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Parents and Guardians Forum>Daycare Provider Purchased Pit Bull Mix
MrSint 08:25 AM 11-12-2010
Hi there - first post. We have our toddler daughter, and soon will have a 3 month old girl placed in daycare run out of a woman's home in Illinois. Recently, my wife noticed as she was leaving a puppy in the back yard that seemed to be pit bull-like in appearance. Anyway, I happened upon the woman who runs the daycare while she was walking said puppy. I used to raise dogs & know a fair amount about them so I asked her first if it was her puppy - she said yes. I then asked what kind it was to which she squeemishly replied 'it's a weimaraner mix'. Well, it indeed had weimaraner, but was unmistakabley mixed with a pit bull - and I'm guessing it was a rescue. She went on to say how she sort of 'introduced' the dog so it knew there were kids around.... but that it was kept separate the entire time, etc... I didn't bring up the fact that it was clearly half pit bull - figured I'd wait to discuss with my wife first.

Before getting to my concerns (if they're not apparent already) - let me just say that I am not interested in debating issues related to this 'misunderstood' breed. I don't want to hear any anectotal stories about specific pit bulls that you have or know that are just the sweetest little cup of warm butter that wouldn't hurt a fly. I don't want to hear about the deadly Pomeranian back in '93 or the vast media conspiracy stereotyping this breed or how it's the 'owners not the dogs' - besides, I don't want to have to trust her or her two tweener boys to be responsible pit mix owners - and over time, there is NO WAY she'd be able to guarantee the dog would remain separated from the kids at all times... at SOME point, it'll squeak by her - jump or push a gate - something - anyone who has owned so much as a Maltese can tell you that - and 'new' encounters with toddlers and babies at face level can go very wrong. Again, I know plenty about dogs... and I know differnet breeds have different tendencies relative to behavior that have been re-inforced thru selective manipulation over time. Pits are not the only breed that would concern me - but they are at the top of my list based in part on the overwhelming statistical data, their historical 'function' which preceded their current 'form', and perhaps most critically - their sheer physical makeup in terms of capacity to inflict severe damage should the unlikely ever occur. Bottom line - I'm not going to be influenced by any anthropromorphic evaluation of this breed relative to some generalized aversion to bigotry - my daughters' safety trumps all.

SO - what do I do? We LOVE the daycare - the other kids/parents - the provider is great. It's convenient - not too expensive - etc... and now THIS. If I voice concerns and they get rid of the dog - well great, now WE'RE the jerks who made them get rid of their precious puppy - probably sending her OWN two kids to tears... I certainly wouldn't want the person watching my kids to hate their parents. I tried to look around to see if there were any laws in IL against this, or insurance issues that I could reference so as to 'help advise' her... I know in California, they'll deny insurance for any injuries caused by certain breeds of dogs... but that's it - and nothing in IL. I'm thinking my only option is to find somewhere else to go - which is going to be challenging & disappointing on many levels. Frankly, I'm ticked that she would even MAKE such a decision without so much as consulting any of her clients - it's a bad business move seeing as I am NOT the only person who would have this concern. Any advice on other options I may not be seeing would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
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Unregistered 09:26 AM 11-12-2010
Have you checked with daycare licensing to determine if they have any rules regarding dog breeds?

If not, try it. However, be prepared, if you contact licensing and they force her to get rid of the dog, she may get rid of you too.

It's not that I don't agree with you...I personally wouldn't have made the choice that she has made. I just think that outside of sharing your feelings about the dog with the provider and then giving notice, you are pretty much out of luck. It is her business and her home, she isn't under any obligation to discuss it with you.

By the way, I would absolutely give notice. I'm a dog lover myself, I have two indoor dogs and two out, but there is no way I would take a chance on that particular breed. And no, I don't want to debate it with anyone either! :-)
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momofsix 09:46 AM 11-12-2010
I dont know about licensing regs in IL but where I live, she would need to contact you before she got the dog, not asking permission. but at least letting you know. Parents should definitely know if there's a pet in the home. Also where I live, potentially aggressive pets may be in the home, but must be kept seperated from the children at all times. If she has stated that the dog will be kept seperate, I would ask her to show you HOW the dog will be kept seperate-have her show you the kennel, fence,
gates...whatever she plans on using. Let her know your concerns, and at least hear her out. If you're not happy with what she shows you then yes, you may have to find other care. You can't demand she get rid ot the dog, so unless she volunteers on her own (which would NOT make her hate you, I'm sure!) I don't see many options for you. Sorry!
BTW, i am a provider that has a dog, so I'm coming from that perspective, but I was also bitten by a dog and had over 200 stitches on my head, so I'm understanding that viewpoint too!
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SilverSabre25 10:14 AM 11-12-2010
Well...no offense...but it sounds like you've made up your mind about the dog and if it's going to worry you then really your only choice is to find a different provider. You say you know dogs, that you don't want to hear anything but agreement about the horribleness of the breed, and that your DDs' safety is the most important.

Since this is YOUR opinion about the dog and YOUR choice to not trust it, then you definitely have NO business telling the lady to get rid of the dog. You're right about that. You need to start searching for another daycare, let her know that being uncomfortable with the dog (and you don't even have to make it personal to the breed--you could make it sound like any dog would make you uncomfortable which is honestly how you come across to me) and that is the reason you are leaving. Perhaps she's having problems with other parents re: this dog and will decide to give it back to the rescue organization. Perhaps your voicing your concerns will give her a wake up call that she needs to rethink the dog decision.

Please note that I'm not passing judgment on the breed or on your feelings about it. I'm not going to say how I feel one way or the other about the dog, the breed, the daycare provider, or anything else. This is merely my opinion based on the information you posted and the tone of your post.
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MrSint 10:21 AM 11-12-2010
Thanks - and don't get me wrong... I LOVE dogs - grew up with them - all I can manage is fish for the time being but would love to get our own dog one day. It's just that, IMO, this breed raises particular concerns - and I can't trust how it's going to be raised, what its individual temperment will turn out to be - where it came from - or what it will do. The fact is that in the majority of cases where a dog attack occurs, it's happened 'out of the blue' - where an otherwise saintly animal has a 'bad moment' one day... and surprise! My own parents' terrier had just such a day & snapped at my daughter... but THAT dog is a Yorkie so what's the worst that can happen? Compare that to the firepower of a pit mix & the consequences are exponentially different. Really, ANY dog is a big responsibility - bigger still if you're running a business that cares for small children/babies out of its residence. It's one thing if she had an established dog when we signed up - then we could make that decision... but to bring in an unproven pit mix rescue puppy without so much as a mention? I know it's her right to do as per the current laws - as it is our right to switch daycares - but as we all know, it's not as easy as switching brands of beer here... and if you think I'M upset by all this - boy, you should talk to my wife!
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QualiTcare 10:33 AM 11-12-2010
i agree with you. i think it's totally insane to get a dog, but especially a pit bull as a daycare provider without mentioning it to already established parents. that way, if you didn't like it, you would have time to find other care, and she could have the mutt.

i don't trust ANY dog i don't know around my kids. i never have, and my skepticism was reinforced when i was at my parent's house and their neighbors little puny looking boston terrier ran out of his yard, into my parent's yard, and bit my 4 year old on the leg for no apparent reason. no way in ten hells would i want a child staying in a home with a pit bull.

BUT you could see like someone else mentioned, how she plans to keep this dog restrained. it's possible that she has a fence (with a top) to keep him in so there's no possible way he could get loose.

it's actually very inconsiderate that she would do that without a thought so you shouldn't have any reservations about saying something to her.
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MrSint 10:39 AM 11-12-2010
I checked the licensing laws as well as insurance related matters.... not so much to 'report' anyone as I wouldn't do that - again, she's a good person & a great provider - I was more looking to see if there was an opportunity for me to say - hey, this might cause some issues with licensing and/or insurance so you might do well to rethink it - but I think that's a dead end. Yeah, I didn't want this post to become an argument on the breed as that will quickly spiral downward - so I tried to relay that my opinion is set on that matter - so any advice on what to do beyond that is what I'm looking to garner.
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MommyMuffin 10:41 AM 11-12-2010
I would be upset as well if my provider got a dog and or cat without letting me know first. As you have already stated you know your options. I dont know of any regulations in MN where I am from.
Although you said that you didnt wanted to hear any stories, I must tell.
I had a sweet lab/pit mix, he was a gem! We cried the day we gave him away to some nice people.
I was opening a daycare and I knew parents would perhaps shy away if they knew I had a pit/lab mix. I also did not want to even risk the chance of a child getting hurt. I now have no pets, my family was sad about giving him away but I know I am running a buisness and I had to make the decision for my buisness to be safe and profitable. (This is only my opinion)
I am not saying that every daycare should give up their pets, I am just saying for me the risks were just far too great.
A scar from a animal on a childs face lasts forever. I should know...I have one.
Back to your post...I think you should go with your gut!
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nikia 10:53 AM 11-12-2010
Is it just the breed you have a problem with? I dont like pitsbulls either but I am also niave about them not being around many of them. I have a great dane, massive dog, protective dog. He is in an outside kennel during daycare hours not because he is aggressive but because of his size and he is still a puppy not yet 2 years old, so he doesnt know that he is not a lap dog. He is not around daycare kids at all. Have you talked to your provider about a set up like this?? I always tell my new parents about my great dane and that he has no contact with daycare kids because of his size. I show them were he is kept and that it is away from the daycare kids. All of my parents have no problems with this. So maybe you can run something that by your provider, if she is a responsible daycare provider and dog owner she would have thought about this before getting a dog. Dogs cant be tied up all day in a backyard that is asking for trouble. My dog has shelter and plenty of space to run in his outside "home". As soon as daycare kids leave he is let out and is happy as can be knowing this routine. Try voicing your concerns and be honest with her. Communication is the key to all relatioships
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MrSint 12:05 PM 11-12-2010
...well, there would be a number of breeds that'd concern me - this one just happens to be towards the top of that list. We live in Chicago so there's not much room to make such accomodations - and I'm guessing she'd not be too keen on going to all the expense in either case. Funny thing is... my daughter's best friend also goes to that daycare & lives nearby. We've hung out with her parents - gone on field trips, parties, etc... they're great people. They've got a full on pit bull at their home & THAT dog makes me VERY nervous... I've gone over there a couple times w/ my daughter & it's sort of penned up (sometimes) with a not so great gate or something... Sure, it seems nice enough inasmuch as it hasn't overtly acted aggressive - but it's just SO powerful - and has a look in its eye that I just don't trust. Thing is though... people get very defensive about their dogs, especially advocates of that particular breed - and I understand that - they ARE family... so I would expect ANYone to react quite negatively to my expressing such concerns. In fact, I've got a hunch they may have helped encourage this purchase (but I could be way off there). Anyway, we've sort of avoided the at-home 'playdate' thing pretty well - but if we end up switching because of this dog - well guess what, NOW my daughter's best friend's parents are not ONLY going to be upset that they're not going to be able to play together during the day... but once they find out why - well, my guess is that they'd put two & two together reacting pretty defensively relative to their OWN pit bull. Since dogs are so intertwined with our family units, I think we naturally tend to regard them as such - and so I would expect I'd be seen as some kind of 'bigot' due to my concerns. And it might sound crazy - but I think there's chance they might even think that since I'm stereotyping their dog - maybe I'm harboring similar stereotypes about THEM (as they happen to be of a different race). Again, one would HOPE people wouldn't look into things so much & maybe I'm thinking too much on the matter myself, but you never know. Granted, that's just something I'd have to accept when faced with the choice of safety for my children vs social acceptance by some - but still... as a former dog owner, I can tell you I'D have a problem with anybody who didn't trust or like my dog - so how could I not expect anyone else to feel that way? Anyway, I suppose I'll have to craft some diplomatic ways of expressing these concerns & hope for the best.
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Unregistered 01:23 PM 11-12-2010
Have you spoken with the other day care parents in the group? If so, do they all feel the same way about the dog? If that's the case, maybe you could speak with the provider as a group to voice your concerns. I would think if she were approached by all or many of you, she would understand that her business could be at risk if every up and leaves and maybe she'll decide to give up the dog. If you all express concern together as a group, none of you has to feel like the "jerk" who made her give up her dog. You can look at it for what it is: a business owner who is making a decision to protect her business. The fact that she was so hesitant about answering your questions about the dog and avoided telling you it was part pitbull says to me she knows how uncomfortable her day care parents would be. She still made the decision to take the dog so it shouldn't come as a suprise to her that parents might be concerned about the safety of their kids. Although it's her house and she ultimately gets to decide what pets to have in that house, she also chose to provide child care to the public and in my opinion, she should have done the responsible thing by discussing this with all of you and taking your concerns into consideration before making a decision that could affect the safety of your kids.

