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Parents and Guardians Forum>Daycare Providers Wish Parents Knew These 12 Things
Michael 08:47 PM 11-26-2013
Admin: BlackCat posted this in another thread and I thought it would be a good place to post this in the Parent Category. We don't know who the original writer was but I'm sure we can all relate. If anyone wants to add to these 12, feel free to let us know.

1 - If your daycare provider closes because she is sick, she does NOT want to watch your kids! Yes, I've been asked.

2 – Your Daycare Provider loves your child, but she loves her own more. So, if your daycare is open from 6:30 to 4:30, respect that. Don't show up at 6:25 to drop your child off and then leave them in care til 4:45. Your daycare provider has a life, and wants to spend it with her own children, not yours. Sure, she may be up at 5:30, shoveling the driveway so that you can get in, or getting breakfast set up, or showering, or having some quiet time before the day starts. But
please respect that that is her personal time — not time for you to use as you please.

3 – When you "forget" to pay your Daycare Provider, she quite often will not be able to pay her own bills. Her bills include food for your child, heat for your child, water for your child, electricity for your child, insurance for your child, … well, you get the idea. She will need to remind you to pay (have you ever had to beg, nag and plead for YOUR pay check?) and that won't be a enjoyable job for anyone.

4 – You are paying for a daycare spot, in addition to the actual care your child receives. So if your child visits with Auntie Sue for the week and doesn't come to daycare, you still need to pay for the week. Home Daycare Providers need to be able to depend on a steady income. If they can't, they will either find a family that comes more regularly, or close the daycare because they need a job that pays the bills.

5 – Daycare Providers are in it for the money. Yes, Home Daycare Providers do this job because they love children. But would you do your job if you couldn't pay the bills with it? And Home Daycare Providers are not "raking it in". Yes, I've seen parents do the mental math when they think about what they're paying and multiply it by the number of kids in my care. Yes, we do make that amount, but then we deduct taxes (about 15%), daycare groceries and cleaning supplies (about 14%), extra insurance and utilities (about 10%), and any new toys, furniture, or outdoor equipment or repairs to our homes caused by running the daycare (5% – 20%). If you really do the math, you'll see that we're making much less than minimum wage.

6 – If your child throws up on your Home Daycare Provider, there is a very good chance she will not be able to change until closing, because there is simply no one else to watch the kids while she does. Please, please keep that in mind when your child does throws up at daycare. An "I'm so sorry this happened" goes a LONG way!

7 – Sick kids need to be at home. When you get sick, I'm sure the first thing on your mind is getting home to your own bed. When your child gets sick at daycare, they would much rather be picked up as soon as possible, rather than have to continue to go through the daycare routine (which may involve a bus run, playing outside, meal & snack times, etc). Your daycare provider does have other children in her care, and quite often can't sit with just one child without
adequately supervising the others.

8 – Kids do not have more fun at daycare than they would at home with their own toys and with their own Mommy and Daddy. As much as they enjoy playing with their friends, doing crafts and circle time, and going for walks, most kids would MUCH rather spend a day playing at home with their own toys, reading books with Mommy and wrestling with Daddy.

9 – Most Home Daycare Providers can't imagine taking time off without spending at least some of that time with their own kids. So it blows their minds when parents take a week off of work and still bring their children to daycare the same hours as every other week. You'd be surprised how excited your child gets when you show up early — they love it! And children even as young as 18 months will brag to the others about how their Mommy or Daddy is picking up first. So if you have the day off, why not spend a little of it with Junior and show up an hour or two early.

10 – There is a direct relationship between how many hours a child spends in daycare and their behavior. In general, the fewer hours a child spends in the care of someone other than Mommy or Daddy, the better behaved they are. Which means that just because your Home Daycare is open 12 hours a day, doesn't mean you should leave your child there 12 hours a day (which is 60 hours a week!). Children benefit from spending the most waking hours possible at home with parents.

11 – If your child starts daycare before the age of about 2, he or she will call your Provider "Mommy". As much as she reminds them of her name, they will still default to the name "Mommy".

12 – If you are at a good Home Daycare, your spot is likely in high demand. Do everything you can to follow the Provider's policies, because there is a good chance she can replace you very quickly.

