Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Potty Training...Sigh
midaycare 12:42 PM 12-07-2016
Almost 4 year old dcb. Finally potty training, according to dcf. Stays dry all night. No accidents at home. Here...he screams and flails when I mention the potty, let alone put him on it. And I have to put him on it. Parents don't understand it. I don't either. Am I being lied to?
Reply
Leigh 02:30 PM 12-07-2016
Originally Posted by midaycare:
Almost 4 year old dcb. Finally potty training, according to dcf. Stays dry all night. No accidents at home. Here...he screams and flails when I mention the potty, let alone put him on it. And I have to put him on it. Parents don't understand it. I don't either. Am I being lied to?
You don't have to put him on it. He doesn't want to use the toilet, and YOU can't make him. Wait til he asks and stop letting it be YOUR problem.
Reply
midaycare 03:08 PM 12-07-2016
I'm just not understanding why parents say he goes for them at home and he acts like I'm trying to murder him when I suggest the potty.
Originally Posted by Leigh:
You don't have to put him on it. He doesn't want to use the toilet, and YOU can't make him. Wait til he asks and stop letting it be YOUR problem.

Reply
Blackcat31 04:37 PM 12-07-2016
Originally Posted by Leigh:
You don't have to put him on it. He doesn't want to use the toilet, and YOU can't make him. Wait til he asks and stop letting it be YOUR problem.


Home is not daycare. Daycare is not home.
Kids choose their battles too
Reply
finsup 04:52 PM 12-07-2016
Mine was potty trained but at his grandparents he refused to go. It made no sense. He would hold it mostly, a few accidents but I mean he would be there ALL day (he goes with them once a week). Neither myself or mil/fil had any idea what the big deal was. One day he just up and decided to do it lol. No issues since.

Point being, kids are weird. Give it some time and tell dcp's pull ups until he stops flipping out
Reply
Leigh 05:28 PM 12-07-2016
Originally Posted by midaycare:
I'm just not understanding why parents say he goes for them at home and he acts like I'm trying to murder him when I suggest the potty.
Because he can. He can have control that way-it's one of the few things he has control over, and for some reason, he needs to resist at your house. You can't change it. I've had kids potty trained at home, and not here, and I've had them the other way around (where they only go here and refuse at home). What I would do is stop changing his diapers. Tell him that you don't change diapers for kids his age and have him do it himself. It's the only thing that's worked for me (and it gives him TOTAL control over whether to use the toilet or not, which is what he seeks).
Reply
midaycare 06:29 PM 12-07-2016
Originally Posted by Leigh:
Because he can. He can have control that way-it's one of the few things he has control over, and for some reason, he needs to resist at your house. You can't change it. I've had kids potty trained at home, and not here, and I've had them the other way around (where they only go here and refuse at home). What I would do is stop changing his diapers. Tell him that you don't change diapers for kids his age and have him do it himself. It's the only thing that's worked for me (and it gives him TOTAL control over whether to use the toilet or not, which is what he seeks).
How do you make sure their butts are wiped properly with wipes? I like this idea but I'm curious how it would play it. He would gladly sit in it all day instead of changing it. He has zero self help skills. He will stand there and cry until I help him with a sock, shoe, pants, hat. My toughest child ever...
Reply
Leigh 07:40 AM 12-08-2016
Originally Posted by midaycare:
How do you make sure their butts are wiped properly with wipes? I like this idea but I'm curious how it would play it. He would gladly sit in it all day instead of changing it. He has zero self help skills. He will stand there and cry until I help him with a sock, shoe, pants, hat. My toughest child ever...
Just check when they're done. Have them remove their pants, remove their own diaper, give a pack of wipes and a trash can (I just remove the bag when they're done). Have them put their own diaper back on, too (check it when they're done). They don't like the work, realize that the toilet is easier, and soon choose the toilet over the diaper.
Reply
daycarediva 09:57 AM 12-08-2016
Originally Posted by Leigh:
Because he can. He can have control that way-it's one of the few things he has control over, and for some reason, he needs to resist at your house. You can't change it. I've had kids potty trained at home, and not here, and I've had them the other way around (where they only go here and refuse at home). What I would do is stop changing his diapers. Tell him that you don't change diapers for kids his age and have him do it himself. It's the only thing that's worked for me (and it gives him TOTAL control over whether to use the toilet or not, which is what he seeks).
This is EXACTLY how I handle it. I do help with poo though, because not a single one of my current kids (potty trained or not) would be able to clean up poo without making the mess 10,000x worse.

Also- I would be INSISTING that parents get those self help skills up to par. I am beyond sick of potty training/ trained kids unable to even pull their pants DOWN.

My oldest enrolled child is 4, she has been potty trained since before her 2nd birthday. Can she pull her clothes down/back up? Nope. Wipe a bm? Nope. I feel like it would be much easier if she were still in diapers.
Reply
Tags:4 year old, potty training
Reply Up