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Parents and Guardians Forum>2 Hour Naps @ Daycare?
SomeSimpleGuy 02:39 PM 07-28-2012
My daycare is forcing my 6 and 3 year old children to nap for over 2 hours!

First , is this even legal?

Does anyone , anywhere make there children nap for that long?

Sometimes , I know they nap there for over 2 hours.

My wife doesn't seem to believe me, but I stop in unannounced , and am frequently dissapointed.

I think a 45 min to 1 hour nap is more than standard?

Please help me

Thank you in advance
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Childminder 03:24 PM 07-28-2012
Our scheduled rest time is for two hours here also. Imo the three year old needs at least that depending on what he/she sleeps at night. The six year old if here would lay down for a quiet time at the same time and if he/she falls asleep then he/she needs the sleep, if not then he/she would be up after a 30 minute rest and participate in a quiet activity until the others wake.

Here is the recommendation from the CDC: http://www.cdc.gov/Features/Sleep/
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shelby 03:33 PM 07-28-2012
I know when I was teaching in daycare before I started doing my own, that we were required by the state for nap time to be at least 2 hrs. they stated that 2 hrs was the min. I do not require my older ones to nap, but they have to stay quiet ... and they have to rest for at least an hr. no playing no talking, etc.

Really this is the only time I can even think some days.. It is my break where I can get some stuff done like the dishes done from lunch etc.
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youretooloud 04:07 PM 07-28-2012
Two hours is the standard required nap time. It's not even a choice the daycare has. It's been that way since at least the early 80s. In fact, now that I think about it.. I went to a daycare in the early 60s and I had to take a nap then too.

However, I don't understand why a six year old is napping. Can't he or she do quiet time? As far as our own state, it's only required UNTIL kindergarten, and the grade school kids still must rest, but there's no required time limit, and they aren't expected to sleep. In fact, i'm surprised your six year old is sleeping.
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daycarediva 04:23 PM 07-28-2012
It's required here as well up to age 5. Rest periods for kids are 5-12. If your 6 year old is napping, then he/she needs the sleep.
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BusyBee 06:59 PM 07-28-2012
2 hours is totally standard. Dropping in at naptime? I personally would not be too happy. Any other time of the day is kosher, but naptime is not cool imo.
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Snowbunny 07:20 PM 07-28-2012
I agree with BusyBee...dropping in at naptime would not make me happy. And, if you wake a child, you've qualified for a $10 penalty. A 2 hr. nap is about average for my toddlers/preschoolers. Like the other posters said, if a school age child is falling asleep, then they needed that nap.
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cheerfuldom 08:09 PM 07-28-2012
Were you not aware of the napping policy before enrolling your child?

I know about a half dozen local daycares in my area and they all nap for at least 2 hours, if not more.

My group is 4 and younger and everyone naps for 3 hours here. I dont take kids that dont nap so I wouldnt even accept the 6 year old into care.....but I know the private school that my daughter will be attending requires a 2 hour rest/nap period for both preK and kindergarten and that probably does included some 6 year olds. I know a lot of places have gone to half day kindergartens but all the full day ones that I know of, require a nap/quiet time period.
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saved4always 08:10 PM 07-28-2012
I have watched many children over the years and most took a nap that lasted about 1 1/2 to 2 hours. A few regularly slept even longer. Most of the children I have cared for were between the ages of 3 months and 4 years old. They would get here very early in the morning and were definitely ready for a rest after lunchtime. I have never heard of any provider in my area purposely napping children for only 45 minutes. When I did in-home childcare, nap was generally from 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. (some would sleep a little longer...I did not wake them unless they were going to go past 3:30). Nap time at the center I work for now is a scheduled 2 1/2 hours. Children who wake early are given a quiet activity until rest time is over. This seems to be standard for our area daycares and inhome childcare providers.
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Countrygal 05:54 AM 07-29-2012
I just had this issue with a dcd. He wanted me to shorten the nap time. This is disruptive to the other children and his child, in particular, seemed to need the nap, usually slept longer than the others, and was extremely hard to waken.

A daycare has a schedule. If a parent asks for one or two children to be different than the others in that schedule it causes problems for everyone. I consider it quite rude and unthoughtful, actually. Why should your three year old only take a 45 min. nap when all the other ones are taking 1 1/2 to 2 hr naps? And what should he do while they are napping? Should he be allowed to wake up everyone else because he is whiney and crying because he was woken up? Can you imagine what it would be like if all four or six are then woken up earlier than they wanted and are all whiney and fussy for the rest of the day???

My kids are all required to lay down for one hour. They always fall asleep and sleep between 1 1/2 and 2 hours. The older ones are allowed to get up after 1 hour whether they sleep or not and do a quiet activity. This is their "special" time without the littles.
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MaritimeMummy 06:00 AM 07-29-2012
In my opinion, if your children are sleeping those two hours, they NEED it, and aren't being FORCED into anything.

here at my day care, all my kids must have a rest period of 30 minutes. They lay on their mats during that time with a blanket and a look quietly at books. If they fall asleep during that time, they needed it, and I allow them to sleep as long as they need without taking them up, whether that is 20 minutes, 1 hour, 2 hours, or 3 hours. I stop being quiet in the house after 2 hours so the children can rouse on their own, but I NEVER go in and wake up a sleeping child by telling them it's time to get up.

If they don't fall asleep during that time, they can get up and play quietly.

So again, if your children are sleeping, it doesn't matter their ages, they needed it. You can't force a person (baby, child, or even adult) to sleep if they don't want/need it.

I also agree with the others who say that dropping in at naptime is not acceptable.

Was this not something that was discussed during the interview process? Was it not clearly defined in a parent handbook or contract? What exactly were your expectations? Did you lay them out to the provider? Providers cannot read minds. If she is allowing them time to sleep and they sleep, and she doesn't know that you don't want them to sleep, she can't possibly know that you're angry and will continue doing it.

And yes, it's legal. You can't withhold sleep from a child who needs it. THAT is illegal.
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Truly Scrumptious 07:10 AM 07-29-2012
I agree with KHiltz...you can't force anyone to sleep if they don't want to. And 2-3 hours is the standard naptime for child cares here. In my experience, parents that want their children to sleep less during the day are having a hard time enforcing bedtime in their own homes.

Dropping in at naptime is rude and inconsiderate and would be cause for an immediate dismissal.

And, if you're so frequently dissapointed when you drop in, then find other child care. But, you'll be hard pressed to find a child care that will let parents be in charge.
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Blackcat31 07:36 AM 07-29-2012
Originally Posted by SomeSimpleGuy:
My daycare is forcing my 6 and 3 year old children to nap for over 2 hours!

First , is this even legal?

Does anyone , anywhere make there children nap for that long?

Sometimes , I know they nap there for over 2 hours.

My wife doesn't seem to believe me, but I stop in unannounced , and am frequently dissapointed.

I think a 45 min to 1 hour nap is more than standard?

Please help me

Thank you in advance
I am sorry that you are frequently dissapointed in your child care and the services they are providing, however, this is an excellent example of why communication is extremely important between parents and providers.

You need to talk openly with your provider about what your expectations are. Are your child falling asleep and actually sleeping the full two hours or are they laying on their mats awake the entire time?

If they are actually sleeping the full time, they are obviously in need of a nap that long. If they are just laying there awake, it may be time to find other child care that better suits your childrens needs.

I also want to point out that the amount of time a 6 year old needs for nap and what a 3 year old needs for nap is probably very different.

Please communicate with you provider about this issue. Whether other providers have 2 hour, 4 hour or no nap time at all should make no difference in what YOUR children need. Whether others agree with your provider or with you should really have no bearing on this, as it is YOUR job as a parent to know your child's needs and find suitable care that meets those individual needs.

Not all providers have nap times and not all providers discourage drop ins during the day (including nap time). I hope you can work this out with your provider and do what is best for your children.
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AnneCordelia 05:15 AM 07-30-2012
At my daycare all children under at 4 have a 2 hour nap. This is clearly laid out in my handbook and all my clients understand that their child is not an exception.

All children 4 and over are able to stay up for nap time but they must have a quiet activity (book, colouring, puzzles).
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Unregistered 04:48 PM 12-06-2012
I agree that if they fall asleep they needed it, or fell asleep from boredom of not being engaged by the preschool teacher, I did ask before I enrolled my son was told he did not have to sleep but had to be quiet during this time, ok fine. Since he started I struggle every nite to get him to fall asleep he is still awake very late, come to find out he is sleeping for 2+ hours everyday. No wonder I can't get him down at a decent time. We were spoiled at his previous school, Holy Cross rocked! But we had to move out of state, I'm talking to them tomorrow about these 2 hour naps at his new school, we may be on the search for a new place.
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kitykids3 12:22 PM 12-07-2012
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I agree that if they fall asleep they needed it, or fell asleep from boredom of not being engaged by the preschool teacher, I did ask before I enrolled my son was told he did not have to sleep but had to be quiet during this time, ok fine. Since he started I struggle every nite to get him to fall asleep he is still awake very late, come to find out he is sleeping for 2+ hours everyday. No wonder I can't get him down at a decent time. We were spoiled at his previous school, Holy Cross rocked! But we had to move out of state, I'm talking to them tomorrow about these 2 hour naps at his new school, we may be on the search for a new place.
Which one? The 3 yr old or 6 year old.
I don't force a kid to nap - you can't make them sleep. However we do lay down on our mats for 2-3 hours, from approximately 12:30-3. All my kiddos are under 5 and sleep for 2+ hours on their own. Schoolagers I have had in past usually don't, but I do have them rest for a half hour. If they are still awake, then they can get up and do something quiet.
Those 2 hours of nap are needed for most kids under 5. Occasionally I have had some 4 year olds grow out of them, but if your 3 year old is sleeping, then let him sleep.
If it is disrupting night time sleep, then talk with the provider about it. It is standard for 2+ hour nap for 3 year olds. Personally I am curious as to what you are considering 'late' as far as bedtime. I would not be waking my 3 year olds up after 45 minutes. Communication with your provider is best for your child. Perhaps you both can experiment a little.
Also, although I allow it (with notification), visiting during naptime is very disruptive and I would not be happy with it either. Why would you be making unannounced stops during naptime? If you feel the need to check up, then you need to work it out with your provider or move on. I would not want clients feeling they needed to make unannounced visits just to check up on things here. You've got to be able to trust your provider and vice versa.

ETA: 2 hours IS standard for under 5. I let them get up after a half hour if awake. That has never happened with a 3 yr old with me, but 'quiet time' if still awake is standard too.
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crazydaycarelady 02:14 PM 12-14-2012
I agree that 2 hours is the standard nap time but once my dckids outgrow a nap they no longer have to lay down. They usually do something quiet or watch TV so the younger kids can sleep. I can't even imagine that a 6yo would need a regular nap.

