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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>"I Spilled Milk" = I Peed At The Lunch Table
TheGoodLife 01:05 PM 02-07-2014
So DCG 21 months told me she spilled at the lunch table. Wiping up green beans on her chair when I felt her pants were wet. She told me it was milk. FF to when she's getting ready for nap and putting on a pull-up, and it REEKS off pee in the bathroom. Looking for a wet pull up or diaper... nope. Bent down to sniff by her bottom and sure enough! So frustrated that she lied to me and that I wiped up her "milk" during lunch time and just kept going So not like her, but she's been having problems following directions (cries when I ask her to do something like put on her pull up or pants before nap- not that she doesn't want to but like she's scared)

Not looking forward to going to work tonight (I serve at a restaurant)- I just want a glass of wine.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 01:07 PM 02-07-2014
My first thought was ... what has changed in her home life?
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preschoolteacher 01:12 PM 02-07-2014
My first thought is "how is a 21 month old in underwear?" I have 30, 33 month old girls here nowhere near potty trained!
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TheGoodLife 01:14 PM 02-07-2014
She has a very stable home life, and she actually potty trained over 6 months ago, very early but not forced by mom was just ready at an early age. Just needs a pull-up at nap and bedtime.
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Blackcat31 01:21 PM 02-07-2014
Originally Posted by Mama2Bella:
So DCG 21 months told me she spilled at the lunch table. Wiping up green beans on her chair when I felt her pants were wet. She told me it was milk. FF to when she's getting ready for nap and putting on a pull-up, and it REEKS off pee in the bathroom. Looking for a wet pull up or diaper... nope. Bent down to sniff by her bottom and sure enough! So frustrated that she lied to me and that I wiped up her "milk" during lunch time and just kept going So not like her, but she's been having problems following directions (cries when I ask her to do something like put on her pull up or pants before nap- not that she doesn't want to but like she's scared)
Not looking forward to going to work tonight (I serve at a restaurant)- I just want a glass of wine.
I have one like that. He is 3.

I think for mine anyways, it's the pressure. Mom really pushes him to succeed at a lot of things. He had a little regression about 6 months after potty training and I think he may of either gotten in trouble for accidents at home or he was shamed for it because if he has ANY issues with toileting and accidents he gets this scared look on his face that screams "anxiety"... or fear...

Not fear of being punished like spanked or anything but I think fear of doing the wrong thing, being shamed or embarrassed or maybe even told "you know better".

That's a lot of pressure for a kid.

I wonder if that is your little one's issue... especially the fear look and the lying about peeing....like she was afraid to be truthful about it for whatever reason...kwim?
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Blackcat31 01:22 PM 02-07-2014
Originally Posted by preschoolteacher:
My first thought is "how is a 21 month old in underwear?" I have 30, 33 month old girls here nowhere near potty trained!
I have 3 girls here (ages 3, 3 and 4) all of them were trained BEFORE age 2.

The earliest potty trained, "never had an accident ever" age here was 20 months. VERY verbal and female.
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daycarediva 01:27 PM 02-07-2014
Every girl I have ever had in care was pt before 3. WELL before. Most before 2.


Lying is a big no no, but if it's about pting, I usually let it slide.


My 4.5yo dcg had her first ever accident here (in 2.5 years) and I said "Oh! You spilled your water all over!" You go into the bathroom to change and I will get this mess cleaned up, ok dcg?" I got the BIGGEST hug when she came out of the bathroom. Saving them face sometimes prevents the issue.


Yucky that you just wiped it. What else did you wipe up after that? ew.
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Josiegirl 03:19 PM 02-07-2014
My thought was 'she's only 21 months old'. If she were 4 and told you it was milk, that'd put a whole different spin on it but the child isn't even 2 yet. I have a toddler here that's 21 months old and when you ask her a whole list of questions you get yes to everything, even if you asked her if there was an elephant in the room.
JMO
Sorry it happened to you. Kinda yuck.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 03:29 PM 02-07-2014
Originally Posted by preschoolteacher:
My first thought is "how is a 21 month old in underwear?" I have 30, 33 month old girls here nowhere near potty trained!
HAHA! I didn't even think on that at all. Children seem to be potty trained by 3.5 here.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 03:30 PM 02-07-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I have 3 girls here (ages 3, 3 and 4) all of them were trained BEFORE age 2.

The earliest potty trained, "never had an accident ever" age here was 20 months. VERY verbal and female.
I don't think I've ever had a child here who did not have an accident. Wow!!! That is impressive.
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TheGoodLife 04:07 PM 02-07-2014
OK, wow- I miscalculated (I was counting back from 2 years, not 3!). She will be 3 in May so she's 33 months. I was wondering why people were commenting on her age so much completely different! Anyway, she PTed a few mo the after turning two so she's well aware. Oh well, over now (but yeah, I was doing lunch so I'm sure I handled food afterward, which is why I was more upset)
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blandino 08:57 PM 02-07-2014
Originally Posted by Mama2Bella:
OK, wow- I miscalculated (I was counting back from 2 years, not 3!). She will be 3 in May so she's 33 months. I was wondering why people were commenting on her age so much completely different! Anyway, she PTed a few mo the after turning two so she's well aware. Oh well, over now (but yeah, I was doing lunch so I'm sure I handled food afterward, which is why I was more upset)
Haha, I couldn't figure out for the life of me how a 21 month old PT 6 months ago. I picture a 15 month old using the toilet .