If you're the only one who has concerns and everyone else is okay with the dog being there, then you don't have a lot of choice other than to look elsewhere for care. I know you like this provider but it isn't worth the daily worry you will go through if you leave your children in her care. It may take a little effort to find someone you like just as much but I'll bet you'll find her and not having to worry about your kids will be a godsend.
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MyAngels 07:21 AM 11-13-2010
I love dogs, but I definitely feel like your concerns are valid, no matter what the breed of the dog turns out to be. If you have any thoughts of staying with this provider you are going to have to sit down with her and discuss, in depth, her plan with this dog. I would try to do it at a time when she doesn't have the daycare kids there, maybe set up an appointment in the evening. If she's as good as you say she is, she won't have a problem having a frank discussion with you on this. It's possible that she just didn't think this decision through ahead of time.

I used to have an awesome pointer, she was gentle and loving, the sweetest thing you could possibly imagine, but one day, when one of my daycare parents dropped by unexpectedly while we were on a walk and opened my front door (I have an open door policy at all times), the dog went crazy, barking and snapping, and scared the poor mother to death. Obviously my dog was just protecting her home, but this just shows that, when it comes right down to it, dogs are animals and can behave unexpectedly, no matter what their temperament (or breed) is.
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Unregistered 08:42 PM 11-13-2010
Seems to me that depending on your state, the daycare may be obligated to have let you know first. Call licensing anonymously to find out on this and about breeds. Some breeds, even mixes, are banned in certain cities/counties. If she's not obligated and they aren't banned, because you love this daycare, schedule a face to face conference with her to ask her point blank if the dog is a pit mix. If she confirms, then voice your concern and label it concern and see what she says and go from there. If she refuses to get rid of the dog, then give her notice and pull your child immediately for safety reasons - this way, you'll have no regrets should something happen during the notice period. You should be able to find temp care while you search out the perfect care. You may have to pay double for 2 weeks of child care, but that's worth the peace of mind you'll have ensuring your child's safety.
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Unregistered 09:00 AM 11-16-2010
What? Are you crazy you said in so many words she should of asked you guys first HAHAHAHA its HER home NOT just a daycare and its up to HER no one else if she wants to get a dog. I do think AFTER she got the dog she should of sent out a letter just in case any kids have any allgeries to dogs but not because of the kids safety, get a grip.
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DanceMom 12:19 PM 11-16-2010
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
What? Are you crazy you said in so many words she should of asked you guys first HAHAHAHA its HER home NOT just a daycare and its up to HER no one else if she wants to get a dog. I do think AFTER she got the dog she should of sent out a letter just in case any kids have any allgeries to dogs but not because of the kids safety, get a grip.
Oh Ouch..yes it is HER home and up to HER but she is running a business out of her home - she has clients, parents and kids that are in her home for numerous hours everyday - it is RESPECTFUL to let your DCparents know and weight in about the provider getting ANY pet.

When we were thinking of getting a dog, I wanted to pass it by my families first - get their "approval" A dog is not worth a lost client in my opinion. The DOG doesnt pay the bills....
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MrSint 02:12 PM 11-16-2010
Sure, it's HER home - so she can - and DID purchase an animal that IMO poses a safety risk for small children, including my two daughters. You're right in that at least according to the laws of IL - it IS up to HER. Of course, what IS up to ME (and any other parents that may share the same concern) is to take MY business elsewhere. So, she can have her dog... and somebody else can have my money - that grip enough for you?
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Preschool/daycare teacher 03:49 PM 11-16-2010
I would think that the provider should have at least notified the parents to make sure none of the children have any allergies. And especially after getting the dog.
Mr Stint, have you talked to the provider yet to see where the dog is kept during daycare hours? Like someone mentioned, maybe the dog is some place where it couldn't possibly get loose? I would hope that's the case... Have her show you where it will be and ask how she's going to make sure it doesn't get near the children. I would not be mad if a parent came to me, politely expressing their concern and asking to see where my dog would be kept and what I'm using to keep it seperate. It just shows you're a responsible parent, protecting your child. I would want my parents to let me know of any concerns before they decided to terminate. If, after seeing where the dog is kept, you still don't feel any better about it, then you would have to make a decision, but in the meantime I personally wouldn't worry about what decision to make (unless your children will be at daycare before you are able to see where the dog is kept).
Let us know what you find out and decide to do.
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Live and Learn 04:35 PM 11-16-2010
I am a daycare provider and have never sent my own kids to day care but if I had needed to a pit bull would be a deal breaker for me. I own a large dog myself....not allowed around daycare kids ever. Give provider your two weeks notice but never take your child back there. I personally question the good judgement of a provider who thinks that it would be ok to get a pit bull and tell the day care parents after the fact.
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QualiTcare 12:20 AM 11-17-2010
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
What? Are you crazy you said in so many words she should of asked you guys first HAHAHAHA its HER home NOT just a daycare and its up to HER no one else if she wants to get a dog. I do think AFTER she got the dog she should of sent out a letter just in case any kids have any allgeries to dogs but not because of the kids safety, get a grip.
if she expects to be given notice when parents terminate, she should've given notice before getting a dog (ANY dog) but especially a dog known to be aggressive. i have a dog, but my son has also been bitten by a dog (and i was always skeptical even before that) but that just reinforced my opinion that even the most tamed animals are UNPREDICTABLE. and of course when it happened to my son, the famous words, "he's NEVER done that before" were used. i let parents know right away that i had a dog (and she's 10 pounds) and i kept her away at all times. if my child care provider got a pit bull, the pit's first day would be my child's last - and i'd dare her to ask me to pay for two weeks. so, yes, she can get one if she wants, but not without consequence.
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nannyde 03:29 AM 11-17-2010
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Sure, it's HER home - so she can - and DID purchase an animal that IMO poses a safety risk for small children, including my two daughters. You're right in that at least according to the laws of IL - it IS up to HER. Of course, what IS up to ME (and any other parents that may share the same concern) is to take MY business elsewhere. So, she can have her dog... and somebody else can have my money - that grip enough for you?
Is she really cheap day care for two kids?
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Crystal 06:21 AM 11-17-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Is she really cheap day care for two kids?
WHY does this matter? What's the point?
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missnikki 07:18 AM 11-17-2010
It seems to be very obvious to me,

She changed the dynamic of the program you were happy with. Now you are not. She has made a decision to obligate herself to raise a puppy and simultaneoulsy watch children. I personally do not see how that is possible.

As far as the other family. I think that the diplomatic thing to do here is to tell them that you have something you have been contemplating, and that you haven't been able to rectify it- that dogs make you nervous around your daughter. You have been testing it out and you just cannot avoid this awkward request.
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MrSint 07:20 AM 11-17-2010
Thanks for the responses... It seems the best course of action would be to see if any other parents have similar concerns - perhaps we can all relay them as a group so to speak. What's funny is that the dad of my daughters best friend (also in the same daycare) who owns a pit bull came by last night.... so we casually asked him - hey, did you see the DC owner's new puppy? His response? "...yeah, it's a pit bull!" Not that I needed any confirmation but it still irks me the dog was presented soley as a 'weimaraner mix' upon inquiry. What's more - and to my earlier point - I'm about twice as big as the DC owner - and this guy is a lot stronger than ME - yet his OWN pit bull that was with him was able to push by him & right into our house - AND even was able to push open the door AGAIN once we got him back outside. Even HE said - yeah... we don't want him to come in with that new baby. So I just can't trust whatever system she may have in place to try & always keep the dog separate. At SOME point it'll get by her, her own kids, her helpers or whatever barrier she may have in place & come in contact with the kids... Like I said, we have REALLY enjoyed this DC provider & think she does a great job. We'll see how she responds to our/others' concerns - but honestly, I do think it shows a lack of judgement to even purchase this animal given the nature of the business she's running. I also think it shows a lack of consideration in not so much as informing anyone about it - if only for allergy reasons. The dog's still a little puppy so we've got some time to find alternative care - but it won't be easy. It's comparatively cheap to other places we checked out - but still not 'cheap' by any means...
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countrymom 09:47 AM 11-17-2010
in ontario we have a law about pit bulls now. But as a business owner that deals with children, its really really bad judgement on her part. As a parent I would be afraid to let my children be where there is a pit bull, and if this is a "new" pet, she has no idea how the animal is going to react to the children and how is she going to take care of your children and train the dog at the same time. I would look else where for care and just mention your concerns. I have children who came from another provider who had a boxer, well she said up front that because its her home the dog has free rein of the house, even in the play room where the kids were, the problem was, was that the dog would chase the kids around or nip at them or bark at them and then the kids started getting in trouble by her because she started blaming the kids for the dog acting up. (I own, a cat, guinea pig, a hamster and right now a dead fish which will be replaced today shhhhh, my dd doesn't know)
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Unregistered 04:16 PM 11-17-2010
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Sure, it's HER home - so she can - and DID purchase an animal that IMO poses a safety risk for small children, including my two daughters. You're right in that at least according to the laws of IL - it IS up to HER. Of course, what IS up to ME (and any other parents that may share the same concern) is to take MY business elsewhere. So, she can have her dog... and somebody else can have my money - that grip enough for you?
Im sure she would want you to go somwhere else if you are SO afraid a dog will attack your child you know kids cant live a bubble forever
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Daycare_Mama 05:24 PM 11-17-2010
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
What? Are you crazy you said in so many words she should of asked you guys first HAHAHAHA its HER home NOT just a daycare and its up to HER no one else if she wants to get a dog. I do think AFTER she got the dog she should of sent out a letter just in case any kids have any allgeries to dogs but not because of the kids safety, get a grip.
I don't think he ever said that she had to "ask" him first. But the common sense, morally right thing to do would be to at least inform parents that you are going to buy a dog (no matter what breed it is). Parents may choose your home specifically because it doesn't have pets or because they are fine with the pets that are there, but that's a pretty big aspect of a family home to not at least inform your daycare families about.

