Do you start cooking dinner for your own family before all of your dck's leave? My last one doesn't leave until 6 and if I don't start cooking until after she leaves we won't have dinner until almost 7:30 some nights. I can easily supervise from the kitchen, but dcm has started making some backhand comments so I wanted to see if any of you thought it was a bad idea to be cooking when mom comes for pick up.

Reply

When my boys were much younger, I was experiencing what I called "The Witching Hour." It was that period of time after the last child left at 5:30, I was trying to get dinner on the table, and they were hungry for both food and my attention at the same time. It was an awful time of day, and was actually making me wonder if the whole daycare thing was worth it. If I tried to get a head start on our meal, I would get a few snippy comments from a dcm, even though my kitchen is right off the playroom (and what do they think we do to prepare meals and snacks for daycare).

I fixed the problem by announcing that my daycare's "official closing time" was 4:30. Pick-ups can happen anytime until 5:30 before late charges apply, and understand that this last hour of the day is a total free play time. No structured or directional play at all. Babies will be in a play yard, exersaucer, seat, whatever. None of my dcfs had a beef with it, and it's still cool now about 8 years later. It saved my sanity!

Reply

Oh by all means.... Cook away. As long as the child is being supervised I see no problem with it and do it myself. If mom has anything specific to say about you doing this with her child there .. ask her how she thinks you do it at lunch time?

Reply

What time is this mom picking up? Is her issue the supervision or more related to dinner itself?

I see nothing wrong with starting dinner for your own family when you still have DCK's present. It's a HOME daycare so it seems to me like it would be expected or at the very least acceptable.

Personally, because I don't live I my daycare home I don't have this issue but if I did have daycare in my home, I would absolutely start dinner at a certain time regardless of who was present.

Reply

Most of my dck's leave at 4:30 ish, but one stays until 5:15. I absolutely start dinner then. She often sits in a booster nearby and "helps" me, or colors. Because it's only her and she can be somewhat of a cling-on anyway, it has helped both of us stay sane.

When I had more kiddos, it depended on the mix of kids. As long as everyone is relatively content, I see no issue with it. Like BC said, it' HOME daycare. You have kids there probably 10+ hours a day. Also, my dck's get a lot of left-overs from a previous nights dinner (I often plan it that way). I'm essentially cooking for them, as well.

Reply

Absolutely I do. In fact most nights my ds and dh have eaten and left by the time kidlets get picked up
oh and I use the crock pot a lot! So a lot of times even if we haven't eaten yet, it is done and ready to go. So my moms have to walk through with my house smelling yummy. Now I did relabel my afternoon snack to "dinner". It is not a cooked meal but contains all the components. I feed them right around 4 so their kids are not starving at pick up to buy them some time when they get home.

Reply

I start dinner while the kids eat PM snack and finish it up at 4:45-5pm when most of them are gone.

For example, throw a chicken and potatoes in the oven on a timer, prep veggies and put in pots on the stove and clean the kitchen while the kids eat. Then at 4:45 turn on the veggie pots, carve the chicken and put out the plates and cutlery. Minimal dish cleanup after dinner with my routine too which is a bonus!

I also make soups, stews, chili, crockpot meals and prep for cold dinners in the morning while the kids have free play. Then it's just reheating for dinner.

Reply

I have always started dinner before the last child left. We sit down to eat as soon as everyone leaves.

Reply

I try but it doesn't always happen. What comments does the mom say?

Reply

I often start dinner before the last 2 leave. I want dinner over and done with so I can relax.

One of my girls' provider used to feed her family at 5:00 on the dot. She would give the kids that were still there whole carrots or crackers to munch while her family ate.

Reply

you can start to make dinner during nap time.

Reply

I have had a few comments , not many mean ones . One will ask what's cooking . I will tell them and say "I love crock pot cooking" with a smile .

Reply

Alright thanks! I'm glad I'm not in the wrong here. I wanted to make sure before I said something to mom. She is saying things like "Come on dcg, Miss_____ has her OWN stuff to do" or "must be nice to be able to cook dinner while you're getting paid" or "looks like Miss_____is clocked out!" Nothing terribly offensive, but I stayed open later just for her. Everyone else is gone by 4:30. Of course I'm going to do some of my chores and family obligations "on the clock". It's one of the few perks of this job.

