Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Child Care For Ages 2-5; What To Do With Newborn Sibling
Unregistered 07:56 PM 09-11-2012
I'm a registered user, but logged out for privacy. I'm sure this has been asked before, but it is for those of you who only provide care for children aged 2-5. I was wondering what you do in the case where one of the parents of these children become pregnant and want their newborn to also attend? I love the fact that they trust and like me enough to care for their newborn, but I feel like my child care is not fit for a baby.
First of all, there is nothing for a baby in my playroom. Everything is broken up in centers and the free space left is used for large motor activities. I'm sure I could re-design the playroom, but it would be at the expense of the older children.
Secondly, we do a lot of activities that would be difficult to accomplish with a baby. For example, we live in a hot climate and do lots of water activities outside during the summer (which lasts about 5 months). Due to the high heat, I would not feel comfortable taking the baby outside for any length of time, but I would feel uncomfortable with having a newborn inside napping all alone. I wouldn't be able to go back and forth because I would not leave the older children alone in a wading pool. There are many other things we do that would also become incredibly difficult with a baby.
Lastly, I don't know if this baby will be colicky. My younger dd was colicky and there were many times that I just had to let her cry so I could provide quality care to my older dd and other children. However, it's one thing with my child and it's another thing with someone's other child. I wouldn't want to allow another person's child to cry while I do other things.
I guess my main concern is that I don't want to take away anything from what I already provide to my current families. One new child should not require so much care that all other children do not get the same level of care that they currently receive. I'm also worried about becoming over-burdened and stressed.
The family is wonderful and their older child is super easy and sweet. The new baby is not due until late spring, which means the baby would start mid-summer. My mom said that I'm worrying way too much and wait to see what the circumstances are at the time. For example, if I had a lot of vacancies, I may be forced to provide care for this child. I currently have a waiting list of 2+ children, but probably won't have a vacancy until next August (a child will be starting kindergarten). What would you all do in these circumstances?
First of all, there is nothing for a baby in my playroom. Everything is broken up in centers and the free space left is used for large motor activities. I'm sure I could re-design the playroom, but it would be at the expense of the older children.
Secondly, we do a lot of activities that would be difficult to accomplish with a baby. For example, we live in a hot climate and do lots of water activities outside during the summer (which lasts about 5 months). Due to the high heat, I would not feel comfortable taking the baby outside for any length of time, but I would feel uncomfortable with having a newborn inside napping all alone. I wouldn't be able to go back and forth because I would not leave the older children alone in a wading pool. There are many other things we do that would also become incredibly difficult with a baby.
Lastly, I don't know if this baby will be colicky. My younger dd was colicky and there were many times that I just had to let her cry so I could provide quality care to my older dd and other children. However, it's one thing with my child and it's another thing with someone's other child. I wouldn't want to allow another person's child to cry while I do other things.
I guess my main concern is that I don't want to take away anything from what I already provide to my current families. One new child should not require so much care that all other children do not get the same level of care that they currently receive. I'm also worried about becoming over-burdened and stressed.
The family is wonderful and their older child is super easy and sweet. The new baby is not due until late spring, which means the baby would start mid-summer. My mom said that I'm worrying way too much and wait to see what the circumstances are at the time. For example, if I had a lot of vacancies, I may be forced to provide care for this child. I currently have a waiting list of 2+ children, but probably won't have a vacancy until next August (a child will be starting kindergarten). What would you all do in these circumstances?
daycare 08:04 PM 09-11-2012
I have ages 2-5. I will take actually 20month, but only if they can feed themselves and are able to follow simple directions.
I have several families with kids here with me and then have their younger child else where. It would work the same way if they were in a preschool. I teach preschool, so there is NO way I could or would ever let anything affect my program.
In the past, I had a family with two kids here and a third on the way. I told them i am really sorry that I could not take the baby. That it would be physically impossible for me to continue my program and meet the needs of the group. They got mad and left, but I didn't mind. They knew that when they started their other two kids with me 2 years prior.
I have several families with kids here with me and then have their younger child else where. It would work the same way if they were in a preschool. I teach preschool, so there is NO way I could or would ever let anything affect my program.
