We just started a family with a 9 yo sister, a 6 yo brother and a 3 yo sister. We had them before, but the 3 yo was just walking then...

I had the 6yo when he was 3....he whined A LOT and never got fully potty trained. His sister is similar, but she SCREAMS.

When she can't get her way. Real, hysterical crying for 30+ minutes. . I only have her in the afternoon because she goes to headstart, so her routine usually starts at teh tail end of nap.

I talked to mom about it today, and she just basically gave a ton of excuses about the children not being used to the environment, them having been in a lot of daycares....she basically told me I had to deal with it and I was lucky the girl wasn't wetting herself.

The girl never seemed scared of me or the environment, she fell right in the kids, she's never unwilling to come in the afternoon, its just when she can't have her way, or something she doesn't like happens....kablooey.

I don't try to deal with meltdowns...but this daily screaming session right at the last leg of the day is starting to wear on my nerves. And the other children's, because they aren't used to that type of behavior....I haven't had a screamer in a looong time.

I just move her as far away from the other kids, but in my eyesight as I can...and let her wear herself out, but that really isn't working. She's inconsolable for the first 30 minutes, so that doesn't work either. 3-4pm is a very hectic time...kids waking up, kids coming in, kids going out, staff coming in, snack, homework....

What can I do?

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Is there a seperate room you can put her in in a PNP with a video monitor or baby monitor to hear her? I don't know what your regulations are, but in my state I have to be able to hear them or see them. So with my screamer, when he is at it and I can see there is no consoling him, I put him in his pnp until he calms down. I go in and talk to him every few minutes, and if he calms himself, he can rejoin the group. If not, he stays in there. And I continue the cycle. It is time consuming but if you are going to have a screamer in your group, you will have to find a way to deal with it.

Another method you could use is the Common Sense Parenting techniques. Get down to her level, tell her she is screaming and it is not ok. Validate the reasons why she is upset (if you know) like this, "Sally, you are mad because Lilly is playing with the baby doll. You are mad. Are you mad?" Sometimes validating their feelings makes them stop freaking out because you DO understand. It doesn't always work, but sometimes it does.

Good luck! I feel for you!

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sounds like that may be why they have been to so many daycares.....yikes!

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Does she get a nap at all during the day? Could she be overtired?

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