I provide daycare and have 3 dogs of my own.. 2 little yorkie/maltese mixes and 1 black lab. All 3 are amazing with kids and the kids love them. But anyone who interviews knows that I have dogs and they decide if they are comfortable with that. I love animals and I would pull my daughter out of a daycare if they got a pit or pit mix too, especially without letting me know they would be getting a dog.

I agree with other posters, I think you should call licensing for your county and see what rules she has to report such a change in her house to you, if any. Not because it will make her change her mind, but it would show that you've looked into the issue. Either way, I don't think it's your job to advise her that she maybe needs to reconsider having a dog. But it is your job to tell her you no longer feel comfortable sending your child to her house. She should know the reason you are leaving, because it was rude of her to not inform you of this big change to her house where YOUR kids spend their days.
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nannyde 04:00 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by Crystal:
WHY does this matter? What's the point?
I'm just trying to figure out why the OP values it.

I see their friends kid goes there but they have obviously had years of their friendship together where they haven't had their kids in the same day care.

So I don't see the value of the day care. If it's really cheap for two kids then I get it.

I see he says it's very affordable but that's different to me than really cheap. If it's really cheap (like two for the price of one) then I can see why he's trying to figure out how to have his kids go there and have the dog not be there.

Just askin... cuz it doesn't make sense to me.
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QualiTcare 04:06 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I'm just trying to figure out why the OP values it.

I see their friends kid goes there but they have obviously had years of their friendship together where they haven't had their kids in the same day care.

So I don't see the value of the day care. If it's really cheap for two kids then I get it.

I see he says it's very affordable but that's different to me than really cheap. If it's really cheap (like two for the price of one) then I can see why he's trying to figure out how to have his kids go there and have the dog not be there.

Just askin... cuz it doesn't make sense to me.
it could be because most people want their kids in a stable environment, and after going there for awhile, his kid probably has formed a bond with the provider. it's not good to switch kids around and if at all possible, he doesn't want to.

i can see why he's trying to figure out if the dog can be there. it would suck for him to pull his child out, put her in a new place, and then find out a week later that the old provider got rid of the dog bc she wasn't supposed to have it or even because other parents confronted her.
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nannyde 04:14 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Thanks for the responses... It seems the best course of action would be to see if any other parents have similar concerns - perhaps we can all relay them as a group so to speak.


If one of my day care parents went to "see if the other parents had similiar concerns" and attempted to "rally them as a group" then that parent would find his day care contract termed THAT day.

This isn't a democracy at my house. Any parent who would intentionally discuss with other day care parents something they wanted changed at my house and attempted to use the other parents agreement to sway me into changing something would be GONE that day.

Now if they wanted to "rally" together to give me an unexpected paid week off or rally together to donate a grand to a playground fund or rally together to give me a raise then RALLY AWAY day care parents...

But to rally to get me to change something in the day care.

Ahhh NO.

That would be extremely disrespectful and would end our great working relationship. Coming to me singly for any concern would be met with open ears. Coming to me after involving other day care parents in your concern would net me watching your backside walk out of my business that day that minute. The first whiff I got that you talked to my other clients would be the end of the conversation.
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nannyde 04:18 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
it could be because most people want their kids in a stable environment, and after going there for awhile, his kid probably has formed a bond with the provider. it's not good to switch kids around and if at all possible, he doesn't want to.

i can see why he's trying to figure out if the dog can be there. it would suck for him to pull his child out, put her in a new place, and then find out a week later that the old provider got rid of the dog bc she wasn't supposed to have it or even because other parents confronted her.
I didn't get the sense that he had been there very long at all. Must have missed that.
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QualiTcare 04:32 AM 11-18-2010
nanny, he said that his friends child went to the daycare also. when my kids were in daycare, two of my closest friends had children there and i honestly knew probably a dozen more parents that i went to HS with or just knew and we would talk all the time either at the daycare or out in public.

it's not like he's going to look in the phone book and stalk facebook to try and find the phone numbers of clients he doesn't know.

but if the other parents are concerned, i don't see the problem approaching it as a group - meaning all of the parents speak up - that doesn't mean they all have to march in holding hands with picket signs. i could see myself saying, "i was talking to judy and jan and we're all concerned about ......"
and then when judy goes in she would say, "did qualit talk to you about ..." there would be nothing weird bc everyone knows we're friends.

there is power in numbers. if one parent is worried about the dog and it's not against licensing then that parent may not bother speaking up bc she's not going to do anything. BUT if 3 or 4 parents are concerned then she might worry about losing the kids and $$$ and get rid of it. either way, one person can't be blamed for her getting rid of the dog because it would be something the whole group wanted.

anyway, she's an idiot for doing such a thing without notice. what if a kid or parent was allergic? what if a parent didn't like pit bulls being around their child? they should've had the option to go elsewhere BEFORE the dog showed up.
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nannyde 04:45 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
nanny, he said that his friends child went to the daycare also. when my kids were in daycare, two of my closest friends had children there and i honestly knew probably a dozen more parents that i went to HS with or just knew and we would talk all the time either at the daycare or out in public.

it's not like he's going to look in the phone book and stalk facebook to try and find the phone numbers of clients he doesn't know.

but if the other parents are concerned, i don't see the problem approaching it as a group - meaning all of the parents speak up - that doesn't mean they all have to march in holding hands with picket signs. i could see myself saying, "i was talking to judy and jan and we're all concerned about ......"
and then when judy goes in she would say, "did qualit talk to you about ..." there would be nothing weird bc everyone knows we're friends.

there is power in numbers. if one parent is worried about the dog and it's not against licensing then that parent may not bother speaking up bc she's not going to do anything. BUT if 3 or 4 parents are concerned then she might worry about losing the kids and $$$ and get rid of it. either way, one person can't be blamed for her getting rid of the dog because it would be something the whole group wanted.

anyway, she's an idiot for doing such a thing without notice. what if a kid or parent was allergic? what if a parent didn't like pit bulls being around their child? they should've had the option to go elsewhere BEFORE the dog showed up.
I agree she's a fool for doing it. I don't like those kinds of dogs cuz they scare me.

I don't ask day care parents about whether or not I can have a dog. I can look on the kids file and see allergies and nobody here is allergic to dogs. I just got a puppy less than a week ago and didn't say a word to them.

I know they have one friend who goes there but that's not what he was referring to when he said "rally" the parents. He already discussed it with THAT friend. He was specifically talking about the other parents.

I would not tolerate my parents teaming up to get something changed no matter what it was (unless it was to give me more money). It would show a poor business plan and would show that the parents didn't understand their place in my business. It would be disrespectful and just wouldn't fly.

I don't do power in numbers. I'm the power here. It's my business and my home. I have to be the leader all the time. It doesn't work for me otherwise. Any decision I make is for the best of my business so I wouldn't be interested in a group opinion on anything I had decided.

But that's just me. His provider may welcome a group opinion orchestrated by and brought to her by her clients. He knows her and she may well like that and really appreciate it.
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MrSint 06:46 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I agree she's a fool for doing it. I don't like those kinds of dogs cuz they scare me.

I don't ask day care parents about whether or not I can have a dog. I can look on the kids file and see allergies and nobody here is allergic to dogs. I just got a puppy less than a week ago and didn't say a word to them.

I know they have one friend who goes there but that's not what he was referring to when he said "rally" the parents. He already discussed it with THAT friend. He was specifically talking about the other parents.

I would not tolerate my parents teaming up to get something changed no matter what it was (unless it was to give me more money). It would show a poor business plan and would show that the parents didn't understand their place in my business. It would be disrespectful and just wouldn't fly.

I don't do power in numbers. I'm the power here. It's my business and my home. I have to be the leader all the time. It doesn't work for me otherwise. Any decision I make is for the best of my business so I wouldn't be interested in a group opinion on anything I had decided.

But that's just me. His provider may welcome a group opinion orchestrated by and brought to her by her clients. He knows her and she may well like that and really appreciate it.
To respond to a few questions raised - yes, my main desire is to maintain a stable environment for my child with a provider we've known & used a while - thus far successfully - not to mention all the friendships my daughter has forged and good relationships we have formed with other parents. Sure, it's comparatively affordable - but it's more a matter of those issues and the UNknown relative to any alternatives. And yes, since this is a home daycare in the neighborhood - like the previous poster noted, most of the other parents are also from the neighborhood that we either know personally or with whom have other such ties. And over time, there are the offsite birthday parties, playdates, etc... where we've come to know the rest outside of the actual daycare. I suppose you must be in a fortunate position where you can dictate a heavy handed attitude/policy of 'I'm the power here - my way or the highway - this is not a democracy' without apparently having to face any loss of business as a result - or perhaps you've not had such conflicts arise where potentially negative responses can get 'vetted out' so to speak. I would hope there's not much daycare supply in your area because I can tell you that if any parent in our daycare group were to have their child terminated for discussing legitimate concerns about the daycare with us and/or other parents - that would provide significant incentive for us & others to find alternative care from a provider we might view as less capricious, vindictive and/or have a generally more stable/appreciative philosophy as it relates to customer service. Besides, it strikes me as unrealistic to expect parents won't discuss daycare issues amongst themselves & resorting to such Draconian measures to prevent it might be cause for concern in and of itself. But, if you can carry on this way & be successful in your business... more power to you.

But let's say I DON'T discuss anything w/ the other parents... we have a nice chat with the daycare provider - maybe a few 'sorry you feel that way' statements are made - we leave - besides, from the DCP's perspective, it's only a couple kids right? Well, many of the other parents WILL end up asking us why we left - still others will discuss it with other parents we may not know so well - people will surely starting thinking hmmmm.... pit bull eh? And maybe a few more end up dropping off - and maybe she has more difficulty replacing those openings. If this IS or will become a concern for a number of her current/potential clients - it's probably better for her to know so now versus by piece meal where she may experience significant loss of revenue. And I'm open to the possibility that I may well be alone in my concerns... Let's face it - I jumped on HERE to get some outside perspective on the matter - do you really think it's unreasonable that I might seek opinions from other parents as well? IMO, to NOT do so would be irresponsible.
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QualiTcare 08:48 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I agree she's a fool for doing it. I don't like those kinds of dogs cuz they scare me.

