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Unregistered 06:41 AM 09-01-2020
How do you handle it when a parent ask if anything has happened at daycare because her kid says they don’t want to come?

Nothing has happened and the only change is the child’s best friend left for school a week ago.

What kid doesn’t want to stay home? Should I have said I’m glad your kid would rather be spending time with you?

It just bothers me the way she asked has anything happened here.

What are ways to handle this if it comes up again?
Thank You!
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Cat Herder 06:51 AM 09-01-2020
It is as common as the teething excuse.

"Not a thing, our routine is the same each and every day. Has anything changed in your bedtime or morning routine? Maybe making a little extra time in the mornings to play together before getting in the car would make it easier for you guys? The older they get, the more uninterrupted time they will want with you. I can help you with some sample schedules and routines if you'd like?"
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Cat Herder 06:53 AM 09-01-2020
The federal study paper said the average parent spends less than 40 minutes per day with their child without a screen, phone, sibling, housework or other disruption. I will have to find the link. If anyone has it handy, please link for me. I am running behind this morning...
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PB&J 04:49 PM 09-01-2020
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
The federal study paper said the average parent spends less than 40 minutes per day with their child without a screen, phone, sibling, housework or other disruption. I will have to find the link. If anyone has it handy, please link for me. I am running behind this morning...
https://www.bls.gov/charts/american-...-by-parent.htm
This is just a chart, but the playing and reading times are WELL under an hour.
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Josiegirl 03:02 AM 09-02-2020
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
It is as common as the teething excuse.

"Not a thing, our routine is the same each and every day. Has anything changed in your bedtime or morning routine? Maybe making a little extra time in the mornings to play together before getting in the car would make it easier for you guys? The older they get, the more uninterrupted time they will want with you. I can help you with some sample schedules and routines if you'd like?"
Good answer Put it back on them. It's very normal for a child to not want to run off to dc every day. Do adults always want to show up at work?? Kids, just like adults, need to learn sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do. And parents are going to continue to always look for a reason so they can try to make things better for their child. It gets challenging(not to mention irritating!)when parents play into things like this way too much. AND a child is constantly changing, their brains are constantly developing; things that were going so smoothly before turn on a dime, lots of times without any reason.
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Cat Herder 06:40 AM 09-02-2020
Originally Posted by PB&J:
https://www.bls.gov/charts/american-...-by-parent.htm
This is just a chart, but the playing and reading times are WELL under an hour.
Thank you! I was struggling with the search terms. Google has been awful lately with results. I don't get it.
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Ariana 06:12 PM 09-02-2020
I always say “yeah my house has tons of rules and no tv so of course they want to stay home”! Seems to work for me.

In your case I would just say she is adjusting to being without her bestie, she needs some TLC but she will get over it and find a new friends to play with. Just play up on what actually changed to get mom off the whole “what happened at daycare” train of thought.
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Sunshine69 11:42 AM 09-03-2020
Same here. I tell the parents it’s common, especially if dcc has spent time in time out recently due to misbehavior. The conversation usually ends right there.

I had one parent ask if my cat scratched her child. Nope, cat doesn’t have claws. Crickets.
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Snowmom 04:19 PM 09-03-2020
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
Do adults always want to show up at work?? Kids, just like adults, need to learn sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do.
I was going to say this too.

Sometimes I get snarky and say "Did something happen at home because sometimes they don't want to leave me."
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Josiegirl 03:57 AM 09-04-2020
Originally Posted by Sunshine69:
Same here. I tell the parents it’s common, especially if dcc has spent time in time out recently due to misbehavior. The conversation usually ends right there.

I had one parent ask if my cat scratched her child. Nope, cat doesn’t have claws. Crickets.
Love it!!
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AmyKidsCo 01:39 PM 09-10-2020
I usually say something about "I know, home is always best" and mention that transitions are hard for children so they probably won't want to go home at pick up.

Except if there's a behavioral issue I want the parents to know about I'll mention that we've been working on __________ really hard this week so that's probably why the child doesn't want to come.
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Tags:bonding, one on one time, parent - its a verb, parents - accusing, time in care, time with parent
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