The most important thing that your Home Daycare Provider wants you to know is this: She would LOVE to hear how much you appreciate how hard she works! She takes care of the most important thing in your life, she does it without breaks or meal times, and quite often she needs to run to the bathroom at close because she hasn't had a chance to pee during the day. She gets " love you's", hugs and kisses from the kids, but when you say "Thank you" at the end of a crazy day, it makes it all worthwhile!
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Laurel 04:26 AM 11-27-2013
Also with #5 we are often not full. At first glance a parent may multiply how many children times what each pays but do they realize that you may not have been full all year? Sometimes it takes quite a while to find someone new.

Laurel
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jessrlee 06:42 PM 11-27-2013
Amen!!
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Meeko 01:15 PM 11-28-2013

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DBug 09:49 AM 01-17-2014
That's from my blog . Here's the original link: http://welcometothezoo.ca/?p=498

I'm glad to see it's getting exposure!
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Blackcat31 10:58 AM 01-17-2014
Originally Posted by DBug:
That's from my blog . Here's the original link: http://welcometothezoo.ca/?p=498

I'm glad to see it's getting exposure!


Did you write it?

I hate not being able to give credit where credit is due.

I got the link off another forum where someone else posted it.
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DBug 07:05 AM 01-18-2014
Yep, it's my original writing . I finally bought my own domain name within the last year or so, so it may also be posted under beautifulchaos.tk or at Wordpress -- I had no idea what I was doing when I started, lol!

Here are a couple other posts that *may* be of interest :

What Not To Do When Dropping Your Child Off At Daycare -- this one's been making the rounds on Facebook.

You Know You're A Daycare Provider When ...

Enjoy!
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Blackcat31 07:15 AM 01-18-2014
Originally Posted by DBug:
Yep, it's my original writing . I finally bought my own domain name within the last year or so, so it may also be posted under beautifulchaos.tk or at Wordpress -- I had no idea what I was doing when I started, lol!

Here are a couple other posts that *may* be of interest :

What Not To Do When Dropping Your Child Off At Daycare -- this one's been making the rounds on Facebook.

You Know You're A Daycare Provider When ...

Enjoy!
Thank you!!

Nice job! Your blog is great!!
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Josiegirl 03:44 PM 08-07-2014
Oh those are great!! You think dcparents would get offended if I put it front and center on the bulletin board?
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AmyKidsCo 08:48 PM 08-07-2014
Love these! She's got more guts than I have; I'm always paranoid about offending someone through my blog.
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Babybear911 09:11 AM 01-21-2015
love your blog! read this the other day on facebook! I am giving all new parents who register in my daycare your link to review this info! Fabulous!!
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Rachel 09:36 PM 01-24-2015
Ha I was picking up my 2 year old the other day (here we have to send our own kids out at 2), and were the last ones (4:20 and she closes at 4:30, but still he's usually not last), and I told him "c'mon, put on your coat, X doesn't love you after 4:30 ). Her husband was home and just started laughing, and she did also. We were out by about 4:22 but still, I hate being the last parent and wanted to show her I know she also has a life .
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daycarediva 04:59 AM 01-25-2015
Originally Posted by Rachel:
Ha I was picking up my 2 year old the other day (here we have to send our own kids out at 2), and were the last ones (4:20 and she closes at 4:30, but still he's usually not last), and I told him "c'mon, put on your coat, X doesn't love you after 4:30 ). Her husband was home and just started laughing, and she did also. We were out by about 4:22 but still, I hate being the last parent and wanted to show her I know she also has a life .
That's absolutely awesome! She does still love your child, but it's especially long at the end of the day when there is one child left. Thank you for understanding that, and for your sense of humor! I have parents most often want to stay and chat when that happens since I am not busy with other kids
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Rachel 11:45 PM 01-29-2015
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
That's absolutely awesome! She does still love your child, but it's especially long at the end of the day when there is one child left. Thank you for understanding that, and for your sense of humor! I have parents most often want to stay and chat when that happens since I am not busy with other kids
I know, because I do daycare also. I love the kids and I see them around the neighborhood and it's great. But he was just being slow and 2 and cute and smiling at her and saying her name and "bye bye" and I was trying to hurry him up. Because I've been there . Because of my hours (we work the same hours) she knows he's often the first there (but not by much) ,but I make a big effort to pick him up *not* last. That particular day my older kids weren't around to pick up and my *own* daycare kids didn't pick up until 4:15 so until I crossed the street it was a few minutes. Even so usually she has kids there until 4:30 and of course the one day I get there at 4:20 he's the last one. Oh well I do try and she knows that. He wasn't the last by more than a minute though, saw the other one leaving as I was coming in.
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molles 09:59 AM 06-18-2015
These are amazing folks who get a lot less credit than they deserve
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kbennet 10:27 AM 11-19-2015
Great list! Parents dropping their sick kids off always gets me. They're just asking for every kid (and me) to catch what they've got.
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kerrielou 09:48 AM 05-10-2016
My kids are older and we were fortunate to be able to afford to have someone come into our home, but this one really used to slay me.

