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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>My Holidays Don’t Work For A DC Family
mrsp'slilpeeps 09:24 AM 05-01-2012
MY husband books his 2 week holidays in the summer seperately, because he is not allowed to overlap with the other guys at work.

So I book my holidays the same as his.

I have one DC family that is going on their holidays at the end of July till the 2nd week of August.

They told me this a month ago. My hubby cant get those days off.
I have one week booked off mid july and one week off at the end of august.

They are mad that I cant take the same days off as them.

They dont have anyone too look after their kids that long.

So what am I supposed to do? Stay at home for them?

All of my other families are ok with my holidays.

What would you tell them?
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SunshineMama 09:27 AM 05-01-2012
I can understand their frustration and I can empathize with them, however they should be able to understand that you need time with your family as well.

Take your vacation with DH. Be prepared to lose that family, but honestly, I would not want to work with a family who didnt respect my need for family time too. 2 months is plenty of time for them to find alternative arrangements..
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LittleD 09:35 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:

They are mad that I cant take the same days off as them.



What would you tell them?
Well, why can't they take the same days off as you? I love how some families expect you to revolve your life around them! I have one mom who will try to co-ordinate our holidays together, but she understands sometimes thta just doesn't happen.

Tell them that you have to take the opportunity that presents yourself. They have 3 months to find suitable alternate care. Ask them if there is anyway they can switch their vacation to match yours because there is no way you can change yours. Personally, I'm done feeling bad, and you should be to!
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cheerfuldom 09:35 AM 05-01-2012
Do you not have something concerning this in your contract? I put that parents are always required to have a plan B regarding childcare and it is up to them to provide alternative care when my vacation and holidays come around. I have had parents ask if I can watch kids on my vacation time. I always say no and then forget about it. Only you can allow their comments to ruin your own vacation. Just take the days and they will have to plan accordingly. Do not even apologize, you aren't doing anything wrong.

I do provide a list of local providers that accept temp. kids but it is up to the parents to arrange that themselves.
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Ariana 09:36 AM 05-01-2012
I would just say sorry but this is how it's gonna work I totally understand that they may not have care so why don't they rearrange THEIR holiday to coincide with yours?
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mrsp'slilpeeps 09:37 AM 05-01-2012
I am only going to be gone for the 5 days they need me. I dont think thats such a big deal.

And It's not like they have to pay me AND someone else. I dont get paid when their kids dont come.
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My3cents 09:37 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:
I can understand their frustration and I can empathize with them, however they should be able to understand that you need time with your family as well.

Take your vacation with DH. Be prepared to lose that family, but honestly, I would not want to work with a family who didnt respect my need for family time too. 2 months is plenty of time for them to find alternative arrangements..
bump. Have a policy book and stick with it. I take two weeks of paid vacation and I have to pick these weeks according to what my husband can get for vacation weeks- he has to pick what weeks are available and everyone picks on a cycle of turns. We never know when our vacation weeks are going to be until the pick. We can hope but its done on fair rotating system. My parents have plenty of time to plan for our vacations and they all understand that I need family time too- I also need a steady income to be able to continue to do what I do.
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mrsp'slilpeeps 09:39 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I would just say sorry but this is how it's gonna work I totally understand that they may not have care so why don't they rearrange THEIR holiday to coincide with yours?
Because they already booked the time off from their work, and they cant switch it.

I tried to take the same days but hubby's work said no.
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Nellie 09:41 AM 05-01-2012
I'm in a horrible mood so I hope I don't offend anyone. Don't worry about your DC family. I think it is increadible rude that they would even think about asking you to take your vacation when they are on theres. If you like me I have not closed DC for illness in over 2 years. I haven't closed for personal reasons and have found a sub for any dc appointments. If one of my families ever gave me crud about my unpaid vacation(typically a Friday and Monday twice a year) I'd be pissed. I doubt any other DC would accomidate this family with taking there vaction when they take theres. They need a NANNY.
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wdmmom 09:43 AM 05-01-2012
I have never had anyone tell me that my time off doesn't work for them or interferes. If they did, I'd gladly offer to stay home if they wanted to reimburse me what I've already put into my trip. So far, about $1900 in the deposit, tires, clothes and shoes, etc. And tell them they have to pay for all spots in the daycare since their child will be the only one coming.
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JenNJ 09:46 AM 05-01-2012
You tried. That is the best you can do. Now, they need to be parents and make arrangements. There are nannies, back up sitters, high school/college kids, and centers that are all available. When they say they "can't" find care, it means they don't want to. I could call ONE center and have a week's care for my kids. I could call Monday Morning Moms and have a temp dayhome today. I could put an ad at the local college and have a slew of interviews for sitters this weekend. It doesn't take a lot of effort.
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Nellie 09:53 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Because they already booked the time off from their work, and they cant switch it.