I don't ask day care parents about whether or not I can have a dog. I can look on the kids file and see allergies and nobody here is allergic to dogs. I just got a puppy less than a week ago and didn't say a word to them.

I know they have one friend who goes there but that's not what he was referring to when he said "rally" the parents. He already discussed it with THAT friend. He was specifically talking about the other parents.

I would not tolerate my parents teaming up to get something changed no matter what it was (unless it was to give me more money). It would show a poor business plan and would show that the parents didn't understand their place in my business. It would be disrespectful and just wouldn't fly.

I don't do power in numbers. I'm the power here. It's my business and my home. I have to be the leader all the time. It doesn't work for me otherwise. Any decision I make is for the best of my business so I wouldn't be interested in a group opinion on anything I had decided.

But that's just me. His provider may welcome a group opinion orchestrated by and brought to her by her clients. He knows her and she may well like that and really appreciate it.
i know he only mentioned one friend, but what i meant, and what he just confirmed is that he could very well know other parents personally also. talking to your friends about something going on at daycare that concerns your children is different than "rallying clients." if he were stopping people in the parking lot/driveway or seeking them out - that would be rallying.

you said you got a puppy less than a week ago and didn't ask the parents. umm, don't you already have a dog? that makes a slight difference when someone that already has a dog gets a puppy. this is someone with no dogs who went straight to a baby eating breed. that along with the fact that clients have somehow relinquished any and all power and brain cells they once had changes the game.

if you agree she's a fool for doing it why not just agree she's a fool for doing it! you're like i wouldn't put up with parents confronting me about a decision blah blah. umm, hopefully you wouldn't make such an idiotic decision and if you did have several parents questioning something you would have enough sense to know that there must be a problem.

nan - friends team up to try and get things changed all the time. really, you of all people should know this.
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laundrymom 08:54 AM 11-18-2010
My advice,.. =-)

ok, honest question here, I skimmed through most responses I admit but I read you love the daycare, you love her program, her devotion to the kids, everything except for the puppy that is a part pit? part Weim,.. umm,.. sp? lol,.. you know the beautiful sesame street dog, lol.

so you love her and how she is helping to raise your daighters,.. you love her environment and her attention to her business,.. but you are angry that her new puppy that she is raising in probably the same manner as she does your kids, and who you have seen NO aggression in whatsoever, may turn on your kids and bite them even though she is keeping the dog seperate from the daycare? I would honestly go to her, say,.. hey I love your place, I love the care you provide, but the new pup concerns me,.. Im afriad of pit bulls. I was not aware that you were considering a dog let alone this particular mix of breeds. Why did you choose "this" dog, and how can you assure me that it will be a safe playmate for my children? I have to be honest with you, I am uncomfortable with the idea of a pitbull mix, no matter the mix in a childcare home and am wanting you to know that I am leaning towards looking for alternative care. While I respect your choice to have a dog, and have this dog, you must respect my choice to have childcare without one. I wanted you to know up front how I feel to minimize any hard feelings, or surprises that may come about. I also want you to be prepared in case other parents react the same way. I respect you as a provider and want to make sure you are aware of my feelings.
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nannyde 10:44 AM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
i know he only mentioned one friend, but what i meant, and what he just confirmed is that he could very well know other parents personally also. talking to your friends about something going on at daycare that concerns your children is different than "rallying clients." if he were stopping people in the parking lot/driveway or seeking them out - that would be rallying.

you said you got a puppy less than a week ago and didn't ask the parents. umm, don't you already have a dog? that makes a slight difference when someone that already has a dog gets a puppy. this is someone with no dogs who went straight to a baby eating breed. that along with the fact that clients have somehow relinquished any and all power and brain cells they once had changes the game.

if you agree she's a fool for doing it why not just agree she's a fool for doing it! you're like i wouldn't put up with parents confronting me about a decision blah blah. umm, hopefully you wouldn't make such an idiotic decision and if you did have several parents questioning something you would have enough sense to know that there must be a problem.

nan - friends team up to try and get things changed all the time. really, you of all people should know this.
I sure the heck wouldn't get a pit bull. They are very scary to me and I know I couldn't handle that. They are cute puppies tho. I would like to snuggle one of them today.

The point I'm making is that the power the parent has is only his power. He shouldn't be considering discussing it with her as a group. He needs to take his concern to her and discuss it only with her. He shouldn't enlist the other clients. It's his kid and his money so he has that power to let her know what he wants. If she says she wants to keep the puppy then he needs to ease on down the road.

I can see his friends talking about it with him but to even bring it up to the other day care clients would really turn me off.

Something about this doesn't seem right and I can't put my finger on it. I'm not understanding the value of the provider thing. It just seems odd that on day one of seeing the puppy that he wouldn't just say "NO pitt bull dogs at my kids day care period". NOT having it. I don't want my kid and my new baby on the same property as a pit bull.

What gives that he can't just SAY it to them? The only thing that would make a parent not say something like that... to me... is money.

I guess I just don't see how this is so delicate. He's one of a zillion people who are afraid of pit bulls mixed with babies. It's not that big of a deal to bring it up. Just bring it up and tell her how you feel.
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Unregistered 11:19 AM 11-18-2010
Just my thoughts...I have dogs and I have never considered asking a daycare parent first. However, I am not an idiot and I do realize that:

a) some parents may choose not to come here because I have dogs and
b) BREED MATTERS.

When we got our indoor dogs I did considerable research to get the "right" daycare dog. No shedding, sturdy, good with kids...I have Teddy Bear dogs (Bicon x Shih Tzu cross). When I introduced the puppy (and later, the 2nd puppy) I was straightforward with the parents regarding the dogs strenghts and how it would be daycare trained.

In my opinion, it is obvious that she knows people might be upset because she went out of her way not to be clear on the breed. She is probably also aware that some people may leave because of it, and has decided to go ahead with it anyway. That is her decision, and while none of us may agree with it from a business standpoint, it is her business and she is free to screw it up as she sees fit.

That said, if I ever found out my parents were getting together to "discuss concerns" behind my back, legitimately or not, that would be the end of whomever I determined the ring leader to be. Why? Well, lets see...it worked on the dog so whats not to say that next month you are all concerned that she is closed on Christmas Eve or the month after that you are all concerned about the menu plan?

Uhhh NO...you gotta problem, to talk to ME. After all, how happy would you be if, I as a concerned daycare provider, gathered the parents up to discuss a legitimate concern regarding your child... and then as a group we confronted you? Would you feel defensive? Attacked? Your privacy violated? Perhaps a betrayal of the relationship? My guess is YES and thats a two way street. Tread carefully if you choose to go that route.

3kidsmom
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Unregistered 11:25 AM 11-18-2010
I am the type of person that doesn't like to feel like I'm being pushed around by anyone. I would not take being ambushed by the parents of my daycare kids well at all. If I am approached respectfully by parents, then I am much more receptive. I'm always willing to hear parents out and I've been lucky enough to feel comfortable discussing issues that have come up with the parents, too.

OP, if you were a parent of a child in my care and you decided to rally the other parents to force me to change the way that I do things, then you would be packing your things and leaving that day. I wouldn't feel comfortable with a parent with a child in my care if I knew that any time that the going got tough, the parent would form an alliance with other parents to make me bend to their will.

It's all a matter of the way that a person is approached.
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MrSint 12:26 PM 11-18-2010
There are a number of delicate issues at hand here. First, people can get very defensive should they perceive their judgement or rights being called into question as a business owner - especially where the safety of children is concerned. Frankly, I'd be hard pressed to provide a more apt case in point than your responses thus far. So if not handled properly, I could find myself suddenly without ANY daycare - and that'd be a problem. Secondly, this is where my child spends her days - and perhaps my newbord daughter in a few months. Switching daycares is not like buying a bag of Doritos, it's a delicate matter indeed. I'll certainly bring it up to her - in a diplomatic way a a previous poster graciously illustrated (thanks btw) - but if it turns out the other parents also share those same concerns & can relay them as well - then I'm not just an isolated case, but perhaps representative of a good number of current and/or potential clients - in which case she may decide - as you stated yourself - that this was an ill fated decision on her part.
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QualiTcare 12:32 PM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I sure the heck wouldn't get a pit bull. They are very scary to me and I know I couldn't handle that. They are cute puppies tho. I would like to snuggle one of them today.

The point I'm making is that the power the parent has is only his power. He shouldn't be considering discussing it with her as a group. He needs to take his concern to her and discuss it only with her. He shouldn't enlist the other clients. It's his kid and his money so he has that power to let her know what he wants. If she says she wants to keep the puppy then he needs to ease on down the road.

I can see his friends talking about it with him but to even bring it up to the other day care clients would really turn me off.

Something about this doesn't seem right and I can't put my finger on it. I'm not understanding the value of the provider thing. It just seems odd that on day one of seeing the puppy that he wouldn't just say "NO pitt bull dogs at my kids day care period". NOT having it. I don't want my kid and my new baby on the same property as a pit bull.

What gives that he can't just SAY it to them? The only thing that would make a parent not say something like that... to me... is money.

