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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Annoying Parents Lied About Doctors. What Do I Do?
Unregistered 06:27 PM 03-22-2010
I have two daycare children, siblings, 7yr. girl and 2 1/2yr. boy. I sent them both home last Tuesday with pink eye. I told their mom they need to stay home the next day and go to the doctors, to let me know the next day what was going on. I text her on Wednesday asking if they made it to the doc. She says, yes I took them yesterday, they will be there normal time tomorrow. I took this on good faith, they looked better and it was ok. Today I noticed the 2yr. olds eye was looking yucky again and asked the big sister if they finished their medicine from the doctor, she tells me they never went to the doctor! I was so aggitated. What do I do about this particular situation?
I already have had a lot of problems with this family. The daughter will give me attitude constantly and then literally scream and cry when i have her take a time out or tell her she needs to correct her homework. They expect me to make sure her homework is complete as well as her daily reading, and record it all. The boy though, where to begin.
This child will scream blood curdling screams constantly throughout the day for not getting his way, when ever he has time out, which is a lot,at nap time, at potty time, always. He takes from others at every chance, he throws things, brakes things often after being told many many times to not touch, and then they don't get replaced. He yells No! all the time and the list goes on.
I have tried everything I can think of with this child and nothing works and everytime I try to talk to the parents about either child they always have an excuse, he went to the doctor, our neighbor is loud, we had a long weekend, he had a rash, he's teething. I swear this almost 3 year old has been teething for so long he must have more teeth than me by now. I have been caring for these two children since June and it is a horrible headache. They both take so much attention away from all the other kids in the daycare it doesnt seem fair, to me,my assistant, or the other children.
To top it off they under pay me, are late on payments and pick up late a lot with no heads up. I am again debating giving them two weeks. But I feel hesitant because I feel bad as if I could maybe try harder, or don';t want to put them out, nor lose the money. Any suggestions? Please I am desperate.
I already have had a lot of problems with this family. The daughter will give me attitude constantly and then literally scream and cry when i have her take a time out or tell her she needs to correct her homework. They expect me to make sure her homework is complete as well as her daily reading, and record it all. The boy though, where to begin.
This child will scream blood curdling screams constantly throughout the day for not getting his way, when ever he has time out, which is a lot,at nap time, at potty time, always. He takes from others at every chance, he throws things, brakes things often after being told many many times to not touch, and then they don't get replaced. He yells No! all the time and the list goes on.
I have tried everything I can think of with this child and nothing works and everytime I try to talk to the parents about either child they always have an excuse, he went to the doctor, our neighbor is loud, we had a long weekend, he had a rash, he's teething. I swear this almost 3 year old has been teething for so long he must have more teeth than me by now. I have been caring for these two children since June and it is a horrible headache. They both take so much attention away from all the other kids in the daycare it doesnt seem fair, to me,my assistant, or the other children.
To top it off they under pay me, are late on payments and pick up late a lot with no heads up. I am again debating giving them two weeks. But I feel hesitant because I feel bad as if I could maybe try harder, or don';t want to put them out, nor lose the money. Any suggestions? Please I am desperate.
Former Teacher 07:41 PM 03-22-2010
Before you go believing a 7 year old..I would confront the parent. Just ask sweetly "Did Johnny finish his eye medicine from the dr? His eye is starting to get yucky again?" Something along those lines.
Now I am not saying that the girl is lying. You just don't want to jump the gun.
Good luck!
Now I am not saying that the girl is lying. You just don't want to jump the gun.
Good luck!
misol 08:01 PM 03-22-2010
Since his eye is getting yucky again you could send him home again and this time tell mom he needs a doctor's note before he can return.
Unregistered 04:44 AM 03-23-2010
Frankly I would terminate. They are taking advantage of you big time! Parents like these will never change and the kids behavior sounds like no structure at home. Find a parent that will respect you! Been there done that... it will not get better and you deserve more respect.
gbcc 04:49 AM 03-23-2010
I would request a Dr's statement that they did indeed see the Dr. on whatever date was claimed. If they can not come up with one, then honestly I would terminate immediately. That is highly contagious and she put other families directly at risk only for her own advantages.
