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CraftyMom 06:52 AM 03-19-2014
Anyone else not take siblings? I have a set of siblings leaving this week, after that I have no interest in taking on siblings. From my experience they act up more with each other, tease other and are less likely to follow rules. The worst part is the financial strain when they leave! It can be hard to fill one spot, never mind two at once.
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Blackcat31 06:56 AM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by CraftyMom:
Anyone else not take siblings? I have a set of siblings leaving this week, after that I have no interest in taking on siblings. From my experience they act up more with each other, tease other and are less likely to follow rules. The worst part is the financial strain when they leave! It can be hard to fill one spot, never mind two at once.
I don't mind siblings.

Most of mine are spread apart enough in age that they rarely play together.
I also make great effort to keep them separated.

As for leaving and having to fill such a large opening, I require 2 weeks notice PER child. That way I have enough time to fill multiple spaces and it isn't such a shock to my budget.
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Cat Herder 07:07 AM 03-19-2014
I understand the risks but actually prefer sibling groups.

Most of my clients sign on with their first infant and continue to have more here. So far all of my "sibling" families stopped after 2-3 kids and averaged 7 years with me.

It can get complicated when 2-3 moms are pregnant at the same time so I go with a "first born is offered first slot" policy.

Truth be told, I have more drama from my singleton (by choice) families. It is hard to have a meeting of the minds (for daily care issues) with someone who feels they should give one child a "better life" by not having any more. The transition the kid faces when they then put them in group care , where I have to teach that same child that they are no more special than any other here, can be quite difficult. I won't even go into the "special" parent requests.

Please, Don't get me wrong, I respect the heck out of someone knowing their limitations, financial and emotional. I wish more people put that much thought into their family planning. I am trying to make the point that both groups present their own challenges. I may have done a poor job of it though...
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CraftyMom 07:18 AM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:

Truth be told, I have more drama from my singleton (by choice) families. It is hard to have a meeting of the minds (for daily care issues) with someone who feels they should give one child a "better life" by not having any more. The transition the kid faces when they then put them in group care , where I have to teach that same child that they are no more special than any other here, can be quite difficult. I won't even go into the "special" parent requests.
Maybe I've just had some difficult ones.

My siblings that are leaving this week have had the most "special" requests I've ever experienced. I'm pretty sure they are getting a nanny which is honestly what they need with all their "treat my kids better than the others" requests (in so many words)

I think the fact that these children are so "special" in the parents' eyes is the reason for the children not following rules here, etc.

My other sibling dcks have been very close in age and argued constantly. It probably makes a huge difference if they are a couple years apart.

Right now I have no interest in siblings lol Maybe in the future with the right family
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CraftyMom 07:21 AM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:

As for leaving and having to fill such a large opening, I require 2 weeks notice PER child. That way I have enough time to fill multiple spaces and it isn't such a shock to my budget.
I thought about doing this, but wasn't sure if it would be fair since it would be a month's notice really. Something to keep in mind in the future
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Blackcat31 07:34 AM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:

Truth be told, I have more drama from my singleton (by choice) families. It is hard to have a meeting of the minds (for daily care issues) with someone who feels they should give one child a "better life" by not having any more.
On a related note....my youngest brother (he is baby of the family.....he is VERY spoiled) and his wife have one child.

They are choosing to NOT have anymore children because they do not believe it would be possible to love another child in the same way they love the current one.

I keep teasing my brother and telling him that according to that theory, our parents must not have loved him at all then since he is the youngest of 6....

Originally Posted by CraftyMom:
I thought about doing this, but wasn't sure if it would be fair since it would be a month's notice really. Something to keep in mind in the future
People (both parents and providers) need to stop getting stuck in the notion that siblings or multiple kids means "special" or discount in some way....

YOU, as the provider do not care for the sibling groups you get as 1 or even 1.5 children. You treat them as an individual so the line of thinking that multiples are some sort of disability or unique characteristic is really not applicable.

I think MORE providers need to educate families about this concept so that this issue isn't an issue for providers. Sometimes parents need to be the ones who suck up the slack for these "special circumstances". KWIM?
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Tags:sibling discount, sibling discounts, siblings, unreasonable parental expectations
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