She was the daughter of my mom's friend so we gave her a chance, because she really needed the money. The arrangement was that she would bring her 2 year old and watch our 4 small children in our home. She went through all the hoops and qualified for assistance with daycare. The state paid for x many hours a week. So she started taking her toddler to day care for half the day while caring for our kids at home. Only our 2 youngest were even at home the entire day!

I cannot imagine what the provider thought. We had used her previously, but never had occasion to ask. I can't imagine it didn't get under her skin to know her pay was being provided by the state for a mom who worked as a care provider, just as a private babysitter. We didn't keep her long, because she didn't really like to work as evidenced by apparently not wanting to look after her own son in a position which should have made that an ideal situation for her. My kids loved her little boy and he loved them. It was just the craziest thing.
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kerrielou 11:15 AM 05-10-2016
She justified it by calling it "preschool" ( I think that is what the assistance actually paid for), but it so obviously wasn't the real reason and preschool is not generally 20 hours a week. It was because her son was still in diapers and younger than my kids so he needed more constant supervision. She couldn't just plop him in front of the TV and take a nap.

The provider she used is great. We used her when we only had one that needed full day care and she was very professional, but I don't know that I would call it a preschool. I know she did the best she could, but I can't imagine it's easy to provide a full preschool experience when you are completely on your own with 12 kids and several of them are infants and toddlers. I saw it more like daycare plus, rather than a facility wholly dedicated to preschool. We're probably kind of snobby as ours went to a Montessori preschool and we were lucky enough to be able to afford that, but when you send your kids to "preschool" for 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, and in diapers to boot, that's not about providing a preschool experience.

She could have easily used the funds to send him to a preschool-only facility with most of the resources dedicated to age appropriate preschool learning, but for the usual 2-3 hours a day, 2-3 days a week. She probably could have sent him the same Montessori preschool we sent our kids too and she had full flexibility to drive him back and forth, to and from, whatever facility she chose.

Anyway, it just didn't make sense to me and I think it fits with the many comments here regarding parents who just want to be rid of their kids as many hours a day as possible whether they are working that day or not.
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ADJKS 11:09 AM 10-30-2019
I posted the link to the article on FB group I’m in. I was pretty much blasted and told the article was mom shaming and judgmental.

I think the article is spot on. I left the group. 💁🏻
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Cat Herder 11:27 AM 10-30-2019
Originally Posted by ADJKS:
I posted the link to the article on FB group I’m in. I was pretty much blasted and told the article was mom shaming and judgmental.

I think the article is spot on. I left the group. 💁🏻
Didn't they just shame and judge you for disagreeing?

Who needs them.
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Snowmom 11:47 AM 10-30-2019
Originally Posted by ADJKS:
I posted the link to the article on FB group I’m in. I was pretty much blasted and told the article was mom shaming and judgmental.

I think the article is spot on. I left the group. 💁🏻
I hope you told them where they could shove it before you left.
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Josiegirl 02:13 PM 10-30-2019
Originally Posted by ADJKS:
I posted the link to the article on FB group I’m in. I was pretty much blasted and told the article was mom shaming and judgmental.

I think the article is spot on. I left the group. 💁🏻
Sounds like maybe they were guilty of some themselves and saw nothing wrong with treating their child's provider like @rap.
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Ariana 07:56 PM 11-04-2019
Everything falls under a new blanket term now called “mom shaming”. Anytime anyone accuses a parent of being a jerk we are mom shaming
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