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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Question on 6 month old
mommyneedsadayoff 09:48 AM 01-08-2015
I have a 6 month old who has been with me since 2 months. He comes a minimum of one day and a max of four days, depending on his mom's schedule (she does shift work, 4 on, 4 off). He seemed to be doing okay, but now I am having issues with his eating and sleeping.

He is breastfed, but has had no issue taking the bottle (he won't take it while I hold him, so I set him in his chair and feed him that way. Well, now he just tries to grab it and will purse his lips and spit out any that he gets in. I have tried waiting longer between feeds, so he will be hungry, but even then, he will suck down an ounce and then not want anymore. I am not going to feed him an ounce every hour (even though I think that is what mom does/nurse on demand and for comfort), so not sure how to phase him out of this.

Putting him down for sleep hasn't been an issue (he goes down on his back in the PNP with a paci), but now, as soon as I lay him down, he starts crying, falls asleep for 30-40 min and then wakes up screaming. I don't pick him up, but we do the song and dance of letting him fuss and then going in and giving paci. If he doesn't stop after 30 min, I get him up (and of course he is exhausted and miserable till the next sleep).

It is getting so hard to only have him on such a sporadic schedule. The weeks he is here one day are terrible and the long weeks are better on day 3 and 4, but terrible for the first two until I get him back on schedule. For the record, he is here from 5:15 am (goes right back to bed when he gets here) to 6:15 (13 hours) ad I am starting to think I made a huge mistake in taking him on.

***he is a BF baby, cosleeps, and often carried in a sling at home and I know that is making it hard for him here, but not sure how to address this with mom, since he spends a lot of time each week with her too on her 4 days off.
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Cradle2crayons 11:17 AM 01-08-2015
Originally Posted by mommyneedsadayoff:
I have a 6 month old who has been with me since 2 months. He comes a minimum of one day and a max of four days, depending on his mom's schedule (she does shift work, 4 on, 4 off). He seemed to be doing okay, but now I am having issues with his eating and sleeping.

He is breastfed, but has had no issue taking the bottle (he won't take it while I hold him, so I set him in his chair and feed him that way. Well, now he just tries to grab it and will purse his lips and spit out any that he gets in. I have tried waiting longer between feeds, so he will be hungry, but even then, he will suck down an ounce and then not want anymore. I am not going to feed him an ounce every hour (even though I think that is what mom does/nurse on demand and for comfort), so not sure how to phase him out of this.

Putting him down for sleep hasn't been an issue (he goes down on his back in the PNP with a paci), but now, as soon as I lay him down, he starts crying, falls asleep for 30-40 min and then wakes up screaming. I don't pick him up, but we do the song and dance of letting him fuss and then going in and giving paci. If he doesn't stop after 30 min, I get him up (and of course he is exhausted and miserable till the next sleep).

It is getting so hard to only have him on such a sporadic schedule. The weeks he is here one day are terrible and the long weeks are better on day 3 and 4, but terrible for the first two until I get him back on schedule. For the record, he is here from 5:15 am (goes right back to bed when he gets here) to 6:15 (13 hours) ad I am starting to think I made a huge mistake in taking him on.

***he is a BF baby, cosleeps, and often carried in a sling at home and I know that is making it hard for him here, but not sure how to address this with mom, since he spends a lot of time each week with her too on her 4 days off.
My advice, the number of days he's not in care are the problem. I would explain to mom that he isn't adjusting well to daycare due to the irregular schedule. On the weeks she's off, I'd ask her to bring him 3 days instead of one.

I'd also address the issue of her not having him on a schedule.

I generally have a sit down in depth conversation with the parents of infants that begins something like this

"Mom, juniors daycare experience can be a good one or bad one. Let me tell you how WE can make it a GOOD one" and go from there. I love having infants in care. But if the parents aren't on board, then it's in the babies best interest for mom to find a nanny.
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mommyneedsadayoff 11:24 AM 01-08-2015
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
My advice, the number of days he's not in care are the problem. I would explain to mom that he isn't adjusting well to daycare due to the irregular schedule. On the weeks she's off, I'd ask her to bring him 3 days instead of one.

I'd also address the issue of her not having him on a schedule.

I generally have a sit down in depth conversation with the parents of infants that begins something like this

"Mom, juniors daycare experience can be a good one or bad one. Let me tell you how WE can make it a GOOD one" and go from there. I love having infants in care. But if the parents aren't on board, then it's in the babies best interest for mom to find a nanny.
I was thinking that too, but I think the issue will be that she won't want to e away from him on those days. When he is here one day a week, she is usually working her shifts over the weekend, so bringing him the other days would be more time away from him, when she has just spent the last four days (12 hour shifts) away from him. It realy stinks, becasue I love that she wants to spend time with her baby, when she could easily bring him everyday (she pays the same weekly, regardless of how many days he comes), so I don't know if she will be on board.

I think a nany would be best, but there are hardly any nannies in my area and it would be incredibly very expensive (although I think they could prob afford it). I may just have to buckle down and have a talk with her, but I am so bad at that and hate confrontation. It can so easily backfire on me
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