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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>First Rejected Family
Unregistered 08:21 PM 06-08-2020
I am just starting my in-home (planned before covid 19) and immediately enrolled a seemingly great family through Craigslist. We did a Zoom call and got paperwork and payment pretty fast.

Then a few days later, another. Nightmare from the start. The person wanted 3 days plus an every other 4th. I won't offer that every other usually but since I am starting out and need clients and the child was the age of my daughter and enrolled kid, I offered to cut the price a bit to hold the space, and charge that price monthly like I normally would, and then charge the difference weekly if he wants care on the every other day.
It was clear:
$30 each day for the 3 days, $20 for the 4th, charged monthly, and each week if they say they are coming, I would charge. Payment would need to be made regardless of actual attendance prior to that day. He agreed. The text was a bit weird and his sentence were not the most full or coherent.

I requested mu interest form be filled twice during this process. Never received.

I scheduled a zoom meet and he agreed.
Missed the meeting, no apology when I texted asking to reschedule. I should not have given the next chance but I am professional and did.
And meeting, missed. I asked if this person wanted to shoot off questions and I record an answer to make it more personable. No response.

Got another email asking when to start planning for daycare. Ok, my county opened for phase two this weekend so I offered (yes a 3rd chance) an in person visit. I offered two times. Finally, yesterday, got a "are you available at 345?" As if I did not ask initially.
Guy shows up 15 minutes late. No apology. Actually I assumed from the name it was a woman, and this guy came alone. Just me and my daughter...not a safe situation if you ask me. Luckily no safety issues.
But he was weird from the start and very off pitting. Got mildly aggressive at things like ensuring kids cover their cough (yet he wore no mask. Made a big deal at my offer to shake his hand. Uhhh...I have a sink to wash my hands after.) And talked about his ex making up stories on child abuse and things. Wanted me to take pictures of her injuries should she show. When I said I would not be embarrasing a child with pictures, he interjected aggressively "I would!" Ok, dude.

He did not seem to care for my offerings, brushed off my mention of experience, and then was confused at the pricing. He said I was not being simple enough for him. Made me calculate the entire summer for him-which he could do himself.
When I told him my registration fee of $50-admin and such- he was floored. $50 is standard here. I provide my policies online but I have everything in printed form in a folder. I explained it pays for admin-writing my policies, getting packet materials, ink, paper, and filing. It is also my time for meeting with people. He asked lots of questions and I could tell he was not agreeing. He then said he wanted to pay twice a month to which I said no.
Said he would talk with his wife tonight, and walked out back turned so didnt look st me saying goodbye.


Thus began my standard rejection letter. I put in there I look at the start of contact through signed contract and people I feel respect my time and policies can have a space. I said I would not elaborate specifics.
He emailed and told me I was overcharging for what I offered.
I responded with being kind to providers and suggesting he research what providers make. I formed him I provide a professional service and based off my experience (a center Director previously) those are my rates. I ended with me not being a babysitter.

It was worded really well and professionally. I know I will get a lot of people like that.

Sucks though, I really want to enroll. This is horrible timing with covid AND my daughter-who has 1 friend so I dont have any contacts-is going to a new school next year with a boundary change.

He leaves without event
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Unregistered 08:22 PM 06-08-2020
Sorry for spelling errors and the last sentence. I hit submit before proofing
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Josiegirl 02:40 AM 06-09-2020
Be patient; good and respectful dcfs will come. You don't have the time or sanity to put up with people's bs like that. Can you imagine, if you're seeing red flags like that right from the beginning, what it could become?? No thank you.

Good luck!!
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DaveA 03:57 AM 06-09-2020
Yeah- all that that quickly means there’s no way I would enroll. Like Josiegirl said- you’ll find good families.
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284878 06:15 AM 06-09-2020
Having an interview via Zoom, I need to do that.

Second your payment of weekly and monthly sounds confusing. I had a family that asked to make alternate payment schedule to my weekly schedule. I said I didn't care as long as they were always paid ahead.

