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Heart12 07:24 PM 07-26-2016
Im a new provider & Ive been advertising for an infant opening I will have starting in September. While I was on vacation last week, I spoke with several interested families & told them all that I would be scheduling interviews when I returned home. I set up 3 interviews for this week & the first family came tonight. We totally hit it off & they decided to sign on the spot. I emailed the other interviews to let them know that I have filled the spot. The woman that I was supposed to interview with tomorrow FREEEAAAKKKEDD out on me!! She kept messaging me of how disappointed they were, saying that I shouldn't have made it sound like the spot was theirs (whaat?!) I should have told her that I have a waiting list (I didnt) so that they could have had the first interview, how hopefully they can find care on such short notice etc. I apologized twice for her feeling disappointed & explained that I dont enroll based on fcfs, but rather who is a right fit & this family just happened to it- but she didnt get it. Just whoa.
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LysesKids 08:11 PM 07-26-2016
Originally Posted by Heart12:
Im a new provider & Ive been advertising for an infant opening I will have starting in September. While I was on vacation last week, I spoke with several interested families & told them all that I would be scheduling interviews when I returned home. I set up 3 interviews for this week & the first family came tonight. We totally hit it off & they decided to sign on the spot. I emailed the other interviews to let them know that I have filled the spot. The woman that I was supposed to interview with tomorrow FREEEAAAKKKEDD out on me!! She kept messaging me of how disappointed they were, saying that I shouldn't have made it sound like the spot was theirs (whaat?!) I should have told her that I have a waiting list (I didnt) so that they could have had the first interview, how hopefully they can find care on such short notice etc. I apologized twice for her feeling disappointed & explained that I dont enroll based on fcfs, but rather who is a right fit & this family just happened to it- but she didnt get it. Just whoa.
Welcome to the world of childcare... from a gal who grew up in Montgomery Co. I have had it happen to me also; some parents just don't get that we pick who we want, not just FCFS - and yeah, many parents don't get that we interview them just like they interview us
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Nisaryn 09:51 PM 07-26-2016
Originally Posted by Heart12:
Im a new provider & Ive been advertising for an infant opening I will have starting in September. While I was on vacation last week, I spoke with several interested families & told them all that I would be scheduling interviews when I returned home. I set up 3 interviews for this week & the first family came tonight. We totally hit it off & they decided to sign on the spot. I emailed the other interviews to let them know that I have filled the spot. The woman that I was supposed to interview with tomorrow FREEEAAAKKKEDD out on me!! She kept messaging me of how disappointed they were, saying that I shouldn't have made it sound like the spot was theirs (whaat?!) I should have told her that I have a waiting list (I didnt) so that they could have had the first interview, how hopefully they can find care on such short notice etc. I apologized twice for her feeling disappointed & explained that I dont enroll based on fcfs, but rather who is a right fit & this family just happened to it- but she didnt get it. Just whoa.
I was an infant only provider so I get this a lot as well. However, it wouldn't have hurt to do the interviews anyway and THEN tell this particular lady that you felt she fit best. I mean, what if the others were just as good or even BETTER? You wouldn't know since you didn't take the time to see. That is what I do. I schedule all my interviews and then let them know that on Friday I will send out my decisions. Yes, I've had people get pissy about why I would interview several families for the one spot and yes they get annoyed when I explain its for the "best fit" as if they are SO special that they are THE ones. You just have to grit your teeth. And no matter what, they will ALL act as if you were their last hope simply because they aren't getting their way!
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JackandJill 04:21 AM 07-27-2016
Sounds like you dodged a bullet on that one! Glad you found a family you will enjoy working with
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Thriftylady 04:46 AM 07-27-2016
I would have probably done the other interviews just so I could pick best fit. But this parent has shown you how she is to work with so you are probably better off as far as she goes!
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Blackcat31 05:41 AM 07-27-2016
Originally Posted by Heart12:
Im a new provider & Ive been advertising for an infant opening I will have starting in September. While I was on vacation last week, I spoke with several interested families & told them all that I would be scheduling interviews when I returned home. I set up 3 interviews for this week & the first family came tonight. We totally hit it off & they decided to sign on the spot. I emailed the other interviews to let them know that I have filled the spot. The woman that I was supposed to interview with tomorrow FREEEAAAKKKEDD out on me!! She kept messaging me of how disappointed they were, saying that I shouldn't have made it sound like the spot was theirs (whaat?!) I should have told her that I have a waiting list (I didnt) so that they could have had the first interview, how hopefully they can find care on such short notice etc. I apologized twice for her feeling disappointed & explained that I dont enroll based on fcfs, but rather who is a right fit & this family just happened to it- but she didnt get it. Just whoa.
I can see why she was upset.
I am not condoning the way she behaved but you agreed to meet with her at a specific time.
You didn't say "Ok, I will meet with you Wednesday. Unless someone else gets the spot first."