I guess I just don't see how this is so delicate. He's one of a zillion people who are afraid of pit bulls mixed with babies. It's not that big of a deal to bring it up. Just bring it up and tell her how you feel.
i agree. if it were me or you, we'd probably have just said something the minute we saw the dog - but obviously you and i have no problems saying what we think. some people do.

i think the idea of "rallying the parents" is being taken the wrong way.

i was friends with parents at my kid's daycare. we hung out, went out to eat, went to each other's homes for cookouts, etc. we went to school together since elementary and then our children were friends. talking about something with your friends that bothers you about the daycare and then approaching the provider individually is still being united, but not confronting as a group.

for example, my daughter had mentioned that her teacher was mean during naptime and would cover the kid's heads with a blanket (not hers, but others). yes, i understand you have to be strict at naptime, but i worked there and i witnessed her being MEAN and covering heads - not just strict. one of my friends whose child was in that class brought it up to me and said she was going to say something to the director. her sister (and another friend of mine) had already said something to her bc her child was in that class also. i said something not only bc my child was in that class, but bc i was an employee who had actually witnessed it. it would've been easy to shrug off one parent and take the teacher's word, but it's not easy to shrug it off as an exaggerating child when there are 3 parents and one of them has seen it in action. as i said, there is power in numbers. there was no ring leader - just friends who all felt the same way.

i do think he should just say something (and probably have another provider lined up when he does) but i'm not him.

question: considering that this provider who had no pets when the child started not only got a pet, but a dog known to be aggressive, would you still think he owed her 2 weeks notice/pay?

i don't. i think she should've given the parents two weeks notice before bringing the dog in so they could decide to stay or not if she expected to be given the same courtesy. notice isn't required if there is a safety concern and he obviously feels that there is.

however, mr sint, it has been a week since you posted this thread. if you feel she's in danger, isn't it time to do something?
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nannyde 01:06 PM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
i agree. if it were me or you, we'd probably have just said something the minute we saw the dog - but obviously you and i have no problems saying what we think. some people do.

i think the idea of "rallying the parents" is being taken the wrong way.

i was friends with parents at my kid's daycare. we hung out, went out to eat, went to each other's homes for cookouts, etc. we went to school together since elementary and then our children were friends. talking about something with your friends that bothers you about the daycare and then approaching the provider individually is still being united, but not confronting as a group.

for example, my daughter had mentioned that her teacher was mean during naptime and would cover the kid's heads with a blanket (not hers, but others). yes, i understand you have to be strict at naptime, but i worked there and i witnessed her being MEAN and covering heads - not just strict. one of my friends whose child was in that class brought it up to me and said she was going to say something to the director. her sister (and another friend of mine) had already said something to her bc her child was in that class also. i said something not only bc my child was in that class, but bc i was an employee who had actually witnessed it. it would've been easy to shrug off one parent and take the teacher's word, but it's not easy to shrug it off as an exaggerating child when there are 3 parents and one of them has seen it in action. as i said, there is power in numbers. there was no ring leader - just friends who all felt the same way.

i do think he should just say something (and probably have another provider lined up when he does) but i'm not him.

question: considering that this provider who had no pets when the child started not only got a pet, but a dog known to be aggressive, would you still think he owed her 2 weeks notice/pay?

i don't. i think she should've given the parents two weeks notice before bringing the dog in so they could decide to stay or not if she expected to be given the same courtesy. notice isn't required if there is a safety concern and he obviously feels that there is.

however, mr sint, it has been a week since you posted this thread. if you feel she's in danger, isn't it time to do something?
The dog is still a puppy so I think notice should be given.

I think the day care center analogy is different. It is a public place where each kid may be one percent of the total income or a half percent of the total income. Having parents band together when they are one of MANY is very different than them banding together when they are a small group in the first place.

If I found out my parents were working together to work on me about something I would terminate. It would mean that the relationship I thought we had wasn't really there so caring for their kid in the future wouldn't be right for me.
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MrSint 01:24 PM 11-18-2010
It's a small puppy at this point - I've got time before it gets to any dangerous size.

And to the other posters response, I would expect that if my daughter were doing something that posed a safety risk for other children - and the parents of the other children discussed this amongst themselves & with the DCP - then approached me about it - I would hope to have the maturity, rationality & compassion to appreciate why they had done so & take measures to help resolve the problem if possible. Sure, I supposed I could feel ganged up on, attacked, ambushed, etc... but I generally operate with a level head - that's just me - although experience has taught me that there are many people in this world who do not. As such, I often have to navigate carefully on certain matters so as not to set off the emotionally unstable among us which may negatively affect my wife and/or children.
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MrSint 01:37 PM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:

If I found out my parents were working together to work on me about something I would terminate. It would mean that the relationship I thought we had wasn't really there so caring for their kid in the future wouldn't be right for me.
And if I found out - and in our case, everybody WOULD find out - my DCP had terminated someone because they discussed safety concerns with other parents, I would terminate the DCP. In fact - if you could let me know if you happen to be located in IL perhaps we can make arrangements so as to make sure we avoid accidentally doing business together in the future.
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Blackcat31 01:39 PM 11-18-2010
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
My advice,.. =-)

ok, honest question here, I skimmed through most responses I admit but I read you love the daycare, you love her program, her devotion to the kids, everything except for the puppy that is a part pit? part Weim,.. umm,.. sp? lol,.. you know the beautiful sesame street dog, lol.

so you love her and how she is helping to raise your daighters,.. you love her environment and her attention to her business,.. but you are angry that her new puppy that she is raising in probably the same manner as she does your kids, and who you have seen NO aggression in whatsoever, may turn on your kids and bite them even though she is keeping the dog seperate from the daycare? I would honestly go to her, say,.. hey I love your place, I love the care you provide, but the new pup concerns me,.. Im afriad of pit bulls. I was not aware that you were considering a dog let alone this particular mix of breeds. Why did you choose "this" dog, and how can you assure me that it will be a safe playmate for my children? I have to be honest with you, I am uncomfortable with the idea of a pitbull mix, no matter the mix in a childcare home and am wanting you to know that I am leaning towards looking for alternative care. While I respect your choice to have a dog, and have this dog, you must respect my choice to have childcare without one. I wanted you to know up front how I feel to minimize any hard feelings, or surprises that may come about. I also want you to be prepared in case other parents react the same way. I respect you as a provider and want to make sure you are aware of my feelings.
35 posts later and this is exactly what should be said. Honesty and open communication between a provider and a parent (not group of them). If we all had the honesty and open communication laundrymom has suggested, most of us wouldn't be on this forum venting. I am the owner of a large breed dog with a bad reputation also (St. Bernard) and I personally wouldn't have gone out and got a dog without thinking about the big picture (i.e effects on business and family) but it is done and dog is there so the only logical next step would be open and honest communication between provider and parent. Provider can't fix, modify, ignore or hear complaints or comments until they are said to her and parent can't stay or go until they know where provider is coming from and what if anything she is going to do to address the issue. Dogs are dogs and kids are kids. BOTH are unpredictable in behavior NO MATTER how they are raised (or what breed they are).
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nannyde 02:06 AM 11-19-2010
Originally Posted by MrSint:
And if I found out - and in our case, everybody WOULD find out - my DCP had terminated someone because they discussed safety concerns with other parents, I would terminate the DCP. In fact - if you could let me know if you happen to be located in IL perhaps we can make arrangements so as to make sure we avoid accidentally doing business together in the future.


Oh not to worry. You would have to sit on a long wait list... get thru a gruelling three step five hour interview process... pay a fat amount of money upfront for two kids... and pay a princely sum for care as we aren't affordable.

I think we are both safe.

Seriously it's a BAD move to rally the other clients. If you have a good money gig going there I would just talk to her by yourself.
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QualiTcare 04:30 AM 11-19-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
The dog is still a puppy so I think notice should be given.

I think the day care center analogy is different. It is a public place where each kid may be one percent of the total income or a half percent of the total income. Having parents band together when they are one of MANY is very different than them banding together when they are a small group in the first place.

If I found out my parents were working together to work on me about something I would terminate. It would mean that the relationship I thought we had wasn't really there so caring for their kid in the future wouldn't be right for me.
yeah, a home daycare is different than a center, but the point is the same. in fact, i think if it were a home daycare it would make even more of a difference. what are 3 or 4 kids to a daycare center? not a lot. 3 or 4 kids to a home daycare might be half of the provider's income so it would be harder to just terminate. of course, termination IS the answer for everything.
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nannyde 06:13 AM 11-19-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
yeah, a home daycare is different than a center, but the point is the same. in fact, i think if it were a home daycare it would make even more of a difference. what are 3 or 4 kids to a daycare center? not a lot. 3 or 4 kids to a home daycare might be half of the provider's income so it would be harder to just terminate. of course, termination IS the answer for everything.
Yes QualiT

That's exactly what I'm saying. Because each individual contract is such a high percentage of the income in a home day care it makes it even that much more important that the parents don't RALLY together.

This is why I don't take parents that know each other. I have only made an exception to that once in my 17 years.
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MrSint 06:29 AM 11-19-2010
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Yes QualiT

This is why I don't take parents that know each other. I have only made an exception to that once in my 17 years.
Wow, I was right - you really ARE in a fortunate position to be able to charge really high rates, be so selective on clients you accept, rule with an iron fist & have a long waiting list to boot.

Fair enough - I'll take your warnings under advisement.... but here's one for you. Now, obviously you've got the market - if not cornered, certainly bent over a barrel - and that's great for you or ANY business really. But wherever there's pent up demand, supply can & usually does follow at some point. So if the competitive landscape does change (and it may not) - people may not be so willing to accept your terms as they exist today.
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nannyde 08:20 AM 11-19-2010
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Wow, I was right - you really ARE in a fortunate position to be able to charge really high rates, be so selective on clients you accept, rule with an iron fist & have a long waiting list to boot.

Fair enough - I'll take your warnings under advisement.... but here's one for you. Now, obviously you've got the market - if not cornered, certainly bent over a barrel - and that's great for you or ANY business really. But wherever there's pent up demand, supply can & usually does follow at some point. So if the competitive landscape does change (and it may not) - people may not be so willing to accept your terms as they exist today.
I'm not being contentious with you Mr Sint. You seem like a great Dude. I just think your thoughts to team up with someone would be a big turn off to a little provider. If you were in a Center it might be what it takes to get their attention. If you are in a small group YOU are enough to get their attention.

Just go to her and tell her what you want. I wouldn't want my newborn in a house that has a pitt bull because I AM AFRAID OF THEM. Tell her you are afraid of them and that's that. Don't buy the "keep them separate". I do that every day with my dogs and it is a ton of work with little tiny teddy bear puppies.

You just have to be willing to have her say that she won't do it and will accept your notice. There is a high liklihood that could happen.
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caitlin 01:03 PM 11-20-2010
I haven't read the whole thread, but my first thought is...

If you are trusting her to help raise your daughter and you can't trust her to raise/train a puppy and keep it seperated then I think that you need to reevaluate your daycare decesion.

If she can show you where the pup is going to stay during the day, and the methods she is using to keep the pup seperate from the children I can see no problem with this. However, if she is keeping the pup in a small crate all day, I would be angry. But, if the pup has a fenced off area in the yard to play and is otherwise kept gated in a paticular area of the house I would say "Awesome!"
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Candyland 05:06 AM 12-04-2010
As a parent, I would RUN the other way and look for another place. Yes, you stated that your child is happy there and you love the day care provider, but right now you have hesitations and questions which are perfectly legitimate. How is it all going to pan out if and when something should ever happen to your child or another child and you had these qualms and didn't move on them? Your gut feeling is telling you something.
As a day care teacher, I, myself, would never put my child, another child or myself in "jeopardy" with a pet. I, would love to have a little pet in class (is that even allowed??), but I never have and don't want to be held liable if that cute little pet bits one of my students.

Mr. Slint, there are other wonderful places where your child will be happy and so will you and your wife.
Please let us know of your decision.
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Symphony 01:12 PM 01-26-2011
If you are uncomfortable with the situation, by all means communicate with your provider and let her know your concerns! There isn't much we can do if we aren't aware of the problem. I would never want a family to come here that didn't feel safe. I would also never get a pit bull while being a provider. I do not have a problem with them personally, but I don't think it would be good for business.


