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Old 09-28-2017, 09:03 AM
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Default Baby Dropped Off Without Log

Would you be firm about this?

So this is about my new bf infant who struggles with bottle feed and mom is, um, less than accurate in her communication.

Baby has begun sleeping better thru the night and he sleeps well for me. This morning mom told me that he woke up at 7:45 but didn't seem interested in feeding. She dropped off at about 8:10 or so. She also said she didn't have time to fill out his log book.

So I tried to feed him just now, since I didn't know if he was hungry or not, but since he is also not great at bottle feeding, I didn't know if he was fighting me because he was having a bad day on the bottle or if he wasn't hungry.

He also doesn't love his pacifier, which has been obvious to me from day one, and which mom finally admitted yesterday after having previously done a big "the lambie pacifier is his favorite so that's the one we'll pack for you" routine the first week.

So right now he's crying in his bouncy chair, not tired, I'm not sure if he's hungry, and I need to get a couple of things done.

So I'm left wondering if he was truly "not interested" in food this morning or was mom just anxious to drop off?

I'm willing to help families...but not really knowing anything and not being able to believe mom is pretty bad. I'm wondering if I should say that he needs to have been fed before drop off and the log book needs to be filled out no matter what. But then...mom is perfectly capable of saying that he ate when he didn't, so I don't know if I can go there.
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Old 09-28-2017, 09:11 AM
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What kind of log do you require? Is this in your policies? Always stand firm on your policies or take them out if they aren't important enough for you to stick to. Parents lie and bend the truth all the time to what they think we want to hear. The fact that she was honest with you in saying she tried and didn't seem interested makes me think maybe she's telling the truth, versus just telling you he fed at x:xx.

I don't have any young infant but I do have one under one. All that I require is that the parent tell me their last feeding and the amount. There is a spot for it on the infant daily report that I fill out until a parent tells me they don't want it anymore. My current youngest is 10 months and I still fill it out for him. The next oldest I filled it out for maybe 3 weeks and mom said she didn't need it anymore. I just made sure she told me his last feeding everyday before leaving and I told them at pick up when I las fed him.

In all my research all I've found is that a child will not starve themselves. If they are hungry enough they will eat. You just need to go about your day and decide (and place in your policies) when the crying is too much and require pickup after that time has passed.
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Old 09-28-2017, 09:28 AM
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What kind of log do you require?
It's pretty much wake up time (so I can guess when the next nap will be) , last feed, and last diaper.

Yes, with this mom, I'm going to insist that the log book be filled out. I'm not even sure if it's in my policies, but it doesn't matter. I feel like if I'm making a reasonable request for reasons that are simply about making a situation work well, then I expect a parent to listen up.

I'll probably simply say, "I DO really need the log book filled out each day. It makes it much harder to meet baby's needs well if I don't have info on what happened previously."

There's just that line where certain things make a huge difference.
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Old 09-28-2017, 09:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Two View Post
It's pretty much wake up time (so I can guess when the next nap will be) , last feed, and last diaper.

Yes, with this mom, I'm going to insist that the log book be filled out. I'm not even sure if it's in my policies, but it doesn't matter. I feel like if I'm making a reasonable request for reasons that are simply about making a situation work well, then I expect a parent to listen up.

I'll probably simply say, "I DO really need the log book filled out each day. It makes it much harder to meet baby's needs well if I don't have info on what happened previously."

There's just that line where certain things make a huge difference.
I have a log but it's mostly to let me know if he's getting picked up early etc. Dcm tells me too but the book is a back up in case she forgets lol. She doesn't fill it out for "lasts" etc, but she tells me verbally that basically slept good, ate x amount this morning (diaper I know she changes when she gets him dressed for the day). So it's like a 2 minute conversation, if that. Personally I would be awful at remembering to fill out a log in the mornings, because, mornings are crazy lol. But I'd definitely let a provider know verbally. And if the agreement is she needs to fill it out then that's what she needs to do.

I'd probably just ask her for it each morning and do a quick glance before she left so I could ask any questions I needed to. If she doesn't have it, then you could decide (before it happens) if you will accept the answers verbally or turn away and have her go back home and get the log.
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Old 09-28-2017, 09:42 AM
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Originally Posted by Mom2Two View Post
It's pretty much wake up time (so I can guess when the next nap will be) , last feed, and last diaper.

Yes, with this mom, I'm going to insist that the log book be filled out. I'm not even sure if it's in my policies, but it doesn't matter. I feel like if I'm making a reasonable request for reasons that are simply about making a situation work well, then I expect a parent to listen up.

I'll probably simply say, "I DO really need the log book filled out each day. It makes it much harder to meet baby's needs well if I don't have info on what happened previously."

