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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Violent 3 Year Old
busymommy0420 07:10 PM 10-24-2012
I have an almost 3yo DCG who has a violent streak. I have watched her pinch, hit and pull hair with a straight face staring at the child she is hurting watching them cry. I immediately get up, stop her place her in time out and then have her apologize. This behavior is daily, once or twice a day. It seems to be triggered if I am helping another child, feeding the baby or preparing lunch. I assume it is for attention but it BOTHERS me so much that she has no emotion behind her eyes when she is doing it. It seems like it doesn't bother her that she is hurting someone. She comes from a nice family. Am I making to much out of this?
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AllDeezBabies 07:22 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by busymommy0420:
I have an almost 3yo DCG who has a violent streak. I have watched her pinch, hit and pull hair with a straight face staring at the child she is hurting watching them cry. I immediately get up, stop her place her in time out and then have her apologize. This behavior is daily, once or twice a day. It seems to be triggered if I am helping another child, feeding the baby or preparing lunch. I assume it is for attention but it BOTHERS me so much that she has no emotion behind her eyes when she is doing it. It seems like it doesn't bother her that she is hurting someone. She comes from a nice family. Am I making to much out of this?
I don't care if the child has the look of love when she abuses other children, violence is violence and I don't tolerate it. Have you talked to the parents? I would hate for you to have the parent of the child being hit come to you because DCG left marks. That would put you in a very awkward position.

In my location, it is very hard to get clients but I'll be darned if I put myself or other daycare children in harms way because I'm trying to save face with an abusive baby all for filling a spot. <---I say this with the best intentions.
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busymommy0420 07:42 PM 10-24-2012
Thanks. I have NEVER had trouble getting clients. She can be so sweet, loving and kind too. I just don't want to give up on her. The parents of the "victims" are aware. I am very open with my parents I work with. They understand and are not mad at me or the child. I just want to help her.
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countrymom 06:11 AM 10-25-2012
I had one like this. I tried and help, but the day he started giving the other kids nightmares at night, I knew I had to do something. Oh the fact that he convinced the kids to sneak out of my house while I was in the br, didn't help either.
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Willow 07:49 AM 10-25-2012
I don't think you're making too much out of it. I would be completely freaked out by a child who shows no compassion or empathy either!!!

At almost 3 she is perfectly capable of understanding:

"DCG, because you keep hurting others while I am busy ___making lunch, feeding baby, helping another child___ you now need to play on the floor right next time me, away from the other kids, until you learn to be nicer to other children. We do not hit, pinch or pull hair in my house...EVER. Do you understand?"

Then follow through.

Slowly allow her more freedom after a time and praise her if she is able to remain kind.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:11 AM 10-25-2012
How odd! I just posted about an almost 3-year-old as well. Issues abound it seems.

I attempt the keeping them close by or having them work on an alternate activity, but my issue is that when they resume playing with the children the streak comes right back. It seems like your DCK is acting out to get attention when yours is elsewhere.
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Tags:3 year old, violent child
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