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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Should I take a neighbors child?
momof3 08:05 AM 05-18-2009
I have a neighbor who lives right next door. She has twin 3 1/2 year olds. I have always had a policy of "no friends, no neighbors, no relatives". I was told this by a trainer who had done childcare for 20 years, and she had adopted this policy, and said this was the best advise she can give anyone doing childcare. She has called me at least 6 different times over the past year asking me to watch the kids, I have always come up with an excuse, like I only have one opening, etc. I now have my vacancy sign up, and she has called again. Here's the problem...I am losing 2 kids in four weeks, their dad just got fired from work, so I will need the income. Should I turn her down again, and just wait it out to get someone new. I just feel like I will have no time away from my job, if I watch a neighbors kids. We don't have fences and I don't want the kids coming over when I am not being paid for it. She only needs 3 days a week, and I am afraid she will send them over when the other children are in the yard. Also, last year, she showed up at my door with the kids in tow at 4:00 (I close at 5:00) asking if I can watch them while she ran to the store (over 45 minutes away). When I told her no that I was at my limit of children and they won't be gone till 5:00, she told me "oh, that would work, I can drop them off at 5 and still get my things done." By the way, she was not working at this time. I still told her no, that I had errands to run once all the kids were gone. (then I felt that I had to leave my house at 5, to prove I had errands to run). I thought it was very pushy of her to ask me to watch her 2 twins, after working 10 hours watching children, she wanted me to help her out so she could go shopping. My kids are 8,10,12....so it's not like they are friends. I guess I am answering my own questions here...but just wanted others opinions.
Thanks.
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Unregistered 10:24 AM 05-18-2009
I wouldn't take your neighbor's kids. From what you said, it sounds like she might try to take advantage of you if you do take them. I would tell her flat out that your policy is no family, no friends, no neighbors and just explain that you don't like to mix business with pleasure. I watch my friend's two children and it has worked out nicely because I have a contract and stick to it. However, there are times when we get together with the kids and I don't really want to b/c I've had my "fill" of her kids and just need a break. I feel bad about that, but I remind myself that I'm only human and she'd probably feel the same way if it was reverse. If you take your neighbor's kids, I'm sure you'll end up feeling the same way. If you say no, just stick with it, even if she keeps pushing.
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Unregistered 10:42 AM 05-18-2009
I also have a policy of "no friends, relatives or neighbors." I usually tell the neighbors, family, etc. that right away when they start to ask if I have openings. I say that I have tried it in the past (which I have) and it usually ends in an uncomfortable situation. Even though you might be struggling, I would definitely not take her children. I would just tell her next time she asks about the opening that you have implemented a NEW policy that states this and won't be able to take her children. She may be mad, but at least you wont have to be leaving your house to pretend to go somewhere.

Good Luck
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Unregistered 04:38 AM 05-19-2009
Nooooooooo! You'll kick yourself later.
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lilbiddapopcorn 09:54 PM 05-19-2009
I agree with the above posts. Sounds like she's already trying to take advantage of you and she's not even a client yet! Imagine if she were...it would only get worse. I say stick to your guns. She's probably thinking of you as more of a convenient next door babysitter that she can unload her children on, not as a professional child care provider. I say stop making excuses to her, because eventually you'll run out of them. Just tell her upfront that you're uncomfortable caring for the children of friends, neighbors, or relatives. And if I were you i'd phrase it just that way "friends, neighbors, or relatives" so she doesn't feel like you've implemented this "new policy" just to avoid caring for her children.

Good luck
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pplsearch 02:47 PM 06-01-2009
Originally Posted by lilbiddapopcorn:
I agree with the above posts. Sounds like she's already trying to take advantage of you and she's not even a client yet! Imagine if she were...it would only get worse. I say stick to your guns. She's probably thinking of you as more of a convenient next door babysitter that she can unload her children on, not as a professional child care provider. I say stop making excuses to her, because eventually you'll run out of them.
Yeah, I agree with this advice.

Your neighbor sounds pretty headstrong, and persistent with her requests. It's unlikely she'll get the subtle "message" and stop asking you about it. So it'd save you time if you just tell her the real reason why. And you can go about in a nice way, too. It doesn't have to come off as being confrontational.

You can pitch it as a new policy -- for friends, relatives, and neighbors -- because technically, it is a new thing for you to let people know about the policy instead of giving them an excuse.
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Unregistered 11:26 AM 06-17-2009
I have cared for friends and relatives before and it has worked out well. I dont cut family breaks or discounts and they have always respected my policies. I think I am pretty up front with them as far as what I expect. It can often be a blessing for friends and relatives to have someone they trust who is a childcare provider. But you know your family and should use good judgement. Neighbors are a little trickier. They are so close and there is no escaping them. Plus this neighbor is so pushy anyway. Like you said, I think you answered your own question. You should steer clear of the pushy neighbor mom.
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Tags:friends/neighbors/relatives kids - risk
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