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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>20 Month Old Doesn't Sleep
AuntTami 11:19 AM 03-10-2015
I need help! I have a 20 month old DCB that doesn't sleep. He's been here since before Christmas and we go through this battle nearly every day. I'm getting to a point of terming because I get so frustrated through the day. I haven't yet because I also have his 4 year old sister and only being allowed 3 children, if he goes that's 2/3 of my income, but Im finding myself dreading my days every single day.

He arrives at 6:45 and sometimes he goes back down for a 1 hour morning nap right after arrival, sometimes he doesn't. It depends on his mood right away. If he naps in the morning, he's in a great mood until nap time. Then at nap time he only sleeps for an hour to an hour and a half and wakes up whiny and crabby and cries off and on for the rest of the day. It also wakes up the other two because hes crying/screaming.

If he doesn't go back down, he's crabby, whiny, and crying off and on until nap time. Usually if I keep him up, he sleeps for 2 1/2-3 hours and then is fine in the afternoon.

Today I kept him up this morning, and he was whiny but not as bad as normal. I put him down for nap at normal time(noon) and he slept for an hour, and woke up crying/screaming so loud that I had to get him up or he would have woken up everyone else. He's in my arms smuggling, but not sleeping, but as soon as I put him down to go play, or put him back in bed, he starts crying and screaming again and this will continue until pick up time at 4:30.

I don't know what to do. It's not changing. I've tried sepersting him from the other kids for nap and it's worse. He screams himself to sleep then falls asleep and is up after an hour regardless of whether he took an AM nap or not. I've tried music; white noise; later naps; earlier naps; blacking out the curtains; I don't know what else to do but I'm losing my mind.

His parents say they put him down and let him cry for a few minutes and he fals right to sleep. That doesn't happen here. He'll scream bloody murder for 15-20 minutes and then fall sleep but he's back up in an hour. Sometimes he'll go down easily with minimal crying; but it's usually a battle to get him to even go to sleep.

Not only is he whiny, crabby and screaming for the rest of the day, but my frustration levels go through the roof listening to him daily. He doesn't talk much yet, a few words here and there, so it's mostly just screaming at the top of his lungs.

Help. I'm losing my mind
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jessica55418 12:00 PM 03-10-2015
I have the same problem with a 17 month old. She doesn't cry but she is very LOUD (laughing and talking). I had to separate her so the others can sleep. I know your frustration. If the child is disrupting the group and causing you to hate your job, he probably isn't a good fit for your daycare.
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Baby Beluga 01:11 PM 03-10-2015
Originally Posted by AuntTami:
I need help! I have a 20 month old DCB that doesn't sleep. He's been here since before Christmas and we go through this battle nearly every day. I'm getting to a point of terming because I get so frustrated through the day. I haven't yet because I also have his 4 year old sister and only being allowed 3 children, if he goes that's 2/3 of my income, but Im finding myself dreading my days every single day.

He arrives at 6:45 and sometimes he goes back down for a 1 hour morning nap right after arrival, sometimes he doesn't. It depends on his mood right away. If he naps in the morning, he's in a great mood until nap time. Then at nap time he only sleeps for an hour to an hour and a half and wakes up whiny and crabby and cries off and on for the rest of the day. It also wakes up the other two because hes crying/screaming.

If he doesn't go back down, he's crabby, whiny, and crying off and on until nap time. Usually if I keep him up, he sleeps for 2 1/2-3 hours and then is fine in the afternoon.

Today I kept him up this morning, and he was whiny but not as bad as normal. I put him down for nap at normal time(noon) and he slept for an hour, and woke up crying/screaming so loud that I had to get him up or he would have woken up everyone else. He's in my arms smuggling, but not sleeping, but as soon as I put him down to go play, or put him back in bed, he starts crying and screaming again and this will continue until pick up time at 4:30.

I don't know what to do. It's not changing. I've tried sepersting him from the other kids for nap and it's worse. He screams himself to sleep then falls asleep and is up after an hour regardless of whether he took an AM nap or not. I've tried music; white noise; later naps; earlier naps; blacking out the curtains; I don't know what else to do but I'm losing my mind.

His parents say they put him down and let him cry for a few minutes and he fals right to sleep. That doesn't happen here. He'll scream bloody murder for 15-20 minutes and then fall sleep but he's back up in an hour. Sometimes he'll go down easily with minimal crying; but it's usually a battle to get him to even go to sleep.

Not only is he whiny, crabby and screaming for the rest of the day, but my frustration levels go through the roof listening to him daily. He doesn't talk much yet, a few words here and there, so it's mostly just screaming at the top of his lungs.

Help. I'm losing my mind
On a normal day what happens when he wakes up? Do you always snuggle with him when he gets up?
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AuntTami 01:17 PM 03-10-2015
Originally Posted by Baby Beluga:
On a normal day what happens when he wakes up? Do you always snuggle with him when he gets up?
No. It was just today because I couldn't handle listening to him and I didn't want him to wake everyone else up and have them all crying too.

