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Old 02-03-2014, 11:06 AM
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Default Parents in the House?

Aside from the issue of parents lingering at pick up and drop off, has anyone had an issue with parents walking through the house? I am uncomfortable with this in general. I've had parents who just walk right into my kitchen (the entry opens into the daycare room so there is no need for them to go anywhere else). Either to throw something away or get a napkin or to say goodbye to their child who has already gone in the living room. At one point I put a gate in the doorway thinking they might get the point, one mom just hopped over it. I have a trash and tissues in the daycare room so I really don't get it, but I do notice with one mom in particular she is looking around and checking things out. Probably just seeing if things are tidy? Not sure but I don't find it necessary and it gets to me. Should I say something? Also she goes into the bathroom and that gets to me too, she's not using the bathroom, weird. Most parents stay right by the door where the cubbies are.
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Old 02-03-2014, 11:41 AM
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I should add, I don't have anything to hide and my house is clean. Just feels like an invasion of privacy, maybe it's just me
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Old 02-03-2014, 11:44 AM
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Originally Posted by Lauram16 View Post
Aside from the issue of parents lingering at pick up and drop off, has anyone had an issue with parents walking through the house? I am uncomfortable with this in general. I've had parents who just walk right into my kitchen (the entry opens into the daycare room so there is no need for them to go anywhere else). Either to throw something away or get a napkin or to say goodbye to their child who has already gone in the living room. At one point I put a gate in the doorway thinking they might get the point, one mom just hopped over it. I have a trash and tissues in the daycare room so I really don't get it, but I do notice with one mom in particular she is looking around and checking things out. Probably just seeing if things are tidy? Not sure but I don't find it necessary and it gets to me. Should I say something? Also she goes into the bathroom and that gets to me too, she's not using the bathroom, weird. Most parents stay right by the door where the cubbies are.
This gets on my nerves as well. I have a grandma that I feel is eye-ing EVERYTHING. She has picked up the children, though for 4 years now so I guess that is just her personality. BUT is sure can be annoying!
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Old 02-03-2014, 11:56 AM
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It would bother me too unless we were friends who hung out on the weekends.
Thankfully I dont have to worry about it. My parents come down the side yard right into the daycare room. There are tall gates blocking their access to any other room (most parents cant figure out the gates anyway )
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Old 02-03-2014, 12:14 PM
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When a new kids starts I stand at the limit of where the parent can go. So if I don't want them past the living room, then I don't go past the living room while they are there. Works very well. But I do have one dcd who hangs out an uncomfortably long time if dbf isn't here. And would walk through the house letting his daughter show him around. One day I had had enough and just said dcg I think daddy wants to stay by the door today so you can get home to play. Dcd got a weird look on his face but from then on, he stays by the door
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Old 02-03-2014, 12:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauram16 View Post
Aside from the issue of parents lingering at pick up and drop off, has anyone had an issue with parents walking through the house? I am uncomfortable with this in general. I've had parents who just walk right into my kitchen (the entry opens into the daycare room so there is no need for them to go anywhere else). Either to throw something away or get a napkin or to say goodbye to their child who has already gone in the living room. At one point I put a gate in the doorway thinking they might get the point, one mom just hopped over it. I have a trash and tissues in the daycare room so I really don't get it, but I do notice with one mom in particular she is looking around and checking things out. Probably just seeing if things are tidy? Not sure but I don't find it necessary and it gets to me. Should I say something? Also she goes into the bathroom and that gets to me too, she's not using the bathroom, weird. Most parents stay right by the door where the cubbies are.
That would bother me too. I have to think a bit on how to handle it.

Laurel

Last edited by Blackcat31; 02-03-2014 at 12:34 PM.
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Old 02-03-2014, 12:21 PM
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I live away from my DC but have an apartment upstairs. I had parents ask if they can go take a look at it. (I think that's just weird!) I just smile & reply, "Sure.., right after I go snooping around your home!"
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Old 02-03-2014, 12:29 PM
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I have had a mom come in to the kitchen to wash her kid's hands in the sink before dropping the kid off because she had gunk on them. I had another mom ask to use my bathroom because she had just been in the car for an hour. I was totally fine with that. I would be fine with the parents going into any of the main living areas (living room, playroom, eating area, kitchen) without asking. No one does, though, because from my front doorway you can see all of these areas. The majority of my parents don't leave the entryway rug.

If someone tried to go into a non-daycare area, I would be so weirded out.
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Old 02-03-2014, 12:33 PM
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I don't think I would have an issue with parents going into places like my kitchen or bathroom, but if they did it creepily or in a nosy way I'd be upset. I totally get why parents would want to see rooms that dc kids have access to (in my case it's my entire main floor).
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  #10  
Old 02-03-2014, 12:41 PM
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Smile Maybe a short reminder note to parents like this:

Dear Parents

Working from my home allows me to maintain the family environment that many of you have looked for when choosing child care arrangements.
At the same time working from my house can blur the boundaries as to what parts of my home are and aren't available to clients.

In recent weeks, I have had several parents who have made their way through my home during drop offs/pick ups and while this may not seem like a big deal, it can feel a bit overwhelming and somewhat intrusive.

As of today, I would like to ask that all parents please remain in the entryway of my home and I will either greet you and take your child from there or will bring your child to you at the end of the day.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me and thank you for your consideration in this matter.