Reply

I'm down to 1 or 2 by 500 and the counter I use for prep overlooks the classroom, so yeah I start cooking before all the kids leave. I just treat it as a free play time. Never had an issue with it from parents.

Reply

I would say that offensive. Maybe remind her that you are working late as a favor, but if she wishes to change pickup to 4:30 or 5 you'd be happy to accommodate. I wouldn't accept such rude passive-aggressive behavior

Reply

i'm not agree. All this words are very rude. There are three way to answer
-just ignore (not my way)
-to recommend her to start her own daycare and get this "benefit" to be able "to cook dinner while she is getting paid" (i can say so)
-let her know that you are going to cook your dinner without "getting paid" because of that her daughter must be picked up at 4.30pm (100% my way)

Reply

That's offensive and rude to me.

In comparison I get, "Mmmmmm, that smells good!" or "Do that kids get to eat whatever that is tomorrow? Jealous!" and then we laugh.

Reply

Ugh! I'd be like, "You can have your 62 cents back for this 15 minutes, if it makes you feel better." Then, I'd charge a 75 cent annoyance fee.

Reply

I'm going to be the opposite one here. I think it's unprofessional. Just like if someone was sitting on the couch during drop offs folding their family's laundry.
Now I start dinner while the kids are here but Im not actively cooking during pick ups.
I usually will do crock pot meals while I'm making breakfast or get some stuff cut up and prepped while the kids eat lunch or pm snack. I might put a pot on the stove to have the water boiling right when the last child is picked up, but I'm with the child when their parent
Arrives, not in the kitchen.

Reply

Uh, yeah I think I'd personally take those comments as personal digs. There's no reason for her to say anything like that... Something more like "hey altandra, I noticed you make dinner while dck is here. These are the reasons I don't like that..."

And then you can tell how stupid that is

Reply

I think those comments are very rude. Now, when I do start dinner, I guess I should clarify. I usually will do crockpot stuff or throw something in the oven. If it's something like cooking something on the stove, my husband or my kids will do that. If she has a problem with it though, she should just talk about it instead of saying those comments.

Reply

I agree))) I cooked dinner when no children are here.
But at the same time i would not let any one speak with me as it was showed above.

Reply

I always cook dinner with my daycare children here, they leave so late we wouldn't eat at a decent hour if I waited.. Usually it is something that takes a while to bake or a crockpot meal. If I have to be close to the stove, I sit the kids at the table with a fun project. Also, if a child is here past 6:15pm I feed them dinner too. I have NEVER had a parent complain. Usually they are asking for the recipe (which I give them happily). I think I would have to go off on a DCP that made the comments you're getting!

Reply

My clients like to guess what we are having for supper from the smell and jokingly ask if they can eat with us.....or at least I act like they are joking...

Reply

Lucky for me DH cooks, and he starts cooking whenever he has to so dinner is ready when we need it.

When I do have to cook I'll start it ahead of time if I have to, but usually I'm only cooking on nights DH is gone and I'm staying home so I can wait to start it later.

Reply

In my case, my entry door/front door opens into my living room/dining/kitchen combo. I would not be off in a separate room, leaving parents to fend for themselves. That WOULD be rude.

I also stop what I'm doing long enough to chat with the parent, unless once in a blue moon, there is something "critical" going on, in which case I apologize and multi-task. Very rare, though.

As far as unprofessional, I don't know that that's the right word. I guess I don't really give a fig if a parent might label it that way. If that's all they base their view of me on, then bye bye. There's too much good stuff going on here to warrant that, IMO.

Reply

Same here.

I close up daycare at 5:00, drive home and DH has dinner ready and waiting.

He does ALL the planning, prepping and cooking.

I clean. (this includes at daycare.)

I used to cook dinner when my kids were younger but everyone grew weary of eating dinner at 8PM or later so hubs took over and has done it ever since.

Reply

Her comments were beyond rude. I would personally tell her so too, but that's just me!

Cooking during the day is what happens in HOME daycare. Is she upset that you cook lunch for her kid?

Yes...she pays you. She pays you to make sure her child is loved and that her child's needs are met. You do that.

If she wants one on one, she needs a nanny. One who is willing to not eat, drink, take a pee or anything else that does not include her snowflake.

Reply

It happens here, too. Usually stems from frustrations with their own household chore issues. Their own husbands commenting on our super powers in a moment of idiocy does not help us....

