. If she admitted she knew about it and just said nothing at the time I'd probably terminate. If she genuinely didn't know (which, yikes if that's the case) then I'd expect her to make it right.
I'd ask her to consider how she would feel if she were in the other dcf's shoes, and how she would expect you to respond if it was her car that was damaged and the other parent choose to just drive off.
I'd have an issue with the character thing too.....
I'd definitely say something, but in person not in email so I could gauge her reaction as opposed to letting her think up a response. If she admitted she knew about it and just said nothing at the time I'd probably terminate. If she genuinely didn't know (which, yikes if that's the case) then I'd expect her to make it right.
I'd ask her to consider how she would feel if she were in the other dcf's shoes, and how she would expect you to respond if it was her car that was damaged and the other parent choose to just drive off.
SunshineMama 07:10 AM 10-19-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Last winter one of my daycare moms ran into my garage! Knocked the garage door right in and off it's track.
I have a video camera and saw her do it. I was kind of shocked but was even more shocked that when she came in to drop off her child, she never said anything about it!
I didn't say anything to her at the time because honestly, I was seriously shocked!!! I told my DH later when he came in at lunch time and he went out and surveyed the damage....which was more than I originally thought as she not only caved the door in but ruined the entire metal track it goes up and down on AND pushed the garage off its foundation!
There was NO WAY she didn't realize she hit the garage. (Plus her DS-age 4 told me they did) I think she just figured no one would say anything...I dunno her reasons.
I did say something to her and told her I saw the whole thing. I didn't expect her to pay for any of the damages (garage was already slated to be replaced) but wanted her to undrstand that I was most upset by the fact that she just didn't say anything. That is just respectful, honest and the right thing to do....kwim?
~ SunshineMama, I think you need to say something to her because if she truly didn't realize she hit another car, then she isn;t a very observant driver and what if it was a child instead?!
I also wonder about the effect this could have on you since the accident happened on your property. I wonder how responsible they could potentially hold you?
I disagree with your family member and feel this is your business and you do have an obligation to say something.
That is an excellent point about safe driving- there are several children in my neighborhood and they always play outside. I am also concerned about the liability factor. Do you think I should send an e-mail so I have something in writing? I'm not even sure how to phrase it.... Maybe,Last winter one of my daycare moms ran into my garage! Knocked the garage door right in and off it's track.
I have a video camera and saw her do it. I was kind of shocked but was even more shocked that when she came in to drop off her child, she never said anything about it!
I didn't say anything to her at the time because honestly, I was seriously shocked!!! I told my DH later when he came in at lunch time and he went out and surveyed the damage....which was more than I originally thought as she not only caved the door in but ruined the entire metal track it goes up and down on AND pushed the garage off its foundation!
There was NO WAY she didn't realize she hit the garage. (Plus her DS-age 4 told me they did) I think she just figured no one would say anything...I dunno her reasons.
I did say something to her and told her I saw the whole thing. I didn't expect her to pay for any of the damages (garage was already slated to be replaced) but wanted her to undrstand that I was most upset by the fact that she just didn't say anything. That is just respectful, honest and the right thing to do....kwim?
~ SunshineMama, I think you need to say something to her because if she truly didn't realize she hit another car, then she isn;t a very observant driver and what if it was a child instead?!
I also wonder about the effect this could have on you since the accident happened on your property. I wonder how responsible they could potentially hold you?
I disagree with your family member and feel this is your business and you do have an obligation to say something.
It was brought to my attention this morning that when you were backing out of my driveway yeaterday at pick up, your van accidentally damaged ___'s mirror on your way out.
(I don't know what else to say......)
SunshineMama 09:06 AM 10-19-2012
can someone help me with the wording on my email to the mom who hit the other moms car?
After talking to my husband, he agreed that she should not get away with that, and its not fair to the other party.
After talking to my husband, he agreed that she should not get away with that, and its not fair to the other party.
Blackcat31 09:29 AM 10-19-2012
Dear DCM
It has recently come to my attention that there was an incident involving your car and another daycare family's car at drop off yesterday.
I realize this may have been an oversight on your part but the family who had their car damamaged will need to have the repair costs taken care of.
When you have some time to discuss this, could you please contact me so that we can get this matter solved.
Thank you
Daycare provider
I realize this doesn't say everything but I think it opens the door to the discussion and one I think you should have verbally with the parent.
It has recently come to my attention that there was an incident involving your car and another daycare family's car at drop off yesterday.
I realize this may have been an oversight on your part but the family who had their car damamaged will need to have the repair costs taken care of.
When you have some time to discuss this, could you please contact me so that we can get this matter solved.
Thank you
Daycare provider
I realize this doesn't say everything but I think it opens the door to the discussion and one I think you should have verbally with the parent.
littlemissmuffet 10:17 AM 10-19-2012
I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
melissa ann 10:54 AM 10-19-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
I agree. I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
EntropyControlSpecialist 10:57 AM 10-19-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
So true! I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
Blackcat31 11:00 AM 10-19-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
I guess I was responding as if the OP already knew it happened not necesarily IF the DCM did it or not. I would actually say something in person, not in email. Gives her too much time to make up a response to get out of being responsible for this. If you confront her in person you'll have a better chance of seeing if she's telling the truth or not.
If you aren't sure and are only speculating, then I too, would talk with them in person.
littlemissmuffet 11:42 AM 10-19-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I guess I was responding as if the OP already knew it happened not necesarily IF the DCM did it or not.
If you aren't sure and are only speculating, then I too, would talk with them in person.
I thought about that too. And I think that the parent would be even more inclined to lie/deny if she was told that someone saw her... she'd likely be so much more embarassed that someone saw her hit the other car and her not stop to check things out! There are so many cases where there is a witness to something like this and the person responsible will continue lying because they feel that's a better option than admitting to doing something run AND trying to hide it.I guess I was responding as if the OP already knew it happened not necesarily IF the DCM did it or not.
If you aren't sure and are only speculating, then I too, would talk with them in person.