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Parents and Guardians Forum>Is It Too Much to Ask
lovemykidstoo 05:56 AM 10-29-2012
I have a dcb that is 18 months old. He typically gets up at 6:15 and comes here at 8:00. When he comes, he is a train wreck. The mom or dad usually brings him in and says that he's tired and needs to lay down right away. He sleeps 11-12 hours a night. I think the problem is that they don't serve him breakfast. I ask them everyday if he's eaten and they say that he had a snack. They give him those Gerber bites that are for like 10 month olds and that's it. They told me that he will be eating breakfast at my house. I told the dcd this morning that I think that he's upset and a mess when he gets here because he's hungry. He has been up an hour and a half and has not eating anythiing substantial. Is it really so hard to feed your child a bowl of cereal when they're up that long in the morning? Not to mention neither the parents were going to work this morning.
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Heidi 07:37 AM 10-29-2012
What is your snack/meal schedule?

I don't serve breakfast until 9, because all my kids do get something at home, and then won't eat before that. Plus, they can't wait for lunch if I serve them earlier.

I would give them a copy of your schedule and reiterate that he needs to eat something decent before he comes to daycare. Add a banana and milk to the bites, and that's more like it.
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lovemykidstoo 07:56 AM 10-29-2012
I serve breakfast from 7:45-8:15, snack from 10-10:15 and lunch from 11:45-12:45. It's not necessarily that I miind feeding him breakfast, it's that he's so emotional when he comes and their answer is that he needs to go to bed. He's not tired, he's hungry. Their answer to everything is to put him to bed. Then when he wants to eat breakfast the other kids are coming in the door and they all eat at home, but of course they see him eating, then they all want breakfast. So now it's an hour long affair because they come like 15 minutes apart. So, instead of just feeding 1, I'm feeding 6 with 5 of them already eaten at home.
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Lilbutterflie 07:57 AM 10-29-2012
I don't know if there is really much you can do since you've already mentioned your concern that he needs to eat prior to coming. Since you just mentioned it this morning, I would give it a week to see if DCD starts offering something more than a small snack. If not:

A couple options are:
1- Changing your policy to say that all children arriving at 8:00 or after need to have breakfast at home. This might backfire on you- they could ask to start bringing him earlier or asking for a discount since you would not be offering him breakfast.

2- When he arrives in a "train wreck" state; comment in front of DCD something like "I know you are super hungry, lets go have breakfast."
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lovemykidstoo 08:11 AM 10-29-2012
Originally Posted by Lilbutterflie:
I don't know if there is really much you can do since you've already mentioned your concern that he needs to eat prior to coming. Since you just mentioned it this morning, I would give it a week to see if DCD starts offering something more than a small snack. If not:

A couple options are:
1- Changing your policy to say that all children arriving at 8:00 or after need to have breakfast at home. This might backfire on you- they could ask to start bringing him earlier or asking for a discount since you would not be offering him breakfast.

2- When he arrives in a "train wreck" state; comment in front of DCD something like "I know you are super hungry, lets go have breakfast."
Those are excellent suggestions. The problem is, I've pretty much already done that. I've said several times oh you're just hungry, let's feed you right away. Oh he's been up since 6:15 and hasn't eaten yet, lets go now etc. DCD and DCM just stand there duh! I am afraid that if I say that breakfast is over by 8:00 they'll do just what you said and want to bring him earlier.
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Lilbutterflie 08:34 AM 10-29-2012
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
Those are excellent suggestions. The problem is, I've pretty much already done that. I've said several times oh you're just hungry, let's feed you right away. Oh he's been up since 6:15 and hasn't eaten yet, lets go now etc. DCD and DCM just stand there duh! I am afraid that if I say that breakfast is over by 8:00 they'll do just what you said and want to bring him earlier.
Well, money always talks. If they ask to start bringing him earlier, give them an extra fee for the early arrival.

OR you could stop offering breakfast all together! Maybe if you feel guilty about discontinuing breakfast, you could offer a $5/wk decrease in their tuition. I'm sure you'll save much more than that by not offering it.
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daycarediva 10:03 AM 10-29-2012
I had to change my policies to specify that if your contracted time is after 8, breakfast will NOT be served. I will NOT change contracted times just to accomodate a lazy parent either. I serve breakfast at 7:30. If you come at 8, we are cleaning up. Same with lunch and PM snack. All of my parents are aware of this and work around it.
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lovemykidstoo 10:10 AM 10-29-2012
So if I'm having him eat breakfast at 8:00 and another child walks in at 8:10 and has already eaten at home, but sees the food and starts behaving like they want to eat too (IE starting to get in his chair) and the parents are standing right there, what do you do? I had 2 parents this morning that their child did this and they both said, "well, johnny didn't eat real good this morning, he might want a little something). UGH! Here I almost had dck#1 done and now I have 2 more. If I wouldn't have been feeding dck#1, then they wouldn't have thought about it.
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daycarediva 10:26 AM 10-29-2012
I would tell this to his parents. Flat out say that he needs to have a GOOD breakfast before coming in. That you tried laying him down, but he isn't tired, he is hungry and it is disrupting your schedule to feed him.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:49 AM 10-29-2012
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
So if I'm having him eat breakfast at 8:00 and another child walks in at 8:10 and has already eaten at home, but sees the food and starts behaving like they want to eat too (IE starting to get in his chair) and the parents are standing right there, what do you do? I had 2 parents this morning that their child did this and they both said, "well, johnny didn't eat real good this morning, he might want a little something). UGH! Here I almost had dck#1 done and now I have 2 more. If I wouldn't have been feeding dck#1, then they wouldn't have thought about it.
We start breakfast at 8:00. If a child comes after 8:10, they do not get served breakfast here. It interrupts the flow of our morning too much for me to be running back and forth bringing out breakfast for late children. The children that come in at 8:11 and see others eating at told to please get a puzzle (just like the other children do when they are finished eating). We have never had an issue. If a parent made a comment I would let them know that it was in the parent handbook that breakfast starts at 8:00 and I only serve it until 8:10. The children have until 8:20 to finish eating, and some of them need it. Some children take 5 minutes to eat, and some of mine take 20 minutes! We leave for recess at 8:35 (we put on coats, gloves, hats, etc. BEFORE that point).
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MarinaVanessa 11:00 AM 10-29-2012
Does he wake by himself or do they wake him up? If he's being woken up then I don't see why they just don't let him sleep in longer. Of course if he wakes up on his own I don't see why they don't just feed him cereal like you said or even a warm bowl of instant oatmeal. Warm it up, throw some sliced bananas, blueberries or strawberries in, sit him in his high chair and get back to getting ready for work.