I would have interviewed every family I had agreed to interview and after interviewing ALL the candidates then I would have given it a some thought for a day or two and then made a "best fit" decision.

The family you signed on might be a good fit but one of the families you cancelled on may have been a great fit.

Another aspect of this situation to consider is say the first family is a good fit for the first few days/weeks and then isn't. Now you've eliminated the possibility of contacting the next best fit family and offering them a spot...essentially burning a bridge so to speak.

I agree that the woman's behavior was a bit out of line and she/her family may not have been a good fit but there is a lesson in what she said.
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Rockgirl 06:29 AM 07-27-2016
She shouldn't have assumed the spot was hers, but I agree with the posters who said they'd do the interviews.
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Miss A 06:51 AM 07-27-2016
I agree with BlackCat, there is a lesson in her words.

I always conduct all interviews I have scheduled, as I feel it is best business practice. The other two families may have been a better fit for your program, or they may have been so interested in your program that they would be willing to be wait listed in case one family didn't work out.

I always think about how the best advertising for our line of work is word of mouth, and even if that family was not selected into care, they may have referred friends with different age children to your program, or shared with others what aspect of your care was what drew them to you in the first place.

You live and learn, and now you know for future reference to meet with all potential clients, explain to them you are conducting multiple interviews for one position, and that you will call/email when you have made your final decision.
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MunchkinWrangler 07:41 AM 07-27-2016
Dodged a bullet! I wouldn't concern yourself with it. Just don't respond, block if you have to and move on. If she keeps it up tell her it's harassment.

Glad to hear you found a good fit right away!
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MunchkinWrangler 07:46 AM 07-27-2016
And yes I do agree that you should have done all the interviews because it's hard to make a decision with just one meeting. Next time I would at least give everyone a chance and if one doesn't work and you still have interest from the others you can find a replacement.
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organicdclady 08:25 AM 07-27-2016
I don't necessarily agree that all interviews should be conducted.
It may be good practice but in all honesty, interviewing sucks.
I really dislike interviewing. Especially if you have multiple days of interviews set up. I will only interview in the evening-don't get me started on why I have to do that. Keeping an extra clean house, paperwork on the ready, not being able to attend my sons practice/events, no family dinner, etc. It is just not worth it to go through all that when a good percent of the time the family doesn't show up anyway.
If I find someone who is a fit I have no problem letting other families know.
However, I do let them know that I will add them to my interest list and if I have a spot that should meet their needs I will call them.
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daycarediva 08:33 AM 07-27-2016
I would have done the interviews and then let them know. I have a waiting list from this- and these families know I didn't pick them first. Sometimes I just have 3 great families interview for one space and I end up deciding based on gender and/or age to 'even out' my current group.
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Blackcat31 09:19 AM 07-27-2016
Originally Posted by organicdclady:
I don't necessarily agree that all interviews should be conducted.
It may be good practice but in all honesty, interviewing sucks.
I really dislike interviewing. Especially if you have multiple days of interviews set up. I will only interview in the evening-don't get me started on why I have to do that. Keeping an extra clean house, paperwork on the ready, not being able to attend my sons practice/events, no family dinner, etc. It is just not worth it to go through all that when a good percent of the time the family doesn't show up anyway.
If I find someone who is a fit I have no problem letting other families know.
However, I do let them know that I will add them to my interest list and if I have a spot that should meet their needs I will call them.
If you are a provider that dislikes interviewing then a better, more professional option would have been to schedule only one interview at a time.

Dont schedule any more unless the one you had isnt a good fit.

I don't think the OP should have to enjoy interviewing, just that she shouldn't schedule them at all if she has no intention of following through on them. (That is where my issue lies.)
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MunchkinWrangler 10:50 AM 07-27-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
If you are a provider that dislikes interviewing then a better, more professional option would have been to schedule only one interview at a time.

