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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>What Is Wrong Here??
Hunni Bee 08:53 AM 09-24-2011
I work in a center, and we have an Infant/Young Toddler Room. There's a about 5 kids in there...2 14 or 15-month olds, 2 just-turned-one's, and 7 month old. (At 18 months they go to the Toddler Room).

They all cry ALL DAY LONG.

They are not neglected, the teacher attends to their every need. They are played with all day long, sang songs with. They are fed exactly when they're hungry, allowed to nap when they get tired....If there's more than four present, there's automatically two teachers in there. The same two teachers everyday.

They just are never happy. They all have to be held in order to not cry, so one or two of them is crying at all times. And at 14 and 15 months, they shouldn't need to be held all the time should they?

There's one little girl who is the oldest, but too young (and too immature) to go to the Toddler Room, who goes into what can only be described as a tantrum at the slightest provocation. If she wants to stand on a chair, and is taken down, she will cry for 30+ minutes inconsolably...

Are these all rage babies??
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godiva83 11:39 AM 09-24-2011
What is the classroom like? is it an overwhelming environment, bright colours, music on all the time, mirrors all over, over loaded with toys ect.
sometimes the environment has a huge impact on the behaviour of young children? I would try to stay away from labelling all these babes as 'rage' babies. make sure they have a good attachement at home with their parents and a good attachement with their caregivers in the room, play games, lots of floor time with a care giver near by.
Good Luck,
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Hunni Bee 12:03 PM 09-24-2011
Originally Posted by godiva83:
What is the classroom like? is it an overwhelming environment, bright colours, music on all the time, mirrors all over, over loaded with toys ect.
sometimes the environment has a huge impact on the behaviour of young children? I would try to stay away from labelling all these babes as 'rage' babies. make sure they have a good attachement at home with their parents and a good attachement with their caregivers in the room, play games, lots of floor time with a care giver near by.
Good Luck,
That's the thing. They have all that. They've all had the same caregiver since they started. They won't play with toys or on the floor because they all wanted be held. There is music all day, but its playing softly in the background, the room is painted a mellow color, there's enough toys for them to play with but not too many. There's no PNP's or high chairs for them to be confined to...The 7 month old isn't sitting up or trying to crawl because she screams if she's placed anywhere but in the swing or on someone's lap.

I didn't mean to say they were rage babies. Its just that their crying is becoming concerning and we can't find the reason for it, except that they want to be held constantly
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kendallina 12:15 PM 09-24-2011
I wish I had suggestions for you. I have only worked in one young toddler room and it was long, long ago (before I had a clue what I was doing).

But, I did want to say that there have been a few research studies that have looked at the brains cortisol (stress) levels of children in childcare. And it seems that toddlers have the highest cortisol levels while in group care. So, it is a stressful time for the little ones to be in group care. I know that doesn't help at all but it might ease the stress you are feeling about how your young toddlers are acting.

Are there any days/times when it's not like that? Is there anything different going on at those times? What tends to set the children off? It may be worth it to do some sitting back and observing (if possible) and try to get at the cause of the crying (i.e. does one kid crying set everyone off? Are they crying more when there is more stimulation happening? Does it happen more right beforand I wish I could help some, but knowing that e lunch? etc.) Answering these questions now might seem easy, but I would suggest that you really observe (even make notes if you have to) to try and see if there are some patterns happening that you could change.

That's all I've got...
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nannyde 12:42 PM 09-24-2011
It sounds like the adults need to completely back off of these babies and have them go play. Quit the holding, walking, rocking and playing with them. They need to meet their care needs of providing diaper changes, feeding, and supervision but they need to back off of all non care interactions.

It's unnatural for a baby to be played with by an adult constantly. Human babies are designed to have adults CARE for them but they should be self entertaining and playing alongside of each other. The ones that are between twelve and eighteen months should be spending their energy mastering walking, moving their bodies around the room, and playing with toys.

The seven month old needs more direct adult but the walkers need to get off of the adult and get into their environment.