There's just that line where certain things make a huge difference.
Is this a book that goes back and forth? Would it be easier for your sanity to use a printed out form? There are ones on the internet if you google "infant daily report" with a "parent corner" where they can write down all the things you listed. I do this with my printed form that only lists last feed but there are others out there that go on more detail. I put it on the counter each morning with a pen, mom comes in fills out the name and information, hands me the child, says goodbye and leaves.
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Old 09-28-2017, 10:29 AM
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I used to worry about that. Anymore I just try to feed, change, play, nap, and repeat. I dont worry about what they do at home. Or when they do it. I get them on a schedule that works for me.
Sometimes they have to cry. It's ok.
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Old 09-28-2017, 10:56 AM
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You guys are great. I think I'll feel comfortable with switching to just verbal when he's a bit older and has a routine. Right now his sleep and eating are still very unpredictable from day to day, and I study that book first thing each morning. So I'm thinking I do still want to stick with the notebook for now.

He's only had a short nap and a tiny amount to eat after three hours here, and has cried non -stop almost, so at the moment I'm just wondering if I want to call for early pick up or wait to talk to mom at the normal time.

On the positive side, he has learned to flip over to his back when I put him down for tummy time, and is showing interest in toys and working on reaching for them.
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Old 09-28-2017, 11:13 AM
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Maybe it would be easier for mom to remember a quick text in the mornings?
That way you have the info and she doesn't have to remember a log
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Originally Posted by Mom2Two View Post
You guys are great. I think I'll feel comfortable with switching to just verbal when he's a bit older and has a routine. Right now his sleep and eating are still very unpredictable from day to day, and I study that book first thing each morning. So I'm thinking I do still want to stick with the notebook for now.

He's only had a short nap and a tiny amount to eat after three hours here, and has cried non -stop almost, so at the moment I'm just wondering if I want to call for early pick up or wait to talk to mom at the normal time.

On the positive side, he has learned to flip over to his back when I put him down for tummy time, and is showing interest in toys and working on reaching for them.
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Old 09-28-2017, 11:25 AM
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Originally Posted by laundrymom View Post
Maybe it would be easier for mom to remember a quick text in the mornings?
That way you have the info and she doesn't have to remember a log
I could ask her if she'd prefer that.

He finally settled onto his bottle and took 4 oz. But the 2+ hours of crying earlier...oy! And holding/wearing/pacifier doesn't stop it.
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Old 09-28-2017, 02:14 PM
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At pick up, I actually didn't even mention the log book--I talked about the crying and napping instead. I'm just not sure if I should have said something. Maybe I should have waited a few days to see if this would be an ongoing problem or not.

I said that dcb had had a rough day and had cried for 2.5 hour and didn't nap well. I had been feeling a bit edgy about it because (1) the crying was rough--not even being held would fix it and he doesn't take a paci; and (2) at drop off mom had been asking me how i got him to take naps and I started imagining that she would have him nap a ton at home so he wouldn't nap here, and (3) he'd slept til 7:45 then got here by 8:10am.

I told mom that if he was like this everyday, that I wouldn't keep him, because there was such a list of other things that were hard with him (feeding, no paci etc). I suggested that if dcb was sleeping better at night, it might be better to start having him on a bit of a schedule, meaning to wake him up at 7am and feed/change him all ready for daycare.

Mom acted like she'd been bit by something and asked if she needed to start looking. I said "no," that it was just one day so far. Mom said she wanted to try to make this work (i. e. with me).

Idk. I was very plain spoken and blunt about it. I know that others wouldn't worry about what happens at home and just term or call for pick up if it wasn't working. But my nerves were a bit rattled...then another dcg had a nose bleed...and after lunch I just felt like I needed to put on a movie for the kids who are left here now. I wouldn't be looking forward to days like this every day. I could deal with it the first few days, but I'd like to be done with the adjustment soon please!
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Old 09-29-2017, 07:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Two View Post
It's pretty much wake up time (so I can guess when the next nap will be) , last feed, and last diaper.

Yes, with this mom, I'm going to insist that the log book be filled out. I'm not even sure if it's in my policies, but it doesn't matter. I feel like if I'm making a reasonable request for reasons that are simply about making a situation work well, then I expect a parent to listen up.

I'll probably simply say, "I DO really need the log book filled out each day. It makes it much harder to meet baby's needs well if I don't have info on what happened previously."

There's just that line where certain things make a huge difference.
That's something that takes 30 secs to fill out. Rather than sending it back and forth can you put it on your sign in table for her to use as part of signing him in?
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Old 09-29-2017, 11:31 AM
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Yes, it's pretty quick to fill out. I had mom do it at drop off this morning. It's like 2-3 lines for her at the top then I do the rest during dcb's time here.
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