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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Dealing With Past-Termed Client
momofboys 04:29 PM 08-13-2012
I have not been posting much lately b/c I have been enjoying my summer with my own kids but school is fastly approaching. I have 2 families beginning in the next 2 weeks. Excited. Here's my concern: earlier this summer I termed a family b/c the dad was getting angry at me/not respecting me etc. After I termed he left me an angry VM about how I was unprofessional & a few other choice words lol! Anyway, I was glad to be finished with the family. Only issue is their child is in my child's PK class & although I won't have to see the parent's everyday I am concerned that when I do see them (1 parent works PT so they will still take child to PK 1-2x a week) it will not be pleasant. I am also concerned that they will make trouble for my child in the class. Their child is a very sensitive child & i am worried they will be questioning him each day as to whether MY CHILD said anything inappropriate to him/her, etc. IE I think they will make a big deal about everything. How would you deal with them? Or would you simply ignore them as much as possible? The class will be a small class, likely only 10-12 kids so we will see each other at some point.
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MNMum 08:39 PM 08-13-2012
I would just ignore them. They probably won't be so low to involve the kids, if they did, I would remove my child from the class. We have across the street neighbors, the dad has been incredibly rude to my husband and I. We've tried being overly nice, normal, now I've succumbed to just pretending he is not there. Nothing I say will change the way he is behaving. They are at least adult enough to not involve the kids. Both sets of kids know about our relationship, though, kids pick up on that kind of thing. They just choose to play with different kids most of the time.
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momofboys 05:50 AM 08-14-2012
Originally Posted by MNMum:
I would just ignore them. They probably won't be so low to involve the kids, if they did, I would remove my child from the class. We have across the street neighbors, the dad has been incredibly rude to my husband and I. We've tried being overly nice, normal, now I've succumbed to just pretending he is not there. Nothing I say will change the way he is behaving. They are at least adult enough to not involve the kids. Both sets of kids know about our relationship, though, kids pick up on that kind of thing. They just choose to play with different kids most of the time.
Tks for your input! I think I will just attempt to ignore them. I am just worried they will cause problems for my son. I termed them & part of their anger I guess was from me telling them "no, I won't put up with your anger or your"special" - but I would sincerely hope they are embarassed by their behavior, it was quite childish It would have to be very bad for me to pull my son out of PK so hoping there will be no issues!
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texascare 06:19 AM 08-14-2012
Ignoring is the best thing. I terminated a family last year and I see her every now and then at the grocery store and I just ignore her. If your son says something to you about abythung happening at school then I would talk with the teacher.
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providerandmomof4 06:29 AM 08-14-2012
I know how you feel and it's very uncomfortable. I have a neighbor whose daughter used to be in my daycare. He was a chronic late pay and due to seeing him multiple times a day, I didn't want to term him. Being the passive aggressive person I am I wrote him several letters reminding him of payment policy and it didn't help. I was so glad when he told me he wouldn't be needing me anymore due to dcg starting Pre-k. He still owes me 32$ to this day! Oh yea! Then calls this week and says that he guesses he may need me once in a while in the afternoons (after pre-k)! I told him that isn't possible and I had to fill her spot....which I didn't...I just don't want to mess with him anymore. More trouble than it's worth.
I also have been in the uncomfortable position of being at the store and seeing clients that I have termed. They gave me dirty looks and I pretended that I didn't notice. I guess that I would suggest just going about your business as if you have no hard feelings and see how they act. I can understand you being worried, but you don't know if it will be a problem yet. Hopefully they will surprise you
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Blackcat31 06:30 AM 08-14-2012
I agree with the other posters and I would absolutely ignore them and not give them anything but a courteous smile should you happen to come face to face.

However, I would maybe also consider taking a pro-active approach and say something vague to the PK teacher just giving her a head's up that you and Mr. XX had a falling out during a business relationship and you are just wanting her to know should something come up during the school year.

Saying nothing more than that should clue the teacher in without being gossipy or breaking confidentiality rules in anyway.

If I were the teacher and Mr. XX came to me complaining about a child and I knew ahead of time that there was a bit of stress/strife between the two parents, I would know how to handle it a bit better. Just my two cents.

Hoping the parent will keep their big boy pants on though and let the issues you had be water under the bridge.
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ritah 03:08 PM 08-14-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
However, I would maybe also consider taking a pro-active approach and say something vague to the PK teacher just giving her a head's up that you and Mr. XX had a falling out during a business relationship and you are just wanting her to know should something come up during the school year.

Saying nothing more than that should clue the teacher in without being gossipy or breaking confidentiality rules in anyway.

If I were the teacher and Mr. XX came to me complaining about a child and I knew ahead of time that there was a bit of stress/strife between the two parents, I would know how to handle it a bit better. Just my two cents.
I agree with Blackcat on this.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 03:24 PM 08-14-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I agree with the other posters and I would absolutely ignore them and not give them anything but a courteous smile should you happen to come face to face.

However, I would maybe also consider taking a pro-active approach and say something vague to the PK teacher just giving her a head's up that you and Mr. XX had a falling out during a business relationship and you are just wanting her to know should something come up during the school year.

Saying nothing more than that should clue the teacher in without being gossipy or breaking confidentiality rules in anyway.

If I were the teacher and Mr. XX came to me complaining about a child and I knew ahead of time that there was a bit of stress/strife between the two parents, I would know how to handle it a bit better. Just my two cents.

Hoping the parent will keep their big boy pants on though and let the issues you had be water under the bridge.
I completely agree. Here's to hoping that the past stays in the past.
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MizzCheryl 06:06 PM 08-14-2012
It will not take the teacher long to figure out who the trouble maker is. Just take the high road. People like that seem to dig them self in deeper and deeper.
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Texasjeepgirl 06:47 AM 08-15-2012
In 20 years.. I've had a few disgruntled clients leave my care...It's usually regarding the fact that they did not fully read the PARENT HANDBOOK...and were angry about owing a personal day/vacation day/holiday...
But there have also been instances of clients falling behind on payment... unable to catch up... they leave care with no notice...(back before I began charging 2 week deposit to protect me from this occurance)....
I don't live in a tiny town... but it is smallish I suppose compared to some...
(15,000)...
I do occasionally see former clients out in public.. Walmart usually... If I come directly face to face.. I plaster the most fake smile I can on my face.. I do not speak.. I hold my head up high...and walk on past...

I do have 1 former client who left because she had not made financial arrangements to pay for my vacation time ..
She had 2 children.
Single mom...
on assistance for her childcare fees... but assistance program does not cover my vacation days...
She had over 6 months advanced notice of my vacation time... also multiple periodic reminders...and an offer for her to pay out the amount she would owe...over the 6 month time period... so as to lessen the financial burden...
she opted to wait until the week before....ask her dad...he refused...so she removed her children with no notice.. and no payment..
When I sent letters regarding the balance due... she called... left rude attacking messages... made comments about my CRAZY policies...
(closing time of 5:30 ...and expectation to be paid for days off)...
then she went on to say that she believed I was only nice to her children IN FRONT OF HER...but that she thought I was MEAN to them otherwise..?
Over 1 year later... one of my current clients ran into her at a beauty shop (she is a hairdresser)...and she proceeded to rant and rave about how crazy I am... what an awful daycare I have... etc...etc...
The current daycare client gave me a blow by blow the following day..
I just have to smile...and ignore....

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