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  #1  
Old 04-18-2013, 04:47 PM
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Default Just For Fun: OT- 6 Year Old Gets Detention Because Dad Made Her Late For School?

Do you think this is fair?

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow...2506.html?vp=1

I personally do think it's a little unfair because a child that young does not have any control over when their ride gets them to school, they are completely at the mercy of the adult. Even in high school we only got in trouble if it was multiple times, and even then if there were certain issues with a ride the teachers would try to cut you some slack. If she was caught intentionally trying to be late for school like- she was in the hallway just sitting there after the bell rang- than yes it would be fair. Or if she was in middle school or high school and lived within walking distance of the school then maybe okay I can understand that.

I was once late in elementary school (I think it was about 4th or 5th grade- I had the same teacher both years) because my brother was acting up before school and made us run late- I got in the door like a second after the bell rang. I freaked out (literally started crying) because my teacher pulled a stick from my cup. They had a stick system where at the beginning of every day everyone has 3 sticks in their cup and if you get one pulled out it was a first warning, another pulled out and you had to spend the shorter morning recess in the class room or on the line, a third one and you have to stay on the line during afternoon recess/lunch- that was like the first (and only) time I had ever gotten it pulled but I was still freaking out because I was afraid that the teacher was mad at me.
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  #2  
Old 04-18-2013, 06:49 PM
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Absolutely ridiculous! It is not the child's fault that her parents dropped her off late. And their reason for doing so? They are adjusting to having a new baby at home! That's a great excuse if I've ever heard one. I bet that little girl could have used some extra time with mom and dad in the morning... more than she really needed those first 15-20 minutes of kindergarten.

If this would have been a truancy issue, the parents should be held responsible. From what I can tell from the article, she was late. Twice. I'd be so ticked.
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Old 04-18-2013, 07:03 PM
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Is it bad that if it were me and she were my child, I'd pick her up before lunch and bring her back afterward? I'd do it forever if I had to. There'd be NO WAY IN HELL that I'd allow my child to take the fall for something that was my fault.
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Old 04-18-2013, 07:28 PM
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I think it's ridiculous to send a young child to detention for the parent causing them to be late. They have absolutely no control of their parents running late.
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Old 04-18-2013, 09:18 PM
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Also before this I have never heard of them giving detention for kindergarteners! I always thought it was for the older schoolers, like maybe around 3rd grade.
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  #6  
Old 04-19-2013, 06:25 AM
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I served Detention for being late 3+ times.. IN HIGH SCHOOL!

This is nuts! I thought it was cute that the Dad sat with her on one of the detentions though. (I know kids that would find a way to be late just to have lunch with Dad.)
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Old 04-19-2013, 07:55 AM
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I never really understood why some adults punish a child for something that their parent does when they child has no control over it.

My nephew has always been in baseball and last year at age 7 he got a coach that was very much a disciplinarian. He has a reputation. So my SIL bit her lip and instead of asking for another coach (like several other parents did) she just went with it. The coach however changed the original time that he had said that practices would be held at after my SIL had already made arrangements with her work and although they sometimes could accommodate her and let her off earlier it wasn't always possible (her shifts ended at 5pm and twice a week they tried letting her out at 3:30pm so my nephew could make the 4pm practices, originally they were at 4:30) but sometimes she couldn't get out that early and made it there at 4:45 sometimes 5pm.

Well the coach would make my nephew run laps for the remainder of the practice on these days until my SIL just told him that since there was no reason to even show up on days she couldn't get out early enough she would just not bring him to practice on those days. The coach then would make my nephew sit out a game for each practice that he missed. We were all very upset and it was stressing my nephew out to the point that he didn't want to play anymore so my SIL told the coach that she was pulling him out of baseball for the season. That's when the coach all of a sudden changed his tactic and backpaddled (my nephew was one of two of the best players on his team and had always been picked for All-Stars every year). After that there was no big issues but there were smaller things that bothered my SIL about the coach.

This year when she found out that my nephew was on his team again and after finding out she couldn't switch teams she pulled him completely and signed him with another league because he was already saying that he didn't want to play anymore and they hadn't even had their first team meeting or practice yet. His face literally lit up when she suggested joining a different league, he disliked that coach so much.

If a child does something then okay, yes they should have a consequence. But if the child has no control over something then how can you punish the child? Children already internalize everything and punishing them for something they can't change isn't fair.
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Old 04-19-2013, 09:02 AM
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Try going into a school office right after school starts. You'll find several kids coming into the office to check in because they're late. I had to take my dcb late a few weeks back. (My daughter accidently picked up his clothes and took them to work with her so I had to take him home to get some clothes.) There were 9 kids standing in line to check in.