Sincerely

Provider
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Old 02-03-2014, 01:16 PM
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I have one parent that does this. It really bothers me. I feel like he is snooping around...wonders from our den to our l.r. while I get baby ready to go. (he was getting her ready but, he is TOO SLOW!). He looks behind our end tables, etc. We have a steel door with a window at the top and he was looking out the window but, down in a way..Like he was looking at the place where the window connects to door. If that makes any sense. Point is it creeps me out when he wanders around my home. Especially when no one else does.
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Old 02-03-2014, 01:19 PM
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This makes me kinda glad my Dc area is in the main part of the house. There's no reason for anyone to go down my hall but to use the restroom and only one mom ever asks and that's after an hour plus commute. And I know she's not snooping, there's really nothing to snoop in there! LOL all other doors remain shut during daycare so it would be really weird for them to get back there. Haha!
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Old 02-03-2014, 06:39 PM
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So are parents going in parts of your home that children are not allowed or are these areas that children spend time in? If my child was in a provider's home all day, I would be uncomfortable if I were not allowed in those same areas.

Don't get me wrong, I understand the intrusiveness of it and I cringe when a parent walks all the way in and it's not as clean as I would like. But, they are entrusting their children with us, I cannot understand that they would not be allowed to see the space (daily) that their children are in.
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Old 02-03-2014, 07:50 PM
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The only time it bothered me that a parent came in isiwhen she offered to change her child's diapersince he had pooped right at pickups. She changed it, then washed her hands in the kitchen (yuck). I ran right over and sanitized it and everything. Every other time the parents have stayed by the entrance.
Deb
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Old 02-03-2014, 09:56 PM
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Yes it is area where the children are sometimes. And I understand, I don't want to make parents feel like they CANT come through the house if they need to. That's why I haven't said anything because parents gave the right to see where there kids are during the day. The part I don't like is that it seems to be for no reason. It's one mom in particular and she's looking around and stuff. Some things raise a red flag for me.
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Old 02-03-2014, 10:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauram16 View Post
Yes it is area where the children are sometimes. And I understand, I don't want to make parents feel like they CANT come through the house if they need to. That's why I haven't said anything because parents gave the right to see where there kids are during the day. The part I don't like is that it seems to be for no reason. It's one mom in particular and she's looking around and stuff. Some things raise a red flag for me.
why not just be straight out honest with her. next time you see her looking around for something, You can say...."Can I help you find something?" I had a DCD that did this. Drove me bonkers.

I basically told the DCD sorry, but it's hard when you linger and come further into the house. All of the kids are set off by it and makes it hard for me to control the group.

Next time you see she wants over the gate, say, Can I help you with something? Oh you have trash, no worries heres a can right here. start making her feel out of line and she will stop.

When this was happening to me I felt sooooooooo frustrated and bothered by it. I almost felt like saying to their face, if you don't trust me, then please by all means pack up your kid and go. I never got there with the family Ihad, but I so bad just wanted to say that so many times.............
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Old 02-04-2014, 08:28 AM
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I have had a few clients linger.... and talk for 1/2 hour or more.... does make it hard on you while you are trying to provide for their child and others.....

I have a client now that let me know that she has a friend out of town that does home care as well, she said that this friend had a client pick up one day and they ended up stealing from her... my client said that they took this ladies wallet and some other small stuff...

So for me it makes me wonder that if they do this to case out the place to see what kind of things you have just laying around that may be easy access to take.... ( I would hope clients do not stup that low but you never now )

I had one myself that wondered further into my house ( areas that children don't go and are away from the entrance to daycare ) I told her not to for it was off limits and that my husband was sleeping right up stairs .... she blamed it on her little one, but has not done it since .... ( clients come in side door to cubbies / laundry room then through a inner door right to the basement door which is bout 3 steps to the left ) no need to go any further into my home, so when they do it does not make any sense what so ever and I would be concerned .... how ever if they asked to see the rest then I would take them through, which should not happen for I do that with every interview anyway...

good luck .....
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Old 02-04-2014, 10:09 AM
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Cool parents walking in house

Could not remember my log in information locked out

Although this does not bother me, it bothers my other half. There is a very valid reason for privacy. I feel parents should feel welcome but at what cost. It can be quite aggravating when a parent is roaming around especially one that is naturally curious (nosey) and asks questions about everything. I have had parents wash things (pacifiers). Parents use the bathroom. I like the idea of a letter, but I feel if I give it to them it is saying to them, I have something to hide. I am a private person but was raised in an open household were people just walked in and said hello (sort of no boundaries) . I like having boundaries now that I am older after all I can barely keep the bathroom door shut because the kids barge in and bang the door open.
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Old 02-04-2014, 10:48 AM
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My son has been going to the same school building for ten years. He started when he was three. They allowed parents to come into his prek room for about six weeks until they stopped it because the parents were a disruption.

Since then I have never been allowed to walk around his school. Just because you have a kid in a building doesn't mean you get to go anywhere in the building. I don't allow parents past the front door. They see the house three times before they start so they know the area. I don't want to interview over and over and over again.
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Old 02-04-2014, 10:53 AM
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Could not remember my log in information locked out
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I sent you a password reset email
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  #21  
Old 02-04-2014, 11:13 AM
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My son has been going to the same school building for ten years. He started when he was three. They allowed parents to come into his prek room for about six weeks until they stopped it because the parents were a disruption.

Since then I have never been allowed to walk around his school. Just because you have a kid in a building doesn't mean you get to go anywhere in the building. I don't allow parents past the front door. They see the house three times before they start so they know the area. I don't want to interview over and over and over again.
I didn't think of it that way and you're right! I am not allowed past the lobby of either of the schools my children attend, unless it's Open House night which is once a year at the beginning of the school year. We are in MA, not too far from CT where all those young children were killed in Sandy Hook Elementary not too long ago. Since then they have cracked down on the rules even more. Parents are not allowed to enter for any reason at all. They make this VERY clear. It only makes sense that daycares have a similar policy to protect not only our privacy but the children in our care.
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