I have read here numerous times about not being able to tell parents certain things about children and especially if there child is hurt by another child we can't say who did it. I can't find this anywhere in my rules and regulations provided by my state. Is this really a written rule or something that providers go by?

The reason I'm really curious on this is all but one of my daycare children talk extremely well. They are always telling there parents what goes on here. So of course it ran rapid through the kids telling the parents about the one child I have had problems with last week. They will say "**** was really bad" or "**** did this or that". I even had one say "I can't play or talk to **** for awhile because **** was being bad." The parent had witnessed the childs behavior and saw how bad it was.

So what do I say if parents question me about this behavior with this one child. I don't want to lose anyone on this but the parents and I have some things in line when behavior gets out of line. It will be things parents will notice when coming and going. A certain quiet place is the biggest one and its just for this child and not all the children.

All the parents pretty much know what each child has done for the day because all my little ones seem to talk. So if they ask me about this childs behavior do I just say it is being addressed and change topic or what? It almost feels like I'm covering something up when all the parents know what is going on.

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I'm in the same boat as all of my kids but one talk very well.
When a parent confronts me about what a child did, I will confirm it and nothing more. I just reassure them that the problem has been corrected and we all have moved forward from it.

Keep it simple and don't go into great detail.

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The thing is though it has been correctedat that moment it will still be on going situation for awhile until we figure out what it going on. So I don't want parents being hesitant to bringing their child until we can figure out what is causing these episodes with this child. It could be child suddenly challenging boundaries and such or there could be an underlying behavioral issue that we aren't aware of.

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I tell them if they only believe 10% of what their children tell them, I'll only believe 10% of what they tell me. That usually puts the stories in perspective. If they ask about a specific incident I just say something like, "We're always working on someone's latest trick around here. I can't get into details but I'll be ready if another one hits this stage, that's for sure!!"

My kids tell me some CRAAAAZY stories so this works well for me.

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If children can talk, then privacy isn't even an option. A talking child will promptly announce to their parent that "Sally bit me" as soon as you open the door...then they will point her out and make sure she knows she's being ratted out!

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This is so true!!

When the parents ask you then you just say...." Little Johnnys parents and I have been working on this issue, and as you know since you are a parent to, kids go through phases and its our job as parents and providers to help them through it" Because all privacy is out the door when kids talk!!

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Privacy? Thats a joke. We have a ruling that if one child bites we don't tell the parents who did it or the biter's parents who (or is it whom) he bit. The minute ANYONE walks in the door everyone runs up saying"So-n-so bit whats-his-name". Yeah right, privacy.

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All but one of my kids can fully talk.

Luckily they don't get physical with each other so they never have THAT to report but they do share each others potty training stories and how well they did for lunch

I have parents asking me how so and so is doing on the potty cuz that was the topic de jour during last nights supper

When they see the "trainee" at arrivals and departures they are sure to mention how well they are doing and tell them to keep up the good work.

Yeah... it takes a village.

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