In the past, I had a family with two kids here and a third on the way. I told them i am really sorry that I could not take the baby. That it would be physically impossible for me to continue my program and meet the needs of the group. They got mad and left, but I didn't mind. They knew that when they started their other two kids with me 2 years prior.
cheerfuldom 08:06 PM 09-11-2012
Can you get a baby monitor, even a video monitor in order to "watch" the baby while still being able to get outside with the other kids? Can you agree to take the baby on a trial basis only (maybe try it for a few weeks and then decide)? an infant wouldnt need much space at all and considering you would only have the one, it really shouldnt be too much trouble to dedicate one small corner for the baby. yes, eventually they will be mobile but that would be way down the road for now and again, you can re-evaluate what is and is not working at that point. I understand your worry about a colicky baby and that would be why the trial period is set up. I have had infants that were just a dream and others that were screamers from day one.
daycare 08:13 PM 09-11-2012
I tired this too and it only lasted until baby was about 6 months old and just woke up to the world...I had to let the sibling set go. The baby lasted about 4 months with me before it became too much....however, this family understood and was grateful that I was very honest from the start... I only had the baby 2 days a week for a few hours..
the only reason that I said no, was because if I took a baby from one family then what do I tell the next family????
the only reason that I said no, was because if I took a baby from one family then what do I tell the next family????
itlw8 08:57 PM 09-11-2012
I take infants but most in my area do not. One takes them at 12 months and another at 2 years. What happens? they place their infants somewhere else and move them to your program at age 2. What they like at your program would not be the same with a younger group.
Yes it can be done I do it and I think rather well. But why should you you are happy with your program. So dcm needs to look for something for the infant and let you know if the older child will be staying or not.
If the child stays lets her know #2 will be be given preference on the waiting list for when he turns 2
Yes it can be done I do it and I think rather well. But why should you you are happy with your program. So dcm needs to look for something for the infant and let you know if the older child will be staying or not.
If the child stays lets her know #2 will be be given preference on the waiting list for when he turns 2
MaritimeMummy 03:26 AM 09-12-2012
I would at least try it...you never know unless you give it a try!
For me, infant equipment would not be used anyway. To keep my "approved and certified" status, I am not permitted to use jolly jumpers, exersaucers, or jumperoos. I have a Bumbo but honestly for my own daughter, I never used it more than 5 times, and never used it at all with my son. I did use a playmat...BUT...that is something you can get for $5 second-hand and is a great method of stimulating a newborn.
Seriously, newborn babies don't need all these fancy gadgets.
I don't have any newborns in my program NOW, but my son was 3 months old when I started doing home day care. even for a demanding little boy, he wasn't so demanding that he occupied all my time from my 2 year old daughter and my 2 year old DCG. And rather than hold him in my arms to prohibit me from doing things with the toddlers, I wore him in a Maya wrap ring sling. I'm not big on baby carriers and feel really uncomfortable using them, but this is one that is extremely, EXTREMELY user-friendly and fits everyone of every size. http://www.etsy.com/listing/59763248...-newborn-sling I am posting this so you can look at the picture and see just how close and secure the newborn is, while your hands are free. When I wear a newborn though, I don't allow the feet to dangle out like in this picture, but I tuck the legs up inside the carrier, froggie-style, as though the baby were sleeping on his or her belly with the knees drawn up under him/her. I hope that's not too confusing! But I wll tell you, my son was colicky and this was the ONLY thing that calmed him. He came out to play for a bit, to feed, and that was it. He slept on me. He had awake times on me. I took him out when the toddlers were doing something that didn't require hands-on approach. I still got to play with the toddlers, mostly hands-free. I POTTY-TRAINED these two girls while he was in the the ring sling. It was great.
Either way, if you think about it, a newborn really isn't all that much more work. You're not looking at the child being on solids until 6 months or more anyway, so at that point, a feeding seat that straps on to one of your kitchen chairs instead of a full-sized highchair will do just fine. Ask the parents to provide it and send it back with them each night if having infant things around outside of business hours is an issue.
Like I said, it wouldn't hurt to give it a try!