They are crying because they are overwhelmed with WAY WAY WAY too much adult. They need to COMPLETELY stop playing with them. It's making the kids SO unhappy and overwhelmed. They are better off protesting the adults not one to oneing them then they are being one to oned. The protesting is appropriate for their age.... getting the response of having so much adult in their play is what is inappropriate. They are telling them they can't manage THAT adult response.
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kendallina 01:49 PM 09-24-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
It sounds like the adults need to completely back off of these babies and have them go play. Quit the holding, walking, rocking and playing with them. They need to meet their care needs of providing diaper changes, feeding, and supervision but they need to back off of all non care interactions.

It's unnatural for a baby to be played with by an adult constantly. Human babies are designed to have adults CARE for them but they should be self entertaining and playing alongside of each other. The ones that are between twelve and eighteen months should be spending their energy mastering walking, moving their bodies around the room, and playing with toys.

The seven month old needs more direct adult but the walkers need to get off of the adult and get into their environment.

They are crying because they are overwhelmed with WAY WAY WAY too much adult. They need to COMPLETELY stop playing with them. It's making the kids SO unhappy and overwhelmed. They are better off protesting the adults not one to oneing them then they are being one to oned. The protesting is appropriate for their age.... getting the response of having so much adult in their play is what is inappropriate. They are telling them they can't manage THAT adult response.

I understand what you're saying in regards to adults should not be playing with children constantly, but it sounds like you are suggesting that the adults do not show affection for these kids? I'm genuinely curious, is this what you're saying? Because children need affection, comfort (at certain times) and love from adults.
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cheerfuldom 01:51 PM 09-24-2011
I understand what the teachers are trying to do but taking turns constantly providing walking, soothing, bouncing type attention turns that into a competition so that the loudest and unhappiest baby gets the "reward". I have a very young group as well (5 month old, 10 month old, 12 month, 13 month plus 3 older kids!) and I find that the less I entertain, etc. the babies, the better off they are. This includes my own infant! I feed, change, nap each child and besides that, they are on their own to crawl and play. I do not carry around anyone that can walk (I do that with my own kids too) and so there is no competition for the "hold-me, hold-me, hold-me" kids. Nobody gets that so nobody expects that. My own three children are quite independent and generally, early on physical milestones. I do read with them, play with them, etc at times but never when they are screaming and demanding for it. Its amazing how different kids can be when you decide for them whats best instead of leaving them to test and push and figure things out for themselves. Please try a hands off method for at least a week and see what progress you might get. It doesn't sound like it can get much worse there anywhere. Let them go to each other for playmates instead of competing for the teachers attention, especially the ones over 1 year old. Start prepping them for the toddler room where I would imagine the ratio of kids is a lot higher and more than likely, a lot less crying in that room where they have to get used to the environment and one-on-one attention is not an option. Your teachers can still be loving and nurturing without being physically doing something for each kid at all times. sometimes the best thing you can do is step back and not do anything. I would also not let the older ones in a swing at all and no lap time for anyone that is crying and demanding for it. Start rewarding those that are calmest and happiest!
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cheerfuldom 02:00 PM 09-24-2011
Just saw the PP right now.....affection comes from their parents. The first priority for a daycare provider is to make sure all the children have their basic needs met and I think that a calm environment is one of those basic needs. They need that more than a hug because their parents can give lots of hugs and physical affection at home but only the provider can change the daycare environment. Its up to the daycare provider to get this crying issue solved and then add in comfort and affection as the kids can handle it. Right now, they are receiving lots of physical attention but are obviously still not happy. You can be loving and nurturing without physically carrying and consoling a child at all times, wouldn't you agree? Isn't it loving and nurturing to say "I am the adult, I know what is best and what will truly make these kids happy"?
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Hunni Bee 02:07 PM 09-24-2011
Thank you so much. I never thought they were getting too much adult interaction. We've always had an Infant Room, and they were for the most part a happy lot. And come to think of it, there wasn't as much holding and carrying around as there is now. They just played in the floor.

These guys seem not to know what "play in floor" is all about. And while these kids are loved and attended to at home, there isn't much "go play". They all have older sisters, cousins, aunts, etc in the house...so there's always someone to hold them, one-on-one play, rock them to sleep, etc.