I have never laid a 6yo down for nap and I have been doing this a long time. I think if he was able to go to sleep at a decent hour at night he probably would not be so tired the next day.
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Country Kids 02:20 PM 12-14-2012
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
I agree that 2 hours is the standard nap time but once my dckids outgrow a nap they no longer have to lay down. They usually do something quiet or watch TV so the younger kids can sleep. I can't even imagine that a 6yo would need a regular nap.
I actually napped every day at 6 years old. Fell asleep the same time every day in first grade (afternoon story time). To this day I can take a nap if given the chance. Some people actually are nappers and need them to function.
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providerandmomof4 03:45 PM 12-14-2012
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
I actually napped every day at 6 years old. Fell asleep the same time every day in first grade (afternoon story time). To this day I can take a nap if given the chance. Some people actually are nappers and need them to function.
Me too! Even when I was in high school, I would come home and take a nap (unintentionally- I would just fall asleep) Can't anymore..dang it! Two of my kids are the same way, and then they want to stay up later at bedtime...so it can be a problem and a vicious cycle! During the week I have to try and keep them up and they can be really cranky! They are getting better the older they get but sleep is always an issue. If they don't get enough then we all pay! Oh if the world would just start a little later for all of us nappers
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wdmmom 09:40 PM 12-14-2012
After changing diapers, our group goes down at 1230pm. It usually takes 10 to 20minutes for everyone to doze off. The first one is usually awake around 245pm-310pm. Each and every child I have(youngest is 7 months, oldest is 4) naps AT LEAST 2 hours every single day.
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CozyHome 01:56 AM 12-15-2012
My daycare children nap from 12:45ish for 2-3 hours. I let them sleep as long as their little bodies and minds need it. I don't allow pickups until 3:30 so I'm protecting their naptimes and have time to change all the diapers and feed them an afternoon snack.

Why do you feel you should pop in unexpectedly? Don't you trust your caregiver? If you don't then you should find one you trust completely.
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Unregistered 04:29 AM 02-27-2013
I have been a preschool teacher for over 15 years in Vermont. Our regulations state that children should be given a quiet rest/nap time for 30 minutes. Here is the actual quote from our regs,
"9. For children in care for more than five hours there shall be an opportunity to rest for
at least 30 minutes, but no child shall be forced to sleep. For children who don’t
require sleep, time and space shall be provided for quiet play."

It surprises me that so many people think regulations require hours on a mat. Certainly I agree some children need a long nap. In my program, if they are not asleep after 30 minutes to 45 minutes, I get them up off their mat.
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Starburst 04:02 PM 02-27-2013
In CA we need to provide at least one 2 hour rest period for young children in our care. I think trying to force a a 6 year old to sleep on a mat for that long if they are not tired is bad but if the child is tired according to the NAEYC it is unethical to keep them up during a rest time just because they are older. I will have in my rules that children under 5 (children who are not yet in Kindergarten) will be required to take a nap- but if I notice a 4 or 5 year old frequently does not fall asleep than I will try to come up with a quite activity such as reading, coloring, posibly watching a movie once in a while. but it is still group care and if the child cannot remain quiet during this time and are constantly making it difficult for others to sleep, than they will need to lay on a mat quietly during that time. The other children have a right to a quiet environment to sleep in.
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Unregistered 08:10 PM 03-06-2013
I live in Australia and my 4 1/2 year old son is patted to sleep everyday - much to my disgust..... he is a very active boy and has lots of energy; if he doesnt sleep at day care he is asleep in bed at 7.30-8pm at night and sleeps for a good 12 hours.
I dont believe all centres should have the policy that all children are required to sleep (happy with a rest or quiet time) - its like a one size fits all policy for clothing and it doesnt work.
When my 4 1/2 year old is still awake and hard to settle at 10.30pm at night - then I beg to differ on the sleeping policy. As a parent of 2 children - one who is almost 9 and is constantly getting disturbed by his wide awake brother late at night - then having the difficulty to get them out of bed in the morning as they've had a late night - its a viscious , unhealthy cycle.
I certainly do not think it is rude, selfish or inconsiderate of parent to request for their child not to sleep and some comments in this forum have really hit a nerve. Parents know their children best. My son is at daycare 6-7 hours a day at most, 2 of those hours are sleeping times - which like I said before is encouraged by rocking, patting and soft music - I dont agree at all. Just to appease the lunch roster, get time to do dishes or aleviate staffing issues - surely that cannot be a good enough reason to disrupt the childs sleeping patterns in an evening, which on a regular basis has an effect on a much grander scale in a family.

I wonder when the day care centre closes its doors a the end of the day, that they have any thought for the turmutulous evening faced by a lot of parents whos child has had a lengthy sleep at kindy.
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MissAnn 03:59 AM 03-07-2013
In my program we have rest time for 2 hours as well. No child is required to sleep or even encouraged to do so. Kids bring a stack of books to bed. I keep lights on until they fall asleep. One child often stays awake for an hour.

7:30 bedtime seems pretty early. Maybe there is a compromise. If center would let him read he might stay awake longer at nap and maybe your son could go to bed at 8 or 8:30. That would give you a little more family time as well.
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MyAngels 05:22 AM 03-07-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I live in Australia and my 4 1/2 year old son is patted to sleep everyday - much to my disgust..... he is a very active boy and has lots of energy; if he doesnt sleep at day care he is asleep in bed at 7.30-8pm at night and sleeps for a good 12 hours.
I dont believe all centres should have the policy that all children are required to sleep (happy with a rest or quiet time) - its like a one size fits all policy for clothing and it doesnt work.
When my 4 1/2 year old is still awake and hard to settle at 10.30pm at night - then I beg to differ on the sleeping policy. As a parent of 2 children - one who is almost 9 and is constantly getting disturbed by his wide awake brother late at night - then having the difficulty to get them out of bed in the morning as they've had a late night - its a viscious , unhealthy cycle.
I certainly do not think it is rude, selfish or inconsiderate of parent to request for their child not to sleep and some comments in this forum have really hit a nerve. Parents know their children best. My son is at daycare 6-7 hours a day at most, 2 of those hours are sleeping times - which like I said before is encouraged by rocking, patting and soft music - I dont agree at all. Just to appease the lunch roster, get time to do dishes or aleviate staffing issues - surely that cannot be a good enough reason to disrupt the childs sleeping patterns in an evening, which on a regular basis has an effect on a much grander scale in a family.

I wonder when the day care centre closes its doors a the end of the day, that they have any thought for the turmutulous evening faced by a lot of parents whos child has had a lengthy sleep at kindy.
I'm curious as to why you have not looked for another care situation that would allow your child to stay up during the day? It seems like that would solve a lot of problems that you are having in the evening.
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MrsSteinel'sHouse 11:04 AM 03-07-2013
Mine generally nap for 3 hours. I try not to do school age but on snow days etc they seem to need that nap as much as my little ones! I am a home provider so it is just me. I do need nap time since I do care 6:30- 6:30! But, I feel it is important for my little ones. Most are out of bed before 7 every morning and we play hard! I am lucky to keep them awake through lunch some days. They are down for nap by 12 and up by 3. I do think an early nap is important. That gives them about 5 hours before bed and an hour (at least) of play outside during tht time. My parents like a good nap time so thy don't have crabby kids at night! When they don't get a good nap they tend to fall asleep on the way home, then woken up and are then crabby.
I would have a huge issue with you popping in at nap time. My parents know if they show up they are taking their kidlet with them and if it during nap time I need to know in advance what time and I will bring them out to th driveway. They are not to come to the door!! It is not fair to me for them to wake my kidlets!
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Unregistered 03:46 AM 03-08-2013
Because a child takes a nap at daycare, has nothing to do with a child not going to sleep at night. It is nothing but a blame game by the parents. Be a parent, not their best buddy and parent your child. So many times over the years, I have been confronted with...Please don't let Susie sleep more than 45 min, she doesn't go to sleep at night. I do nothing different, Susie still sleeps 2 to 2.5 hours per day, BUT I tell parents she only slept 45 min and amazingly her sleep issues have subsided. No change in sleep at daycare and a little white lie to parent, works everytime. lol

And special requests to keep Susie up, when you are a one person team with 1 daycare space in your home, it is very hard to allow 1 child to stay up while the others sleep. It just doesn't work. 1 kid stays up then you have 2 wanting to stay up. Nope, not going to happen. Most home daycares are small group care. If you want special you need to hire a nanny for one on one care. A provider has to do what is best for her and her group, not 1 individual child.

I never understood why parents would put their kids to bed at 7:30/8, don't they want to spend time with their kids? My own kids never slept 12 hours at a time and they were in daycare for 8 years, went to bed at 9pm and up at 5:30, napped everyday till went to school. Sometimes parents need to step back and regroup and ask themselves if their request to their provider is doable in a group setting.
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mrsnj 01:32 PM 03-12-2013
Two hours here too. Sometimes slightly longer if they are knocked out and still sleeping at wake up time..... I might leave them slightly longer. HOWEVER, I do not make school age children nap. The 6 yr old would not be REQUIRED to take a nap. He could bring a sleeping bag and pillow to rest if needed (I too have had 6 yrs old still want a naptime) but they are not forced too. They can lay and watch tv, read a book, sleep, play, whatever. Children prek and younger however are required to take naps.
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renodeb 08:33 AM 03-25-2013
When you showed up unannounced what did you witness? In most states we are required to have a nap/rest time. I think it is wrong of your child care to "force a nap". It is more unusual for a 6 year old to not fall asleep at all. I must say that I don't have many older kids in my care but in the past I would have the tv on real low or have them read or something quiet while others were asleep. They didn't have to sleep but they had to be quiet. My nap/rest time is two hours as well and most do sleep for that whole time. If they wake before the others they have to be quiet until the others wake but they certainly don't have to sleep. Are you saying that there forced to sleep that whole time or just be on there mat the whole time? (big difference!. Most daycares are around two hours depending on age groups, that does seem a little long for a 6 y/o! I would maybe start looking for new dc? No child should be forced. Is it a home dc? Mixed ages? That may make it harder to have seperate spaces where the older child can just do a quite activity til others wake. It seems that this Dad is being ganged up on a bit. I think 2 hours is the norm in most dc's. They may not sleep the whole time but they have to be quiet.
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Cradle2crayons 09:00 PM 04-10-2013
I require nap time for all kids 5 and under who are here all day. That nap time is from 1230 pm until whenever they wake up. My sibling group's parents told me even at home on the weekends they have "sleeping trouble at night" and refuse to take naps at home. They are my first two asleep here and on date nights for parents I've kept them overnight without the FIRST problem.

HOWEVER, from the other side, when my now ten year old stayed in a daycare setting years ago, both licensed and unlicensed, they had trouble getting her to nap and if she did nap, bedtime was a nightmare.

