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hgonzalez 07:21 AM 06-04-2016
I have a 4 yr old boy in my care that constantly does negative things for attention. It starts from the moment he is dropped off. He interrupts any conversation between me and his Mom, never has been given enough hugs, runs up and down the stairs and then screams when she leaves (wants one more hug!). Mom does little to address it even when the child is punching her because 'he wants to talk'.
Fortunately, they are leaving my care, but I have 7 more days to deal with this. It goes on all day long. If I take another child to the bathroom, he does something unacceptable (throwing, pounding on a wall etc.). Every time I speak to another child, he interrupts and starts talking about himself, trying to dominate the conversation. I have tried 1) giving him more positive praise when I see him doing something nice (it is never enough) 2) separating him from the other kids briefly (he kicks and screams) and 3) ignoring him (he kicks, screams, throws things).
He is always getting in the other kids' faces, trying to get them in trouble. He has grabbed things out of my hands and our Music teachers hands and incites arguments with the other kids.
Yesterday was soooo bad. He would not stay on his cot at naptime. I had him eat his snack after the other kids (to avoid the chaos), and he actually accused me of putting something in his water (honey?) and then stood up on his chair when he didn't get a reaction. I have all younger kids here until next week and they are starting to mimic his behavior.
I have 7 more days of care for him. I need suggestions on getting through the next 7 days without having to constantly address his behaviors. I don't like the idea on continually separating him from the other kids, but may have to do some of that. If anyone has any insight on WHY he might be doing this, I would appreciate it.
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Thriftylady 07:55 AM 06-04-2016
He is doing it because it gets him what he wants at home. You only have two choices, deal with it for the next week, or term now if it is really to much. Is this new behavior or has it been like this for a long time?
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hgonzalez 08:23 AM 06-04-2016
The behavior has always been present, but has gotten much worse in the past 2 months. It is almost to the point of being unmanageable.

I have tried to gently address the 'punching' of his Mom at drop off, but she doesn't reinforce what I am saying. I have said 'In my house, we don't hurt each other'. He keeps punching and she keeps tolerating it.

I have another child that will occassionally hit Mom at pick up and she stops it right away.
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Blackcat31 08:30 AM 06-04-2016
Originally Posted by hgonzalez:
The behavior has always been present, but has gotten much worse in the past 2 months. It is almost to the point of being unmanageable.

I have tried to gently address the 'punching' of his Mom at drop off, but she doesn't reinforce what I am saying. I have said 'In my house, we don't hurt each other'. He keeps punching and she keeps tolerating it.

I have another child that will occassionally hit Mom at pick up and she stops it right away.
Any parent that allowed their child to physically assault them would be termed immediately.

The impact of that behavior is unacceptable.

7 days left? You have two choices... suck it up and deal or term now. NOTHING is going to change in 7 days.
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hgonzalez 10:20 AM 06-07-2016
5.5 more days.....arghhhh
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:59 AM 06-07-2016
I would tell Mom his bad behavior is rubbing off onto other children so she will need to do the drop offs and pick ups outside. Ring the bell when she's ready for you to take him by hand inside and text you before she arrives so you can hand her his hand right over the threshold. I wouldn't allow him to remain in my house punching his Mom or being so rude. Plus, if she's miffed about it does it really matter? It's 5 days of her feeling some kind of way.

I'd separate this child. Sorry but not sorry.
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LindseyA 03:28 PM 06-07-2016
I might even go as far as calling for pick up, for bad behavior. Even if it's everyday for the next 5 days! To inconvenience mom might shed some light and make her realize her son's behavior is unacceptable. Especially if it influencing the younger children. Hang in there!!
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Josiegirl 02:23 AM 06-08-2016
Five days left? Definitely keep him separated with his own play space and make sure he knows why.
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hgonzalez 04:48 AM 06-08-2016
Thanks everyone, I am tearing my hair out with this kid. He just tries to irritate everyone all day long. Then he drew a picture of his 'friends' a couple of days ago. They were stick figures and after I complemented him on the drawing, he took a red crayon and drew penises on all of them.
I didn't let the others see it.
5 more days, 5 more days, 5 more days.
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Tags:4 year old, attention seeking
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