On a normal day, if he's up after an hour to an hour and a half, I go in and lay him back down, give him a quick pat, turn on the music bear that we use when everyone goes down initially and I walk back out of the room. He then lays there and cries/whines/screams until nap is over or until he's woken everyone else up.

Yesterday morning, he didn't nap in the AM but he slept for 3 1/2 hours for nap.
Today he didn't nap either, but after an hour he was up screaming. I did my ritual of patting, music etc and Let him cry for 15-20 minutes. But then everyone else started to stir and move around so I went in and got him so everyone wasn't woken ip
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Play Care 01:43 PM 03-10-2015
Could he be teething? 2 year molars?

What do his parents say about his sleep? If they are they type to chuckle fondly "oh he's *always* been a terrible sleeper!" then you know this is just how he is...

There are some ladies on here who are always interviewing, even when they are full just in case they want to replace a family. Maybe start putting feelers out?

Good Luck!
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Baby Beluga 02:05 PM 03-10-2015
Originally Posted by AuntTami:
No. It was just today because I couldn't handle listening to him and I didn't want him to wake everyone else up and have them all crying too.

On a normal day, if he's up after an hour to an hour and a half, I go in and lay him back down, give him a quick pat, turn on the music bear that we use when everyone goes down initially and I walk back out of the room. He then lays there and cries/whines/screams until nap is over or until he's woken everyone else up.

Yesterday morning, he didn't nap in the AM but he slept for 3 1/2 hours for nap.
Today he didn't nap either, but after an hour he was up screaming. I did my ritual of patting, music etc and Let him cry for 15-20 minutes. But then everyone else started to stir and move around so I went in and got him so everyone wasn't woken ip
I'm stumped then! Is is possible that he is too hot or cold?
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AuntTami 02:35 PM 03-10-2015
Originally Posted by Play Care:
Could he be teething? 2 year molars?

What do his parents say about his sleep? If they are they type to chuckle fondly "oh he's *always* been a terrible sleeper!" then you know this is just how he is...

There are some ladies on here who are always interviewing, even when they are full just in case they want to replace a family. Maybe start putting feelers out?

Good Luck!
He could be, but this has been happening since the day he started. I thought it was needing to adjust, then it was Christmas chaos, then I thought he was teething and now I just am stumped!

I've got feelers out for potential interviews. I've never termed before so I'm very nervous if the process. He's a good kid, when he sleeps and isn't exhausted. But I just cant do anything else to help! I don't know what else to do!

They've said that if he sleeps in/goes back for morning nap, then yes he doesn't sleep as long, which is to be expected. But he's SO whiny and crabby, as if he got woken up too early. But he wakes himself up!

He uses one small blanket
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Francine 04:36 PM 03-10-2015
I have a 20 month old that I am actually going to start another tread about but I have to say, he is my worst sleeper......takes the shortest naps of all of my ages and he too is extremely loud : (
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Shell 04:51 PM 03-10-2015
Does he sleep in mom and dad's bed?! Are they being honest when they say he cries for a few minutes and goes right down?!

I'm guessing he is "helped" to sleep- whether it's that he sleeps with his parents, or someone lays with him, whatever it is, he hasn't learned self soothing.

My one dcb like this took time. He was on one nap a day, but would wake up on the 45 minute mark and would scream, cry and carry on.

He slept on a mat here, so I had to make sure to be right there at the 45 minute mark, and immediately lay him back down and stay there for a good amount of time. I would just bring my phone and go on the forum.

He was used to sleeping with mom and dad- which they lied about until I caught them in a lie. The child had Zero self soothing skills because when he woke up, dcm would just hold him until he went back to sleep. Every single night.

It took weeks, but it worked. He was maybe scared to be alone? Even though he wasn't really alone...

Dcm was so proud when she finally put him in the crib and he slept through the night easily...hmm, I wonder who did all the hard work (me, of course)
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AuntTami 01:24 PM 03-12-2015
Originally Posted by Shell:
Does he sleep in mom and dad's bed?! Are they being honest when they say he cries for a few minutes and goes right down?!

I'm guessing he is "helped" to sleep- whether it's that he sleeps with his parents, or someone lays with him, whatever it is, he hasn't learned self soothing.

My one dcb like this took time. He was on one nap a day, but would wake up on the 45 minute mark and would scream, cry and carry on.

He slept on a mat here, so I had to make sure to be right there at the 45 minute mark, and immediately lay him back down and stay there for a good amount of time. I would just bring my phone and go on the forum.

He was used to sleeping with mom and dad- which they lied about until I caught them in a lie. The child had Zero self soothing skills because when he woke up, dcm would just hold him until he went back to sleep. Every single night.

It took weeks, but it worked. He was maybe scared to be alone? Even though he wasn't really alone...

Dcm was so proud when she finally put him in the crib and he slept through the night easily...hmm, I wonder who did all the hard work (me, of course)
They say he sleeps in his crib all night. Idk!

Just when I get frustrated enough to term, we have a day like today where he slept from drop off to almost 9am..... Back down for nap at 12:15, fell asleep immediately and is STILL sound asleep at 3:24.....I don't get it!
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