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  #1  
Old 01-23-2014, 11:32 AM
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Default Have You Ever Been So Upset...

that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime. I had to turn around and walk away, which of course didn't help her mood any.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:43 AM
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Honestly? Yes. Twice I had to walk away from a child. Same child both times.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:44 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josiegirl View Post
that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime.
I had a kid (4.5) attack my own child (1.5). It wasn't a hit, it was a two fisted, pummeling attack. As I ran across the yard shouting for him to stop, he just hit more and harder. I pickup up my own child to comfort him, and then picked up the other child and put him in the play room and shut the door. It was a good 1/2 hour before I could get myself together enough to go talk to that kid about what happened. I was very scared that I wouldn't be able to maintain control. It was the worst day I have ever had at daycare, and maybe one of my worst days of my life...I have never been more scared or felt more out of control in my life.

I think that instinct just took over and made me put that kid in the room alone, because all I was thinking was to give him back some of what he doled out. I have NEVER spanked a kid, slapped a hand, or used ANY sort of physical force on a child (other than restraining one that was out of control with a bear hug), but that day, I could have so easily done it.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:44 AM
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Yep and you are so awesome for admitting it

Time out really only works when the adult takes them.....

Hope your day get's better.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:44 AM
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that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime.
Absolutely, and good for you for realizing you needed a breather.

Would it help if I tell you that tomorrow is Friday?
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:47 AM
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Yep! Currently I have all the kids in there play pins, in there room (where they nap) scraming bloody murder because no one wants to nap. Its not a new thing. Same time everyday. And when you talk to the parents they say "oh they lay down just fine at home" Yep of course they do. My own DD lays down no problem because I really DO work with her. So yes, I think we as people can only handle so much, and we all just have to walk away sometimes.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josiegirl View Post
that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime. I had to turn around and walk away, which of course didn't help her mood any.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:49 AM
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Yes, today in fact. I have an almost 2.5 yo child who has been throwing things and smile when I tell him not to, has been hitting with blankets, taking toys, throwing fits, kicked my dog, hit and kicked my walls....

I had to sit him down multiple times and walk away.

I think it's totally normal to get that frustrated, especially when it's the same kid every day! I'm sure we have all been there.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josiegirl View Post
that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime. I had to turn around and walk away, which of course didn't help her mood any.
Yep! Just walk away...
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:54 AM
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Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post

Time out really only works when the adult takes them.....
I thought of this today! I remember someone had a thread a couple of months ago about her having to take a time out.
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:54 AM
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aww man! I bet you're shaking...and yes, we've all been there.



I hope that baby is being sweet to you today. You've been under a lot of stress this week the new kiddo in the house. You'll make it. Maybe a cocktail is in order tonight? Or some herbal tea once she settles down?
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Old 01-23-2014, 11:56 AM
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ABSOLUTELY! We are just human.

I have never spanked my own kids.

I had a child I cared for, around 5 years old at the time, once bite my pre crawling infant (my now 5yo) so hard it drew blood. The sobbing gasps from my own child, the BLOOD, I was RIGHT THERE and he refused to unclamp his jaws. I had to pinch both sides of his cheeks and stick my fingers in his mouth, in between his teeth and wiggle/open his jaw to make him stop. I had my dd and older dcg move him into the kitchen, to top it all off, he actually said "haha" once he stopped biting him. I didn't even look at him again. I called his mother for immediate pick up, packed his things and that was that. I termed them IMMEDIATELY. I will never forget that feeling. I was shaking like a leaf, my heart started to race and I KNEW I would not be able to control myself. Very scary feeling to KNOW that you are out of control. I have plans in place when I feel stressed or overwhelmed now. I have people to call, grab bags for things for the kids to do.
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:14 PM
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Oh wow daycarediva, I would've been livid. He must've been a problem to begin with because most 5 yo are way past that biting thing. Yikes!

Heidi, so far the baby hasn't napped today. I either had to hold her all a.m. or put her in the highchair and let her cry, just so I could get things done. She's been crying the whole quiet time.
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:17 PM
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Today must be a bad day all over!