I tried to take the same days but hubby's work said no.
You have given them more than ample time. Not your fault they can't switch. This is what back up care is for.
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DBug 10:46 AM 05-01-2012
I can tend to be passive-agressive, but when something like this comes up, I'll say things like "Oh no! What are you going to do? Can your mom come and stay with you? Can you use sick days? Oh my, I hope your boss isn't too upset! Too bad you've already used up your personal days!"

But yes, I know, that's just evil

Don't even give that family a second thought. Don't worry about how they're going to find care for THEIR child, and enjoy your vacation!!
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Angelwings36 10:55 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
MY husband books his 2 week holidays in the summer seperately, because he is not allowed to overlap with the other guys at work.

So I book my holidays the same as his.

I have one DC family that is going on their holidays at the end of July till the 2nd week of August.

They told me this a month ago. My hubby cant get those days off.
I have one week booked off mid july and one week off at the end of august.

They are mad that I cant take the same days off as them.

They dont have anyone too look after their kids that long.

So what am I supposed to do? Stay at home for them?

All of my other families are ok with my holidays.

What would you tell them?
"Hey Dcf sorry that you were unable to book off the same holidays as ME, maybe it will work out better next year."
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MarinaVanessa 10:57 AM 05-01-2012
Here's what I would have said:

"Hi Sally, I was thinking about our discussion about how your vacation doesn't coincide along with everyone else's here at daycare. As you are already well aware, I schedule the daycare's closing dates based on my husbands approved vacation. Once he is given his approved vacation time I then notify the other daycare families. They in turn choose to either request to take the same vacation time off or find alternate childcare for the time that the daycare is closed. This is the way that it has always worked. Here is a list of other daycare providers in this area that you can call that may be able to provide temporary back-up childcare."

Because this situation happens occasionally I call other daycare homes that are close to me and introduce myself and ask them whether or not they would be willing to offer temporary back-up childcare if they have the space, for the days that I am closed. Usually most are willing (who wants to say no to more money if you room right) so I already have a list ready to hand out when it's time for my vacations.

If you require that your vacation time be paid be prepared for the "But I can't afford to pay you and another daycare" talk. This is a completely different conversation.
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Unregistered 11:12 AM 05-01-2012
I had one mom ask me just the other day if I could switch my week in August to the next week instead of the one I told them...her family is about 12 hours away and they are having a family reunion....my first instinct was to refuse but I really didn't have any reason to so I said I would switch...since her kid is the one other full-time one I have (the others are all part-time ) I decided it wouldn't kill me... My dh is off all summer and we never go away so it wasn't such a big problem.

I can see how hard it is for you though...there must be teenagers or maybe even a stay at home mom who might like to make a little spending money for that week ...the parents have plenty of time to be looking and interviewing someone right now...
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Blackcat31 11:20 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
Here's what I would have said:

"Hi Sally, I was thinking about our discussion about how your vacation doesn't coincide along with everyone else's here at daycare. As you are already well aware, I schedule the daycare's closing dates based on my husbands approved vacation. Once he is given his approved vacation time I then notify the other daycare families. They in turn choose to either request to take the same vacation time off or find alternate childcare for the time that the daycare is closed. This is the way that it has always worked. Here is a list of other daycare providers in this area that you can call that may be able to provide temporary back-up childcare."

Because this situation happens occasionally I call other daycare homes that are close to me and introduce myself and ask them whether or not they would be willing to offer temporary back-up childcare if they have the space, for the days that I am closed. Usually most are willing (who wants to say no to more money if you room right) so I already have a list ready to hand out when it's time for my vacations.