Kids coming in late disrupt the office to check in. (Yes, it's their job, I know.) Then they go to the classroom where they disrupt whatever the teacher has going on. Some on here complain about parents coming in late. How would you handle it if you had several kids coming in late every day disrupting the other students?

The school can't punish the parents, so what do you expect them to do? What would your solution be?
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  #9  
Old 04-19-2013, 10:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sharlan View Post
Try going into a school office right after school starts. You'll find several kids coming into the office to check in because they're late. I had to take my dcb late a few weeks back. (My daughter accidently picked up his clothes and took them to work with her so I had to take him home to get some clothes.) There were 9 kids standing in line to check in.

Kids coming in late disrupt the office to check in. (Yes, it's their job, I know.) Then they go to the classroom where they disrupt whatever the teacher has going on. Some on here complain about parents coming in late. How would you handle it if you had several kids coming in late every day disrupting the other students?

The school can't punish the parents, so what do you expect them to do? What would your solution be?
By no means am I being snarky and by no means do I think that it's acceptable of kids to be late to school but since you brought up the topic of daycare I got to thinking about whether or not it would then be appropriate for the providers that have parent's that bring their children late to daycare should put the kids in a time out when they are late if it is in their contract and policies that they need to arrive on time? (I personally don't care at what time parents show up).

I don't see how punishing the child helps the situation. In my area and state frequent tardies and absences get reported and the parents can be fined and/or imprisoned. Imprisonment is an extreme measure for parents of children of extreme habitual tardiness and/or absences but there are consequences and the consequences are for the parents not the children.

At my daughters school they are firm with this and there are meetings and conferences with the parent that you must attend where they pretty much scold you (my aunt went through this when she didn't get a handle on her responsibilities) and scare you into bringing your child to school on time. If you don't show up to these meetings or if there aren't any improvements they report the tardies and absences to the school board and then the board reports it to whoever it is they report it to and the parent will get a court hearing where the judge will determine if action needs to be taken or not. That tardies and absences could get so bad that it goes that far is ridiculous if you ask me however the punishment is for the parent, not the child ...unless the child skips school on purpose or ditches and the parent has no control. In that case then the child faces community service, probation or time in juvenile detention but the parent usually at minimum needs to pay a fine if it gets to that point because, well ... they're the parent.

In CA if a child misses 10 percent of their classes the parents can be charged with a misdemeanor and fined $2,000 or can face up to a 1 year sentence if, after being offered state support and counseling, their kids still fail to improve their attendance. In my state 3 tardies of 30 minutes or more equals an absence if it is unexcused (funeral, medical or dental appointment, illness etc).

http://www.cde.ca.gov/ls/ai/tr/
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  #10  
Old 04-19-2013, 04:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sharlan View Post
Try going into a school office right after school starts. You'll find several kids coming into the office to check in because they're late. I had to take my dcb late a few weeks back. (My daughter accidently picked up his clothes and took them to work with her so I had to take him home to get some clothes.) There were 9 kids standing in line to check in.

Kids coming in late disrupt the office to check in. (Yes, it's their job, I know.) Then they go to the classroom where they disrupt whatever the teacher has going on. Some on here complain about parents coming in late. How would you handle it if you had several kids coming in late every day disrupting the other students?

The school can't punish the parents, so what do you expect them to do? What would your solution be?
Hmm - perhaps making the parents bring the child back home for the day?

I agree it's disrupting - we had a parent that brought her daughter 45 minutes to an hour late just about every day of Prek. We had playtime for the first 20 minutes of class. That way if there were kids late, they wouldn't disrupt lessons and the kids quickly caught on that if they were late, they missed "fun time."
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Old 04-19-2013, 04:53 PM
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It worked, though. The dad said she won't be late again .

You would think if you knew that your child might get detention because you were continually late you'd make sure you got up a little earlier to get her to school on time.
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Old 04-19-2013, 04:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAngels View Post
It worked, though. The dad said she won't be late again .

You would think if you knew that your child might get detention because you were continually late you'd make sure you got up a little earlier to get her to school on time.
It's really not that different than when a DCK doesn't come with all the proper outside gear because the PARENT forgot.

The child gets "punished" by not being able outside.



We participate with the local YMCA for twice weekly swim lessons. One of my DCP forgot to bring a swimsuit/towel for their child.

The other 4 kids I have that go went. The child who's parent forgot the stuff had to stay behind.

Neither of those things were the child's fault (or responsibility) and yet they suffered the consequences.

Whether it is "right" or not....it is just a couple things that came to mind.
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  #13  
Old 04-19-2013, 04:59 PM
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They do that at our local school... On the THIRD tardy, detention is ordered.... Never had it happen but yes that's crazy as heck!!!
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