Can it be the end of Friday please!!!!
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:23 PM
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Oh yes, I have definitely thought about it. Of course never acted on it though. I actually quit yesterday morning. I had 3 dcb's and they were all screaming and throwing fits at the same time. I looked at my husband and said, that's it, I quit!! LOL! It's only natural that we feel that way sometimes.

I have said before that as frustrated as we get and as much crapola we get from some of these kids, I totally get how some people that you see on the news lose it. Seriously look how frustrated we all get and we're not off balanced. Imagine being just a little off in the head and having a child screaming all day. I am deeply disturbed by people that abuse children, but honestly if you're not 100% right in the head, I can see how it happens.
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daycarediva View Post
ABSOLUTELY! We are just human.

I have never spanked my own kids.

I had a child I cared for, around 5 years old at the time, once bite my pre crawling infant (my now 5yo) so hard it drew blood. The sobbing gasps from my own child, the BLOOD, I was RIGHT THERE and he refused to unclamp his jaws. I had to pinch both sides of his cheeks and stick my fingers in his mouth, in between his teeth and wiggle/open his jaw to make him stop. I had my dd and older dcg move him into the kitchen, to top it all off, he actually said "haha" once he stopped biting him. I didn't even look at him again. I called his mother for immediate pick up, packed his things and that was that. I termed them IMMEDIATELY. I will never forget that feeling. I was shaking like a leaf, my heart started to race and I KNEW I would not be able to control myself. Very scary feeling to KNOW that you are out of control. I have plans in place when I feel stressed or overwhelmed now. I have people to call, grab bags for things for the kids to do.


OMG OMG OMG

What gets a kid THAT old to act THAT crazy? Please tell me about the kid... everything you can think of.
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:48 PM
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I have felt that way a few times but of course never acted on it. I rarely spank my own children.

1st time was when a dcb (3) bit a daycare girl over a toy and left a mark. Thankfully no blood like what happened to you!

2nd time is when a dcb (4) was here. His first day and my son started crying when I left to stir lunch. He stopped crying then right after dcb says shut up! I ran into the room and he was choking my then 6 week old son! Mom came right away and I terminated. She never did say sorry or ask if he was ok. The mom had a 2 week old baby at home
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:50 PM
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daycarediva, I just about cried I was so livid when I read your post! OMG.

We've all been there to different degrees. Sometimes I miss working in a childcare center for a moment because I would remove kids into another classroom if I felt like I was loosing control (or sanity).
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Old 01-23-2014, 12:52 PM
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Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo View Post
Oh yes, I have definitely thought about it. Of course never acted on it though. I actually quit yesterday morning. I had 3 dcb's and they were all screaming and throwing fits at the same time. I looked at my husband and said, that's it, I quit!! LOL! It's only natural that we feel that way sometimes.

I have said before that as frustrated as we get and as much crapola we get from some of these kids, I totally get how some people that you see on the news lose it. Seriously look how frustrated we all get and we're not off balanced. Imagine being just a little off in the head and having a child screaming all day. I am deeply disturbed by people that abuse children, but honestly if you're not 100% right in the head, I can see how it happens.
I've "quit" before!
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Old 01-23-2014, 01:35 PM
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Originally Posted by daycarediva View Post
ABSOLUTELY! We are just human.

I have never spanked my own kids.

I had a child I cared for, around 5 years old at the time, once bite my pre crawling infant (my now 5yo) so hard it drew blood. The sobbing gasps from my own child, the BLOOD, I was RIGHT THERE and he refused to unclamp his jaws. I had to pinch both sides of his cheeks and stick my fingers in his mouth, in between his teeth and wiggle/open his jaw to make him stop. I had my dd and older dcg move him into the kitchen, to top it all off, he actually said "haha" once he stopped biting him. I didn't even look at him again. I called his mother for immediate pick up, packed his things and that was that. I termed them IMMEDIATELY. I will never forget that feeling. I was shaking like a leaf, my heart started to race and I KNEW I would not be able to control myself. Very scary feeling to KNOW that you are out of control. I have plans in place when I feel stressed or overwhelmed now. I have people to call, grab bags for things for the kids to do.
Just reading this, and the other post about the older dck attacking the little one brought tears to my eyes. I would have such a hard time overcoming my instinct as a mom to protect my baby. A child like that has severe issues.
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Old 01-23-2014, 02:09 PM
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Yup! Multiple times. And I fully believe it makes me a good provider for admitting it. I tell all incoming clients that too. I know my triggers and know when to walk away. I would never hurt a child becaue I know when I need a break.