I'll talk it over with my director. Thanks again.
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kendallina 02:12 PM 09-24-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
Just saw the PP right now.....affection comes from their parents. The first priority for a daycare provider is to make sure all the children have their basic needs met and I think that a calm environment is one of those basic needs. They need that more than a hug because their parents can give lots of hugs and physical affection at home but only the provider can change the daycare environment. Its up to the daycare provider to get this crying issue solved and then add in comfort and affection as the kids can handle it. Right now, they are receiving lots of physical attention but are obviously still not happy. You can be loving and nurturing without physically carrying and consoling a child at all times, wouldn't you agree? Isn't it loving and nurturing to say "I am the adult, I know what is best and what will truly make these kids happy"?

Affection also needs to come from providers that are caring for children 9 hours/day. I agree that these children may be getting too much attention, but I was responding to nannyde's comment about backing off all non-care interactions. That's all.
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nannyde 04:00 PM 09-24-2011
Originally Posted by kendallina:
I understand what you're saying in regards to adults should not be playing with children constantly, but it sounds like you are suggesting that the adults do not show affection for these kids? I'm genuinely curious, is this what you're saying? Because children need affection, comfort (at certain times) and love from adults.
Nah

I'm not advocating cruelty to little babies and kids.

Of course they need to be affectionate. They can do that without holding, walking, rocking, and playing with them all the time.

Kids that age need a soft voice, kind facial expressions, a quick pat on the back, and a good squeeze the stuffin out of ya hugs, pat on the head, wink and a nod... and then go play.

The seven month old is most likely not crawling yet or holding his own bottle so he would need more physical care and more adult.

The one year olds... they need physical care and supervision but the majority of their up time between naps needs to be free play. They shouldn't be concerned about the adult and require the adults to do what the OP stated in order for them to be happy.

They should LOVE cruising their environment.... be interested in what they can do with toys.... play toys along the floor... defying gravity manage around each other.... etc.

The adults should NOT be one to oneing them moment to moment. When they do that the kids are overwhelmed with artificial and unnatural stimulation. The end result is the babies putting that level of energy back OUT. They do that by the only way they can at that age..... crying and using their bodies to gain more adult.

I would say that for every sixty minutes of free time (non eating, changing, cleaning kids) that the one year old age group should have about ten minutes of adult total per kid.

The other fifty minutes they should be "doing" toys, each other, and their environment. The adults need to nix the music and any bright lights... stay stationary and redirect them to each other and the toys.. over and over. Give them a good squeeze, soft voice, kiss to the head, pat on the shoulders randomly thru their play but then send them off to do what one year olds are supposed to do.. go play toys.
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kendallina 04:07 PM 09-24-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Nah

I'm not advocating cruelty to little babies and kids.

Of course they need to be affection. They can do that without holding, walking, rocking, and playing with them all the time.

Kids that age need a soft voice, kind facial expressions, a quick pat on the back, and a good squeeze the stuffin out of ya hugs, pat on the head, wink and a nod... and then go play.

The seven month old is most likely not crawling yet or holding his own bottle so he would need more physical care and more adult.

The one year olds... they need physical care and supervision but the majority of their up time between naps needs to be free play. They shouldn't be concerned about the adult and require the adults to do what the OP stated in order for them to be happy.

They should LOVE cruising their environment.... be interested in what they can do with toys.... play toys along the floor... defying gravity manage around each other.... etc.

The adults should NOT be one to oneing them moment to moment. When they do that the kids are overwhelmed with artificial and unnatural stimulation. The end result is the babies putting that level of energy back OUT. They do that by the only way they can at that age..... crying and using their bodies to gain more adult.

I would say that for every sixty minutes of free time (non eating, changing, cleaning kids) that the one year old age group should have about ten minutes of adult total per kid.

The other fifty minutes they should be "doing" toys, each other, and their environment. The adults need to nix the music and any bright lights... stay stationary and redirect them to each other and the toys.. over and over. Give them a good squeeze, soft voice, kiss to the head, pat on the shoulders randomly thru their play but then send them off to do what one year olds are supposed to do.. go play toys.
Thank you for clarifying, Nannyde!
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cheerfuldom 04:59 PM 09-24-2011
my only point is that loving and nurturing care can be provided in more ways than constant attention and constant physical affection as nanny's clarification also said. you just have to get creative so the kiddos know you care through other ways than carrying them around.
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Tags:crying - all day, infants
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