That being said, I have two dogs, a 10 year old Doberman and a 2 year old shih tzu. They have NEVER, not once, EVER EVER been in the same vicinity as my daycare children. My little dog spends his days in the master bedroom which is upstairs seperated by two gates from my downstairs where daycare is, (Daycare is almost completely seperate from my family's living space). I carry him, in my arms, outside to potty at naptime. If I have a day where they don't all nap together, he waits till closing. My big dog stays outside all day and when we go outside he goes into the dog run with a 6 foot fence. I open the back door, say "kennel" he runs to the back and I lock it up.


To be perfectly honest, I do all this for my dog's safety! My own 4 kids climb all over them, pull ears and tails, play dentist, etc etc. The poor babies need a break from exploring fingers!

Talk to your provider, she may have more safety measures in place than you are aware of, she may be oblivious to your concerns, or it may be time to part ways. Keeping mum though doesn't solve anything.
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cillybean83 04:29 PM 01-26-2011
I wouldn't involve other parents, because some might freak out that any dog is on the property, others might not care if a pure bred pit bull was laying in their childs lap. What other parents think has nothing to do with what you feel is appropriate for your own children. Personally, I have no issues with any breed, I don't think there are "bad" breeds, but as a daycare provider AND a mother, I wouldn't feel comfortable having my kids around a pit bull, even if it was harmless, because of all the horror stories I've heard...thats just me!

I have a little dog (chihuahua) and we just added a 2nd little dog (Terrier mix) who was introduced to parents and children. We gate off our daycare area so there is no doggy/baby overlap, so it isn't really an issue (our dogs are less than 20 pounds...combined).

If you have a bad feeling about the dog, you should either look around for another provider or have the provider sign something stating that the dog will never be around your children and if you can't trust her to keep up her end of the bargain, then honestly, you shouldn't be trusting her with your kids.

Good luck!
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momatheart 08:59 AM 01-27-2011
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
My advice,.. =-)

ok, honest question here, I skimmed through most responses I admit but I read you love the daycare, you love her program, her devotion to the kids, everything except for the puppy that is a part pit? part Weim,.. umm,.. sp? lol,.. you know the beautiful sesame street dog, lol.

so you love her and how she is helping to raise your daighters,.. you love her environment and her attention to her business,.. but you are angry that her new puppy that she is raising in probably the same manner as she does your kids, and who you have seen NO aggression in whatsoever, may turn on your kids and bite them even though she is keeping the dog seperate from the daycare? I would honestly go to her, say,.. hey I love your place, I love the care you provide, but the new pup concerns me,.. Im afriad of pit bulls. I was not aware that you were considering a dog let alone this particular mix of breeds. Why did you choose "this" dog, and how can you assure me that it will be a safe playmate for my children? I have to be honest with you, I am uncomfortable with the idea of a pitbull mix, no matter the mix in a childcare home and am wanting you to know that I am leaning towards looking for alternative care. While I respect your choice to have a dog, and have this dog, you must respect my choice to have childcare without one. I wanted you to know up front how I feel to minimize any hard feelings, or surprises that may come about. I also want you to be prepared in case other parents react the same way. I respect you as a provider and want to make sure you are aware of my feelings.
I love this way of saying it.
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Unregistered 04:22 AM 02-15-2011
Originally Posted by MrSint:
SO - what do I do? We LOVE the daycare - the other kids/parents - the provider is great. It's convenient - not too expensive - etc... and now THIS. If I voice concerns and they get rid of the dog - well great, now WE'RE the jerks who made them get rid of their precious puppy - probably sending her OWN two kids to tears... I certainly wouldn't want the person watching my kids to hate their parents. I tried to look around to see if there were any laws in IL against this, or insurance issues that I could reference so as to 'help advise' her... I know in California, they'll deny insurance for any injuries caused by certain breeds of dogs... but that's it - and nothing in IL. I'm thinking my only option is to find somewhere else to go - which is going to be challenging & disappointing on many levels. Frankly, I'm ticked that she would even MAKE such a decision without so much as consulting any of her clients - it's a bad business move seeing as I am NOT the only person who would have this concern. Any advice on other options I may not be seeing would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
I personally think you should come out of your bubble and stop being so ignorant. First off this is her home and her family. What she chooses to do on her off time is not your concern. She does not need to ask YOUR permission to get a family pet. Especially if the pet is being kept separate. I would NEVER get rid of a member of MY family over an ignorant daycare parent. You would go before my pet.
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Unregistered 11:39 AM 10-25-2012
you have nothing to worry about. her having a pitbull is just the same as her having a lab. They are just dogs and are absolutly no different then any other dog. switching day cares because they have a pitbull is the same as switching day cares because the assistant is a different race. Those dogs are VERY VERY friendly and lovable and provide an EXTREME amount of proctection. your child couldnt be in a SAFER place. there is NOTHING wrong with the situation at the day care with the dog. and as a pitbull owner it is very offensive that someone would go out of there way to report, switch day cares, and/or make a big scene about someone having a pitbull. its the same as if they had a; lab, poodle, terrier, ect.. just becuase the media has portrayed the pitbull breed to be aggressive and visious does not mean that every single pitbull you see is the same. my pitbulls play with my 1 year old neice perfectly fine and my friends children/babies play with them too. so no offence but that is my opinion. NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
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crazydaycarelady 03:12 PM 10-25-2012
I haven't had time to read all of the responses but wanted to add my 2 cents.

First off I don't think a provider has to consult her clients prior to getting a pet. This is our home too and as long as I make arrangements for the pet so that it does not affect the dc then I think it is the providers business.

Also I think that before you give notice you should talk to the provider. I ask my dcparents to talk to me if they have any concerns and they do. Maybe you can come up with a solution and maybe not but if you like the provider, she does a good job, and your preference would be to stay with her then I think it is only fair to be honest with her about your concerns.
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daycarediva 04:47 PM 10-25-2012
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Thanks - and don't get me wrong... I LOVE dogs - grew up with them - all I can manage is fish for the time being but would love to get our own dog one day. It's just that, IMO, this breed raises particular concerns - and I can't trust how it's going to be raised, what its individual temperment will turn out to be - where it came from - or what it will do. The fact is that in the majority of cases where a dog attack occurs, it's happened 'out of the blue' - where an otherwise saintly animal has a 'bad moment' one day... and surprise! My own parents' terrier had just such a day & snapped at my daughter... but THAT dog is a Yorkie so what's the worst that can happen? Compare that to the firepower of a pit mix & the consequences are exponentially different. Really, ANY dog is a big responsibility - bigger still if you're running a business that cares for small children/babies out of its residence. It's one thing if she had an established dog when we signed up - then we could make that decision... but to bring in an unproven pit mix rescue puppy without so much as a mention? I know it's her right to do as per the current laws - as it is our right to switch daycares - but as we all know, it's not as easy as switching brands of beer here... and if you think I'M upset by all this - boy, you should talk to my wife!
My daughter was attacked by a pit-mix rescued as a puppy. It was a neighbors dog who broke the door down to go after her. She almost lost her life (and is scared for life). I would find another daycare. Bottom line is the safety of your child, if you don't believe that she is safe, then it is up to you to ENSURE that she is.
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daycarediva 04:49 PM 10-25-2012
Also, as a provider, I WILL NOT get a dog. It raises my liability insurance WAY too much AND it IS breed specific. I could not be insured by my current company if I were to get a pitbull (and several other breeds)
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daycaremom76 07:53 PM 10-25-2012
I am a daycare provider with a 100lb American Bulldog (looks exactly like a pit) a yorkie and a shih-tzu. I believe that any dog can be a loving dog. That being said I am aware that my clientel is limited because of my choice to have dogs and the breed of dogs I have. Whenever I have a new parent interview the first thing they do is meet my dogs so that way we don't waste another second of each others time and I have lost new parents because of my ABD. As a responsible dog owner and provider I would never add another dog (or cat) to my home w/o giving my DCPs advance notice that one was coming. Adding another dog to the household does effect my business and I would want to give enough notice that if someone didn't want their child their with that dog that they would be able to leave w/o concern. If I was a parent I would want my provider to give advance notice before adding any type of dog to the center.
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clep 10:21 AM 10-26-2012
I have three mini dachshunds, one pit mix, one cat, two snakes, one bearded dragon and two leopard gekos. I used to have one whole floor of reptiles ranging from chameleons to basilisks to tegus.

My day home is on a separate floor away from my pets and my pets do not roam free at all during day home hours. My dogs are behind a closed door and other pets are in their cages. Well the cat roams free. I saw a post earlier from someone that stated there is no possible way to separate the pets from the day home consistently without accidental contact, but I have done that for five years. I have NEVER had accidental contact with one of my pets ever with a day home child or parent. It is about being a responsible pet owner and day care provider.

My parents trust me completely. They trust my judgement with their precious children in all aspects. I consult with them concerning every person in my home, but not about my pets, since my pets do not come in contact.

The parents did ask at one point if I could start exposing their children to the pets in a controlled environment for the experiences, so I do from time to time. Only one dog can come into the day home space at a time and only if they are tethered to me at all times. It is easy to do.

We have done units on dogs, cats and reptiles. They have loved them all and have had parent/child interaction times so the parents can see all the awesome pets we have.

On another note, I am astonished by the black and white thinking of some, By the breed discrimination, and lack of knowledge in this area. I am saddened that pets are held responsible for the behaviors created by the poor skills of their owners.....just like I am saddened by the children that are held responsible for the behaviors created by a lack of parenting skills.

Maybe check out KIKOPUP on you tube if any of you want to see the results of positive dog teaching and the results it brings.
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Unregistered 11:05 AM 11-21-2012
Let me start out by letting you know I own a Pit Bull. She loves my kids and is without question the sweetest and most gentle dog I've ever been around.

That being said, they ARE a powerful breed. As with any dog, they can be dangerous if you do not know how to control them.

I would have serious reservations about sending my kids to any daycare that had large dogs without getting to know the dogs and see their temperment first hand.

If you are that worried just put your kids with a different provider. Make up some other excuse. It may be more money and it may be less convenient but your childs safety is worth it.

IMO, if your provider wants to do things right, she will have the puppy around the children every day all the time in order to properly socialize the dog. She'll also need to use that opportunity to teach the dog what behavior is ans is not acceptable with children.
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littlemissmuffet 11:09 AM 11-23-2012
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Hi there - first post. We have our toddler daughter, and soon will have a 3 month old girl placed in daycare run out of a woman's home in Illinois. Recently, my wife noticed as she was leaving a puppy in the back yard that seemed to be pit bull-like in appearance. Anyway, I happened upon the woman who runs the daycare while she was walking said puppy. I used to raise dogs & know a fair amount about them so I asked her first if it was her puppy - she said yes. I then asked what kind it was to which she squeemishly replied 'it's a weimaraner mix'. Well, it indeed had weimaraner, but was unmistakabley mixed with a pit bull - and I'm guessing it was a rescue. She went on to say how she sort of 'introduced' the dog so it knew there were kids around.... but that it was kept separate the entire time, etc... I didn't bring up the fact that it was clearly half pit bull - figured I'd wait to discuss with my wife first.