So, I'd have to say, this issue I think is completely individual and should be handled such. My almost 5 year old son doesn't like naps, but still needs them, and does take them, no option. My 14 month old dcg takes two naps while in my care. At first, I was doing the one nap time and she was irritable by 1000 am and by nap time was so tired she didn't nap well. Now that its twice a day, she's doing awesome. Yet another scenario, my developmentally and physically delayed precious dcg is a late afternoon arrival (around 400 pm) and is put in bed same time as one other dcg and my personal kids and is picked up around midnight with my other late dck. So all of my kids are very different lol
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Unregistered 09:07 AM 04-11-2013
I have done home daycare for over 16 plus years! It never ceases to amaze or sadden me that some parents ( I realize not all) have their children in daycare for 8 or more hours a day, pick them up 5pm or later, rush home to feed them, haul the kids to activities several nights out of the week and then come to daycare the next morning, frustrated with the provider that their child fell asleep at 9:00p the night before instead of 8pm! Yep it must be that they are are napping way too long at daycare, nevermind that there possibly is no bedtime routine, kids are being dragged around all evening and then rushed home and expected to fall asleep immediately! In some cases the parents I have had over the years have told me that bedtime is at such and such a time, I know what time they are picking up their child from my house...many times they are spending a max of 2-3hrs per day with their child! The parents are coming home exhausted from their workday, and have little energy or paitence to spend with their own child, they don't want to deal with bedtime behaviors and can't wait to lay their child down to have some "me" time! I have bitten my tongue many times when a parent has asked me to stop napping their child because they are not going to bed at night for them! I would love to have the guts to say..."Maybe your child missed you yesterday and just needs some extra time with mom!" Yes kids do act up with they want attention! Sad and frustrating from a providers stand point as well!
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Unregistered 06:09 AM 04-22-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I live in Australia and my 4 1/2 year old son is patted to sleep everyday - much to my disgust..... he is a very active boy and has lots of energy; if he doesnt sleep at day care he is asleep in bed at 7.30-8pm at night and sleeps for a good 12 hours.
I dont believe all centres should have the policy that all children are required to sleep (happy with a rest or quiet time) - its like a one size fits all policy for clothing and it doesnt work.
When my 4 1/2 year old is still awake and hard to settle at 10.30pm at night - then I beg to differ on the sleeping policy. As a parent of 2 children - one who is almost 9 and is constantly getting disturbed by his wide awake brother late at night - then having the difficulty to get them out of bed in the morning as they've had a late night - its a viscious , unhealthy cycle.
I certainly do not think it is rude, selfish or inconsiderate of parent to request for their child not to sleep and some comments in this forum have really hit a nerve. Parents know their children best. My son is at daycare 6-7 hours a day at most, 2 of those hours are sleeping times - which like I said before is encouraged by rocking, patting and soft music - I dont agree at all. Just to appease the lunch roster, get time to do dishes or aleviate staffing issues - surely that cannot be a good enough reason to disrupt the childs sleeping patterns in an evening, which on a regular basis has an effect on a much grander scale in a family.

I wonder when the day care centre closes its doors a the end of the day, that they have any thought for the turmutulous evening faced by a lot of parents whos child has had a lengthy sleep at kindy.

I don't see this as an issue of time to do the dishes, but as an issue of teaching a child how important rest is to the body. Rest and sleep are essential to ALL humans, and most of us are not getting enough. If the child is falling asleep, then he DOES need the sleep. I would never ask a provider to keep a child awake for my own convenience (being able to put him to sleep at 7:30PM, for example). A tired child needs sleep, period. If a child does not wish to sleep, then it makes sense to provide quiet time in another area, but quiet time is necessary from the older children to ensure that they don't awaken the younger children who also have a need (and right) to sleep.
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DaisyMamma 06:12 PM 04-25-2013
Originally Posted by BusyBee:
2 hours is totally standard. Dropping in at naptime? I personally would not be too happy. Any other time of the day is kosher, but naptime is not cool imo.

No! I would be very unhappy.

You need to communicate with your provider with what your child needs.
Most daycares are a MINIMUM of two hours for 3 years. 6 year olds generally don't nap, but might have rest time or quiet time.
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Unregistered 07:35 PM 05-16-2013
My 4 yr old NEVER takes a nap when she is at home, but when she is at daycare she sleeps 1-2 hrs. I don't agree with the people who say she NEEDS the sleep, because guess what happens when she sleeps that long? She is up until 11 pm that night!! This happened yesterday/last night and as result she only got 8 hrs of sleep last night before having to wake up to go to daycare where she OF COURSE slept 2 hrs today because she was exhausted from not sleeping last night. So now, here I am as I type watching my wide awake chi,d quietly play with babies with not a tired bone in her body at 9:30 pm. Guess we're destined for a repeat tonight. Thanks, daycare.
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Unregistered 08:10 PM 05-16-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My 4 yr old NEVER takes a nap when she is at home, but when she is at daycare she sleeps 1-2 hrs. I don't agree with the people who say she NEEDS the sleep, because guess what happens when she sleeps that long? She is up until 11 pm that night!! This happened yesterday/last night and as result she only got 8 hrs of sleep last night before having to wake up to go to daycare where she OF COURSE slept 2 hrs today because she was exhausted from not sleeping last night. So now, here I am as I type watching my wide awake chi,d quietly play with babies with not a tired bone in her body at 9:30 pm. Guess we're destined for a repeat tonight. Thanks, daycare.
Kids very rarely behave exactly the same at home as they do for others. So, the same stands to reason for sleep too. Your kid probably doesn't WANT to sleep (what kid actually does? They'll miss out on everything, of course!) but at daycare, there is a routine and rules to abide by and most kids will follow the rules, no problem. You can set the same rules at home, but if you do not follow-through the same way, the child probably is going to test you a lot more than they will their dcp. Maybe YOU have to step up and tell her it's time for the dolls to be put away and lay her down like the provider does at nap. Chances are, though, that if you haven't had this routine down the WHOLE time, you'll have a heck of a fight on your hands for at least 2 weeks (That's if you stick with it). My DCK's used to sleep from 12p-2p (usually got up around 1:30 though but the baby would sleep til 2). They ALSO went to bed on time. Why? Because the parents I had enforced their bed time with their kids. They had rituals. Dinner, bath, teeth brushed, bedtime. Every night was the same unless unforseen circumstances arose (rarely). The kids knew what was expected of them and it wasn't a problem. It's only a problem if you make it one and if you do not enforce the rules in your house. And if you did, your child would NOT be up PLAYING at 9:30 at night. Even if they are not "tired" why would you let them do something stimulating when you want them to sleep??
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Familycare71 04:42 PM 05-17-2013
All I can say is if you don't like your current providers rules- switch providers, hire a nanny or stay home!
It really is that simple- I WILL NoT keep a child awake so that a parent has an easier time at home- it disrupts the group and that child is generally overtired, cranky and getting disciplined for no good reason at all.
If you don't like it change it- and if I had a parent dropping in at nap time frequently I would be terming so the issue wouldn't be an issue for long!
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Unregistered 07:39 AM 06-12-2013
Hmm, this is a little disappointing to hear. Especially the comment from the daycare provider about not working with the parent to tweak the nap schedule in order to assist the parents at night (except she was much more blunt in saying "I'm not going to change what I'm doing to make it easier on the parents during the evening!"). Obviously working parents need the support of daycare providers and the approach to child care should be partnered and lock-step. While I totally get that daycare providers need a break, what they fail to realize is that they can sometimes be putting their own needs above the needs of the child. As a parent who has a child in daycare, I completely understand the need for my daycare provider to get a break during the day and that this usually happens at nap time. What they may fail to understand is that every child is different. While my oldest napped daily until four years old and still went to bed and woke at a decent hour, my youngest needs much less sleep and his schedule needs to be tweaked to accommodate his developmental changes. When my youngest naps too long during the day, he ends up falling asleep much later that night, then waking during the night and waking very early. Because of this, he is missing sleep and then needs to catch up on that sleep during the day where he takes an even longer nap (which daycare is all too happy to allow) thus making he fall asleep even later and wake even later and on and on. It becomes a vicious cycle. I think that comment about "well if the child is sleeping then he NEEDS a nap" is a total cop-out and is very short-sighted. Yes, in the moment, given everything else that is going on, yes, in that moment he needs a nap. But if his naps were to be tweaked somewhat, he'd have an easier time falling asleep and staying asleep and would get the total number of hours that he needs. This isn't about making it easier for the daycare provider during the day or easier for the parent in the evenings, it's about making sure that the child is well rested and has a schedule that suits them. Maybe this means capping the nap, or skipping it every other day until a new routine is established. This unwillingness to work together with the parent and instead get very defensive and only think about how this change may affect the daycare provider is extremely disappointing and selfish on the part of the daycare provider. Enough so that I will be switching my daycare provider in the next month. Hopefully there are providers out there who really do care about the child's needs and not their daily "break".
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Leigh 08:14 AM 06-12-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My 4 yr old NEVER takes a nap when she is at home, but when she is at daycare she sleeps 1-2 hrs. I don't agree with the people who say she NEEDS the sleep, because guess what happens when she sleeps that long? She is up until 11 pm that night!! This happened yesterday/last night and as result she only got 8 hrs of sleep last night before having to wake up to go to daycare where she OF COURSE slept 2 hrs today because she was exhausted from not sleeping last night. So now, here I am as I type watching my wide awake chi,d quietly play with babies with not a tired bone in her body at 9:30 pm. Guess we're destined for a repeat tonight. Thanks, daycare.
Of course a 4 year old NEEDS the sleep. My child's doctor told me just last month that they NEED naps far longer than they are allowed to have them. That children should nap at LEAST through age 6.

I have a 4 year old daycare child whose parents tell me he doesn't sleep at home because of his naps here. The doctor says he guarantees it's because the child doesn't have a firm schedule at home. Guess what? The child does not have a firm schedule at home. Sometimes they don't serve dinner until 8:30 at night. Sometimes it is at 6. The child is sometimes put to bed at 9, sometimes at, and I am not joking, 12:30!

If a child's bedtime is SET IN STONE, if there is a regular routine and the children are put to bed and expected to stay there without watching TV or playing games, the kid will sleep at night.

I am not trying to criticize you, only letting you know that ALL 4-year olds NEED a nap. Of course, getting the child and the parent to agree is the issue.

