Need some advice. I have a family who I've had 3 years now. We have extended them quite a bit of grace (bounced checks, late payments, etc.) and even went above and beyond for them and agreed to take their child at 6:30a when everyone else comes at 7:30a due to them being in a tough work spot. The early drop off has been going on about 4 months now. They mentioned it would just be temporary but seems as if they don't have a plan to change it.

Fast forward to the Friday before Christmas. #1 I had to remind them about payment and #2 they "gifted" me an extra $10 with their payment. No Christmas card or anything else.

So today I grew a backbone and emailed her about their plans for drop off as I thought it was supposed to be temporary and she said she'd rather talk on the phone and is calling later today.

So here's my question I feel like we've gone out of our way for this family and the $10 at Christmas was the straw that broke the camel's back because it felt way more insulting than if they had given nothing.

When we talk today and I try and put my foot down about getting her back on the regular drop off time (or seeking alternate care) do I mention feeling unappreciated by the $10 gift or do I let it go? I don't want to be ungrateful but come on it's almost a slap in the face IMO and it makes me feel like they are taking advantage of me. What do you think?

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No, do not mention the $10! They are only doing what you allow them to do, decide what you are willing to do and stick with it. How much extra are they paying for the early drop off? Attach a hefty fee for it or tell them you are no longer opening that early.

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Honestly, I'd let the $10 issue go...it's better than nothing and it makes you sound petty although I get why it bugs you.

I would simply either start charging them for the extra time, late payments, bounced checks, etc as they happen. They can only take advantage of you if you let them. I have learned the hard way that when you give special treatment, they expect special treatment so it isn't special to them anymore...meanwhile, you grow resentful and they just continue taking the special treatment until you attach a price tag to it.

So, tell them that you reevaluated your business needs and you now charge $XX.XX for the early drop off. If you really don't want to offer the early drop off anymore, simply say it isn't working out so you'll have to go back to the normal off time starting on January XYZ date. Otherwise they'll continue taking the freebie drop off time and you'll continue getting more and more burnt out. Been there, done that.

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No, definitely don't mention it. Dcf's don't have to give you anything. Christmas presents should not be expected. Not to mention you never know what a families financial situation is, even when it may appear to be good.

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I agree. I wouldn't mention the $10 but I would definitely tell the family you are no longer willing to do the early drop off as it was suppose to be temporary and it does not appear to be that way as it's gone on for 4 months now. That's not temporary in my book.

I would just tighten up the reins and start having them stick to the rules/policies. Late fees for late payments, cash only since their check(s) were NSF and stop doing early drop offs ...unless you are willing to continue...and in that case, I'd require a hefty fee for your time.

IME, families that don't appreciate you won't "get" your point anyways if you address it. They are simply too self-absorbed. If they truly appreciated the above and beyond you have provided they would show it in their actions (and sometimes in their generosity) but most times....it's just families being too self-absorbed to care, notice and/or change.

I'm sorry you are dealing with such a sucky situation.

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I would not mention the $10.00. I would put your foot down about the early drop off thing though or attach a hefty fee for it.
Deb

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