For me, if a family wants 4 days sometimes but three all the time, this is what I do. I write the contract both ways, for three and four days and let them know if they want to make sure the fourth day is always available, they must pay for it.
On the three day contract I write 3 days will cost xx and paid weekly. Each add on day will be an additional xx paid within 24 hours after approved with no refunds and are not always garunteed. Switching days are not allowed. Request for an add on day must be in writing.
Basically I treat add on days like drop in and charge accordingly. Since I prefer add on over drop in, add on takes priority.
Anyways, this way doesn't lock me into a contract and I can fill the day with another child or they can buy the day weekly and switch to a four day contract.

Also I start doing this and ended up with Fridays off, aka closed Fridays and only being opened when I want to on Friday. Yes if they are not following my rules, I will and have refused their request.
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Snowmom 04:00 PM 06-09-2020
I'm sorry, that sounds frustrating.

If I may give a little advice: next time, stick with your gut. You knew it didn't feel right. Don't try to force it. Actually, even giving "benefit of the doubt" will likely come back to bite you.
No show= no spot.

If you ever feel like denying a family. It doesn't help to tell them why. They only get defensive or vindictive.
Just let it go and if they contact you regarding the spot, just say "I don't believe we are a good fit for one another. It was nice meeting you and your family and I'm happy to refer you to a couple daycare resources (and include them)." and leave it at that.

I hope you fill quickly! It's a crazy time out there. But with restrictions being lifted, calls will come!
Good luck!
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Unregistered 12:00 AM 06-10-2020
Originally Posted by 284878:
Having an interview via Zoom, I need to do that.

Second your payment of weekly and monthly sounds confusing. I had a family that asked to make alternate payment schedule to my weekly schedule. I said I didn't care as long as they were always paid ahead.

For me, if a family wants 4 days sometimes but three all the time, this is what I do. I write the contract both ways, for three and four days and let them know if they want to make sure the fourth day is always available, they must pay for it.
On the three day contract I write 3 days will cost xx and paid weekly. Each add on day will be an additional xx paid within 24 hours after approved with no refunds and are not always garunteed. Switching days are not allowed. Request for an add on day must be in writing.
Basically I treat add on days like drop in and charge accordingly. Since I prefer add on over drop in, add on takes priority.
Anyways, this way doesn't lock me into a contract and I can fill the day with another child or they can buy the day weekly and switch to a four day contract.

Also I start doing this and ended up with Fridays off, aka closed Fridays and only being opened when I want to on Friday. Yes if they are not following my rules, I will and have refused their request.

I think I'll stick with Zoom for initial meets--nobody has to make a drive and know where I live if it isn't a good fit. I'm also going to have a "bring your kid" rule. The guy originally said he would bring her--not reading my ad that stated Zoom meet--and then did not.

When I was a Director I had children on crazy schedules--and especially in a before/after setting, that allowed for "under an hour" and "over an hour" I knew it all like the back of my hand--all the rates per session, and I had kids with very odd schedules.
Simplest odd schedule: M, T, Th PM for two children.
Some would be like: M, T AM, W PM, E/O Th AM and maybe PM.
And one family had three kid, all of whom had different schedules like
Kid A: M AM under an hour, T PM over an hour, and so on.
Kid B: Completely Different
Kid C: Completely different
*2 weeks later mom switches it, after not abiding by schedule. I would be able to say "OK, You scheduled Tuesday as such, but you did not attend, but you attended Friday that you're not scheduled for at the same rate as Tuesday, except that one session you attended over an hour instead of under, so what I'll do is only charge that over an hour difference."

Confusing, huh? LOL, I am a pro at funky schedules!

I just don't WANT to do them anymore. Parents got really crazy and don't get it is a space situation. So I am charging per month, due on the 1st. Parents are provided a daily rate because there is no set month rate since they don't have to be full time.

But, since I don't have a wait list, and I knew it was summer-only, I wanted to be flexible. Would this be less confusing:

*Parent wants M-W each week, and some Thursdays.*
July tuition ([3 days a week, $30/day x 13 days] + [1 day 'holding space' $20 x 5 days]) = $X <--put that invoice out at the end of June, payments due the 1st. (Alternatively, I could put the 3 days a week part as $X, the holding space part as $Y, and add them together as what is due.