I seriously recommend taking a good look at your routine. WHY is your child playing at 9:30? Your child should be in bed with the lights out-no toys. Don't blame the daycare, take a look at home first. If your child wasn't tired at daycare, your child would not nap-simple as that.
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Unregistered 08:17 AM 06-12-2013
As a provider it is not just about getting a 'break'. It is also not about just meeting the needs of one child. It is about meeting the needs of the group as a whole. In order to make sure the entire group gets the sleep they need, all children must have quiet time each day. Having one up and about disrupts the sleep of the others in care. My current group loves when their children are all well rested. In helps ensure that they have a pleasent evening from pick up until bedtime. They always know when nap was disrupted, as it effects the quality of the evening they have.
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Leigh 08:24 AM 06-12-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hmm, this is a little disappointing to hear. Especially the comment from the daycare provider about not working with the parent to tweak the nap schedule in order to assist the parents at night (except she was much more blunt in saying "I'm not going to change what I'm doing to make it easier on the parents during the evening!"). Obviously working parents need the support of daycare providers and the approach to child care should be partnered and lock-step. While I totally get that daycare providers need a break, what they fail to realize is that they can sometimes be putting their own needs above the needs of the child. As a parent who has a child in daycare, I completely understand the need for my daycare provider to get a break during the day and that this usually happens at nap time. What they may fail to understand is that every child is different. While my oldest napped daily until four years old and still went to bed and woke at a decent hour, my youngest needs much less sleep and his schedule needs to be tweaked to accommodate his developmental changes. When my youngest naps too long during the day, he ends up falling asleep much later that night, then waking during the night and waking very early. Because of this, he is missing sleep and then needs to catch up on that sleep during the day where he takes an even longer nap (which daycare is all too happy to allow) thus making he fall asleep even later and wake even later and on and on. It becomes a vicious cycle. I think that comment about "well if the child is sleeping then he NEEDS a nap" is a total cop-out and is very short-sighted. Yes, in the moment, given everything else that is going on, yes, in that moment he needs a nap. But if his naps were to be tweaked somewhat, he'd have an easier time falling asleep and staying asleep and would get the total number of hours that he needs. This isn't about making it easier for the daycare provider during the day or easier for the parent in the evenings, it's about making sure that the child is well rested and has a schedule that suits them. Maybe this means capping the nap, or skipping it every other day until a new routine is established. This unwillingness to work together with the parent and instead get very defensive and only think about how this change may affect the daycare provider is extremely disappointing and selfish on the part of the daycare provider. Enough so that I will be switching my daycare provider in the next month. Hopefully there are providers out there who really do care about the child's needs and not their daily "break".
The providers are not out to get their "daily break". They standardize nap time to benefit ALL of the children in their care, not just one of them. Naptime is standardized for ALL kids because it would be chaos to have parents dictate that this kid naps at 9, this one at 11, this one at 12:30, etc. They must all nap at the SAME time, or none of them are ABLE to nap. Believe me, this is exactly how it happens. Selfish is to expect your provider to change their entire program and how it has worked for years to accommodate your wants. Put your child to bed at bedtime, and your child will learn to sleep.
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craftymissbeth 09:11 AM 06-12-2013
Originally Posted by Leigh:
The providers are not out to get their "daily break". They standardize nap time to benefit ALL of the children in their care, not just one of them. Naptime is standardized for ALL kids because it would be chaos to have parents dictate that this kid naps at 9, this one at 11, this one at 12:30, etc. They must all nap at the SAME time, or none of them are ABLE to nap. Believe me, this is exactly how it happens. Selfish is to expect your provider to change their entire program and how it has worked for years to accommodate your wants. Put your child to bed at bedtime, and your child will learn to sleep.


Any parent that expects this ^ from their provider should consider a nanny instead. If you (general you) disagree that daycares should provide care that is beneficial to the group rather than the individual then a nanny is the best option IMO.
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Rockgirl 11:26 AM 06-12-2013
Personally, I wouldn't choose a provider who works 10-12 hour days with no break. As providers, we don't get the standard 15 minute breaks twice a day that most get in the workplace. Naptime is it. And we can't go meet a friend or run errands on our lunchbreak. I'm not saying these things to complain. Just pointing out that naptime is our only time to regroup. Why would a parent want to take that away, and as a result, have an overworked, exhausted caregiver for their child?
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e.j. 11:38 AM 06-12-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
As a provider it is not just about getting a 'break'. It is also not about just meeting the needs of one child. It is about meeting the needs of the group as a whole. In order to make sure the entire group gets the sleep they need, all children must have quiet time each day. Having one up and about disrupts the sleep of the others in care.
This exactly!
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JenNJ 11:53 AM 06-12-2013
I agree that kids all have different needs, but in reality it is about what the majority of kids in a group need. If 4/5 kids need to nap, then that one child being awake disrupts the others. I don't know ANY child who can remain quiet for 2+ hours per day unless they are asleep. So quiet activities aren't going to work.

My children are here each day and I require my own 4.5 year old to nap each day. She sleeps 3+ hours, my longest napper. Ans she is asleep each night at 8:30pm each night. She can stay up easily and skip nap, but its not what is best for the group of kids, so she must nap. During the summer when my school aged son is here, he must sleep or go outdoors during nap so he doesn't disturb the others. He isn't able to stay quiet that long every afternoon.

While I understand not all kids need naps or that not all parents want their child to nap, the choice is ultimately up to the parent. They can make that choice by finding a preschool, center, provider, family member or nanny who agrees not to have the child nap.
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AmyKidsCo 02:07 PM 06-12-2013
Different states have different regulations, I recommend you find out what your state's regulations are.

My naptime is 2 hours. Children who wake early and children who don't sleep can do quiet activities like look at books, and I have special "nap boxes" with small figures, puzzles, etc for them to do until nap time is over.
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Unregistered 07:24 PM 07-01-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I live in Australia and my 4 1/2 year old son is patted to sleep everyday - much to my disgust..... he is a very active boy and has lots of energy; if he doesnt sleep at day care he is asleep in bed at 7.30-8pm at night and sleeps for a good 12 hours.
I dont believe all centres should have the policy that all children are required to sleep (happy with a rest or quiet time) - its like a one size fits all policy for clothing and it doesnt work.
When my 4 1/2 year old is still awake and hard to settle at 10.30pm at night - then I beg to differ on the sleeping policy. As a parent of 2 children - one who is almost 9 and is constantly getting disturbed by his wide awake brother late at night - then having the difficulty to get them out of bed in the morning as they've had a late night - its a viscious , unhealthy cycle.
I certainly do not think it is rude, selfish or inconsiderate of parent to request for their child not to sleep and some comments in this forum have really hit a nerve. Parents know their children best. My son is at daycare 6-7 hours a day at most, 2 of those hours are sleeping times - which like I said before is encouraged by rocking, patting and soft music - I dont agree at all. Just to appease the lunch roster, get time to do dishes or aleviate staffing issues - surely that cannot be a good enough reason to disrupt the childs sleeping patterns in an evening, which on a regular basis has an effect on a much grander scale in a family.

I wonder when the day care centre closes its doors a the end of the day, that they have any thought for the turmutulous evening faced by a lot of parents whos child has had a lengthy sleep at kindy.
Then stay at home with your own kid and deal with them!!!!
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Unregistered 09:11 AM 07-02-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I live in Australia and my 4 1/2 year old son is patted to sleep everyday - much to my disgust..... he is a very active boy and has lots of energy; if he doesnt sleep at day care he is asleep in bed at 7.30-8pm at night and sleeps for a good 12 hours.
I dont believe all centres should have the policy that all children are required to sleep (happy with a rest or quiet time) - its like a one size fits all policy for clothing and it doesnt work.
When my 4 1/2 year old is still awake and hard to settle at 10.30pm at night - then I beg to differ on the sleeping policy. As a parent of 2 children - one who is almost 9 and is constantly getting disturbed by his wide awake brother late at night - then having the difficulty to get them out of bed in the morning as they've had a late night - its a viscious , unhealthy cycle.
I certainly do not think it is rude, selfish or inconsiderate of parent to request for their child not to sleep and some comments in this forum have really hit a nerve. Parents know their children best. My son is at daycare 6-7 hours a day at most, 2 of those hours are sleeping times - which like I said before is encouraged by rocking, patting and soft music - I dont agree at all. Just to appease the lunch roster, get time to do dishes or aleviate staffing issues - surely that cannot be a good enough reason to disrupt the childs sleeping patterns in an evening, which on a regular basis has an effect on a much grander scale in a family.

I wonder when the day care centre closes its doors a the end of the day, that they have any thought for the turmutulous evening faced by a lot of parents whos child has had a lengthy sleep at kindy.
Maybe you could offer you provider to pay for a daycare assistant that can take your son outside when everybody is sleeping. That would be a WIN-WIN situation for both the well being of the other children and to make your life easier. Or maybe with that amount you can hire a nanny so she can follow the specific schedule that you want for your son.
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Familycare71 11:13 AM 07-02-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hmm, this is a little disappointing to hear. Especially the comment from the daycare provider about not working with the parent to tweak the nap schedule in order to assist the parents at night (except she was much more blunt in saying "I'm not going to change what I'm doing to make it easier on the parents during the evening!"). Obviously working parents need the support of daycare providers and the approach to child care should be partnered and lock-step. While I totally get that daycare providers need a break, what they fail to realize is that they can sometimes be putting their own needs above the needs of the child. As a parent who has a child in daycare, I completely understand the need for my daycare provider to get a break during the day and that this usually happens at nap time. What they may fail to understand is that every child is different. While my oldest napped daily until four years old and still went to bed and woke at a decent hour, my youngest needs much less sleep and his schedule needs to be tweaked to accommodate his developmental changes. When my youngest naps too long during the day, he ends up falling asleep much later that night, then waking during the night and waking very early. Because of this, he is missing sleep and then needs to catch up on that sleep during the day where he takes an even longer nap (which daycare is all too happy to allow) thus making he fall asleep even later and wake even later and on and on. It becomes a vicious cycle. I think that comment about "well if the child is sleeping then he NEEDS a nap" is a total cop-out and is very short-sighted. Yes, in the moment, given everything else that is going on, yes, in that moment he needs a nap. But if his naps were to be tweaked somewhat, he'd have an easier time falling asleep and staying asleep and would get the total number of hours that he needs. This isn't about making it easier for the daycare provider during the day or easier for the parent in the evenings, it's about making sure that the child is well rested and has a schedule that suits them. Maybe this means capping the nap, or skipping it every other day until a new routine is established. This unwillingness to work together with the parent and instead get very defensive and only think about how this change may affect the daycare provider is extremely disappointing and selfish on the part of the daycare provider. Enough so that I will be switching my daycare provider in the next month. Hopefully there are providers out there who really do care about the child's needs and not their daily "break".
I'm assuming you are talking about my comment that was slightly misquoted ...
I do not force a child to nap. I also do not make them lay for hours so sleep from "boredom". When a child is laid down with books for a half an hour and falls asleep- IMO that child needs sleep.
I find it interesting you don't see providers complain: Gee I wish parents would keep their kids up at night so we could have longer nap times! I would find that a selfish statement! Instead I hear: the child isn't functioning, behaving or able to reach their maximum ability due to lack of rest. It is also the same children that seem to be ill often.
Yes- I enjoy nap time. Even when their are kids awake (because they no longer require a nap) because there is less going on and I can mentally recharge and get some things done too. I do not "force" kids to sleep (which I believe is impossible anyway) so I can have my break. I do schedule down time in my day for it however- I think it's good planing.
I work extremely closely with my families in the care of their children! The children are my main priority!! They also know with holding sleep is something I will not do..
And with all that said- I look forward to seeing you on here as a provider - if you can't beat 'em join 'em - is how the saying goes! Good luck with out the quiet time!
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Familycare71 11:18 AM 07-02-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Then stay at home with your own kid and deal with them!!!!