For me, infant equipment would not be used anyway. To keep my "approved and certified" status, I am not permitted to use jolly jumpers, exersaucers, or jumperoos. I have a Bumbo but honestly for my own daughter, I never used it more than 5 times, and never used it at all with my son. I did use a playmat...BUT...that is something you can get for $5 second-hand and is a great method of stimulating a newborn.
Seriously, newborn babies don't need all these fancy gadgets.
I don't have any newborns in my program NOW, but my son was 3 months old when I started doing home day care. even for a demanding little boy, he wasn't so demanding that he occupied all my time from my 2 year old daughter and my 2 year old DCG. And rather than hold him in my arms to prohibit me from doing things with the toddlers, I wore him in a Maya wrap ring sling. I'm not big on baby carriers and feel really uncomfortable using them, but this is one that is extremely, EXTREMELY user-friendly and fits everyone of every size. http://www.etsy.com/listing/59763248...-newborn-sling I am posting this so you can look at the picture and see just how close and secure the newborn is, while your hands are free. When I wear a newborn though, I don't allow the feet to dangle out like in this picture, but I tuck the legs up inside the carrier, froggie-style, as though the baby were sleeping on his or her belly with the knees drawn up under him/her. I hope that's not too confusing! But I wll tell you, my son was colicky and this was the ONLY thing that calmed him. He came out to play for a bit, to feed, and that was it. He slept on me. He had awake times on me. I took him out when the toddlers were doing something that didn't require hands-on approach. I still got to play with the toddlers, mostly hands-free. I POTTY-TRAINED these two girls while he was in the the ring sling. It was great.
Either way, if you think about it, a newborn really isn't all that much more work. You're not looking at the child being on solids until 6 months or more anyway, so at that point, a feeding seat that straps on to one of your kitchen chairs instead of a full-sized highchair will do just fine. Ask the parents to provide it and send it back with them each night if having infant things around outside of business hours is an issue.
Like I said, it wouldn't hurt to give it a try!
snbauser 03:48 AM 09-12-2012
I only take 3-5. I have a friend who also provides child care and she only does infants, toddlers, and twos. She lives about 5 minutes away so it works out well. Right now we actually share 3 families. Maybe you could find another provider nearby that you could team up with?
Sunchimes 05:02 AM 09-12-2012
I had 2 dck that were a month apart in age (18 mo). It was glorious! Then, one of the moms got pregnant and I either had to let the dcg go or take the baby. I took the baby. I won't say I don't like babies, they are cute, sweet, blah blah blah, but they are so boring and they interfere with everything. We use to throw the girls in the car on Saturdays and do the garage sale thing, go to the park, go on walks, go out to lunch. But we don't do that anymore. If dcbaby is outside in the heat for more than a few minutes, he gets red-faced, sweaty, splotchy, and cranky. Everything has to center around him, and worst is that as soon as sweet, lovable dcg sees me giving him a bottle or changing a diaper, she see it as Opportunity.
I have an opening right now and my ad said 18 mo and up, but I haven't had a single call. I am only allowed 3 kids, so basically, a third of my income is gone. I'm going to have to change the ad to remove the age limit, and if a baby is offered, I'll have to take it. I can do it, but with 2 babies, there are things I won't be able to do, and it makes me really sad.
I've been counting the days until dcg was old enough to go out and play hopscotch, color, do circle time and flannel board stories. But, we won't get to do much of that because the emphasis of my business will have to switch from toddler to infants.
I have an opening right now and my ad said 18 mo and up, but I haven't had a single call. I am only allowed 3 kids, so basically, a third of my income is gone. I'm going to have to change the ad to remove the age limit, and if a baby is offered, I'll have to take it. I can do it, but with 2 babies, there are things I won't be able to do, and it makes me really sad.
I've been counting the days until dcg was old enough to go out and play hopscotch, color, do circle time and flannel board stories. But, we won't get to do much of that because the emphasis of my business will have to switch from toddler to infants.
Crazy8 05:18 AM 09-12-2012
I'm the opposite - I take the babies up to about age 3-3 1/2 and then they usually go to preschool. While I thought I'd want to keep them till 4-5 years old I find when I do have them that long they are just too big/too old for what I have to offer. Parents never have a problem splitting them up - kind of comes with the territory of having kids a few years apart.
daycarediva 05:54 AM 09-12-2012
I wouldn't take an infant under any cirsumstances. I did infants when my kids were in the baby stage, but am VERY happy with my prek setup/age group. I also wouldn't take a child that would alter my program and the care I give to the other kids, infant or not.