Ignore, ignore, ignore. or:

"So, What did you do on your lunch break? Any good gossip today at the water cooler? "

Reply

To model and teach life skills in a Family Home Daycare?

I was under the impression that was a huge part of our profession.

I hate the word professional. The daycare politidemons have tainted it forever for me.

Kudos for sticking your neck out, though. You rock and I will think on it for months, now...

Reply

I always stop what I'm doing to answer the door and don't continue cooking while a parent is here picking up. This has been a problem a few times, when I get busy chatting and the potatoes on the stove boil dry & start to burn! I have pick ups between 4:30-6, so I usually get stuff prepped early and then throw whatever in the oven, so I'm not hovering over the stove at pick up!

Reply

I do the same as most stated above. I usually prep or throw something in the crockpot. Often times I am making things in larger batches for lunch the next day or for the feezer. I only have two kids left from 4:30 -5:15 and it's not a problem.
I would feel uncomfortable with a parent making those comments, there are only so many hours in a day and I work at home for a reason. To balance work and family, I feed my family nutritious meals which requires cooking real , unprocessed food. I will do the same for your child!

Reply

When my family was home, I always started dinner while dcks were here. I'd make quick work of it and always be available for the dcps or dcks. Crockpots were a godsend on those days. I'd do prep work during nap time so getting dinner made usually was a breeze. Well, at least years later that's what it felt like. I certainly wouldn't make some extravagant dinner that took an hour just to prepare while sticking the dcks in front of the tv but I see nothing wrong with a few minutes of chopping this or peeling that, sticking something in the oven.
And I agree with those that thought some of the dcm's comments were rude and passive aggressive.

Reply

I tend to agree with jenboo and wouldn't feel comfortable cooking dinner as parents were arriving for pick-up. I don't criticize those who do; I just wouldn't do it myself. I also close at 4:00 most days so getting dinner on the table at a decent hour isn't usually a problem here. I have used my crock pot, though, and fill it before the kids arrive for the day or while they're having morning snack. That way, dinner is ready and waiting at the end of the day.

I would be very offended, however, at this dc mom's comments especially since you are doing her the favor of staying open late just for her. Apparently, she's lost sight of that fact and could maybe use a reminder. The next time she makes a comment about you cooking "while you're getting paid", I would be very direct with her and remind her that you normally close by 4:30 and since you are doing her the favor of staying open late, you will have to make dinner in order to feed your family at a decent hour. If she's not okay with that, I'd tell her that she can start picking up by 4:30.

Reply

I think I would have to have a frank conversation with mom. As a home provider, you're right one of the perks is starting my dinner I know that may annoy you but what you don't see is that for me childcare and life blend together. I don't consider myself "cooking on the clock" like I don't consider myself working "off the clock" when I grocery shop on Saturdays or work on paperwork in the evening. I do what needs to be done in my home for myself and for childcare as the time permits. Some things, like a load of laundry may occur during childcare hours and sometimes washing all of the toys because someone got the flu happens in the evenings.
I hope that you will reevaluate the comments that you have been making and understand that I care for your child the entire time she is here. The good news is that if she learns to play and occupy herself while I am just supervising, she will do that at home for you also so that you can get some things done too!

Reply

Like Meyou I preplan most of my meals so that dinner is cooking by itself as dck's are being picked up. My dcp's might say something smells good, but they've never made a rude comment. Better the smell of dinner cooking then the fresh sent of recently changed poop...

If a parent wants a dc that doesn't do personal business during work, then I think it would benefit them to go to a center. I mean, as much as I try to limit personal business during dc hours, I often can't put things off. It's not THAT you do it, it's HOW you do it, IMO that makes the difference.

That said, I do NOT offer after hours care for the very issues the OP had - dcp's forget you are doing them a favor outside your normal hours and feel they can make comments. My contract states that "ABC Family Child Care closes promptly at 4:45. At 4:46 this child care switches to FST or FAMILY STANDARD TIME." So if a parent rushed in at 4:50, they shouldn't be surprised if their child is at the table coloring and I'm cooking my dinner. And they shouldn't be surprised when I have m hand out for the late fees

Reply

I think you should tell DCM that once everybody else is gone, her daughter is on family time. Your family is not on snowflake time.

Reply