Right!?! Or hire a nanny!!!! Ugh!!!
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Leanna 03:18 PM 07-02-2013
Parents: When you comment that your children never nap at home but sleep at child care because they are lulled to (or forced or bored or whatever the situation is), please remember that a day at child care is NOT equivalent to a day at home. At home they sleep in instead of getting up early and getting ready to go to child care. At home they are most relaxed and are watching tv, relaxing, etc. At child care they are busy ALL DAY. They are playing, interacting with the provider, playing outdoors, doing activities, etc. (I am not implying parents don't do these things with their children but it is a different level at child care). PLUS at child care they are constantly surrounded by peers and that is a lot of stimulation in and of itself. A day at child care is much more busy and tiring than a day at home. It is very possible that they are more in need of a nap on child care days.
Our state requires that we provide a rest period for every child. It also says that rest times cannot be excessive and that provisions must be made for children who cannot sleep. In my program, the all of the children are required to lay down for the first thirty minutes. Even those that don't nap need this quiet time to relax their bodies and minds. It also gives me time to get the other children to sleep. After the first half and hour anyone who is till awake get a small tote of quiet toys & materials to play with. They are expected to stay on or near their cots and not to disturb the other children. Also, they are expected to play alone at this time.
This policy works well for me. I think it strikes a good balance.
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Unregistered 03:03 PM 07-03-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Parents know their children best.
Pfft......really? You know them best? The majority of children in daycare spend at least 40 WAKING hours a week in the care of the provider. If you do the math that is more awake time than with any other caretaker - parents included. Most kids are lucky to spend 4 waking hours a weekday with their parents. Add in the time they spend with grandparents or teenage babysitters on the weekends and yes, it is unequivocably a fact that most kids in daycare actually have a DAYCARE PROVIDER who knows them best.

Sorry, but just because you gave birth to someone does NOT mean you know them best. Besides, daycare providers KNOW children. The average daycare provider, if having provided care for only five years, with five children in care (on average) has over 65,000 WAKING hours of experience caring for children. Find me ANY parent who can claim that who has a toddler. And parents think they "know their child the best". No, isn't so. Parents just don't want to hear the cold, hard truth........getting your child to bed at night isn't about lack of fatigue - it's about LACK OF PARENTING.

Now, be a parent and do what you need to do to get your child to bed and stop making your dcprovider the scapegoat for your inadequacies as a parent.
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MissAnn 03:26 PM 07-03-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Pfft......really? You know them best? The majority of children in daycare spend at least 40 WAKING hours a week in the care of the provider. If you do the math that is more awake time than with any other caretaker - parents included. Most kids are lucky to spend 4 waking hours a weekday with their parents. Add in the time they spend with grandparents or teenage babysitters on the weekends and yes, it is unequivocably a fact that most kids in daycare actually have a DAYCARE PROVIDER who knows them best.

Sorry, but just because you gave birth to someone does NOT mean you know them best. Besides, daycare providers KNOW children. The average daycare provider, if having provided care for only five years, with five children in care (on average) has over 65,000 WAKING hours of experience caring for children. Find me ANY parent who can claim that who has a toddler. And parents think they "know their child the best". No, isn't so. Parents just don't want to hear the cold, hard truth........getting your child to bed at night isn't about lack of fatigue - it's about LACK OF PARENTING.

Now, be a parent and do what you need to do to get your child to bed and stop making your dcprovider the scapegoat for your inadequacies as a parent.
This thread is old and you are trying to stir up some drama.
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Unregistered 06:24 PM 07-03-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Pfft......really? You know them best? The majority of children in daycare spend at least 40 WAKING hours a week in the care of the provider. If you do the math that is more awake time than with any other caretaker - parents included. Most kids are lucky to spend 4 waking hours a weekday with their parents. Add in the time they spend with grandparents or teenage babysitters on the weekends and yes, it is unequivocably a fact that most kids in daycare actually have a DAYCARE PROVIDER who knows them best.

Sorry, but just because you gave birth to someone does NOT mean you know them best. Besides, daycare providers KNOW children. The average daycare provider, if having provided care for only five years, with five children in care (on average) has over 65,000 WAKING hours of experience caring for children. Find me ANY parent who can claim that who has a toddler. And parents think they "know their child the best". No, isn't so. Parents just don't want to hear the cold, hard truth........getting your child to bed at night isn't about lack of fatigue - it's about LACK OF PARENTING.

Now, be a parent and do what you need to do to get your child to bed and stop making your dcprovider the scapegoat for your inadequacies as a parent.
Ha! So true! I only had a provider TWO days per week for 3 hours per day when I went to work. She had (at the time) 27 years experience. I was a second time mom to my first boy and my first VERY VERY sick child. He went to daycare that morning fine, played,and suddenly became very fussy, unlike himself, not wanting to nap, nothing. He was 3 months old so we KNEW that this is not normal. She calls me and I was there within the 1/2 hour and my son was blue and burning up. She said "He needs an ER now, I think it could be RSV, I was about to call an ambulance, but he is crying" So 2 minutes down the road I take him to the ER, and she hit the nail RIGHT on the head! My son was hospitalized with RSV!

This woman, while she wasn't around MY Child every single day, she knew enough about children, illnesses, etc and had enough experience that me, the newer mom didn't have, and she saved my son's life.

I would NEVER dis-count anything a good provider tells me about my children with an attitude of I know my kid best and shoop on them! Never.
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Cradle2crayons 06:37 PM 07-03-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Ha! So true! I only had a provider TWO days per week for 3 hours per day when I went to work. She had (at the time) 27 years experience. I was a second time mom to my first boy and my first VERY VERY sick child. He went to daycare that morning fine, played,and suddenly became very fussy, unlike himself, not wanting to nap, nothing. He was 3 months old so we KNEW that this is not normal. She calls me and I was there within the 1/2 hour and my son was blue and burning up. She said "He needs an ER now, I think it could be RSV, I was about to call an ambulance, but he is crying" So 2 minutes down the road I take him to the ER, and she hit the nail RIGHT on the head! My son was hospitalized with RSV!

This woman, while she wasn't around MY Child every single day, she knew enough about children, illnesses, etc and had enough experience that me, the newer mom didn't have, and she saved my son's life.

I would NEVER dis-count anything a good provider tells me about my children with an attitude of I know my kid best and shoop on them! Never.
As a provider, I'd love to have more parents like you!!

My parents are great and even the young mom of three looks to me for advice. When I tell her something, she takes it serious.

My mom of the special needs baby is exactly the same. She takes me seriously. And even asked me several months ago, one month into caring for her daughter, if I would mind goi to a few doctor appointments with her to help her understand what the doc was saying and to help her tell the doctor all the things I knew about her baby. That made me feel really good.
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Unregistered 07:13 PM 07-03-2013
Originally Posted by Cradle2crayons:
As a provider, I'd love to have more parents like you!!

My parents are great and even the young mom of three looks to me for advice. When I tell her something, she takes it serious.

My mom of the special needs baby is exactly the same. She takes me seriously. And even asked me several months ago, one month into caring for her daughter, if I would mind goi to a few doctor appointments with her to help her understand what the doc was saying and to help her tell the doctor all the things I knew about her baby. That made me feel really good.
Aww! That's awesome and how it should be! It takes a village, it really does.

The DCP I posted about is wonderful and she STILL takes my kids on a drop in basis. They love her!
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Unregistered 04:57 AM 07-23-2013
90 min to 2 hours in normal. And visiting at nap time is not acceptable. It disrupts not only your child's routine, but that of the other children. Some children wont sleep at night, if they miss their afternoon nap, because their over tired. I have a new parent that dosent want their toddler to nap. Schudule was clearly explained at interview and parent explained their child nornally napped for 2 hours. However the child is staying up past bedtime and the parent figures taking away nap at my house will solve the problem. FLASH! you cant force a child to stay awake either. Better to nap eariler in the afternoon on routine, then force them to stay awake and have them fall to sleep in the late afternoon. Children need 12 to 14 hours of sleep.
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Jack Sprat 05:27 AM 07-23-2013
We nap everyday from 1:30 - 3:30 ( or whenever the kids wake). This is for everyone 5 and under. If the children fall asleep then great. After 30 minutes of quite they can read books, color, etc. If a child falls asleep then imo they need sleep. I have had one parent request her son not be allowed to sleep. Well, he is falling asleep 4 out of 5 days and still going to bed at his normal 10:00 time at home. We are busy and active and their little bodies need rest. Even my 11 yr old will take a nap. As kids enter puberty they need more rest as well.
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Unregistered 03:36 PM 07-23-2013
Laundrymom here. Don't know why I can't log in. BUT
My advice.
For parents who have trouble getting their children to bed at night when they take a nap at daycare. Get them up three hours earlier in the morning. They'll be plenty tired by the time evening rolls around. More time with your child is more important than a few hours of beauty sleep. At least that's how I've done it for 26 years with my own children so I got to spend extra time with just them before the daycare children arrived.
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Unregistered 12:21 PM 08-20-2013
I am completely shocked that so many people think that if a kid happens to fall asleep while being forced to lie down and stay quiet for 2 hours, he/she MUST need a nap. WRONG. I have 4 1/2 year old triplets who have always woken up on their own between 5:30 and 7am. I can count on one hand the number of times they have slept past 8:00 in their lives. Even when they don't fall asleep until midnight, they wake up by 6-7am. So Laundrymom's idea about waking them up 3 hours earlier? Ummmm...you want me to wake my kids up at 3:30am? Horrible advice.

On daycare days, my kids are up at 6:30am. Their school puts them down at noon for a 2-hour nap that turns into a 3-hour nap. They often don't fall asleep until the 1:30-2:00 mark, and they let them sleep until they wake up. Then at 3:30 they give them a nice sugary snack. So is it any wonder why my kids aren't ready for bed by 7-8 at night??? Why is it that during the summers they can fall asleep by 7-8pm and wake up at 7am and go through the entire day without a nap, but during the school year, they suddenly NEED a 2 hour nap and only sleep from 11pm-6:30am? They literally lie in bed awake for hours before falling asleep around 11pm, 1-2 hours after MY bedtime. It's actually unhealthy for a toddler to sleep to regularly sleep so little at night. They need a good, long stretch of sleep at night much more than a nap during the day.