MyAngels 06:02 AM 09-12-2012
When my own kids were young we had a provider who did not take anyone under 2. When my daughter was born I moved both kids to a provider who took infants since I wanted them together. As long as you're prepared to lose the older child it shouldn't be a problem to accept only older children.
Unregistered 07:50 AM 09-12-2012
Thanks for all of the advice everyone! It seems like everyone is split in half. I would really prefer not to lose older dcg, but I feel like it may be something I have to do because I see no other way around it.
This is the only way it would work:
1) Nap when we are outside. It would be too hot to take a newborn outside.
2) On a blanket on the floor or bouncy when I prepare meals (at 3 times a day for 30 minutes to an hour each time). It would be too dangerous to hold the baby.
3) Either on the floor or being held in a carrier during preschool/arts & crafts activities for 1-1/2 hours.
4) Second nap during everyone else's nap time so I can eat, work on paperwork, do laundry and prepare dinner.
I really can't see a baby molding to this schedule on a daily basis and being happy. Obviously, I am willing to give it a try, but I have a good feeling it will be at everyone's expense (mine, the other children and the baby).
This is the only way it would work:
1) Nap when we are outside. It would be too hot to take a newborn outside.
2) On a blanket on the floor or bouncy when I prepare meals (at 3 times a day for 30 minutes to an hour each time). It would be too dangerous to hold the baby.
3) Either on the floor or being held in a carrier during preschool/arts & crafts activities for 1-1/2 hours.
4) Second nap during everyone else's nap time so I can eat, work on paperwork, do laundry and prepare dinner.
I really can't see a baby molding to this schedule on a daily basis and being happy. Obviously, I am willing to give it a try, but I have a good feeling it will be at everyone's expense (mine, the other children and the baby).
Originally Posted by :
I would at least try it...you never know unless you give it a try!
For me, infant equipment would not be used anyway. To keep my "approved and certified" status, I am not permitted to use jolly jumpers, exersaucers, or jumperoos. I have a Bumbo but honestly for my own daughter, I never used it more than 5 times, and never used it at all with my son. I did use a playmat...BUT...that is something you can get for $5 second-hand and is a great method of stimulating a newborn.
Seriously, newborn babies don't need all these fancy gadgets.
I don't have any newborns in my program NOW, but my son was 3 months old when I started doing home day care. even for a demanding little boy, he wasn't so demanding that he occupied all my time from my 2 year old daughter and my 2 year old DCG. And rather than hold him in my arms to prohibit me from doing things with the toddlers, I wore him in a Maya wrap ring sling. I'm not big on baby carriers and feel really uncomfortable using them, but this is one that is extremely, EXTREMELY user-friendly and fits everyone of every size. http://www.etsy.com/listing/59763248...-newborn-sling I am posting this so you can look at the picture and see just how close and secure the newborn is, while your hands are free. When I wear a newborn though, I don't allow the feet to dangle out like in this picture, but I tuck the legs up inside the carrier, froggie-style, as though the baby were sleeping on his or her belly with the knees drawn up under him/her. I hope that's not too confusing! But I wll tell you, my son was colicky and this was the ONLY thing that calmed him. He came out to play for a bit, to feed, and that was it. He slept on me. He had awake times on me. I took him out when the toddlers were doing something that didn't require hands-on approach. I still got to play with the toddlers, mostly hands-free. I POTTY-TRAINED these two girls while he was in the the ring sling. It was great.
Either way, if you think about it, a newborn really isn't all that much more work. You're not looking at the child being on solids until 6 months or more anyway, so at that point, a feeding seat that straps on to one of your kitchen chairs instead of a full-sized highchair will do just fine. Ask the parents to provide it and send it back with them each night if having infant things around outside of business hours is an issue.
Like I said, it wouldn't hurt to give it a try!
