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Old 06-06-2012, 08:46 AM
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pootmcgoot pootmcgoot is offline
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Default "Training" Infant For Daycare?

I read online yesterday something about high needs infants and day cares...a comment on an article I believe. It was along the lines of...after you have a baby and you know you will be going back to work, parent he infant in a way that will make the transition to daycare easier. Tips given were stuff like, don't hold baby every time he cries, find a soother other than mom/breast, if breast fed make sure bottle feeding is as natural as breastfeeding, don't co sleep, don't nurse to sleep etc.

Are these viable tips? I could see the benefit to the dcp and dck but I can also see how it could inhibit the parent bond. Then again when your infant is in daycare 12-13 hours a day, 5 days a week...60+hours a week total, you'd think parents would work with you since you spend a ton of time with the infant right?
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Old 06-06-2012, 08:55 AM
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Originally Posted by pootmcgoot View Post
I read online yesterday something about high needs infants and day cares...a comment on an article I believe. It was along the lines of...after you have a baby and you know you will be going back to work, parent he infant in a way that will make the transition to daycare easier. Tips given were stuff like, don't hold baby every time he cries, find a soother other than mom/breast, if breast fed make sure bottle feeding is as natural as breastfeeding, don't co sleep, don't nurse to sleep etc.

Are these viable tips? I could see the benefit to the dcp and dck but I can also see how it could inhibit the parent bond. Then again when your infant is in daycare 12-13 hours a day, 5 days a week...60+hours a week total, you'd think parents would work with you since you spend a ton of time with the infant right?
Yes, these are absolutely viable tips. Yeah, it probably does mess with the bond a parent has with a child but you can't have it both ways.

You can't parent one way and have the child cared for by a provider who does things differently (due to necessity because of "group care"). It just doesn't work.

All great reasons to work WITH the provider and vice versa. It is soooooo important to have parents in your care that work with you and not against you. It is only in the best interest of the child.

For example, I don't wear babies. I know some providers do, but I do not so a parent coming into my care will know that their child will not be worn so we would have to work together to form a routine so that the child has consistency which is so important in my opinion for healthy well adjusted kids.

Everyone does things differently so it is really important that BOTH providers and parents need to find a child care situation that is a good fit for them. Benefits everyone in the long run.
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Old 06-06-2012, 09:01 AM
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DaisyMamma DaisyMamma is offline
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Personally i believe that is how you should parent even if you don't use daycare. Babies cry. You don't need to pick them up every time. They will be much happier and you will be much happier. They need to learn to self soothe. They don't need to be constantly held.
It has nothing to do with bonding. You will still bond with your baby just fine. I'm not saying don't hold him. But if he is feed and changed, let him fuss a little. Definitely let him go to sleep on his own. And other times pick him up when he's happy.
I can tell you this.

Child #1. Parent held him constantly while on maternity and continues to do so. He is now 18 months old and has been miserable. Since starting daycare at 4 months... Walks around whining and crying all day and is rarely happy without mom. He will sit on my lap all day, but its no way for a child to learn. He needs to play.

Child #2. Parent let the baby learn to soothe himself from day one. He is now 6 months old and has been the happiest baby ever since starting daycare at age 8 weeks.... Smiles, rarely cries and is always happy.
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Old 06-06-2012, 09:36 AM
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Personally i believe that is how you should parent even if you don't use daycare.
Me too!
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Old 06-06-2012, 09:39 AM
AnneCordelia AnneCordelia is offline
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I personally believe it is a disservice to the child to NOT prepare them for daycare. What a shock to that poor baby's system to not know how to self-soothe, have a means to eat, and whatnot.

I think that it's more harmful to the parent-child bond for a parent to "attachment parent" for the whole maternity leave and then just leave the child at daycare without any prep work. A parent who is truly concerned about the emotional well being of their child prepares them for daycare.
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Old 06-06-2012, 11:34 AM
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when I was a young mom ,my future provider said do not do any thing that she could not do. I was shaking the bed a bit to soothe my colicky baby. The port-a-crib did not wiggle like that nor could she stand and wiggle it for 10 minutes..
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