And, honestly, I couldn't care less that the teachers need a break and quiet time during the day. That's a piss poor excuse to force my kid to lie down quietly for a 2-hour stretch. Child care centers and preschools should provide enough coverage to allow their teachers to take official lunches and breaks - my children shouldn't have to be forced to sit on a cot to accommodate such a break schedule.
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Blackcat31 12:44 PM 08-20-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I am completely shocked that so many people think that if a kid happens to fall asleep while being forced to lie down and stay quiet for 2 hours, he/she MUST need a nap. WRONG. I have 4 1/2 year old triplets who have always woken up on their own between 5:30 and 7am. I can count on one hand the number of times they have slept past 8:00 in their lives. Even when they don't fall asleep until midnight, they wake up by 6-7am. So Laundrymom's idea about waking them up 3 hours earlier? Ummmm...you want me to wake my kids up at 3:30am? Horrible advice.

On daycare days, my kids are up at 6:30am. Their school puts them down at noon for a 2-hour nap that turns into a 3-hour nap. They often don't fall asleep until the 1:30-2:00 mark, and they let them sleep until they wake up. Then at 3:30 they give them a nice sugary snack. So is it any wonder why my kids aren't ready for bed by 7-8 at night??? Why is it that during the summers they can fall asleep by 7-8pm and wake up at 7am and go through the entire day without a nap, but during the school year, they suddenly NEED a 2 hour nap and only sleep from 11pm-6:30am? They literally lie in bed awake for hours before falling asleep around 11pm, 1-2 hours after MY bedtime. It's actually unhealthy for a toddler to sleep to regularly sleep so little at night. They need a good, long stretch of sleep at night much more than a nap during the day.

And, honestly, I couldn't care less that the teachers need a break and quiet time during the day. That's a piss poor excuse to force my kid to lie down quietly for a 2-hour stretch. Child care centers and preschools should provide enough coverage to allow their teachers to take official lunches and breaks - my children shouldn't have to be forced to sit on a cot to accommodate such a break schedule.
If you KNOW your children do not require a daytime nap, why would you enroll them in a program that gives them a nap then?

There are LOTS of providers that don't require kids to nap/rest and there are also providers who are required by the state to give children in their care a rest or nap time.

NOT all facilities operate the same way, which is why it is extremely important that you, as a parent do YOUR job and find a provider that meets YOUR family's needs.

If I knew my child did not require a nap and the facility I had them enrolled in made them take one, I'd be finding a new daycare.

Providers do what works for them and parents need to do what works for them.

Seems like an easy solution to me.
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SilverSabre25 07:04 AM 08-21-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:

And, honestly, I couldn't care less that the teachers need a break and quiet time during the day. That's a piss poor excuse to force my kid to lie down quietly for a 2-hour stretch. Child care centers and preschools should provide enough coverage to allow their teachers to take official lunches and breaks - my children shouldn't have to be forced to sit on a cot to accommodate such a break schedule.
That costs more. Are you a parent who is willing to pay the extra cost? Most aren't. And if you are, I recommend checking into a nanny or other type of caregiver who can provide the nap-less schedule...but you'll still have to pay for it.
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MyAngels 08:22 AM 08-21-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I am completely shocked that so many people think that if a kid happens to fall asleep while being forced to lie down and stay quiet for 2 hours, he/she MUST need a nap. WRONG. I have 4 1/2 year old triplets who have always woken up on their own between 5:30 and 7am. I can count on one hand the number of times they have slept past 8:00 in their lives. Even when they don't fall asleep until midnight, they wake up by 6-7am. So Laundrymom's idea about waking them up 3 hours earlier? Ummmm...you want me to wake my kids up at 3:30am? Horrible advice.

On daycare days, my kids are up at 6:30am. Their school puts them down at noon for a 2-hour nap that turns into a 3-hour nap. They often don't fall asleep until the 1:30-2:00 mark, and they let them sleep until they wake up. Then at 3:30 they give them a nice sugary snack. So is it any wonder why my kids aren't ready for bed by 7-8 at night??? Why is it that during the summers they can fall asleep by 7-8pm and wake up at 7am and go through the entire day without a nap, but during the school year, they suddenly NEED a 2 hour nap and only sleep from 11pm-6:30am? They literally lie in bed awake for hours before falling asleep around 11pm, 1-2 hours after MY bedtime. It's actually unhealthy for a toddler to sleep to regularly sleep so little at night. They need a good, long stretch of sleep at night much more than a nap during the day.

And, honestly, I couldn't care less that the teachers need a break and quiet time during the day. That's a piss poor excuse to force my kid to lie down quietly for a 2-hour stretch. Child care centers and preschools should provide enough coverage to allow their teachers to take official lunches and breaks - my children shouldn't have to be forced to sit on a cot to accommodate such a break schedule.
I agree with BC - why haven't you moved your children to a program that meets your needs? You are in charge of making decisions that are best for your kids, and it doesn't seem like you're doing that in this case.
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Unregistered 11:45 AM 08-22-2013
I just stumbled across this post and figured I would add to it. At my current Center we have different nap times for different ages. I'm with 3 year olds and they have nap scheduled from 11:30-1:30. Does that work? No. Do we all take our lunches during that time? No. The other day I arrived at work before 7 and was given a break 2:30-3:30. That hour is the ONLY time during the day I can sit down. We're not allowed to sit outside, can't have a desk to sit at while the kids are working at the table (and my group never even does that anyway) and maybe possibly sit during circle time (again these kids won't sit at all so I'm standing 9 hours out of 10 working ones with no second of rest. I have no assistant to help with anything,
If kids need to go to the bathroom we have to wait until everyone is ready (some arrive late and are still eating at 8:30 while others ate at 7:30 and need to go potty). After nap we have to wait until everyone is awake so we can go as a group. Even in there it's a constant go because of everything they are doing. At lunch we eat in the gym/cafeteria and are serving them and they always want more something. These kids kick me and scream at me and throw things at me. They tell me no and hey don't have to. Today I felt horrible but went to work anyway because I know we're short staffed. The director said she'd let me leave if she could find someone. Parents asked if I felt ok. Kids were asking. It wasn't until I nearly passed out on the playground that I was finally sent home. I can barely talk my throat is bright red and one teacher said she thinks I have strep throat. I had fever and feel awful. After getting home and being able to put my feet up I felt better. Now this isn't supposed to be a pity post. I'm just saying that many times we feel we have no choice but to be there because there is no one to cover us. Same as how sometimes we just need a moment to rest. I've heard so many parents say it can't be that hard - I have a 3 year old - but do they have 14-15? I live in Texas and the law states that I can have 15 by myself. At 4 years it's 18:1 ratio. I don't care who you are but that's a lot to handle. By nap time I need a moment. And so do the kids. By 10 they're all crying and cranky. If they don't nap they start falling asleep during centres around 4 or 5. I've had several who sit down start crying and screaming and fall asleep. During the nap time that is our prep time. To do our room newsletters lesson plans and any other prep. No sitting down or having a moment to relax. I understand parents needs but at the same time they need to understand exactly what we do during the day.
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Unregistered 09:08 PM 09-05-2013
Interesting post. I have the opposite problemt. I agree you need to have a strong bedtime routine. Stick to it. My son challenges it every once in a while. Those days he does i just put him back in bed until he understands this is how it is. It is exhausting but so worth it in the long run. I think he challenges me as he develops. He is two and goes to sleep every day at the same time. I have the opposite problem. My daycare provider complains he only naps for 45ylmin to an hour. At home on the. Weekend he naps 2 to hours. I think its too exciting for him over there. I feel like he is catching up from his long week. I wish he napped longer during the week so he wouldn't be as tired on the weekend an i could do more with him. He is in day care six hours a day
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kimmills 11:30 PM 09-05-2013
I agree with what others have said here. It's a standard requirement of 2 hr nap time and nothing that day care centers can do about it. Also most day cares wouldn't take your arriving unannounced too lightly.
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Unregistered 09:27 PM 02-10-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Because a child takes a nap at daycare, has nothing to do with a child not going to sleep at night. It is nothing but a blame game by the parents. Be a parent, not their best buddy and parent your child. So many times over the years, I have been confronted with...Please don't let Susie sleep more than 45 min, she doesn't go to sleep at night. I do nothing different, Susie still sleeps 2 to 2.5 hours per day, BUT I tell parents she only slept 45 min and amazingly her sleep issues have subsided. No change in sleep at daycare and a little white lie to parent, works everytime. lol

And special requests to keep Susie up, when you are a one person team with 1 daycare space in your home, it is very hard to allow 1 child to stay up while the others sleep. It just doesn't work. 1 kid stays up then you have 2 wanting to stay up. Nope, not going to happen. Most home daycares are small group care. If you want special you need to hire a nanny for one on one care. A provider has to do what is best for her and her group, not 1 individual child.

I never understood why parents would put their kids to bed at 7:30/8, don't they want to spend time with their kids? My own kids never slept 12 hours at a time and they were in daycare for 8 years, went to bed at 9pm and up at 5:30, napped everyday till went to school. Sometimes parents need to step back and regroup and ask themselves if their request to their provider is doable in a group setting.
Really?? You sound like you have it all figured out and that you are able to judge as a result of your vast wisdom. It may come as a surprise to you, with such insight as you have, to find out that people are different. Dont you dare judge a parent, with your sanctimonious diatribe, who struggles to get their kid to sleep at night when they nap. I myself could not handle a nap after the age of 2 and still sleep at night. My first daughter stopped napping at 2 and a half and if she inadvertently dozed off in the car, we were lucky to get her to fall asleep before 11pm. Of course, according to your wisdom, that is a result of our poor parenting.

Grow up please and stop acting like you know it all. You dont seem to have the foggiest idea of the nuances involved here. Make your opinion but keep your judgments to yourself!
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Unregistered 10:07 AM 02-11-2014
Here's some information regarding children and the suggested amount of sleep that they need.

http://www.sleepfoundation.org/artic...dren-and-sleep
http://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about_sleep/how_much_sleep.htm
http://www.mayoclinic.org/how-many-h...s/faq-20057898
http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/heal...hy.aspx?item=1
http://kidshealth.org/kid/stay_healt...not_tired.html


Don't underestimate the suggested sleep guidelines. They are there for a reason. Sleep is at the center of health and development, especially for children.
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ColorfulSunburst 01:32 PM 02-11-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Really?? You sound like you have it all figured out and that you are able to judge as a result of your vast wisdom. It may come as a surprise to you, with such insight as you have, to find out that people are different. Dont you dare judge a parent, with your sanctimonious diatribe, who struggles to get their kid to sleep at night when they nap. I myself could not handle a nap after the age of 2 and still sleep at night. My first daughter stopped napping at 2 and a half and if she inadvertently dozed off in the car, we were lucky to get her to fall asleep before 11pm. Of course, according to your wisdom, that is a result of our poor parenting.

