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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Feeling Bad About Consequences
mamamanda 08:43 AM 05-20-2015
My group hates to pick up toys. One dcg will help if prodded, but she complains the whole time. The rest flat out refuse. I've tried making it fun with a race, but then whoever loses throws a major tantrum. I'm so tired of clean up time being a fight so this week I implemented classroom jobs to make it more fun & give everyone a part. I thought if they all had a special responsibility they might want to take better care of things. So far its just been more work for me trying to teach them & oversee their "jobs." Plus they fight over the favorite jobs even though I explained everyone will get a turn. Yesterday they wouldn't pick up the playdoh so I told them if I picked it up I would throw it away & we wouldn't get more for a while. Lots of whining & tantrums later they picked it up. Today I asked 3 times for them to pick up the activity that was left out all over the floor. It has a lot of little pieces I don't want the younger crowd to find. I decided not to repeat yesterday S I picked it up myself & moved it to a closet & informed them they won't get it back this week. I feel bad b/c it is one of their favorite sets, but I don't know what else to do. Sometimes I feel so discouraged by their behavior. I love being with these kids, but I absolutely hate all the attitudes lately.
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Unregistered 08:47 AM 05-20-2015
You could just set out one small box of toys until they start listening.
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Rockgirl 08:51 AM 05-20-2015
Don't feel bad--it was their choice that got them the consequence. It's how they learn to make better choices!
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Unregistered 08:53 AM 05-20-2015
Originally Posted by Rockgirl:
Don't feel bad--it was their choice that got them the consequence. It's how they learn to make better choices!
Yes! It's a learning experience. Good for them and you
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Josiegirl 10:08 AM 05-20-2015
Originally Posted by Rockgirl:
Don't feel bad--it was their choice that got them the consequence. It's how they learn to make better choices!
Exactly!!
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Thriftylady 10:41 AM 05-20-2015
I agree with not feeling bad. But I have a rule you get nothing else out until you put what you have out away. So in my daycare, if they didn't put it away that is all they would be playing with all day. Now I do understand having the age group issues, so I guess putting it away is all you could do. When you do get it back out, remind them what will happen if they don't pick it up.
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Play Care 10:54 AM 05-20-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
You could just set out one small box of toys until they start listening.
This. Sounds as if there are way too many options for your current group. Box things up and store it elsewhere. You can always introduce things back in one at a time. Otherwise it just sounds exhausting!
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AmyKidsCo 01:29 PM 05-20-2015
"Pick up the toys you want to play with tomorrow." You pick up the rest and put them away somewhere.
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daycare 01:45 PM 05-20-2015
we have a rule that you can't move on to something else until you have completely cleaned up what you were playing with. If you have friends still playing with it, you must let me know that Johnny is now agreeing to clean it up since he is still playing with it.

rule is clean as you go. this way it's not so overwhelming when its clean up time.

If they don't clean it up and I have to do it, it goes away in the garage.

two years ago my group was so bad with clean up that one day they had 3 things to play with. I took everything away.

I told them that they had to show me for one week that they could take care of things and clean them up and I would let them earn a toy back each day. I wrote a letter to the parents telling them that I did this and asked them all to back me on this. All of the parents did. Of course the kids were crying to the parents that they didn't want to go to DC because Miss N took all of the toys away. Their parents even told them well you didn't clean up.

I tell the kids only brush the teeth you want to keep and only clean up the toys you want to keep. Everything gets cleaned up now.

If you don't clean it up, you don't move on..... I don't care if you choose to sit there all day next to your mess, it's your choice.

Let them understand that there are consequences in life no matter where you go.

However, make certain that you are very clear about your expectations of what you want them to do.

Johnny says can I play with the cars, yes you can, but you will need to clean them up after you are done....

i am sure you already do that, but sometimes its really important to keep setting the expectations of what you want them to do.
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MarinaVanessa 07:25 AM 05-21-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
You could just set out one small box of toys until they start listening.
This is what I was going to suggest.

When things get chaotic for me I go back to bare bones minimal. I remove almost everything and just leave "baby" toys out. A few cardboard books (if books get left laying around), a 4 or 5 plush animals, the wooden unit blocks and the kitchen playset with only a few pans and a couple of pieces of food. No accessories, no dolls, no cars, no trains, no dress up clothes etc. I explain that when things get left on the floor they get dirty or broken and they have to get thrown away and we won't have them to play with anymore. They can also cause other people to fall and get hurt. After a week or so I'll start slowly reintroducing toys back one at a time. If they start having a hard time putting stuff away again I stop introducing new things. If they still have a hard time I start removing things again.

Also what works is to be reminded about how things are to be used. I have activities based around how to take care of our toys and things. For the books I show them how to turn the pages, I show them an old book that is ripped and we talk about what happens to it, I will read the torn book and when it gets to the "good" part it has the pages ripped out <-- their faces. I go through these activities any time a new client starts and occasionally throughout the year so that the new kids learn the ropes and it's another reminder for the rest of the kids too.
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mamamanda 09:45 AM 05-21-2015
Thank you for all the great suggestions! Guess whose kids picked up without a fuss today? They sure did! And when they raced to clean up & one said, "Did I win?" Dcb responded, "We both won b/c we cleaned up! Let's high five each other!" What a change taking a few toys away makes. I decided if we continue to have problems we will only have a few options in my living room & they will have to earn back the play room, but today has been wonderful. I guess they just needed to know I was serious. They'll be happy to get the other toys back on Monday I'm sure!
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Thriftylady 11:48 AM 05-21-2015
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Thank you for all the great suggestions! Guess whose kids picked up without a fuss today? They sure did! And when they raced to clean up & one said, "Did I win?" Dcb responded, "We both won b/c we cleaned up! Let's high five each other!" What a change taking a few toys away makes. I decided if we continue to have problems we will only have a few options in my living room & they will have to earn back the play room, but today has been wonderful. I guess they just needed to know I was serious. They'll be happy to get the other toys back on Monday I'm sure!
Sometimes that is really the whole issue. Glad it is working!
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Unregistered 01:40 PM 05-21-2015
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
but today has been wonderful
yay!!
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kitykids3 01:47 PM 05-21-2015
I have the rule that they have to put away what they are playing with before taking something else out. If they are playing in drama area (with food, dishes, etc.) then they may have no more than 3 toys out at a time. I implemented this 2 months ago because they were in a funk refusing to pick up toys too. I've also started a sticker chart for when they pick up fast and good when it's time to clean up. Every 5 stickers is a field trip. They're doing better.
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