I'm so proud that you walked away! You are amazing!!!
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Old 01-23-2014, 03:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Josiegirl View Post
that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime. I had to turn around and walk away, which of course didn't help her mood any.
Honestly...no. I've been frustrated but the reason I like working with babies/toddlers is because they are learning and we have so much influence in their life. I worked with adults for 20+years and they were the ones that I thought about smacking (not really).

I have one now that is 19 months and when is is good, he is good and sooooo cute, but when he is bad, oh he is terrible. I just remain consistent and never let up or give him any slack.

I think it's fantastic you are admitting this because it's very important to talk about and get help should you feel like you may ever harm a child.
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Old 01-23-2014, 03:38 PM
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For sure! I've been known to say "you're lucky you're not mine!" LOL

It's the hardest when it's something that you would never tolerate from your own children and caring for others - you are very limited on what you can do.

You done good honey!
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Old 01-23-2014, 03:43 PM
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Yes i have
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Old 01-23-2014, 04:10 PM
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Only once! I was young and I was watching my little cousin.She wouldn't stop screaming for her mom.She was all red faced,sweating and every time I came near her to calm her down she would kick,hit,bite and pinch me. I had an image of me just kicking her across the room in a fit of rage so I called my Aunt and told her to come back because I was afraid I was going to hurt her. I was only 12 at the time so I took a few years off from babysitting and took courses again before I ever watched anyone else.I truly was a second away from hurting her. I'm glad I listened to my next thought "What would Jesus do?" That was a big saying back then!,Lol
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Old 01-23-2014, 04:20 PM
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I have been lucky that I have never really had kids with aggression issues but I had a 3 year old who spent his entire day cursing at me. He would just repeatedly scream stupid B whenever he was asked to do anything. He poured milk down my vents and the final straw was when he told me he was just going to kill himself if I put him down for a nap.

Unfortunately, they were the first family I ever had and I had 4 of their children. I figured it must just be because I was new so I stuck with it for 3 entire weeks where I honestly cried in the morning because I knew I was going to have to spend the day with them.

Not anymore. I no longer have a problem giving notice lol
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Old 01-23-2014, 04:27 PM
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Yes, I have, but I wanted to do more than spank him.

I had an 11 yo slug my 9 yo dd in the chest because she got a drop of water on his new jacket. We were in the car and I hit a bump as she was taking a drink of water. I slammed my car into park in the middle of the street and made the kid get out and sit on the curb until my dd could breathe right and I could calm down.

I termed him that day. I was so happy to never see him again. His parents were beyond ticked at him.
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Old 01-23-2014, 05:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care View Post
For sure! I've been known to say "you're lucky you're not mine!" LOL

It's the hardest when it's something that you would never tolerate from your own children and caring for others - you are very limited on what you can do.

You done good honey!
Haha My most often used line is "It's a good thing you're so darn cute". Course I've used your line a time or two also.
High five for all of us getting through the day. But I had an appt. at 5 tonight and they took my blood pressure. Not good. It's the highest it's ever been.
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Old 01-23-2014, 05:39 PM
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Originally Posted by daycarediva View Post
ABSOLUTELY! We are just human.

I have never spanked my own kids.

I had a child I cared for, around 5 years old at the time, once bite my pre crawling infant (my now 5yo) so hard it drew blood. The sobbing gasps from my own child, the BLOOD, I was RIGHT THERE and he refused to unclamp his jaws. I had to pinch both sides of his cheeks and stick my fingers in his mouth, in between his teeth and wiggle/open his jaw to make him stop. I had my dd and older dcg move him into the kitchen, to top it all off, he actually said "haha" once he stopped biting him. I didn't even look at him again. I called his mother for immediate pick up, packed his things and that was that. I termed them IMMEDIATELY. I will never forget that feeling. I was shaking like a leaf, my heart started to race and I KNEW I would not be able to control myself. Very scary feeling to KNOW that you are out of control. I have plans in place when I feel stressed or overwhelmed now. I have people to call, grab bags for things for the kids to do.
This brought tears to my eyes. Hugs to you and your little one. Good Lord.
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Old 01-23-2014, 06:07 PM
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I have felt that way a few times but of course never acted on it. I rarely spank my own children.