During this whole swine flu pandemic, I had a parent send thier child with the cough that came after. Later the child disclosed it was swine flu as if he was proud of it. I questioned the mom and she admitted she couldn't take any more time off of work and he was vomitting over the wkend. The Dr. said it was swine flu and he should stay home until Wednesday of that wk. I terminated care that wk. Not only am I responsible for others children but I also have my own child to worry about.
During this whole swine flu pandemic, I had a parent send thier child with the cough that came after. Later the child disclosed it was swine flu as if he was proud of it. I questioned the mom and she admitted she couldn't take any more time off of work and he was vomitting over the wkend. The Dr. said it was swine flu and he should stay home until Wednesday of that wk. I terminated care that wk. Not only am I responsible for others children but I also have my own child to worry about.
Daycare Mommy 05:11 AM 03-23-2010
Originally Posted by misol:
Since his eye is getting yucky again you could send him home again and this time tell mom he needs a doctor's note before he can return.
Since his eye is getting yucky again you could send him home again and this time tell mom he needs a doctor's note before he can return.
Originally Posted by gbcc:
I would request a Dr's statement that they did indeed see the Dr. on whatever date was claimed. If they can not come up with one, then honestly I would terminate immediately. That is highly contagious and she put other families directly at risk only for her own advantages.
I'd do both of these. If there is any discrepancy then I'd give notice then and there. We have other families children in our care and can't have parents pulling stuff like this (if is is indeed true). Doesn't sound like it'd be a big loss with the kids' and parents' behavior at least. Best of luck to you in sorting this out. I would request a Dr's statement that they did indeed see the Dr. on whatever date was claimed. If they can not come up with one, then honestly I would terminate immediately. That is highly contagious and she put other families directly at risk only for her own advantages.
Crystal 08:24 AM 03-23-2010
One of my policies: if your child is sent home from care due to illness that requires medical attention, they cannot return without a doctor's note that states the medical condition, and WHEN they can return to care.
And, if Mom really did this, I would terminate. There is no way I would EVER allow a parent to INTENTIONALLY expose other children in care, as ell as my own family to contagious illnesses (except for a cold)
And, if Mom really did this, I would terminate. There is no way I would EVER allow a parent to INTENTIONALLY expose other children in care, as ell as my own family to contagious illnesses (except for a cold)
Unregistered 10:06 AM 03-23-2010
I'd be asking the mom. If she did lie, I'd terminate immediately. And then plan for a complaint to be made against you. She will likely be vindictive, and the way she can get back at you is to make a complaint. So document this incident clearly. Moms who would lie about this, would lie to a licensor.
Former Teacher 04:46 PM 03-23-2010
Originally Posted by Crystal:
One of my policies: if your child is sent home from care due to illness that requires medical attention, they cannot return without a doctor's note that states the medical condition, and WHEN they can return to care.
And, if Mom really did this, I would terminate. There is no way I would EVER allow a parent to INTENTIONALLY expose other children in care, as ell as my own family to contagious illnesses (except for a cold)
I have a REALLY silly question Crystal. You said you require a doctors note for illness that requires medical attention. Without appearing stupid One of my policies: if your child is sent home from care due to illness that requires medical attention, they cannot return without a doctor's note that states the medical condition, and WHEN they can return to care.
And, if Mom really did this, I would terminate. There is no way I would EVER allow a parent to INTENTIONALLY expose other children in care, as ell as my own family to contagious illnesses (except for a cold)
does that include things like fever etc? I know from my own experience in the dc world that not all parents take their kids to doctors for fevers, vomiting etc. I have seen many providers say "TERMINATE!". I was just curious as to where you (and of course others) draw that fine line.