Grow up please and stop acting like you know it all. You dont seem to have the foggiest idea of the nuances involved here. Make your opinion but keep your judgments to yourself!
calm down.
Parents have no any rights to change any daycare schedule. If a child can not be in the schedule he has to leave the daycare but not trying to change the schedule.
ex.: I like to sleep in the morning till 11am but my boss has no wishes change my work schedule so i have to wake up at 6am or retire.
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craftymissbeth 01:41 PM 02-11-2014
This is the thread that will not end... yes, it goes on and on my friend...
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cara041083 02:06 PM 02-11-2014
In my daycare the kids nap from 12-2 and once they don't nap any more then they have quit time from 12-2. If they fall asleep then they sleep other wise they watch a movie or read a book
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SunshineMama 11:54 AM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by SomeSimpleGuy:
My daycare is forcing my 6 and 3 year old children to nap for over 2 hours!

First , is this even legal?

Does anyone , anywhere make there children nap for that long?

Sometimes , I know they nap there for over 2 hours.

My wife doesn't seem to believe me, but I stop in unannounced , and am frequently dissapointed.

I think a 45 min to 1 hour nap is more than standard?

Please help me

Thank you in advance
What do you mean by forcing? Are they holding your children down until they fall asleep?

All of my daycare kids, and my own children, nap for about 2 or more hours (and my own kids sleep about 11 hours at night as well). Kids play hard at daycare, and need rest for their bodies and minds to grow. A 2 hour nap, or even more, isn't abnormal at all, in fact, it is the standard. If your children are falling asleep, that means that their body needs it. If they weren't tired, they wouldn't be falling asleep. My kids would be super crabs if they only napped 45 minutes to an hour. Naps make happier, healthier kids.

I do not, however, have my kids over 5 nap. Is your 6 year old sleeping for the entire 2 hours? Maybe they could read a book, or do another quiet activity? My 5 year old daughter does not nap, but she sleeps 12 hours at night.
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Unregistered 05:59 AM 02-15-2014
At my daycare we are scheduled for a 2-2 1/2 nap time and whoever doesnt want to sleep doesnt have to but they still have to rest even if its just for a little bit, specially the little ones, since it helps their development. I was also thinking, shouldnt the 6 year old be in kindergarten? And if he/she is in fact going, even if it's half day, don't you think he/she be tired from playing pretty much the whole morning? Usually if the kids are not tired they won't sleep so there's not really a way to 'force' them. However, I do wake them up after a max of 2 1/2 hours because then it can get tricky for parents to get them to bed early at night and I believe daycare is a provider/parent teamwork and I know that parents get home tired too and the last thing they want is having their child running around the house at 10 o'clock at night.
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grateday 04:35 PM 02-17-2014
Although there is a routine, who actually sleeps week to week varies.
There are many reasons why kids don't sleep:
Stimulated by other children in the room
Stimulated by the room and what is in it-sound/light/heat/texture
Wanting to play and seeking stimulation and would rather not sleep
If its Monday and they are coming in from a different weekend routine at home
If they are older than 3 sometimes it is more difficult
If they did or did not sleep the night before, if they did not nap the day before
If there is no routine at home or differs greatly from your own
If they are naturally irregular sleepers
If they naturally require less sleep than another child
Varies on the individual need of the child
The crasher kids that the only time they sleep is when they crash out of exhaustion (No one's fault)--Kids that have a lack of ability to feel sleepy
Also, if there is a new child in care or if the child is not regularly in care can effect the kids napping
Lack of physical activity earlier in the day or stimulating activity
Too many interruptions in routine of a day
Kids picking up on stress and purposefully acting up because any attention is better than no attention
Nutrition Nutrition Nutrition- Sugar, caffeine, highly preserved/processed foods, food additives, artificial colors, lack of variety in diet and nutrition. Being hungry or thirsty and not having that need met prior to nap
(None of these things are to say that something is someones fault, just things to investigate as a parent and provider)
Lack of comfort in the environment- this includes whether the child feels loved and accepted in the daycare



Effect of kiddos starting the nap at 3pm
***Can cause a late going to bed time but not always because it depends on the needs and what is going on with that individual child

Effect of kids state of mind not resting at all in my childcare:
***Short fused children-less able to deal with one another
This is in the form of crying, yelling, hitting. They become so tired they cannot use proper social skills with one another. They can get more clumsy and fall more often because they are paying attention less. Finally, they are less able to follow any sort of rules or really pay attention to any sort of activity or teaching.

This is a safety risk because:
-They can hurt each other
-Get hurt

This can cause a major stress in the childcare if children are not in sync and able to focus. It can lead the provider to make decisions about whether or not a child should be in there care.

Should a provider force a kid to take a nap? No
Should the parents work with the provider? Yes. Yes. Yes.......I am not saying providers are perfect parents and they always do things just so with there own kids or that other children's parents should listen to a daycare provider but there should be some agreement and some sort of meeting the daycare in the middle somewhere or it just is not a good fit for your setting. Some parents and providers are very my way or no way. It really is a team effort for the parents, provider, and all of the children. It is not a mistake but a constant learning experience, always question what is ethical and right and how it can be improved. It can work but we have to make it work together.

Says the provider who's kid crashed on a Monday at 5pm because of many of the reasons above=)

I have had rigid parents here but they usually had been through a few childcare's and have an older child. I have had disagreements with more rigid parents. I have had disagreements with other parents and I like that they are open enough to speak with me and I with them. Rigid first time parents don't usually like my style from the get go and just go straight to a center or struggle to find care.

Rigid parents want everything just a certain way for there child with disregard for you, disregard for other children in your care. They want more than what you can provide. I look at it as though the children should all have the same level of care. If they have an allergy or disability - I work on that but above all they are all getting the same level of care. It is not fair and children know when someone is treated different and then they all want what the other has.
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Unregistered 09:24 AM 02-27-2014
My provider whom I have been with since my oldest was 1 and is now a kindergartner and currently my 4 year old child goes too makes my 6 year old lie down with the group if he needs care for a day that school is out. I have asked my provider if he can stay up during nap time and do a quiet activity as he is very able to do so and she said he has to 'nap/lie down' with the rest of them because she doesn't have a spot for him and doesn't have a helper to be with him. I don't know, I am totally fine with my 4 year old napping as it's the schedule and it's never been a problem, but I just don't see why she would make a kindergartner who is used to a full day program at school lie down. He hates it. I am just curious what other people's take on it is.
I am very thankful for my provider as I have been with her for so long, but I don't see the rationale.
Thanks.
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Unregistered 10:36 AM 02-27-2014
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.
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JoseyJo 07:25 PM 02-27-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.
Some states require that all children lay down for a quiet time each day. Kansas does. My surveyor said that every child in care, regardless of age, must lay down for a minimum of 30 minutes. If the child is still awake after that time then another quiet activity can be given to them, such as reading books quietly on their mats. If the child falls asleep within that time frame we are not supposed to wake them up.
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Patches 07:31 PM 02-27-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.
Does he fall asleep? My son is also 6 and in full day kindergarten and on weekends and no school days he naps. He doesn't want to all the time, but onc ehe lays down, he's out. He obviously needs the sleep .
If your son falls asleep, I wouldn't worry about it. If he doesn't, maybe he could look st books on his cot as long as hes quiet (and as long as your provider is ok with that). Sorry, I really don't see this as that big of a deal.
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blandino 09:38 PM 02-27-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.
I understand both sides. As a provider, allowing a child to have "quiet time" instead of nap, still means a good deal of attention and responsibility. During nap time, I need to do dishes, finish cleaning up from lunch, reply to e-mails, and have a lunch break for myself. Any time I have agreed to let a child have "quiet time" they have needed me multiple times during that time. That is my only quiet time/lunch break/bathroom break of the day, plus I still have work responsibilities to get done. Plus, the child usually makes some sort of noise to wake the others. I really count on having that quiet time each day. I allow all my kids to bring books to their mats and read them while falling asleep or when they wake up. At 6.5, your son is probably reading a little ? He could have a longer book to read each day, while laying down.
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Unregistered 10:50 PM 02-27-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.

Even adults need naps
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nannyde 09:18 AM 02-28-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.
An awake kid is a kid that needs direct physical care and supervision. Doesn't matter if he is awake and quiet or awake and running house. Awake means up and up means no break.

Just switch him to another program. He has outgrown nap and your provider requires that all kids in her care have nap. It's not personal.
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Play Care 10:54 AM 02-28-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been with my provider for 5 years, my oldest is in Kindergarten and my youngest is 4 and goes daily. In times where my oldest doesn't have school I have to take him there and she requires him to lay down. I recently asked if he could stay up and just do quiet time as he is perfectly able being he is in all day Kindergarten. She said she doesn't have a place for him to do just that. He hates lying down with the little kids and I just don't really agree with it. I am all for naps don't get me wrong, but for a 6 1/2 year old, I am a bit disappointed by her response and am just curious what other providers think about this.
I appreciate your input.
I agree with Nannyde. I would look specifically for a school aged program that doesn't have naps/quiet time. Your provider has told you what she can offer, so now you have to decide where to go from there.
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Unregistered 08:29 PM 03-02-2014
Sleeping children don't need supervision ? I work in a center and we would be fired if we walked out of the room while the children were sleeping, we also have to be in ratio the entire time. How is it ok to leave sleeping children alone in a room because you are a home provider ?
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Cradle2crayons 09:05 PM 03-02-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Sleeping children don't need supervision ? I work in a center and we would be fired if we walked out of the room while the children were sleeping, we also have to be in ratio the entire time. How is it ok to leave sleeping children alone in a room because you are a home provider ?
Maybe because SOME states don't require that children are under constant visual supervision while sleeping ?

I have an infant asleep in one room... His special needs sister asleep in another room because it's medically necessary, and two more kids asleep on a mat in another room. I am not required to be in the room while they are napping. I have live video on the special needs child as well as he two sisters asleep in their nap room. I also have an 11 year old and my own five year olds in their room and an awake daycare boy age 6 in my sons room for quiet play time during nap time.

I guess I should split myself in five pieces and maybe that would work?? Lol

Some family home providers don't have to have visual supervision during naps. Some don't even have to have visual supervision while they are awake. Some rules say "sight or sound" some say both...