If you require that your vacation time be paid be prepared for the "But I can't afford to pay you and another daycare" talk. This is a completely different conversation.
diplomatic, understanding, respectful and yet still taking your vacation when YOU want to NOT when they want you too! Excellent reply MV!
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TBird 11:35 AM 05-01-2012
My Vacation schedule is released during the first week in January of every year. The opening paragraph is as follows:

Below, I have mapped out my closing dates for the remainder of the year. Although I may not always know this much of the schedule in advance, I am committed to giving ample notice, so that your family has enough time to plan ahead. Similar to most other daycare businesses (and in all fairness to my family and personal life), it would be impossible for me to coordinate my closing dates, with all of my clients’ schedules. Although your back-up providers should already be in place, if anyone would like any referrals on back-up care, please feel free to see me at any time.

I have them sign & date it at the bottom. I keep the bottom portion & they keep the top. It's speak then or forever hold their peace.
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momofboys 11:41 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Because they already booked the time off from their work, and they cant switch it.

I tried to take the same days but hubby's work said no.
Too bad for them. Geez - they have 3 months to find a back-up, is it that impossible?
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DCMom 11:56 AM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
Here's what I would have said:

"Hi Sally, I was thinking about our discussion about how your vacation doesn't coincide along with everyone else's here at daycare. As you are already well aware, I schedule the daycare's closing dates based on my husbands approved vacation. Once he is given his approved vacation time I then notify the other daycare families. They in turn choose to either request to take the same vacation time off or find alternate childcare for the time that the daycare is closed. This is the way that it has always worked. Here is a list of other daycare providers in this area that you can call that may be able to provide temporary back-up childcare."

Because this situation happens occasionally I call other daycare homes that are close to me and introduce myself and ask them whether or not they would be willing to offer temporary back-up childcare if they have the space, for the days that I am closed. Usually most are willing (who wants to say no to more money if you room right) so I already have a list ready to hand out when it's time for my vacations.

If you require that your vacation time be paid be prepared for the "But I can't afford to pay you and another daycare" talk. This is a completely different conversation.

Perfect answer!

I give my dcp's a tentative list of holidays/vacation days/closed days that I plan to be closed for the entire year with their contract renewal in January. I also note on the bottom that 'BACK-UP CARE IS THE PARENTS RESPONSIBILITY I also note on the parent board two weeks before the date is coming up.

That way there is no confusion as to when you will be closed and they will have to find back up care.
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Ariana 12:24 PM 05-01-2012
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Because they already booked the time off from their work, and they cant switch it.

I tried to take the same days but hubby's work said no.
Exactly! My point being that they can't switch and neither can you. Unfortunately that is someting you have to deal with when your kids are in home daycare. Many parents choose centre care for this very reason. No time off and no vacation days off. Always a supply to fill in.
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littlemissmuffet 06:35 AM 05-02-2012
I would NEVER even consider coinciding my vacation times with any of my dayacre families - even if I knew the majority of families were taking the same week off ... I already compromise enough to make my daycare families happy - that is just asking way too much.

And a parent having the audacity to tell me that MY vacation time doesn't work for them??? Too bad, so sad.

My families know upon enrollment that I take 2 vacation weeks off with pay each year (give schedule out in January) - I recommend they either use their own vacation time or ensure they have alternative care options. I did my job - NOW DO YOURS, PARENTS!

Some parents can be more immature and needy than their children!
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mrsp'slilpeeps 09:17 AM 05-02-2012
Thanks ladies for the backbone help!!!!

I finalized my holidays with my hubby, printed them up and handed them out to all the parents.

all except the family in question said, awesome now we can plan around you and you deserve your holidays because I am always there for them.

I told them all that it is final and I can not change the days.
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Ariana 09:22 AM 05-02-2012
Originally Posted by mrsp'slilpeeps:
Thanks ladies for the backbone help!!!!

I finalized my holidays with my hubby, printed them up and handed them out to all the parents.

all except the family in question said, awesome now we can plan around you and you deserve your holidays because I am always there for them.

I told them all that it is final and I can not change the days.
You go girl
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christinaskids 09:24 AM 05-02-2012
Im sorry- but are you flippin kidding me? That is extremely rude for them to get mad because you won't switch your vacation days. And I think its ridiculous that you would even begin to feel bad about it or try to accomidate them. Sure if there is no other reason to switch a week off, then I'd do it but if I tried and it wasn't happening, I wouldn't let them get mad at ME about it.
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