2nd time is when a dcb (4) was here. His first day and my son started crying when I left to stir lunch. He stopped crying then right after dcb says shut up! I ran into the room and he was choking my then 6 week old son! Mom came right away and I terminated. She never did say sorry or ask if he was ok. The mom had a 2 week old baby at home


Wow.....
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Old 01-23-2014, 06:10 PM
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Wow.....
It was really scary! Even thinking about again gets me upset all over again!
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Old 01-24-2014, 04:00 AM
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Honestly...no. I've been frustrated but the reason I like working with babies/toddlers is because they are learning and we have so much influence in their life. I worked with adults for 20+years and they were the ones that I thought about smacking (not really).

I have one now that is 19 months and when is is good, he is good and sooooo cute, but when he is bad, oh he is terrible. I just remain consistent and never let up or give him any slack.

I think it's fantastic you are admitting this because it's very important to talk about and get help should you feel like you may ever harm a child.
I think this is an important piece. I have children of multiple ages as do most in home providers. I have NEVER felt that upset with children under 3 - most of the behavior is age appropriate (even the tantrums), and typically redirection, reminders, and lots of positive attention/supervision make most issues minor. It sounds as if the OP, and others who have come forward, are speaking of children who are ages 3+, not infant and toddlers, but preschoolers and in some cases almost school aged children.
Most of my dc clients have said that they find the several months just before K to be AWFUL in terms of their child's behavior. One of my most staunch non-spanking clients said this was the time that if she had spanked, she would have.
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Old 01-24-2014, 05:51 AM
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Yep! Once while I was working in a center in the ones class I got punched in the face by a 15 month old. Closed fist punch right to my nose. I stood up and walked out of the room leaving my co-worker out of ratio. I went about 10 steps down to the office and told the 3people sitting in the computer watching YouTube that someone needs to go in there while I collect myself. This kid was VIOLENT all the time and that punch was completely on purpose.
P.s. I've had to walk away more than that time, but just thought I would share an example with you
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Old 01-24-2014, 05:55 AM
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Originally Posted by Josiegirl View Post
that you literally had to walk away for fear of spanking a child??
O M G the 3 yo is throwing a major temper tantrum right this minute. Smack dab in the middle of naptime. I had to turn around and walk away, which of course didn't help her mood any.
I would for sure send the kid home before reaching that point

hugs to you
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Old 01-24-2014, 10:55 AM
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What about a parent?
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Old 01-24-2014, 11:14 AM
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Today must be a bad day all over!

Can it be the end of Friday please!!!!
Omg, why is today so bad??!??? I'm having a horrible time here, too. I had 3 dcks assigned to their own spots on the floor with a bin of toys in front of them because they hsd just fotten out of control. I hate feeling this upset with the kids, but this day (this whole week really) has just been crazy! And to top it off, it's my sons 3rd birthday, and I've been "mean miss laura" all morning
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Old 01-24-2014, 11:17 AM
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Omg, why is today so bad??!??? I'm having a horrible time here, too. I had 3 dcks assigned to their own spots on the floor with a bin of toys in front of them because they hsd just fotten out of control. I hate feeling this upset with the kids, but this day (this whole week really) has just been crazy! And to top it off, it's my sons 3rd birthday, and I've been "mean miss laura" all morning
Oh don't worry, my 3 yo dcg didn't like me earlier because I wouldn't let her watch a show. She was not listening to the rules at the sensory table so we didn't get a special treat of watching something.

She likes me now though.

It has been the whole week!
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Old 01-24-2014, 11:18 AM
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Have we all been stuck inside this week? I know here, everybody's crawling the walls. We're almost breaking zero out there. A whole week of not even breathing the fresh air for 5 minutes. I may try it this afternoon. Heck, 0 is a frikkin heat wave now.
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Old 01-24-2014, 11:41 AM
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Have we all been stuck inside this week? I know here, everybody's crawling the walls. We're almost breaking zero out there. A whole week of not even breathing the fresh air for 5 minutes. I may try it this afternoon. Heck, 0 is a frikkin heat wave now.
Yes we have and that's the problem! Right now it's 4, but with the windchill it feels like it's -18! My dd's school even cancelled school today!
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Old 01-24-2014, 06:56 PM
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Default We super providers..