Before getting to my concerns (if they're not apparent already) - let me just say that I am not interested in debating issues related to this 'misunderstood' breed. I don't want to hear any anectotal stories about specific pit bulls that you have or know that are just the sweetest little cup of warm butter that wouldn't hurt a fly. I don't want to hear about the deadly Pomeranian back in '93 or the vast media conspiracy stereotyping this breed or how it's the 'owners not the dogs' - besides, I don't want to have to trust her or her two tweener boys to be responsible pit mix owners - and over time, there is NO WAY she'd be able to guarantee the dog would remain separated from the kids at all times... at SOME point, it'll squeak by her - jump or push a gate - something - anyone who has owned so much as a Maltese can tell you that - and 'new' encounters with toddlers and babies at face level can go very wrong. Again, I know plenty about dogs... and I know differnet breeds have different tendencies relative to behavior that have been re-inforced thru selective manipulation over time. Pits are not the only breed that would concern me - but they are at the top of my list based in part on the overwhelming statistical data, their historical 'function' which preceded their current 'form', and perhaps most critically - their sheer physical makeup in terms of capacity to inflict severe damage should the unlikely ever occur. Bottom line - I'm not going to be influenced by any anthropromorphic evaluation of this breed relative to some generalized aversion to bigotry - my daughters' safety trumps all.

SO - what do I do? We LOVE the daycare - the other kids/parents - the provider is great. It's convenient - not too expensive - etc... and now THIS. If I voice concerns and they get rid of the dog - well great, now WE'RE the jerks who made them get rid of their precious puppy - probably sending her OWN two kids to tears... I certainly wouldn't want the person watching my kids to hate their parents. I tried to look around to see if there were any laws in IL against this, or insurance issues that I could reference so as to 'help advise' her... I know in California, they'll deny insurance for any injuries caused by certain breeds of dogs... but that's it - and nothing in IL. I'm thinking my only option is to find somewhere else to go - which is going to be challenging & disappointing on many levels. Frankly, I'm ticked that she would even MAKE such a decision without so much as consulting any of her clients - it's a bad business move seeing as I am NOT the only person who would have this concern. Any advice on other options I may not be seeing would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
Either deal with it or leave. Simple. If a parent ever came in my home and voiced their concerns about one of our pets I would reply with "I appreciate your concerns, but this is my home and we don't involve clients in decisions such as whether or not we have a pet/what kind/etc. I understand if you don't want your child around my pet, but please know, I will always choose *MY* family over a daycare family. Sorry. If you choose to leave, please remember to follow policy in regards to notice."
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Scout 11:39 AM 11-23-2012
If you are at all uncomfortable, which I think its pretty clear you are, then I would look for other care. You need peace of mind in where you are leaving your children, not just with who you are leaving them with. I would not want to spend every day worrying about that as a parent. As a provider I would not want one of my parents to either.
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Crazy In Mo 08:54 PM 12-28-2012
I hav had a pit for 11 years and although he is never around my daycare kids I completely trust him 100 times more around kids than my shih-tzu. The whole pit bull topic really just makes me sad! People are so misinformed on the breed!
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frgsonmysox 12:46 PM 03-23-2013
Old thread but worth sharing. Pit bull is NOT a breed.

"”Pit bull” is NOT a breed. It's a generic term often used to describe all dogs with similar traits and characteristics known to the public as "pit bulls." When we use the term “pit bull” here, it should be understood to encompass American Pit Bull Terriers, American Staffordshire Terriers, and Staffordshire Bull Terriers, and mixes of those breeds.

Remember: In most cases, we usually know little about the background of rescue dogs. Since there is no way to know for sure, we recommend following the advice offered by PBRC for any pit bull-type dog. Most of our guidelines are simply basic rules of dog ownership."
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DaisyMamma 06:46 PM 04-25-2013
Originally Posted by MrSint:
Hi there - first post. We have our toddler daughter, and soon will have a 3 month old girl placed in daycare run out of a woman's home in Illinois. Recently, my wife noticed as she was leaving a puppy in the back yard that seemed to be pit bull-like in appearance. Anyway, I happened upon the woman who runs the daycare while she was walking said puppy. I used to raise dogs & know a fair amount about them so I asked her first if it was her puppy - she said yes. I then asked what kind it was to which she squeemishly replied 'it's a weimaraner mix'. Well, it indeed had weimaraner, but was unmistakabley mixed with a pit bull - and I'm guessing it was a rescue. She went on to say how she sort of 'introduced' the dog so it knew there were kids around.... but that it was kept separate the entire time, etc... I didn't bring up the fact that it was clearly half pit bull - figured I'd wait to discuss with my wife first.

Before getting to my concerns (if they're not apparent already) - let me just say that I am not interested in debating issues related to this 'misunderstood' breed. I don't want to hear any anectotal stories about specific pit bulls that you have or know that are just the sweetest little cup of warm butter that wouldn't hurt a fly. I don't want to hear about the deadly Pomeranian back in '93 or the vast media conspiracy stereotyping this breed or how it's the 'owners not the dogs' - besides, I don't want to have to trust her or her two tweener boys to be responsible pit mix owners - and over time, there is NO WAY she'd be able to guarantee the dog would remain separated from the kids at all times... at SOME point, it'll squeak by her - jump or push a gate - something - anyone who has owned so much as a Maltese can tell you that - and 'new' encounters with toddlers and babies at face level can go very wrong. Again, I know plenty about dogs... and I know differnet breeds have different tendencies relative to behavior that have been re-inforced thru selective manipulation over time. Pits are not the only breed that would concern me - but they are at the top of my list based in part on the overwhelming statistical data, their historical 'function' which preceded their current 'form', and perhaps most critically - their sheer physical makeup in terms of capacity to inflict severe damage should the unlikely ever occur. Bottom line - I'm not going to be influenced by any anthropromorphic evaluation of this breed relative to some generalized aversion to bigotry - my daughters' safety trumps all.

SO - what do I do? We LOVE the daycare - the other kids/parents - the provider is great. It's convenient - not too expensive - etc... and now THIS. If I voice concerns and they get rid of the dog - well great, now WE'RE the jerks who made them get rid of their precious puppy - probably sending her OWN two kids to tears... I certainly wouldn't want the person watching my kids to hate their parents. I tried to look around to see if there were any laws in IL against this, or insurance issues that I could reference so as to 'help advise' her... I know in California, they'll deny insurance for any injuries caused by certain breeds of dogs... but that's it - and nothing in IL. I'm thinking my only option is to find somewhere else to go - which is going to be challenging & disappointing on many levels. Frankly, I'm ticked that she would even MAKE such a decision without so much as consulting any of her clients - it's a bad business move seeing as I am NOT the only person who would have this concern. Any advice on other options I may not be seeing would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
That's cute. You think she would keep you over the dog. Haha. She will send you packing.

BTW. Pitbulls are bred to fight other dogs, not kids. They are TAUGHT to attack humans. So a puppy is probably fine.
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DaisyMamma 06:50 PM 04-25-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I personally think you should come out of your bubble and stop being so ignorant. First off this is her home and her family. What she chooses to do on her off time is not your concern. She does not need to ask YOUR permission to get a family pet. Especially if the pet is being kept separate. I would NEVER get rid of a member of MY family over an ignorant daycare parent. You would go before my pet.

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Unregistered 10:52 AM 05-01-2013
If I don't want keep my child with a provider's dog i have to look for other provider. I can't put my rules in her home.
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Unregistered 05:52 PM 05-01-2013
I would be so offended if one of my daycare parents had an issue and tried to rile up the other parents to get me to hear them!!! Obviously you noticed the dog- I'm sure other families have too! If they have an issue hopefully they will be adult enough to bring it up on their own! If the provider hears separately from numerous families then maybe she will re-think her position.
If you love her as much as you say- trust her- talk to her about your concerns- one on one and see if you can come to an understanding... If not then move on-
I personally have 5! Dogs and not one of them is w daycare kids- rarely they will go for a walk with us but otherwise there is no interaction- it is for my dogs protection- not my daycare kids!! It is very possible she has the same thought! People don't teach their children to be respectful of animals and I cannot supervise 100% therefore kids and dogs are kept separate.
I would suggest you take a breath and think if you want this to work out... If you do talk to her one on one with an open mind. If not give your two weeks and move on...
And to whom ever said he shouldn't pay two weeks notice: she clearly stated the dog is not with the daycare kids- so no threat!!
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Unregistered 05:53 PM 05-01-2013
Originally Posted by DaisyMamma:
Yes! Yes! Yes! And AMEN!!!
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Unregistered 05:55 PM 05-01-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered
I personally think you should come out of your bubble and stop being so ignorant. First off this is her home and her family. What she chooses to do on her off time is not your concern. She does not need to ask YOUR permission to get a family pet. Especially if the pet is being kept separate. I would NEVER get rid of a member of MY family over an ignorant daycare parent. You would go before my pet.

Yes! Yes! Yes! And AMEN!!!!
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Laurel 08:45 PM 05-01-2013
In Florida we are required by licensing rules to inform parents of any pets in the home. There is a place to check if there are no pets or a place to check that the parents have been informed about what pets are in the home.

Also my daycare liability insurance does not cover me if I own a pitbull. I am looking at the policy now and this is the exact wording:

Exclusions: For any "bodily injury", "property damage" or "personal injury" caused by, or arising out of any Doberman Pinscher, Akita, German Shepherd, Rottweiler, Pitbull or Bullmastiff owned by, leased to, or in the care, custody or control of any "Insured".

I wouldn't have any child of mine in the home. That said, I found out that a guy my ex DIL was living with, with my grandchildren, had a pitbull. For a year there were no problems. I never knew about it until she had already left him. I was upset but luckily no problems.

Laurel
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Qpmomma 07:04 PM 05-14-2013
As a dog trainer....wow. You are better off finding a DCP with no dog at all.
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Unregistered 10:38 AM 05-19-2013
First, I hate dogs. Just can't stand them, their hair, their barking and messes. I just don't care for them.
HOWEVER, after our dc home got broken into, my husband wanted to get a dog for safety of our family AND the dc families, so I let him do it.

I told the parents what had happened (not that they couldn't tell from the hole cut in the window) and what my husband said. No dc parent had a problem, but did warn me how pit bulls are a little more dangerous because of their jaws and how they lock up when they get hold of something, a trait other dogs don't have. I never really saw a pit that I knew was a pit so I looked them up. Was not interested in any pit bull based on the fact that they are some sort of terrier dogs and terrier dogs do not like to be alone and are loud barkers.