*Parent sends schedule on July 3rd for following week, saying they will attend on July 9th.*

I sent an invoice for $10 (the difference between the $30 rate and the pre-paid holding rate of $20) and it must be paid prior to attendance, regardless of cancellation.


*Following week, parent does not need care; no new invoice*


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Unregistered 12:02 AM 06-10-2020
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
I'm sorry, that sounds frustrating.

If I may give a little advice: next time, stick with your gut. You knew it didn't feel right. Don't try to force it. Actually, even giving "benefit of the doubt" will likely come back to bite you.
No show= no spot.

If you ever feel like denying a family. It doesn't help to tell them why. They only get defensive or vindictive.
Just let it go and if they contact you regarding the spot, just say "I don't believe we are a good fit for one another. It was nice meeting you and your family and I'm happy to refer you to a couple daycare resources (and include them)." and leave it at that.

I hope you fill quickly! It's a crazy time out there. But with restrictions being lifted, calls will come!
Good luck!
This is my rejection letter:

Dear so and so,
It was good meeting you today. I appreciate you taking time to visit my home.
This letter is generic for any family this is sent to and it is to tell you I will not be moving forward with enrollment.
As a personal provider, I have the ability to be selective of who enters my home. From the start of contact through contract time I evaluate families to see if they are a good fit. There are many reasons why I would not select a family, including but not limited to respect of my time and respect of my policies. I do not elaborate further on my reasons. Best of luck in your journey to find childcare.



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Josiegirl 03:35 AM 06-10-2020
Your letter sounds very professional and well-worded. As do your time explanations in your above post. BUT I am simple and need/do simple. It helps maintain simplicity. Especially with those who will argue their place for what they want. When I was working in my in-home dc, I ended up doing FT rates only. I put it onto my insurance company which was true; they allowed me 6 slots so I had to keep those 6 slots enrolled(or at least paid for). If I ever needed to dis-enroll or refuse interviewees, I kept it simple to 'it's not a good fit'.

Personally, I felt dealing with PT was confusing and interrupted any semblance of routine that I wanted to achieve. Plus it seemed like there was always a hassle of amount of money. So I kept it.....simple.

Do NOT sell yourself short if you do deal with PT. Make it pay. And average families have enough on their plate so make it very simple to understand. *You* may have experience with funky schedules but hard-working average families don't want to have to figure it out.

JMO
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Blackcat31 07:39 AM 06-10-2020
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
This is my rejection letter:

Dear so and so,
It was good meeting you today. I appreciate you taking time to visit my home.
This letter is generic for any family this is sent to and it is to tell you I will not be moving forward with enrollment.
As a personal provider, I have the ability to be selective of who enters my home. From the start of contact through contract time I evaluate families to see if they are a good fit. There are many reasons why I would not select a family, including but not limited to respect of my time and respect of my policies. I do not elaborate further on my reasons. Best of luck in your journey to find childcare.



I have the opposite opinion. I think it's too much

I would say something super generic such as:

Dear Family,

Thank you for your interest in ABC Child Care and for taking the time to meet.

Unfortunately, at this time I will not be offering your family the available space.
If things should change in the future I will let you know.

Should you need additional assistance in your search for care services, please visit the website below.
Thank you again for your interest in ABC Child Care.

Sincerely,

Owner/Operator ABC Child Care

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AmyKidsCo 01:08 PM 06-10-2020
Random thoughts as I read along...

1. Don't enroll a family because you're afraid to have an opening. After 25+ years in the business I've finally learned that the right family will come along, and it's worth it to wait for them.

2. 4 days it FT for me, but I had a similar situation with 2/3 days. DCG usually came 2 days but occasionally 3 days. The first week she came 2 days but they paid for 3, then they paid for 2 days every week. When she came for a 3rd day they brought payment when they dropped her off. That day was already paid for (the first week) so the payment was for the NEXT 3rd day. I hope that makes sense!

3. Letter: Dear (family),
Thank you for your interest in my program, I enjoyed meeting (child) and chatting with you

Unfortunately, at this time I don't think my program is a good fit for your family.

I wish you good luck in your child care search. If you need help finding child care, (local agency) may be able to help. (phone, website)

Sincerely,
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Tags:enforcing policies - consistency, interview - fail, red flag, rejection letter
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