Back to the PT age comments, I have never had a child PT younger than 2 or older than 3 (one DCB started after 3, and didn't PT until 3.5, but I don't include him as one of my kids, because I feel that had he been in my care - he would have PT sooner). I think it is very well possible to PT younger than 2, but IME that happens more with SAHMs. I did have one DCG who started at 2, and DCM said she was PT at 18 months. I guess if you count daily accidents PT, then she was.

My average age is 2.5, actually 31 months.
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Nebula 04:01 AM 02-10-2014
Originally Posted by blandino:
I picture a 15 month old using the toilet .


.

Maybe it's because it's 5 AM and I haven't been able to fall asleep yet, but that comment made me laugh!
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coolconfidentme 07:19 AM 02-10-2014
All my kids were PT by 2. Rarely do I get a DCK who is PT until they are 3. Did we try harder as parents or what?
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babyluver 21 10:31 AM 02-10-2014
One of my little daughters was 18mos done even at night. Most were done by 2 and one was abt to turn 3. All kids r different. I did have one dck pting at almost 5 that smeared poop everywhere in the 2 mins he eas.in the bathroom. And tried to lie about it even when his hands were wearing the evidence!!!!
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Starburst 04:13 PM 02-11-2014
Saying she "spilled milk" instead of saying she peed/had an accident might be her idea of trying to cover it up so she doesn't get in trouble or embarrassed in front of the other kids.

or it could be that she heard her mom or someone else say something like "no use crying over spilt milk" when having an accident so she is trying to use it as an expression for peeing.
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cheerfuldom 05:20 PM 02-11-2014
My oldest was day trained including naps well before 2. I put a little potty in her room at night and she would get up and pee and wipe herself off and tuck herself in at just over 2 years old. Some kids are just so independent about it. and then others, like my middle daughter, was having regular accidents till 4 years old. Even after that she will have an accident at least once every two weeks.
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daycare 05:37 PM 02-11-2014
I have a 3.5 year old that screams at the drop of a hat when we transition.

IE today we were about to do a craft and I said after we sing some songs we are going to go to the art table. Instead of saying I am not interested or I would like to do something else, it's instant screaming.

I never could put my finger on it until I read BC response.The child is very part time, parents put a lot of pressure on the kid and expect a lot out of the kid from my program. The kid has never really gotten hang of our schedule and routines despite being here for 2.5 years.

every transition results in screaming. I termed the family 3 weeks ago, march 3 will be their last day here. I felt bad that the kid could not adapt after being here this long and felt that it was time to move on.

I agree could be just to much pressure and high expectations from the parents
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TheGoodLife 09:02 PM 02-11-2014
Parents (DCM at least, don't know dad but he seems so nice from the 3 times we've seen eachother) are very supportive and I can't imagine them being very high pressure or demanding. Mom is the perfect mix of nice yet consistent/firm when needed. Best DCM I could have!

Today, however, I go in the bathroom to help her turn the water on to wash her hands and she had another accident, told me she didn't, and had taken the clothes off and put them back on (and they were SOAKED- not sure how she even got them on). So I told her that she's not in trouble for having an accident (again, I tell her each time) but that she had a time out for not telling me and then lying about it She's now in pull-ups until she goes w/o accidents for 2 weeks and I have to go with her to make sure she doesn't need help. Accidents are one thing, but I just can't have her peeing herself and not telling me so that I can clean it up properly and immediately. DCM said there's nothing different at home and we can't figure it out. But for now, that's where we'll sit I guess.
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daycarediva 05:07 AM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Mama2Bella:
Parents (DCM at least, don't know dad but he seems so nice from the 3 times we've seen eachother) are very supportive and I can't imagine them being very high pressure or demanding. Mom is the perfect mix of nice yet consistent/firm when needed. Best DCM I could have!

Today, however, I go in the bathroom to help her turn the water on to wash her hands and she had another accident, told me she didn't, and had taken the clothes off and put them back on (and they were SOAKED- not sure how she even got them on). So I told her that she's not in trouble for having an accident (again, I tell her each time) but that she had a time out for not telling me and then lying about it She's now in pull-ups until she goes w/o accidents for 2 weeks and I have to go with her to make sure she doesn't need help. Accidents are one thing, but I just can't have her peeing herself and not telling me so that I can clean it up properly and immediately. DCM said there's nothing different at home and we can't figure it out. But for now, that's where we'll sit I guess.
If it's new and nothing is different, she may have a UTI. Just a thought.
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Starburst 09:07 AM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by coolconfidentme:
All my kids were PT by 2. Rarely do I get a DCK who is PT until they are 3. Did we try harder as parents or what?
I think it's because it takes a lot of time, patience and consistency to potty train a child. Most parents don't work at home and may just not have the time or patience to focus on that until the child is a little older. Also every child is different, and not every child is developmentally ready at 2. I used to babysit a 4 year old boy (almost 5) and was verbally delayed and had a difficult time potty training (also had issues with eating too). I would try to set regular potty check times every hour and he kept refusing (power struggle) and would wind up peeing his pants; his parents put him in underwear because he called pull ups/training pants "diapers" and would just use that instead of the toilet. After a while when I watched him regularly, he started getting the hang of it but when I didn't watch him for a while (went to a commercial DC center), he slipped a lot and was back in diapers.

Plus, on average, girls tend to potty train sooner than boys.
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