Gosh, we are good humans!!! I had one three year old who used to knock on my face with his head all the time, one day it came unexpectedly, he knocked me so hard on my mouth that he cracked my tooth, two months after I had to spent four thousand dollars to have a tooth implant. It`s so sad to hear all of these horrible things about little kids, but unfortunately some might have some kind of mental problems. My little "devil" does have it, so today I do understand why he acted like that. Today he is older and once in while he cries to come inside the daycare to hug me and tell me how much he loves me. The most important thing is just to walk away, never take it personal and try to figure out why that child is acting like that. For the first 4 to 6 weeks or until a child get used to the new environment it`s normal for s/he to cry.
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Old 01-24-2014, 07:51 PM
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I had a little boy I watched before I was licensed who bit my son a few times. He was just a little baby, like 5-6mos old. I tried to keep the baby away from him and put him up in the high chair if I was making meals or something. I heard my baby cry and look to see the DCB biting his foot. Poor baby couldn't even get out of his high chair or move away from him. I felt horrible. He broke the skin and everything. I only watched him one time after that. His aunt told me to smack his mouth when he does it. I have had a few people tell me to punish their child but obviously we can't. One boy was my best friend's son and I told him numerous times it's a good thing he wasn't my son because he'd get a spanking or severe consequence for that. He was a really naughty boy. I got to the point of crying a few times because I just didn't know what to do. It was just so hard to deal with him and not ruin my 20yr friendship with his mom. Both her kids were crazy!!
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Old 01-24-2014, 09:37 PM
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I have one dcg (dcg1)that has been with me for 2 years now. She is almost 3. When I started watching her she was 11 months old. She is one of my more difficult children to care for. She has always been the way I am about to talk about.....If she sees 1 or several children playing in an area together, she will walk into the middle of that play area and stand there and look at the children playing. If one of them touches her (by accident or intentionally softly) she will yell "Hey, stop it, or scream ouch and bend down and hold the area that has been touched. Or sometimes she will see a child playing with a toy and then put that toy down for a second to do something. Dcg1 will walk over and grab the toy and hold it in front of the other child so that they can see that she now has the toy. If the child grabs for the toy dcg1 will scream and cry that the toy was taken from her. Or if the child that had the toy in the beginning sees that dcg1 now has the toy, but decides that they doesn't want it anymore, dcg1 will waive the toy in front of the child and say heeeeeeey. This dcg1 rarely plays with other children. She plays alone for the most part. She rarely participates in circle time or group activities. She doesn't like to color or draw or practice writing letters or numbers. If I force her to participate it activities like circle time or writing, tracing, coloring her name or any other beneficial pre k exercises...or games for that matter she will either scream, cry, bend down and sit and cry, or look straight at me and say No.
When she cries for long periods of time I put her in the other room in a pack n play. I tell her that as soon as she is done crying to call for me and I will come and get her. And she does. She will cry for several minutes and then call for me. I will come in and ask if she got all the crying out. She says yes. I pick her up and ask if I can have a hug. She always gives me one and I just hold her. Then I take her in the bathroom and wash her face off with a paper towel.
I have talked to her mom about what I just talked about. There has been a traumatic parent split up and moving around in the past year. The behaviors where there from the beginning though. They just intensified over the past year.
Do these behaviors sound odd to any of you? Do they seem like a behavior that would come from a 1 to 3 year old? She actually has not had her 3rd birthday yet. I have never seen these behaviors in a child this young. Thanks for reading and I look forward to your input.
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Old 01-24-2014, 10:04 PM
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^^ sadly yes! I have seen these behaviors in a sibling set. The business about toys and taunting others, taking things as soon as someone puts it down and just holds it, doesn't actually play with it, like just to be the one to take it. Then teasing someone because they have it now. They both do that. He learned it from sister. He doesn't like people near him, cries and swats at people, isn't good at sharing, taking turns... The DCB didn't like to participate, didn't like to do crafts, didn't like being messy or wet... I would also put him in the PNP when he threw fits and when he calms down he can come out. He wasn't even 2! The sister is now 4 and it's always hard to get her to participate. She says "my mom said I don't have to do that..." Or "But J did that..." or some excuse. It was super frustrating. He goes to Jr Preschool with other already 2yr olds (all enrolled in the Fall at 2 so now 2.5+) and I watched him last week one day and he was awful! Worse than before. Attacking his sister if she took his toy or hitting her or the other boys. Very whiney, very possessive! Reminded me of why I was glad to see them go! But this mom is in major denial about it. Thinks it's perfectly normal!
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Old 01-25-2014, 08:49 AM
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Default That is a warning sign to me.