I see what you're saying, and I have tried to wear babies before, but I find that I do a lot of activities that are difficult if not dangerous when holding a baby (like cooking or baking, chopping things with a sharp knife, going outside in 90/100 degree temperatures, running, bending over repeatedly, crouching, etc.). I know baby wearing works with a lot of parents, but it really doesn't work too well with me.I would at least try it...you never know unless you give it a try!
For me, infant equipment would not be used anyway. To keep my "approved and certified" status, I am not permitted to use jolly jumpers, exersaucers, or jumperoos. I have a Bumbo but honestly for my own daughter, I never used it more than 5 times, and never used it at all with my son. I did use a playmat...BUT...that is something you can get for $5 second-hand and is a great method of stimulating a newborn.
Seriously, newborn babies don't need all these fancy gadgets.
I don't have any newborns in my program NOW, but my son was 3 months old when I started doing home day care. even for a demanding little boy, he wasn't so demanding that he occupied all my time from my 2 year old daughter and my 2 year old DCG. And rather than hold him in my arms to prohibit me from doing things with the toddlers, I wore him in a Maya wrap ring sling. I'm not big on baby carriers and feel really uncomfortable using them, but this is one that is extremely, EXTREMELY user-friendly and fits everyone of every size. http://www.etsy.com/listing/59763248...-newborn-sling I am posting this so you can look at the picture and see just how close and secure the newborn is, while your hands are free. When I wear a newborn though, I don't allow the feet to dangle out like in this picture, but I tuck the legs up inside the carrier, froggie-style, as though the baby were sleeping on his or her belly with the knees drawn up under him/her. I hope that's not too confusing! But I wll tell you, my son was colicky and this was the ONLY thing that calmed him. He came out to play for a bit, to feed, and that was it. He slept on me. He had awake times on me. I took him out when the toddlers were doing something that didn't require hands-on approach. I still got to play with the toddlers, mostly hands-free. I POTTY-TRAINED these two girls while he was in the the ring sling. It was great.
Either way, if you think about it, a newborn really isn't all that much more work. You're not looking at the child being on solids until 6 months or more anyway, so at that point, a feeding seat that straps on to one of your kitchen chairs instead of a full-sized highchair will do just fine. Ask the parents to provide it and send it back with them each night if having infant things around outside of business hours is an issue.
Like I said, it wouldn't hurt to give it a try!
3amazingkiddos 11:01 AM 09-12-2012
You have to do what works for you, but I will say its possible. I have two 3 y/o, a 2 y/o, a 1 y/o, and a 3 month old. The 2 smallest ones don't keep us from going outside or activities. If its really hot, we go out early. I plan activities when the baby has a full belly or napping. With a little organization and routine anything is possible. Good luck with your decision!
Nickel 12:37 PM 09-12-2012
If you really don't want to take the infant, then don't feel like you have to. Do what works for you. You can't please everyone. I didn't orginally want infants either, but after not having any children I had to relent. It's not impossible to go outside, however newborns take forever to eat. So there will be times that you will have to tend to the baby and won't be able to do whatever with the older ones. I think if you take the infant when you really don't want to, you may end up resenting him or her. Do what works best for you and your program. Don't feel guilty or bad because you don't accept infants. Not everyone does.
daycare 05:48 PM 09-12-2012
Originally Posted by Nickel:
If you really don't want to take the infant, then don't feel like you have to. Do what works for you. You can't please everyone. I didn't orginally want infants either, but after not having any children I had to relent. It's not impossible to go outside, however newborns take forever to eat. So there will be times that you will have to tend to the baby and won't be able to do whatever with the older ones. I think if you take the infant when you really don't want to, you may end up resenting him or her. Do what works best for you and your program. Don't feel guilty or bad because you don't accept infants. Not everyone does.
This!!!!If you really don't want to take the infant, then don't feel like you have to. Do what works for you. You can't please everyone. I didn't orginally want infants either, but after not having any children I had to relent. It's not impossible to go outside, however newborns take forever to eat. So there will be times that you will have to tend to the baby and won't be able to do whatever with the older ones. I think if you take the infant when you really don't want to, you may end up resenting him or her. Do what works best for you and your program. Don't feel guilty or bad because you don't accept infants. Not everyone does.