Oh and flame me now.. I provide late night and overnight care also... And I'm asleep after x time.
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blandino 11:39 PM 03-02-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Sleeping children don't need supervision ? I work in a center and we would be fired if we walked out of the room while the children were sleeping, we also have to be in ratio the entire time. How is it ok to leave sleeping children alone in a room because you are a home provider ?
In my state, centers have to remain in the same room when children are asleep ,and homes don't. I would assume that it has to do with the setup. In a center, if you leave the room, you are closing the door and chances are walking down a hallway to another room. In a home daycare, you are probably leaving the room the kids are in, but can still hear/see the room that the kids are in. We are required to be within sight OR sound of the children, so as long as we can hear them it is oaky. Some states require that they must be in sight. But I don't think a home provider should have to stay in the living room, if the kids are sleeping in there. Going into a kitchen or a bedroom with an open door, isn't going to be an issue, if the rooms are within hearing distance.
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Unregistered 01:52 PM 03-04-2014
Thank you to all for your responses. He doesn't go very often, so I am not sure if he falls asleep every time. I am thinking this summer when we need care I will put him in a school age program for part of the time so he gets a variety of care and activity.
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Unregistered 09:41 AM 10-15-2014
I'm a HUGE sleep advocate and if you read anything regarding children and how their brain develops you would understand that toddlers and babies need to sleep a lot! And from what science says- no your child does not stay up until 11pm because they nap during the day. There's another reason for that and it's up to the parent to figure that out.
My daughter napped 2-3 times a day up to a year for one to two hours each nap and still went to bed at 7/7:30pm.
After a year it was only 1-2 naps and still a early bed time of 6/6:30 pm.
After two just one nap and still an early bedtime of 6/6:30
She's more seven and should be in bed by 7/7:30 but our days are long with homework so it's usually 8pm. Weekends the child will still asleep until 10 if she's tired. But we usually have to wake get up.
Sleep is HUGE!!! your child's brain is developing and it needs proper time to rest. It's not about what is convenient for you.

Read any Weissbluth book on sleep. He's a doctor not a pediatrician or a pop psych parenting author.

Do research before you blame your provider for forcing your child to nap. She's probably giving your child a huge favor developmentally speaking.
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Unregistered 10:11 AM 10-15-2014
I can't get over some of these ignorant parent responses!! Their children don't need the required about of sleep for children their age that had been studied over and over by SCIENTISTS and SLEEP SPECIALISTS. their child is "special"
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Unregistered 09:54 AM 11-19-2014
I don't understand most of the posts here. People that cite to the CDC website and the Healthy Sleep Habits book (which I LOVE, by the way) are completely contradicting themselves. The original question was about a 3 and 6 year old being required to nap 2 hours. People say that is fine and required by childcare centers (in CA it is not that long). Do the math. The CDC says school age children need at least 10 hours of sleep. My 6 year old sleeps 8 to 6:30-7 every night. That is 10.5 hours. It is absurd to make him take a 2 hour nap! He is also in 1st grade so I don't know how they would fit in the state mandates requirements if he took two hours to nap. Preschool age children per CDC website need 11-12 hours. My 3 year old sleep 7:30 pm-6:30 am. He may need a short nap but I would be so angry if a preschool was making him nap 2 hours. Do the math people if a preschool is making your kid sleep 2 hours and they are preschool age that means then need 9-10 of night time sleep. So parents who say napping makes their kids stay up too late are not just full of it or disrespecting their kids sleep. Their child is probably find sleeping 9-6. It makes sense for working parents whose children have to get up super early or are picked up late and can't get to bed early, to have naps. But for other children who are getting plenty of sleep at night, they don't need a 2 hour nap.

Most people here that are defending the 2 hour day care nap work in the industry. In my opinion they just want a break and to save money because licensing allows them to drop the ratio of teachers to students during nap time.
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Play Care 01:18 PM 11-19-2014
Originally Posted by :
Most people here that are defending the 2 hour day care nap work in the industry. In my opinion they just want a break and to save money because licensing allows them to drop the ratio of teachers to students during nap time.
I won't speak to anything else, because that horse is dead But I want to make it clear that in my state, as well as many others, ratios do NOT change simply because children are sleeping. Our Licensing body was *very* clear about that. Furthermore, many states require staff to stay in the room with napping children or physically check on them every so many minutes. For most providers, gone are the days when nap time was an actual "break."
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Unregistered 10:15 AM 12-20-2014
What many child care centres fail to realise is that you cannot force a child to sleep at night if they are not tired. You can have all the bedtime routines in the world, soft music, mummy lying there, it wont work if your child is not tired because they had a long afternoon nap. It is common sense.
What they also fail to realise is that a child going to bed late at night is not only difficult for parents, but it means the child GETS LESS SLEEP. The child wakes at 5.30am as per their normal body clock, gets a total of 7 or 8 hours sleep and is sleep deprived, irritable, uncooperative, difficult and unhappy. The child suffers. The child is not getting enough sleep.

I have read a lot on this thread about 'the child needs to nap' 'the child must need the sleep' but timing that sleep so that the child is able to receive a good 12 hours within every 24 hours, is very important.
My child naps at daycare, she then doesnt get enough sleep at night, we call the following day 'disabled day' - I know my child better than my left hand. I have a bedtime routine that works very well when she doesn't nap during the day. Why would she go to sleep at night if she is not tired?? she doesn't and either would I.
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SignMeUp 10:33 AM 12-20-2014
Then, conversely, you cannot force a child to sleep at nap time if they are not tired. Why would they go to sleep at nap time if they are not tired??
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daycarediva 01:08 PM 12-20-2014
This is such an old thread.

The same is true for nap time at daycare. You cannot force a child to sleep. The parents who say "these providers are so mean to force children to sleep for X time in the afternoon and now I can't get them to sleep at night before they took a long nap at daycare/preschool/whatever"

^ contradictory statement.

I also don't know a single parent who keeps the evening/bedtime routine consistent. There is real life. Errands, phone calls, rushed meals. Our schedule is always busier/more active for the children as well. It is also so consistent here that after lunch, the kids start prepping themselves for story/cuddles and rest time. At lunch, the kids are saying "I'm so tired!"

I find that children who spend the most 1:1 time with their parents are the easiest to get to bed. Most kids realize that the bedtime fight is a good way to get some easy attention. It's also typically positive attention (more reading, back rubs, snuggles with parent/s).

EVERY MONDAY MORNING like clockwork I have cranky, miserable, whiny kids who are unable to participate to the point that I do NOT plan anything but a laid back/easy going day. Nobody napped, they were dragged from activity to activity and place to place. Late bedtimes. Lots of excitement. Nap times gradually (and noticeably) decrease from Monday (a good 3 hrs) to Friday (60-90 minutes). They get up happier and come in happier as the days progress. I offer children books, busy bags, quiet puzzles and sensory shakers on their mats. They always lay down and go to sleep instead.

I am REQUIRED by the state to offer a rest period. If the children sleep, they sleep.

Sleep begets sleep. Hyperactivity in the evening is most likely an overtired kid. My own 6 year old naps on weekends and breaks from school. He has no problem with bedtime. He comes home from school exhausted by Friday without a nap all week. He sleeps a good 2 hours on weekends and 8-6 M-F. He often falls asleep during our reading in bed.
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lovemykidstoo 04:40 PM 12-20-2014
Maybe if parents didn't come at 5:00 to pickup and expect kids to settle down and sleep by 7:30, they may have better luck. Could any of us get home at 5:00 and go to sleep for the night at 7:30?
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Leigh 07:15 PM 12-20-2014
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
Maybe if parents didn't come at 5:00 to pickup and expect kids to settle down and sleep by 7:30, they may have better luck. Could any of us get home at 5:00 and go to sleep for the night at 7:30?
I thought the same thing. The kids that I have heard of having sleep issues are the ones who come home at 5:30 or 6, feed their kids and put them straight to bed. Thing is, these providers' observations about naptime come from experience, BUT medical EXPERTS state the same: Kids NEED naps. 12 hours at night is NOT what kids need. They need daytime rest. Until at least age 6. It really saddens me when I hear that "MY kid doesn't need a nap" when the kid is 18 months, 2 years, 3 years old. The ONLY response to that is YES.THEY.DO. The thing for parents to work on is to find a way to make daytime naps work with nighttime sleep. Weekdays AND weekends. KIDS NEED IT!
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Unregistered 09:46 AM 03-06-2015
My 6 year old should not be required to take a 2-3 hour nap. She does not nap in school. if you lay her down with nothing to do for hours then of course she will fall asleep. If she does take a 2-3 hour nap then she won't go to bed at night. I was told that she could look at books while the others napped, but then they made her lay down for nap anyway. Not happy.
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Blackcat31 10:19 AM 03-06-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My 6 year old should not be required to take a 2-3 hour nap. She does not nap in school. if you lay her down with nothing to do for hours then of course she will fall asleep. If she does take a 2-3 hour nap then she won't go to bed at night. I was told that she could look at books while the others napped, but then they made her lay down for nap anyway. Not happy.
So switch daycares then.

Why keep her somewhere that isn't doing what you agreed upon?

As a parent it is YOUR responsibility to find care that meets your/your child's needs. It's NOT the providers responsibility to offer only what you want.

As a self-employed business owner, SHE gets to decide what services she will offer. As a parent, YOU get to decide if those services work for you.

If not, find care that will.
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laundrymom 10:32 AM 03-06-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
So switch daycares then.

Why keep her somewhere that isn't doing what you agreed upon?

As a parent it is YOUR responsibility to find care that meets your/your child's needs. It's NOT the providers responsibility to offer only what you want.

As a self-employed business owner, SHE gets to decide what services she will offer. As a parent, YOU get to decide if those services work for you.

If not, find care that will.

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Josiegirl 10:33 AM 03-06-2015
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
Maybe if parents didn't come at 5:00 to pickup and expect kids to settle down and sleep by 7:30, they may have better luck. Could any of us get home at 5:00 and go to sleep for the night at 7:30?
Ummm yes
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Unregistered 07:46 PM 03-07-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
So switch daycares then.

Why keep her somewhere that isn't doing what you agreed upon?

As a parent it is YOUR responsibility to find care that meets your/your child's needs. It's NOT the providers responsibility to offer only what you want.

As a self-employed business owner, SHE gets to decide what services she will offer. As a parent, YOU get to decide if those services work for you.

If not, find care that will.
I didn't post that to be hateful. I just wanted to share that I too have a problem with my 6 year old and napping at daycare. She is still there because she has been there since she was 1 and it is a very special place for her. The provider asked that she stay even when school started. I have looked into before & after school care and summer care for her. It will be a sad day for all of us when we have to move her.
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Tags:demanding parents, group care, nap times, naptime issues, no naps, parental life choices, parents wanting special, sleep - length, the post that would not end
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