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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Challenged By Child And My Brain
Unregistered 08:17 PM 04-18-2017
Hi, I'm a newish provider, I've been in the field 2 years now, but I only recently got a part time position as the lead educator in a multi-age classroom.
I've found it difficult lately in regards to my job. Since I work at a centre, there are a lot of rules, restrictions and generally difficult things to navigate when it comes to the daily care and engagement of the children, but I'm worried I'm reaching burn out training to navigate them all.
I have some difficult kids, but they're not really all that bad, I can manage them, but there's usually something that happens with a child that requires me to take out the big guns (as in not be miss-sunshine and smiles). I've had some trouble between two girls which wouldn't be so much of a problem if it weren't for the reaction of one of them when I go to discipline her or try to help them work through the problem. She shuts down, puts her hands over her eyes and will spit at me or laugh. I usually just leave her be and tell her she can return when she is ready, which usually leads to a massive melt down or a half-hour long pouting fest, which I really don't mind, its not like I haven't given her every opportunity to avoid it, but I always come home and start to worry on my actions. Maybe I wasn't patient enough, I should have done better, etc. etc.

tldr--I'm tired, frustrated with work environment, overthinking things. How do I not bring daycare worries home with me?

(p.s. I'll be leaving the centre soon to return to school in this field, but I have at least four months left. How do I survive this?)
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Blackcat31 06:03 AM 04-19-2017
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hi, I'm a newish provider, I've been in the field 2 years now, but I only recently got a part time position as the lead educator in a multi-age classroom.
I've found it difficult lately in regards to my job. Since I work at a centre, there are a lot of rules, restrictions and generally difficult things to navigate when it comes to the daily care and engagement of the children, but I'm worried I'm reaching burn out training to navigate them all.
I have some difficult kids, but they're not really all that bad, I can manage them, but there's usually something that happens with a child that requires me to take out the big guns (as in not be miss-sunshine and smiles). I've had some trouble between two girls which wouldn't be so much of a problem if it weren't for the reaction of one of them when I go to discipline her or try to help them work through the problem. She shuts down, puts her hands over her eyes and will spit at me or laugh. I usually just leave her be and tell her she can return when she is ready, which usually leads to a massive melt down or a half-hour long pouting fest, which I really don't mind, its not like I haven't given her every opportunity to avoid it, but I always come home and start to worry on my actions. Maybe I wasn't patient enough, I should have done better, etc. etc.

tldr--I'm tired, frustrated with work environment, overthinking things. How do I not bring daycare worries home with me?

(p.s. I'll be leaving the centre soon to return to school in this field, but I have at least four months left. How do I survive this?)
How old is this child?

What type of protocol do you follow for behaviors like this? Do you provide written info to the parents or just verbal relay? What do her parents say about her behaviors?

~The spitting would send me over the edge and I'd be sending home as that is not only disgusting but it's also dangerous and a huge sanitary issue. It's not something I would tolerate in ANY setting.

What does the center have in place for discipline policies?
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Pestle 06:07 AM 04-19-2017
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
tldr--I'm tired, frustrated with work environment, overthinking things. How do I not bring daycare worries home with me?
I had an extremely stressful job for six years--my desk abutted the desk of a manager with anger issues. It was hard on everyone in our little pod of workstations, and several people quit because of it.

One thing that helped me was having a weekly small group that met in the evening after work. I got to connect with other adults who were more similar to me in life stage than my coworkers, got to let out my fears and anxieties briefly as we recapped our week, and then set all that aside to focus on the discussion topic. Just having that regular ritual and building a family in the group helped a lot to recharge me each week. I also attended church each weekend and that was another boost. If you're not religious, please do find some other social group that meets weekly so that you can build a life outside of work. It may seem like you don't have the time for it, but you must insist on time for self-care each week.

Another thing that helped was bringing a book or knitting project to work so that my lunch breaks were disconnected from work. Without that outside thing to focus on, I'd just wolf down my food while worrying about the job; with the outside thing, I was stepping away from my role at work and taking a tiny little vacation.

At the time, I was taking public transportation, so I also used the commute to detox with a book or project.

If you live with a partner or roommate, are you coming home and then rehashing the day to them? Sometimes venting is not helpful; it can keep you in the stressful work zone even after you've physically left the building.
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Unregistered 06:56 PM 04-19-2017
Thank you for the advice, Blackcat and Pestle. I do have a social group and I am turning a corner on the venting, I came to the conclusion not long ago that it wasn't helping.
In regards to Blackcat, the child is 4.5 years old and if I was in charge, this child would have been sent home a long time ago for all her behaviors, but because we're very ulturistic centre, the manger discourages us from relaying any behavior that could be considered negative. I usually exclude her from the group for a time before reintroducing, that usually mends the behavior for the day, but its a constant repeat daily. She been a tough child in every room she's been in. She'll be in for a big surprise when she gets to the school next year.
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Tags:4 year old, bad behavior
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