Dont schedule any more unless the one you had isnt a good fit.

I don't think the OP should have to enjoy interviewing, just that she shouldn't schedule them at all if she has no intention of following through on them. (That is where my issue lies.)
I hate interviewing as well but I mark my time sheet and I only schedule one a day and I'm very selective , I try my best to know as much as I can before scheduling the interview so I feel more at ease and all the important info has been discussed that way the interview is only 30 to 45 min tops.
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mommyneedsadayoff 11:01 AM 07-27-2016
I can see both sides. As a parent, I wouldn't want to interview just for appearance sake if the provider has no intention of selecting me. As a provider, even if a family seems perfect, I would want to interview more than one just to make sure I'm making the right choice and to also add to my wait list.

As far as this parent, I would be glad you are not accepting them. You apologized twice and they are continuing their tantrum. They expected that an interview guaranteed the spot (asking how they will find care on such short notice, ect), so imagine how mad they would be to interview and still not get it.
Hope everything works out with the new family!
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AmyKidsCo 01:34 PM 07-27-2016
I did the same thing a year ago and had a mom very upset with me. Worse, the mom works in the same school district as my DH! We did go through the interview anyway and got along really well - I might have gone with her baby instead of the other one if I'd met them before enrolling the first family.

Ironically she was SO upset at the time but later when I had an opening she wanted to stay where she was.
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Thriftylady 01:41 PM 07-27-2016
I also hate interviewing. The OP is new, so one thing I have found is that I never schedule an interview without doing a "pre" interview of sorts. I do this by phone, messenger, or email depending how they contact me. I ONLY offer the in person interview if they seem like they may be a good fit. There are signs of I have learned over time that give me clues about that. And if they don't show up the the interview, I likely won't reschedule it. I won't for sure if they no call no show. Also based on the questions they ask and such it helps me see if they will be a good fit. Then the interview if I do one, narrows it down more.

So to the OP I would suggest for next time, go ahead and do all interviews to find the best fit. Don't offer a spot just to fill a spot, sometimes that backfires. Never hold a spot without a contract and deposit. There is more but that gets you started.
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Josiegirl 04:06 PM 07-27-2016
I've never had this problem. I'm lucky to get 3 calls a year, let alone within the same month.
Truthfully, I'm not sure what I would've done. In order to cancel the other scheduled interviews, I'd make sure money exchanged hands and contracts were signed, all that jazz. It'd be just my luck potential dcf would rave and agree and commit verbally and I'd love them and then they'd never contact me again.
As for it being right or wrong to cancel the other interviews, I really don't see anything wrong with it except possibly burning bridges. Other than that, you're not wasting anyone's time and you let them know promptly. It's not like a dcparent who schedules an interview and never shows/never calls.
The other thought I had was that some people can be vengeful and mean-spirited, not to mention being told no kinda aggravates them enough to spread vicious gossip. And while some people don't listen to that kind of talk, there are always people who do.
With all that said, I'm glad you found a dcf who clicks that well, they're not all that common.
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Rockgirl 10:49 AM 07-28-2016
Originally Posted by organicdclady:
I don't necessarily agree that all interviews should be conducted.
It may be good practice but in all honesty, interviewing sucks.
I really dislike interviewing. Especially if you have multiple days of interviews set up. I will only interview in the evening-don't get me started on why I have to do that. Keeping an extra clean house, paperwork on the ready, not being able to attend my sons practice/events, no family dinner, etc. It is just not worth it to go through all that when a good percent of the time the family doesn't show up anyway.
If I find someone who is a fit I have no problem letting other families know.
However, I do let them know that I will add them to my interest list and if I have a spot that should meet their needs I will call them.
I just consider it part of the gig. One of my least favorite parts, no doubt, but necessary.
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Nurse Jackie 02:40 PM 07-28-2016
I guess it all depends. I have so many potential families call and schedule an interview that end up no call/no show. If I interview someone and I like them I'll offer the spot if not I'll move on to the next interview. However I do let them know that I am actively looking to fill the spot when they call so if I fill the spot I'll let them know. I've personally called to confirm interviews and had parents tell me they interviewed with a daycare the day before and decided to sign up on the spot with out having any intentions on calling to cancel the interview they scheduled with me.
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