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tenderhearts 08:08 AM 04-27-2018
I have a 4 yr old dcb who has been with me just about a year. He's a super well behaved kid meaning, he is nice to everyone, is helpful, and he's sweet. HOWEVER, he is extremely obnoxious, rarely is he not, he's not loud but obnoxious. He is someone you would label "class clown" he wants and tries to make everyone laugh and when he gets that reaction it just escalates.
It starts the second he comes in my door. He starts making weird noises, screetching baby type noices (hard to explain), he starts jokingly hitting things or himself, not hard or anything just in an obnoxious way, playing he will just do annoying things like, build something and knock it down and everyone thinks is so funny, just movements, it's super hard to explain. But one of my other dcb who was always super good, he still is but he thinks this boy is the funniest thing ever and has now started picking up doing these things, not to this extent but when he sees the other boy it starts. I have talked to them until I"m blue in the face about this. The boy is 4 1/2 and I've explained to him there are times to be like this and times not to be, we can't even sing in circle time with out him singing obnoxiously or goofing around in some manner which then makes the others start laughing and acting out.
I started immediately putting them in the other room an additional playroom in my dc area and having him sit in there because I don't know what else to do, this has been every day this week and he just doesn't seem to be getting it. I like this boy as I said he's sweet and nice to everyone I just don't know what to do anymore, no matter what activity I give him he finds away to be completely obnoxious and frankly it's very annoying and now with the other boy laughing at him just constant it gets even more annoying because then he joins in. I have separated them even. Any ideas?
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Jo123ABC 12:32 PM 04-27-2018
This reminds me of a couple of "rough-housers" who would drive me crazy just touching each other constantly. A boy and girl to make it worse! I finally put my foot down and the one encouraging it was put in time out at the same time as the one initiating it. It just all seemed so inappropriate to me. I spoke with both families who also had "talks" with them at home. I did time out every single time I saw them touch. I made them stay within my sight at all times. The one who encouraged it really hates getting in trouble so he started to avoid the other for a while. They rarely touch now.
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Blackcat31 12:38 PM 04-27-2018
Other than trying to teach him more positive ways of getting attention and making friends, there probably isn't much you can do.

I have a very similar child. He is a 3.75 yrs old and has 4 older siblings that are in their late teens so EVERYTHING is funny at his house...not-so-much here.

I point out positive peer behaviors so he knows what I expect of him and has examples of how to make others want to play with him but if or when it gets out of hand, I will absolutely have him go play by himself.

I just continually remind him that (whatever behavior he is doing) is not okay and is not how we play with our friends. Then I suggest he take some alone time to regroup and try again.

Once he is ready to behave as I expect him to socially he is allowed to try again. If he goes into the screeching animal sounds or any other behavior that is unacceptable, he is again directed to alone time.

Basically I want him to learn that he must behave in proper social ways in order for others to accept him and that if he CHOOSES to have unwanted behaviors it does nothing but buy him alone time. He can be his own audience.

Rinse and repeat. That's all I've got.
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tenderhearts 01:02 PM 04-27-2018
I know this boy likes the attention because he has 2 older brothers and a baby brother, not that he is neglected at home I just think that well having the other siblings I'm sure he feels someone left out at times so acting out here and getting the attention makes him feel good.
I do exactly that, tell him each time and it literally works for 5 min or less before it starts again, it's just so annoying because as I said he has gotten another boy to "join in".
This week I put my foot down and it's immediate separation and if it happens again they go sit alone. It seems to be working today but I"m sure it wont last, we'll be starting over next week.

I"m just so tired of this absorbing my whole entire day. I'm tired of rinsing and repeating, it's that much.
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Tags:4 year old, obnoxious kids
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