So, after a few days, still no dog, my husband finds the dog of his dreams, a Siberian Husky puppy. By nature Siberians are friendly with everyone. So we went and got her. The dc parents loved her (even though she hated them). The problem? She was extremely protective, and while that seems great, she would get mean toward the parents who came into the house to take "her" babies. She played with the dc kids and was great at first. Then she went to an appt and she was badly injured at the vet BY the vet who screamed and yelled at her because she squealed and moved during her shots. (She was 3 months old). She was NEVER the same. After this incident, she became aggressive with everyone except us. She didn't even want to play with the dc kids anymore.

Lucky for me, I don't do dc anymore. But if I had, I would have had to get rid of her because there was no way that we could risk it.

Dogs change, just like people, and can become very irritable by lots of things. You just don't know what will set them off. She would bite you if you came to my house and tried to touch her. She growls at the doorbell when it rings. She hates people now. All because ONE incident that she seemed never to forget.

I would NOT allow my young babies to be around a dc w/ a dog knowing what I know now. ANY dog. Not just pits.

And, if the dc didn't have pets before, they DO have an obligation to tell their dc parents about them. Many parents (like me) would choose a dc without ANY pets for several reasons: allergies, hair, just overall cleanliness, and last but definitely not least, because animals are not "safe".
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Cradle2crayons 11:03 AM 05-19-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
First, I hate dogs. Just can't stand them, their hair, their barking and messes. I just don't care for them.
HOWEVER, after our dc home got broken into, my husband wanted to get a dog for safety of our family AND the dc families, so I let him do it.

I told the parents what had happened (not that they couldn't tell from the hole cut in the window) and what my husband said. No dc parent had a problem, but did warn me how pit bulls are a little more dangerous because of their jaws and how they lock up when they get hold of something, a trait other dogs don't have. I never really saw a pit that I knew was a pit so I looked them up. Was not interested in any pit bull based on the fact that they are some sort of terrier dogs and terrier dogs do not like to be alone and are loud barkers.

So, after a few days, still no dog, my husband finds the dog of his dreams, a Siberian Husky puppy. By nature Siberians are friendly with everyone. So we went and got her. The dc parents loved her (even though she hated them). The problem? She was extremely protective, and while that seems great, she would get mean toward the parents who came into the house to take "her" babies. She played with the dc kids and was great at first. Then she went to an appt and she was badly injured at the vet BY the vet who screamed and yelled at her because she squealed and moved during her shots. (She was 3 months old). She was NEVER the same. After this incident, she became aggressive with everyone except us. She didn't even want to play with the dc kids anymore.

Lucky for me, I don't do dc anymore. But if I had, I would have had to get rid of her because there was no way that we could risk it.

Dogs change, just like people, and can become very irritable by lots of things. You just don't know what will set them off. She would bite you if you came to my house and tried to touch her. She growls at the doorbell when it rings. She hates people now. All because ONE incident that she seemed never to forget.

I would NOT allow my young babies to be around a dc w/ a dog knowing what I know now. ANY dog. Not just pits.

And, if the dc didn't have pets before, they DO have an obligation to tell their dc parents about them. Many parents (like me) would choose a dc without ANY pets for several reasons: allergies, hair, just overall cleanliness, and last but definitely not least, because animals are not "safe".

I was right there with you until the last few sentences lol.

First of all, my allergist and family ENT told us from day one if we wanted a cat or dog or any other animal that having them in the home from the beginning actually reduces the likelihood a child will develop an allergy to that animal.

I don't know a single parent in 25 years who has ever had a problem with our multitude of pets ranging from all extremes ( not big dogs though). So saying many parents would choose a dc without any pets has not been my experience.

With that said, I would not allow my kids into any home with any animal that has been deemed dangerous or when I went for an interview I got a bad vibe about, regardless of breed.

In regard to cleanliness, my house is the cleanest house I've ever been into and we have multiple pets. So that statement couldn't be more false.

In regard to animals being "NOT SAFE" .. Never has a more uneducated statement been muttered.

Wow..that's all I can say about that.
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Unregistered 02:06 PM 05-19-2013
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
I was right there with you until the last few sentences lol.

First of all, my allergist and family ENT told us from day one if we wanted a cat or dog or any other animal that having them in the home from the beginning actually reduces the likelihood a child will develop an allergy to that animal.

I don't know a single parent in 25 years who has ever had a problem with our multitude of pets ranging from all extremes ( not big dogs though). So saying many parents would choose a dc without any pets has not been my experience.

With that said, I would not allow my kids into any home with any animal that has been deemed dangerous or when I went for an interview I got a bad vibe about, regardless of breed.

In regard to cleanliness, my house is the cleanest house I've ever been into and we have multiple pets. So that statement couldn't be more false.

In regard to animals being "NOT SAFE" .. Never has a more uneducated statement been muttered.

Wow..that's all I can say about that.
Animals AREN'T "Safe" I put that in quotes because there is no such thing as a 100% safe animal. So call me uneducated, but I have seen even family dogs turn on their owners for one reason or other. Example: One of my friends had the friendliest dog ever. Never hurt a flea. Dog got ill (hey not his fault, but still), and he didn't want to be bothered. One day, probably because of the illness and being uppity, he bit my friend's daughter in the face. Whether or not it was accidental or out of fright or whatever does not matter.My friend's daughter needed 18 stitches and she has a permanent scar. So you see, though everyone who was around that dog thought he was "safe", they were proven wrong and oddly shocked that an animal could "do" such a thing. My friend even said "Well he never did that stuff before!" Of course not! He wasn't sick before either! But there's a first time for everything, and my point is you just don't know when or if or why something can happen. So my statement wasn't uneducated. I've seen and heard first-hand what can happen. Until you have been faced with a situation where your normally docile animal has acted out/attacked/bitten, you will never see that it IS possible and that there is no such thing as a completely safe animal. (Not just dogs, but ANY animal).

Additionally, as far as allergies: Everyone has different allergies; different reactions to things. Your ENT gave you info based on what he knows about YOU and yours, his patients. He cannot possibly give you information about someone he has never even seen and studies can only carry a person so far (and btw we've had animals since our babies were very little, and they are still very allergic to them and have to take prescription medications in order for us to even keep the dog and cat we have, so your ENT would be wrong about 3 out of 4 of my children; once these animals pass, there will be no more animals in our home), so therefore, while his advice worked for you, it doesn't mean that's a "one size fits all" deal, as it may not have been the same advice he would give to another patient.

The issues I listed don't apply to every single parent, nor did I say or imply that it was. I said "Many" parents choose pet-free day cares, which is most definitely true. The ones who may not have chosen you may have had that reason for not choosing you and you don't even know it.

The point isn't what worked for your situation or for mine, though, it's what was the right thing to do was. Just because a person "doesn't have to" or has the "right" to do something doesn't mean they SHOULDN'T have some courtesy and respect for others, especially when they are running a business. The right and just thing to do would have been to tell the families they wanted a dog, asked about allergies and asked if the parents would feel comfortable with it or not. (Now that said: she ALSO has the right to tell the parents she was getting the dog and if anyone was NOT comfortable with it, they would need other care; either way a heads up is the right thing to do).
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Leigh 02:25 PM 05-19-2013
"pit bulls are a little more dangerous because of their jaws and how they lock up when they get hold of something, a trait other dogs don't have"

REALLY???? That is SOOOOO not true. Don't believe everything you hear, honey. Hahaha. However would they "lock" their jaws?


AS far as dogs and kids go: DON'T. I have kept between 2 & 4 dogs throughout my life. I would NEVER leave one of them alone with my OWN child, let alone someone else's. The dogs are separated during daycare hours, period. This is the ONLY way to ensure safety of the children I care for. I have what would be considered "kid-safe" breeds-and they DO love kids. They just would never be around one unless I was ACTIVELY supervising their interactions. Pit bull type and daycare should not be an issue. NO dog should be alone with kids.
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Cradle2crayons 02:34 PM 05-19-2013
Originally Posted by Leigh:
"pit bulls are a little more dangerous because of their jaws and how they lock up when they get hold of something, a trait other dogs don't have"

REALLY???? That is SOOOOO not true. Don't believe everything you hear, honey. Hahaha. However would they "lock" their jaws?


AS far as dogs and kids go: DON'T. I have kept between 2 & 4 dogs throughout my life. I would NEVER leave one of them alone with my OWN child, let alone someone else's. The dogs are separated during daycare hours, period. This is the ONLY way to ensure safety of the children I care for. I have what would be considered "kid-safe" breeds-and they DO love kids. They just would never be around one unless I was ACTIVELY supervising their interactions. Pit bull type and daycare should not be an issue. NO dog should be alone with kids.

Lol Leigh... It's amazing how some people think they know all these facts.... As a responsible pet owner, if I had a sick dog, I wouldn't have kids around it anyway. And as a responsible parent I wouldn't allow my kids around a sick animal because any sick animal can act different than they would normally act.

A lot of kids getting bit can be PREVENTED. with just some COMMON SENSE.

Not ALL mind you...

And unregistered user.... My ENT and doctors were right..l and I do have first hand,,,, I've been a pediatric nurse since 1997. Been there, seen and treated many an animal bitten children. Miraculously though none were victims of those LOCKED JAWS. Lol

But seriously, I don't blame the OP for being upset. And unregistered user, I've NEVER had a parent NOT choose me in 25 years. However, I've NOT CHOSEN a lot of parents lol.

And btw... My ENT of 25 years gave me information based on decades of research available to anyone wanting to read it.
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Unregistered 08:15 AM 05-21-2013
You guys think your opinions are 100% right, as evidenced by your followup posts. But what someone else experienced is just them being uneducated. Mmmmkay. Not going to argue with you girls, because whether or not something works for you doesn't mean it works for everyone. And NO 2 patients are alike, being a former "nurse" you should know that. But carry on
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Cradle2crayons 12:14 PM 05-21-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
You guys think your opinions are 100% right, as evidenced by your followup posts. But what someone else experienced is just them being uneducated. Mmmmkay. Not going to argue with you girls, because whether or not something works for you doesn't mean it works for everyone. And NO 2 patients are alike, being a former "nurse" you should know that. But carry on
Change former to CURRENT in that one sentence please ma'am ...

When it comes to pets it's not about what "works" for me. It's about what I need to protect both my animals and my children.

Your right, when I say COMMON SENSE.... I should be more clear... Because a lot of people lack those two words.
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SSWonders 09:06 PM 09-14-2013
Has there been an update to this situation?
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Blackcat31 07:18 AM 09-15-2013
Originally Posted by SSWonders:
Has there been an update to this situation?
This thread is 3 years old, I doubt OP has returned. Several posters in this thread are no longer posting here either so I doubt there will ever be an update.
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Michael 12:55 PM 09-15-2013
I sent and email to the OP. Let's hope her email still works and we get an update.
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KidGrind 05:42 PM 09-15-2013
**bursts out laughing**
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SSWonders 05:49 AM 09-16-2013
Originally Posted by KidGrind:
**bursts out laughing**
I'm not getting the joke.....
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Tags:dog breed restrictions, dogs, pit bull
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