I've actually had a child who has made me feel that way more than once with uncontrollable crying all day every day and so I knew it was time for her to go elsewhere. If I ever feel that way towards a child, it is a warning to me that we're not a good fit and it's best if we part ways.
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Old 01-26-2014, 10:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TwinKristi View Post
^^ sadly yes! I have seen these behaviors in a sibling set. The business about toys and taunting others, taking things as soon as someone puts it down and just holds it, doesn't actually play with it, like just to be the one to take it. Then teasing someone because they have it now. They both do that. He learned it from sister. He doesn't like people near him, cries and swats at people, isn't good at sharing, taking turns... The DCB didn't like to participate, didn't like to do crafts, didn't like being messy or wet... I would also put him in the PNP when he threw fits and when he calms down he can come out. He wasn't even 2! The sister is now 4 and it's always hard to get her to participate. She says "my mom said I don't have to do that..." Or "But J did that..." or some excuse. It was super frustrating. He goes to Jr Preschool with other already 2yr olds (all enrolled in the Fall at 2 so now 2.5+) and I watched him last week one day and he was awful! Worse than before. Attacking his sister if she took his toy or hitting her or the other boys. Very whiney, very possessive! Reminded me of why I was glad to see them go! But this mom is in major denial about it. Thinks it's perfectly normal!
Was there anything that would help the dcb feel more secure in his environment? Or now looking back can you offer any advise? I really want to make the day go more smoothly while dcg is here. Last week I was watching my assistant with her. My assistant was bribing her with toys and objects "a Leaf that she wanted" to get her to clean up, eat and participate in group time activities. ...I do not like bribing the children at all. I think it teaches bad perceptions of how things "should be". I try to teach the children that we do things because we need to or want to without getting something in return.
The bribing was working like a charm though. I talked to her mom about it at the end of the week. Dcm said that she does the same thing......
Many times I want to term the family. But I get really scared when I think about lil dcg being with someone else. I'm afraid that the other daycare won't understand her and she will be hurt or neglected. Is this completely insane for me to think this way?
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Old 01-27-2014, 03:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AngiesCareXYZ View Post
Was there anything that would help the dcb feel more secure in his environment? Or now looking back can you offer any advise? I really want to make the day go more smoothly while dcg is here. Last week I was watching my assistant with her. My assistant was bribing her with toys and objects "a Leaf that she wanted" to get her to clean up, eat and participate in group time activities. ...I do not like bribing the children at all. I think it teaches bad perceptions of how things "should be". I try to teach the children that we do things because we need to or want to without getting something in return.
The bribing was working like a charm though. I talked to her mom about it at the end of the week. Dcm said that she does the same thing......
Many times I want to term the family. But I get really scared when I think about lil dcg being with someone else. I'm afraid that the other daycare won't understand her and she will be hurt or neglected. Is this completely insane for me to think this way?
If you keep this child, you and your assistant BOTH need to be on the same page. Perhaps a sticker chart for ALL the children for cleaning up? Kids who fill their chart may be able to chose a special treat (I go to the $ store and pick out some inexpensive things) but I would not be bribing one child or allowing my assistant to bribe one child to do things.
But I want to speak to the last sentence - I've heard this a lot from providers. Years ago I kept a child who was just NOT a good fit. I felt as you did. But now that she has moved on to school, I wish I would have let her go. Just because I didn't have the key to this child doesn't mean someone else wouldn't have. I've come to think that maybe instead of "saving" her, I deprived her of the chance to have a really awesome early childhood experience. Just another idea.
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