I stand true to what kind of program I run and everyone in town knows me as the preschool with extended care. (currently I am the only one who offers extended are with preschool, the rest are half day programs)
I want to be a preschool and want it small and private from my home. I am unique in what I offer and this is what I want.
Unless you want to change your program to tailor to younger ages, then stick to what who you are and what you are about. I think that changing your entire daycare to suit one client is asking a bit much honestly, but at the end of the day, you are the one who has to make that decision.
Also, Like others have stated, I give the younger siblings priority on my wait list. I also network with two other local providers in my city that offers infant care. They know that once the kids turn 20 months, that they are more than likely going to leave to come to my place. not always, but most of the time they do.
If you did want to stay where you are now, is it possible that you could find someone to network with?
Chatter Box 12:17 PM 04-10-2013
I can tell you it is very difficult to juggle the different age groups unless you have help. I do newborn to 3 years. Although I have a 3 year old right now who is in preschool 2 days a week and will be going all week next fall. His mother is pregnant and due in July. So I will have a newborn coming in September-ish and just found out that another mother is pregnant and that baby will be coming in December/January-ish.
It's been a lot to plan for, that is for sure but with my age groups I have a second one going to preschool full-time next fall as well so I will be able to make this work at least. I just replaced older ones with two with 2 two month olds. It seems ever evolving. I feel like I am always destined to have two newborns at once but if my other ones are younger I can manage it.
I started out with 4 and 5 year olds along with the newborns and I just felt like I couldn't give them the educational, outdoors and craft aspect as much because I was so engrossed in feeding, unpredictable pooping & wetting schedules, cooking for the older ones, cleaning up, and getting them all to nap at once...
You can't predict the newborns. They can eat every three hours and then turn around one day and want to eat an hour after they ate, be gassy, have acid reflux...colicky or just plain have separation issues. These two I have now don't cry... they scream, no tears. It is dry like dessert. They aren't crying...they want to be held. The more they hold them at home the harder it makes it for them here.
It's normal to a degree for newborns to be this way. There is always going to be an adjustment but I have one that does not give it a rest unless he is held which tells me that his parents hold him non-stop. I've mentioned to them that he definitely lets me know he wants to be held all day. I am hopeful that they will start working with this a little bit. It comes down to they will expect me to hold him all day or they will have to pay more for one on one care somewhere else. If that is what they expect here then I cannot provide that because I have to be able to safely cook and do things with the other kids. I don't have the energy to run around with a child strapped to me all day.
It's a big decision. I would just let them know your concerns up front and let them decide. Tell them to let you know what to plan for.
It's been a lot to plan for, that is for sure but with my age groups I have a second one going to preschool full-time next fall as well so I will be able to make this work at least. I just replaced older ones with two with 2 two month olds. It seems ever evolving. I feel like I am always destined to have two newborns at once but if my other ones are younger I can manage it.
I started out with 4 and 5 year olds along with the newborns and I just felt like I couldn't give them the educational, outdoors and craft aspect as much because I was so engrossed in feeding, unpredictable pooping & wetting schedules, cooking for the older ones, cleaning up, and getting them all to nap at once...
You can't predict the newborns. They can eat every three hours and then turn around one day and want to eat an hour after they ate, be gassy, have acid reflux...colicky or just plain have separation issues. These two I have now don't cry... they scream, no tears. It is dry like dessert. They aren't crying...they want to be held. The more they hold them at home the harder it makes it for them here.
It's normal to a degree for newborns to be this way. There is always going to be an adjustment but I have one that does not give it a rest unless he is held which tells me that his parents hold him non-stop. I've mentioned to them that he definitely lets me know he wants to be held all day. I am hopeful that they will start working with this a little bit. It comes down to they will expect me to hold him all day or they will have to pay more for one on one care somewhere else. If that is what they expect here then I cannot provide that because I have to be able to safely cook and do things with the other kids. I don't have the energy to run around with a child strapped to me all day.
It's a big decision. I would just let them know your concerns up front and let them decide. Tell them to let you know what to plan for.
NeedaVaca 12:23 PM 04-10-2013
I will not take infants, there is just no way it would work with the schedule/routine I have. I have a DCB who's parents I know are trying for a 2nd. I am prepared to lose him rather than take the baby.