My son wakes up at 6:30 in the morning and theres no way that he would let me get away with not waking up too to get him something to eat. That is unless I turn the TV on ... so chances are that you don't have TV going in your daycare and they probably do at home so by the time they get to DC he doesn't have something to distract him from the fact that he's hungry.
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Blackcat31 12:06 PM 10-29-2012
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
So if I'm having him eat breakfast at 8:00 and another child walks in at 8:10 and has already eaten at home, but sees the food and starts behaving like they want to eat too (IE starting to get in his chair) and the parents are standing right there, what do you do? I had 2 parents this morning that their child did this and they both said, "well, johnny didn't eat real good this morning, he might want a little something). UGH! Here I almost had dck#1 done and now I have 2 more. If I wouldn't have been feeding dck#1, then they wouldn't have thought about it.
This is the EXACT reason I do not offer breakfast any more.

I do a morning snack at 9:15. Too many times I have fed a child and another one comes in and wants to eat too even though they have already eaten at home.

I require ALL my parents to feed their child something BEFORE arrival. Put a stop to the above problem immediately.

It's bad enough that most daycare children eat here 3-4 times per day so the least parents can do is feed them breakfast.

I have even had one parent tell me Johnny wouldn't eat breakfast this morning so he is really hungry only to have little Johnny tell me mom had been telling him she is too much in a hurry in the mornings that he can't eat at home and will just have to wait until he gets here if he complains enough Miss C might just give you something.

Yes, I called her out on it and now every morning I ask IN FRONT OF MOM, "What did you have for breakfast this morning Johnny?".

Only once has he replied that mom didn't feed him. Mom then took him out to breakfast and brought him back fed.
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lovemykidstoo 12:47 PM 10-29-2012
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
Does he wake by himself or do they wake him up? If he's being woken up then I don't see why they just don't let him sleep in longer. Of course if he wakes up on his own I don't see why they don't just feed him cereal like you said or even a warm bowl of instant oatmeal. Warm it up, throw some sliced bananas, blueberries or strawberries in, sit him in his high chair and get back to getting ready for work.

My son wakes up at 6:30 in the morning and theres no way that he would let me get away with not waking up too to get him something to eat. That is unless I turn the TV on ... so chances are that you don't have TV going in your daycare and they probably do at home so by the time they get to DC he doesn't have something to distract him from the fact that he's hungry.
He wakes up on his own. He goes to sleep at 7:00 p.m. and wakes up at 6:15 and they tell me the reason he's a mess in the morning is because he's tired. Does not make sense to me for a child that just slept 11 hrs. He is simply hungry. As soon as I feed him, he's fine. It's not my food that bothers me, it's just the idea that they are so lazy not to feed the poor kid. These are the same people that are so excited that he goes to bed at 7:00 after getting home with him from here at 5:20.

BC, I'm with ya. This might be something I switch here. It's a bunch of hooey this lazy family.
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lovemykidstoo 12:49 PM 10-29-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
This is the EXACT reason I do not offer breakfast any more.

I do a morning snack at 9:15. Too many times I have fed a child and another one comes in and wants to eat too even though they have already eaten at home.

I require ALL my parents to feed their child something BEFORE arrival. Put a stop to the above problem immediately.

It's bad enough that most daycare children eat here 3-4 times per day so the least parents can do is feed them breakfast.

I have even had one parent tell me Johnny wouldn't eat breakfast this morning so he is really hungry only to have little Johnny tell me mom had been telling him she is too much in a hurry in the mornings that he can't eat at home and will just have to wait until he gets here if he complains enough Miss C might just give you something.

Yes, I called her out on it and now every morning I ask IN FRONT OF MOM, "What did you have for breakfast this morning Johnny?".

Only once has he replied that mom didn't feed him. Mom then took him out to breakfast and brought him back fed.
Wow, that is so cool that you busted her LOL!! My son was in daycare for the first 3 years of his life and I never sent him without breakfast. That was our time together in the morning before I had to go to work and not see him all day. Such a shame that it's such an inconvenience for some people.
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Unregistered 04:53 PM 10-29-2012
I will honestly say I never fed my kids breakfast before taking them to daycare, but they got up at 6:30, I dropped them off by 7:30 and I picked up by 3, usually 2:45. If they had more wake time before going to daycare, you better believe I would've made them breakfast first. My kids always were ready to eat within the first 30 minutes of being awake.
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