Yes I realize that something like a pink eye issue yes of course that needs medical attention. However I can lose count over the number of years that the ignorant parents would say oh its just a cold in the eye or its allergies etc. Of course my response would always be I am not a doctor and its just better to be safe than sorry. Of course it was ALWAYS pink eye.
Crystal 05:26 PM 03-23-2010
I only require it IF I send a child home AND tell them that they need to see a doctor. For a fever, I wouldn't require that, unless it came with sore throat, etc and might be strep. Standard for fever is just 24 hours fever free without medicine.
I started this policy after my first year because I had a parent bring her child with what was a clear case of ringworm. She lied to me and said it was exzema. When dad picked up, I told him that it really looked like ringworm to me and he stated that they knew that, his Moms cat had it and they hadn't had a chance to go to the doctor yet. I terminated on the spot. I did end up with several children contracting ringworm too, and I knew I should have trusted my own judgment and not let them come until they had been treated. That is the ONLY time I have ever had to terminate, for any reason. I added it to my policies that doing such a thing WOULD result in immediate termination and I have never had an issue since. Of course, I have also been very fortunate have wonderful families for the past 12 years.
I started this policy after my first year because I had a parent bring her child with what was a clear case of ringworm. She lied to me and said it was exzema. When dad picked up, I told him that it really looked like ringworm to me and he stated that they knew that, his Moms cat had it and they hadn't had a chance to go to the doctor yet. I terminated on the spot. I did end up with several children contracting ringworm too, and I knew I should have trusted my own judgment and not let them come until they had been treated. That is the ONLY time I have ever had to terminate, for any reason. I added it to my policies that doing such a thing WOULD result in immediate termination and I have never had an issue since. Of course, I have also been very fortunate have wonderful families for the past 12 years.
My4SunshineGirlsNY 06:15 PM 03-23-2010
I can add my advice on the difficult behavior part....I had 2 families that had difficult children...one family last summer that I FINALLY terminated in early Oct. and one boy that I terminated in January. My daycare has been MUCH more stress free without those extreeme difficult ones (aside from the normal annoyances that comes along with being a provider from time to time).
I kept telling myself that I could try harder and if I terminated them I failed....I'm a provider and I am supposed to be able to handle hard behavior. WRONG...I realized it was NOT me..both families were kicked out of other daycares so that should have been a rad flag for me.
Things have been a TON better now that they are gone....so for your own sake, you might want to really consider terminating...sometimes the mix of kids just isn't a good match...the other daycare kids are suffering due to those 2 demanding so much attention...I have been there!!!
I kept telling myself that I could try harder and if I terminated them I failed....I'm a provider and I am supposed to be able to handle hard behavior. WRONG...I realized it was NOT me..both families were kicked out of other daycares so that should have been a rad flag for me.
Things have been a TON better now that they are gone....so for your own sake, you might want to really consider terminating...sometimes the mix of kids just isn't a good match...the other daycare kids are suffering due to those 2 demanding so much attention...I have been there!!!
MarinaVanessa 06:55 AM 03-24-2010
Originally Posted by Crystal:
One of my policies: if your child is sent home from care due to illness that requires medical attention, they cannot return without a doctor's note that states the medical condition, and WHEN they can return to care.
This is exactly what I do. I don't just want a note that says they've been to the doctor. I want a note tha says that they've been cleared to return back to daycare and are no longer contagious.One of my policies: if your child is sent home from care due to illness that requires medical attention, they cannot return without a doctor's note that states the medical condition, and WHEN they can return to care.
misol 07:25 AM 03-24-2010
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
This is exactly what I do. I don't just want a note that says they've been to the doctor. I want a note tha says that they've been cleared to return back to daycare and are no longer contagious.
I think that I am going to change my policy to say this as well.This is exactly what I do. I don't just want a note that says they've been to the doctor. I want a note tha says that they've been cleared to return back to daycare and are no longer contagious.